Dance Mom tv show- ok for kids? opinions plz

[disneymomjcs]

My DD15 and I started watching the show when it first started last year. We loved it. Now it has really changed alot this year. The fighting and bickering is getting worse. Abusive in my opinion.

My daughter is older but if she was eight I wouldn't mind the dancing but all the yelling and berating would be worrysome. Not good examples or you could tell her this isn't the way to act towards other people. She is young but girls know good and bad behavior and maybe you could also use this as a way to talk about these behaviors.

 

[Tinkerpeas hubby]

Unfortuantly this show is not far from reality with in the dance community.

My wife had trained for weeks for a competition, her best friend's (at the time) mother stole her music, hoping that she wouldn't be able to beat her daughter, she won regardless of having no music.

It's a dog eat dog world, censorship has to end some time.

 

[mjkacmom]

This is one of our favorite shows to watch as a family! My girls dance at least 4 nights a week, and get a kick out of this show. Last night, one of the teachers really gave it to the girls, telling them how much they suck, and dd11 actually cried a bit, as did others. Dd9 let it roll right off of her, as usual. Watching the show lets them know that others have it worse! Actually, my kids know a lot of it is totally scripted, but they're still entertained.

 

[Dorisk3]

While I would not allow my daughter to watch the show, I would be much more concerned about her seeing the disrespect her own father gave you upon seeing you watching the show. A private conversation between the two of you later or even his sitting down to watch and expressing his opinions would have been a much better way to handle it. I think shows such as these reality shows desensitizes young girls to the disrespect and disregard for each others feelings.

This-my 11 year old watches it, and I"m on the fence myself. However, the treatment from your husband I would not abide, you are not his daughter and can do whatever you want.

 

[disneydancemom]

sk mom! LOL yeah you are right! he is a little like Abbe! haha...maybe thats why it bothered him so much...too funny!

thanks everyone for you replies , i do appreciate it. and i know her dad didnt behave ummm...appropriately...for lack of better words. that's why i wanted to get the feedback- like, was this reaction at ALL warranted? i think you kwim.

and pretty much everyone's reactions seems- like the rating they gave it 'pg'. supervision under 10 i beleive. (my husband told me that LOL, he looked up ratings on it) oh well, whatever.

btw- i dont know who mentioned the timing of the show- when we first saw it a week or 2 ago- it started at 8pm, if thats relevant...we actually dont watch a lot of tv- but my dd loves to dance so when dancing with the stars comes on, or something like this show possibly, we hang out and bond

 

[Sgt Mickey]

I agree with the I would be more angrier with how he handled it then her watching the show.
I have never watched long enough to realize they actually SHOW dancing Maybe when Bunheads comes on that will be more age appropriate. BUT if it were me and my 8 year old dd was watching it I would say see this is grown up throwing a tantrum don't grow up and do this.

 

[maggs1035]

sk mom! LOL yeah you are right! he is a little like Abbe! haha...maybe thats why it bothered him so much...too funny!

thanks everyone for you replies , i do appreciate it. and i know her dad didnt behave ummm...appropriately...for lack of better words. that's why i wanted to get the feedback- like, was this reaction at ALL warranted? i think you kwim.

and pretty much everyone's reactions seems- like the rating they gave it 'pg'. supervision under 10 i beleive. (my husband told me that LOL, he looked up ratings on it) oh well, whatever.

btw- i dont know who mentioned the timing of the show- when we first saw it a week or 2 ago- it started at 8pm, if thats relevant...we actually dont watch a lot of tv- but my dd loves to dance so when dancing with the stars comes on, or something like this show possibly, we hang out and bond

Haha, I just watched last nights episode, I DVR it because my 5 yr old son is sometimes up and I don't want him watching it. Reason for him NOT watching is because he WILL mimick it, he watches DIY yard crashers and then goes outside and re creates what he watched in our yard! He watches the gold mining show with dad and then builds the equipment with his legos and re creates the show he just watched! Lol, same with "how its made" and "Myth busters" we have to watch him closely so he doesn't get too real! It seems like Dance moms is getting worse, I wonder how long it will last

I stated that it's on at 9 pm, which it is, but lifetime airs the previous weeks episode at 8pm

 

[Tinkerpeas hubby]

and pretty much everyone's reactions seems- like the rating they gave it 'pg'. supervision under 10 i beleive. (my husband told me that LOL, he looked up ratings on it) oh well, whatever.

