Dealing with another mother...:( Updated. Again!

[DISWolves]

In hindsight, you may have been better highlighting the incident and requesting the meeting with the head via email. This way you have always got comeback, in the future, should something similar ever happen again. Schools throughout the UK all should be adopting an anti-bullying policy, were age is not a barrier. Failing an acceptable outcome, I should inform the Local Education Authority and CC the Head at the same time. Good Luck

 

[mandymouse]

Sorry you didn't get the response you were hoping for from the Headteacher. Hopefully the parent involved will get in touch and apologise for her behaviour

 

[joolz1910]

In hindsight, you may have been better highlighting the incident and requesting the meeting with the head via email. This way you have always got comeback, in the future, should something similar ever happen again. Schools throughout the UK all should be adopting an anti-bullying policy, were age is not a barrier. Failing an acceptable outcome, I should inform the Local Education Authority and CC the Head at the same time. Good Luck

I handed her a letter because I decided to put it in writing just in case I couldn't see her today. A friend at work suggested writing to the Chair of Governors and asking what they intended to do about it.

Sorry you didn't get the response you were hoping for from the Headteacher. Hopefully the parent involved will get in touch and apologise for her behaviour

I will be very surprised if she bothers. She is the type of parent who thinks she's in charge of the school, and as I am a working mum, I don't really count in her eyes.

Another friend suggested that I request that this woman has no contact with my daughter in school. I'm really angry that I was fobbed off.

 

[CustardTart]

This must be so frustrating and upsetting for you, Juliette.

I think I would allow a couple of days to see if any response is forthcoming from this woman. If not, rightly or wrongly, I personally would feel compelled to speak to her directly. Irrespective of what she thought/assumed had occurred, she herself had no right to accost your daughter in that intimidating and overbearing way. If she had a problem, she should have spoken to the class teacher or Olivia's parent/guardian. As for opening the car door - wow!!!

TBH I always hesitate to offer my two pence in these situations as I remember how much my own children hated me getting involved in school-related stuff. But this isn't a disagreement between kids that will blow over, this is an adult abusing her position of power and over-stepping the mark... I really hope you get the opportunity to talk with her and put her straight...

 

[Cyrano]

I would raise it with the Education Authority if the matter is not resolved to your satisfaction. Defintely make sure you put it in writing as the Council will have a procedure and timetable that they have to deal with matters under. Email and telephone calls always seem to get treated differently, even though they are another form of communication.

Hope you can get closure on this

 

[joolz1910]

Thank you to everyone for your excellent advice and support.

The other mother has just rang me! She started off a bit high-handed and defensive, playing down the whole situation. I was having none of it, so putting on my best teacher voice, I told her that she was, under no circumstances, to speak directly to Olivia in that way again. I told her that her daughter had been (allegedly) upset by a child, but that my daughter had been left upset and intimidated by an adult - which I thought was totally unacceptable.

Anyway, to cut a long story short, she eventually cracked and admitted that what she had done was 'unforgivable' and that she had been worrying about it all weekend. She had looked at it from my perspective and seen that she had handled the whole situation very badly.

I was gracious (and told her that we should now just move on and forget it), as I had received an apology and an acknowledgement that what she had done was wrong. I told her that in future she should involve the class teacher or speak directly to me, and she agreed.

Anyway, all done and dusted now. Until the next time.

 

[Tinks1984]

Oh wonderful news Joolz! I'd just caught up with the thread from your first post telling about the Headteacher (and was still annoyed ) until I finally reached the final post you've just done.

I'm so pleased you've managed to speak with the girls mother, and that she's finally accepted she was wrong in confronting your little girl. As you said, if there are ever any issues (and I'm sure there never will be!) then she should contact you and not your daughter. I'm sure most adults would normally do this to begin with, no matter how upset they are

I hope your little girl is feeling better about school again and she doesn't have to worry about seeing the other parent again

 

[joolz1910]

Oh wonderful news Joolz! I'd just caught up with the thread from your first post telling about the Headteacher (and was still annoyed ) until I finally reached the final post you've just done.

I'm so pleased you've managed to speak with the girls mother, and that she's finally accepted she was wrong in confronting your little girl. As you said, if there are ever any issues (and I'm sure there never will be!) then she should contact you and not your daughter. I'm sure most adults would normally do this to begin with, no matter how upset they are

I hope your little girl is feeling better about school again and she doesn't have to worry about seeing the other parent again

Thanks. I've explained the whole thing to Olivia and we've had a good chat about it. She is OK now. I still think the other mother is an utter nutter but I doubt whether she would do this again. I would have liked to have been a fly on the wall when the Head spoke to her.

