Daughter attending bday party for twins

[My2CrazyGirls]

I have twins, and think 2 gifts. At this age, most invite the whole class. Also, some implied that the gifts should be "small" because you have to buy 2 of them. Please realize that when twins are invited to parties, their parents have to buy 2 gifts, as well. I'm glad mine are in separate classes, because when they were together in kindergarten (just one class available), parties cost me a fortune (now parties are usually single sex, and girls have a lot more parties than boys).

I don't think parents have to by 2 different gifts when their twins (or siblings for that matter) are invited to a party. When both my girls are invited to the same party, I will buy one gift from the both of them or 2 gifts from the both of them but I wrap it all together. I do spend more than I would if only one of my girls was invited but I think it is OK to combine the gift I am talking about if the party is for 1 child, not for twins).

 

[mjkacmom]

I don't think parents have to by 2 different gifts when their twins (or siblings for that matter) are invited to a party. When both my girls are invited to the same party, I will buy one gift from the both of them or 2 gifts from the both of them but I wrap it all together. I do spend more than I would if only one of my girls was invited but I think it is OK to combine the gift I am talking about if the party is for 1 child, not for twins).

I will sometimes do one gift, especially if I know the child well, but spend twice as much.

 

[riley2008]

Wow! Just wanted to comment that I am REALLY surprised by the comments about two versus one gift for two kids sharing a party. It really never crossed my mind. In our family, it certainly would not ever be a "nightmare" as one poster indicated about her children getting one gift to share. I even called my friend with the twin girls and got her take. (She got my boys each a Hex bug and one shared game and wrapped them together in a HUGE box - loved it.) Sometimes we get them shared gifts sometimes not.

I also have a coworker and her kids' birthdays are just a couple of weeks apart, same sex, and always shared parties. She "loves" getting one gift they can share that way there is no arguing about whose it is.

I even called my 30 something yo SIL who has a twin brother. The only gift that she didn't like sharing was the car when they turned 17. She says she liked getting shared gifts because she and her twin would get bigger and better gifts than their older singleton brother.

We did all agree that as long as it is truly a shareable gift, it's no problem and sometimes more appreciated that two cheap little things. We all also agreed that we give our children (and my SIL was given) choices about their parties, sharing rooms, sharing classes, et.


Hhhmmm.....you learn something new everyday. This board always gives me something to think about.

I learned today, that if I don't don't the party honorees and it's a joint party, err on the side of individual gifts. Good to know.

 

[MichelleinMaine]

Have to say I'd never expect twins invited TO a party to bring two separate gifts for a birthday child. While we've not had that exact situation, we've had siblings invited to my kids' parties and they just brought one gift-from-the-family. (And nothing any bigger or more expensive than what would a single kid coming would have brought.)


I would do separate gifts for a set of twins' party- as said- two totally different people, likely with different interests/etc.

 

[drcmk]

I usually have this problem in reverse. My twins get invited to another child's party and I end up having to buy two gifts, one from each one of my children.

Doesn't it all come out in the wash?

I mean, if you had two kids with separate birth dates, they would probably be invited to roughly the same number of parties, just for different children (since their friends would be their own age) and you'd have to buy a gift from each child for each party. It's just bad timing, I guess that your kids often get invited to the exact same parties as each other, so you have to buy those gifts at the same times rather than scattered through the year.

 

[AndreaDM]

Have to say I'd never expect twins invited TO a party to bring two separate gifts for a birthday child. While we've not had that exact situation, we've had siblings invited to my kids' parties and they just brought one gift-from-the-family. (And nothing any bigger or more expensive than what would a single kid coming would have brought.)


I would do separate gifts for a set of twins' party- as said- two totally different people, likely with different interests/etc.

I totally agree. My DD very rarely has parties, but if she did I wouldn't expect the twins to each bring a gift.

Maybe all this craziness is why I try an avoid birthday parties and just take my DD away for the weekend instead!

 

[audrey2580]

My DS7 has twins in his class and the boys have come to his party and brought 1 gift card and I never thought twice about it. My son went to their party and we brought 2 gifts cards. Our school is big on gift cards becuase we use scrip and get $$ off our tuition.

 

[MichelleinMaine]

Maybe all this craziness is why I try an avoid birthday parties and just take my DD away for the weekend instead!

After 15 years of parties for two kids... I convinced DD to do a "special day" with her best friend instead of a party for her 11th bday. She picked lunch at Ihop and afternoon of bowling. Easy peasy!

 

[It'sOffToDisneyWeGo]

I would send two gifts. I know that my situation is a little different because my sister's twins are a boy and a girl. I think individual gifts make each child feel special on their birthday.

 

[Halle]

As a parent of twins, please don't get them a gift to share. That will be a nightmare for all involved. I, personally, would rather a child not bring a gift than bring a gift that my kids have to share.

I usually have this problem in reverse. My twins get invited to another child's party and I end up having to buy two gifts, one from each one of my children.

I too have twins (30 yrs old next week) but please don't lump them together, 2 small gifts are much better than a joint gift.

 

[shortbun]

How about a movie pass and a box of theater candy for each girl?

I think this is an excellent idea!!

 

[shortbun]

Yeah, I don't get this either. I think it's fine for a few kids to go in on one gift so why would twins have to bring two gifts. One gift, card reads from X and Y. And you folks who have twins and invite the whole class for both twins-sorry but I think that's a little overboard. DS got to invite as many friends as his age until about 10, then we switched to an event for a few good friends-like movie out and sleepover for maybe 4 kids. DS never complained. Also, why all the panic about presents? Around here, lots of kids have their guests donate to a charity enmass or suggest a few charities and let the guests decide if they want to make a donation. After we started doing the event parties, we asked DS's friends to not bring gifts. He did always get a present from his best friends and we likewise got those kids gifts but privately.

 

[SlightlyocdDisneyfan]

As a parent of twins, I agree with two separate gifts. You won't go wrong with two similar small gifts, but one gift has the potential to be insensitive to the fact that they are not a unit. I would never dream of telling a gift-giver that their gift was anything less than wonderful after the fact, even if it was a joint gift, but if anyone thought to ask before hand I would encourage something to celebrate them as individuals or nothing at all.

One of the favorite gifts for my kids last year were $5 gift cards for the local ice cream shop. Each twin had enough for a giant sundae that was a hue hit!

 

[MineMail]

As the mother of twin girls, I would say to go with the two gifts for seven-year olds. I wouldn't give a "take turns" gift, like a single scooter or any kind of clothing (lol-"you can share this t-shirt.") A good shared gift would be something they could use at the same time, like a game or a two-seater beanbag chair. Something like a Easy-Bake Oven could go either way, if you throw in some mix packets and an extra apron.

When my girls were around 10 years old, then they appreciated shared gifts because cost wasn't a mystery to them anymore. For example, someone gave them a shared gift of the newest Harry Potter game for Wii last year - they knew the price tag (because they were saving to buy it) and they were thrilled that someone gave it to them! Certainly didn't need two copies of the same game and any other game would be overshadowed by Harry anyway.

They were just as thrilled with the cute little hats with ears that another girl sewed for each of them. It really is the thought that counts, so having your daughter make each something unique and cute, that's even better than a store-bought gift. Decorate an apron for each of them, make a t-shirt with their favorite animal - or give them the supplies to DIY.

I usually spend $15-20 on a gift for any child having a birthday; it doesn't matter to me if it's a joint party or not. I've heard people comment that the birthday family is saving money by having one party for two kids, but the kids don't understand that rationale. They just want to have fun and receive some gifts.

 

[disny_luvr]

As a parent of twins, please don't get them a gift to share. That will be a nightmare for all involved. I, personally, would rather a child not bring a gift than bring a gift that my kids have to share.

I usually have this problem in reverse. My twins get invited to another child's party and I end up having to buy two gifts, one from each one of my children.

I could have written this same post word-for-word. My twins would want their own gift. They don't care if it is a $5 gift card. They just want something with only their name on it and that only they can open.

Like you, when we are invited to a singleton party (which happens most of the time) I take a gift from each child not a joint gift from both.

 

[Celidh]

Just a caution about the movie pass idea. Although i think it is a great idea, as a single mom on a limited budget, if my child got a movie pass, it may be a while before I had extra money for the rest of the family to go too. ( I know it may not seem fair to take other siblings when it is their bday gift but I don't want to leave my younger son home) Or at least myself to take them. It may not seem like a big expense but for some, it is. My budget is very tight. At 7 years old, it's not like they can go on their own, at least I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving my 7 year old at the movie theatre, even if it was with another 7 year old.

I would get two gifts though. Especially if the two of them have different personalities, likes and dislikes. Sometimes a two person gift, like a board game is no fun if nobody wants to play it with you.

My suggestion for low cost gifts, as the mother of a just turned 8 year old girl is Littlest Pet Shop figures, Squinkies and Zoobles. she is just starting to get interested in reading books on her own but books just aren't as fun as a toy to many children.

 

[CTdiznymom]

I'm a mom of twins born on Leap Year! Which on occassion was a logistical nightmare to say the least. I could never understand the "one gift/two gift dilema to begin with. Why wouldn't you get 2 separate gifts? They are 2 different people. I also don't understand the "how much should I spend" problem. If each child was having their party on separate days would that make a difference in what you spent? Why is it an issue just bc they are siblings?

My kids always got separate gifts, except for maybe at Christmas. Birthdays, they always had one huge non Leap Year cake, and two separate cakes on their "real" birthday.

BTW, this coming Feb. 29th they will be 7!

 

[squirrel]

I think shared gifts are fine if it's a sharable gift-games, legos, etc.

I think at that age craft supplies would be fun. Constuction paper, glue, ribbon, glitter, etc. Sometimes you can even find craft projects all ready in a set-Michael's?

I know my niece who is 7 almost 8 loves doing crafts and baking.

 

[formill]

I have 9 year old twin girls and shared gifts or any gift at all is fine! At this age we are done with toys for the most part.....don't need any more "stuff" so this year the friends are coming over which is the important part but it is just for a fun afternoon they will not be told it is a birthday at all so no gifts/no goodie bags to buy- but think we will have a cake. I would think it very selfish and spoiled to demand individual gifts from anyone even grandma. The gifts my twins get shared or not do not identify them or have anything to do with their being two separate people -that stuff sounds crazy to me?

 

[disneysnowflake]

I'm a twin in my 40s now.
I'm a fraternal twin. My twin looks and acts nothing like me, yet people always thought we were clones. Weird.


Anyway, combined gifts were the norm for us growing up. On the most part it was fine.

I will tell you about the one bad combined gift we got... a bike. One new cute pink adorable bike for 2 girls. Well, the next day I realized that the cute new bike was really for my twin. I got a used, rusty, hand me down bike that belonged to my sister who was 11 years older than me. I never said anything, but it sucked knowing she was riding her cute pink bike with the white basket with little flowers, and I had a rusty bike that had a chain that constantly popped off. I never got the chance to even ride that stupid pink bike because it wasn't mine. I wasn't allowed.

Funny the weird random stuff you remember as kids. The shared Atari 2600 was an awesome gift though.