 

[Pinky166]

Just caught up with todays messages....I am so glad she called you and apologised.

 

[CustardTart]

The other mother has just rang me! She started off a bit high-handed and defensive, playing down the whole situation. I was having none of it, so putting on my best teacher voice, I told her that she was, under no circumstances, to speak directly to Olivia in that way again. I told her that her daughter had been (allegedly) upset by a child, but that my daughter had been left upset and intimidated by an adult - which I thought was totally unacceptable...

Well, that's fantastic!!! You know, I'm sort of grudgingly impressed that she had the decency to call you - whether or not the Head put her under pressure, that couldn't have been easy... But you handled it brilliantly!!!

I was gracious (and told her that we should now just move on and forget it), as I had received an apology and an acknowledgement that what she had done was wrong. I told her that in future she should involve the class teacher or speak directly to me, and she agreed...

Good for you!! I also imagine you've done a lot of other Mums a favour by tackling her on this...

I've explained the whole thing to Olivia and we've had a good chat about it. She is OK now. I still think the other mother is an utter nutter but I doubt whether she would do this again. I would have liked to have been a fly on the wall when the Head spoke to her.

I'm glad Olivia's OK too - all in all, a satisfactory outcome - I'm very pleased for you both...

 

[The Fetherstons]

Just caught up with this threadOMG.

I am so glad you now have it sorted

 

[Ware Bears]

Wonderful news, thank goodness, you and Olivia can put it behind you now.

 

[Nubbedy]

Hope your Olivia is ok now, and glad you got this sorted out.

 

[Cyrano]

The other mother has just rang me! She started off a bit high-handed and defensive, playing down the whole situation. I was having none of it, so putting on my best teacher voice, I told her that she was, under no circumstances, to speak directly to Olivia in that way again. I told her that her daughter had been (allegedly) upset by a child, but that my daughter had been left upset and intimidated by an adult - which I thought was totally unacceptable.

Anyway, to cut a long story short, she eventually cracked and admitted that what she had done was 'unforgivable' and that she had been worrying about it all weekend. She had looked at it from my perspective and seen that she had handled the whole situation very badly.

I was gracious (and told her that we should now just move on and forget it), as I had received an apology and an acknowledgement that what she had done was wrong. I told her that in future she should involve the class teacher or speak directly to me, and she agreed.

Anyway, all done and dusted now. Until the next time.

Well done you

 

[mandymouse]

Thank you to everyone for your excellent advice and support.

The other mother has just rang me! She started off a bit high-handed and defensive, playing down the whole situation. I was having none of it, so putting on my best teacher voice, I told her that she was, under no circumstances, to speak directly to Olivia in that way again. I told her that her daughter had been (allegedly) upset by a child, but that my daughter had been left upset and intimidated by an adult - which I thought was totally unacceptable.

Anyway, to cut a long story short, she eventually cracked and admitted that what she had done was 'unforgivable' and that she had been worrying about it all weekend. She had looked at it from my perspective and seen that she had handled the whole situation very badly.

I was gracious (and told her that we should now just move on and forget it), as I had received an apology and an acknowledgement that what she had done was wrong. I told her that in future she should involve the class teacher or speak directly to me, and she agreed.

Anyway, all done and dusted now. Until the next time.

I am so pleased that this has all been sorted, and that she apologised to you. I hope you and your DD can now put this behind you

 

[thelittlemermaid83]

Just read this thread and OMG, I hope Olivia is ok now and i'm so glad you recieved a apology.

 

[tennisfan]

Thank you to everyone for your excellent advice and support.

The other mother has just rang me! She started off a bit high-handed and defensive, playing down the whole situation. I was having none of it, so putting on my best teacher voice, I told her that she was, under no circumstances, to speak directly to Olivia in that way again. I told her that her daughter had been (allegedly) upset by a child, but that my daughter had been left upset and intimidated by an adult - which I thought was totally unacceptable.

Anyway, to cut a long story short, she eventually cracked and admitted that what she had done was 'unforgivable' and that she had been worrying about it all weekend. She had looked at it from my perspective and seen that she had handled the whole situation very badly.

I was gracious (and told her that we should now just move on and forget it), as I had received an apology and an acknowledgement that what she had done was wrong. I told her that in future she should involve the class teacher or speak directly to me, and she agreed.

Anyway, all done and dusted now. Until the next time.

Glad the mother apologised & admitted she was in the wrong. Hope Olivia is ok now

 

[Chilly]

Just caught up with this thread. Glad you have resolved it however I think the other Mother should have apologised to your DD in person. You would expect Olivia to apologise if she had done something wrong and it is important that adults set an example.

 

[darthtatty]

well done you

 

[DISWolves]

Great news!!!!