Liar liar pants of fire!

 

[disneydancemom]

No, Im not kidding- he started looking the show up on his laptop(-he had a point to prove i guess) and reading reviews of it ..things like- "people who watch this show tend to watch toddlers and tiaras, mtv's 16 & pregnant"....etc.

good grief. I took the kids out of the house for a while. he was on a rant...

 

[sk!mom]

I agree with the I would be more angrier with how he handled it then her watching the show.
I have never watched long enough to realize they actually SHOW dancing Maybe when Bunheads comes on that will be more age appropriate. BUT if it were me and my 8 year old dd was watching it I would say see this is grown up throwing a tantrum don't grow up and do this.

I watched the first episode of Bunheads this week. The style of dance more closely mirrors what my DD studies- classical ballet 5 days a week with no competition and auditions for Summer intensive programs. It seemed very soap operaish and in one scene the Bunheads did some underage drinking. I'm sure my DD and I will watch but I'm not sure there will be much actual dancing on this one either. I predict that it will go the direction of Secret Life and Pretty Little Liars which I watch because of DD but it's like my weekly torture. We both look forward to Dance Moms for some reason. My poor DH is trapped in a house of girls and watches a lot more "girly crap" then he would like in order to spend some down time with our DD. He's just thankful that she grew tired of Teen Moms as he did have a problem with that one. The only one he refuses to sit through is Toddlers and Tiaras but doesn't care that we sometimes watch it- we've pretty much grown tired of watching the same train wreck week after week on that one.

 

[Olivejuicy]

I know people who took lessons at this studio and from what they say, the "antics" are actually toned down for the show.

I think the way your husband behaved was far more problematic than anything you would see on the show. At least with the show you can discuss how Abbe's behavior is unacceptable. It is harder to talk to your kid about whyyour husband is treating you like a child instead of his partner and equal.

 

[DopeyDame]

Is your husband a Notre Dame fan? If so, he may have posted about this exact incident on an ND message board that I read. Seriously, it's nearly the exact same scenario (complete with people on that board calling him out for disrespecting you!)
As for the actual show issue - no, I don't think I'd let an 8 year old watch Dance Moms. It's one of my guilty pleasures in life, but I wouldn't want a young girl to see other girls treated like that. You can get a lot of the dance clips on youtube if you want to watch those.

 

[Teamtori]

I let my daughter, who is 7, watch it. I always watch it with her and she is smart enough to know that the behavior shown by the adults is not appropriate. In fact, the kids have been known to play Abby Lee Dance Company, where one plays the mom who leaves the studio and joins Tori's dance studio because Abby is too mean.

As long as you are watching it with her, and have an open dialogue about appropriate behavior/boundries/etc. then I don't see a problem with it. Inappropriate behavior by adults is all around us...I see it as an opportunity to discuss this in the safety of our own home. She feels a lot of empathy for Maddy and the other girls.

 

[cheap traveler]

I have an 8 year old DD, and I wish I could show her this! She goes to bed at 7:30 (up at 6am), and we are very low-tech, so I can't record it. I think letting my kids watch things like this, WITH adult supervision, is a good way to bring up topics such as:

How adults should talk to you/treat you.
The hundreds of hours of hard work needed to be this good at something.
What would you say if an adult said XYZ to you?
Do you think girls that age should dress like that?
Is makeup ok? All the time or only on stage?


etc..

I think especially since your DD is in the business, this could be a great teaching moment for you.

And everyone already addressed the overbearing husband, so I'll leave that one alone

 

[DisneyMomma81]

1st of all, your husband

Secondly ~ DD watches it, the girls are amazing, I have her skip through the moms and Abbie/Abby, she just watches the dancing.

My DD dances 7 *might bump it to 8 if we add tumbling* hours a week over 2 days, her studio is nothing like ALM!

 

[rainynight]

I haven't seen the show, but I'm with your husband. Just the commericals on tv makes me think a kid shouldn't be watching it at all. In fact, we got rid of cable when our son was born since we didn't want him growing up in a house with the tv on all the time and being exposed to all that, even kid channels promote unhealthy eating and sugary junk food.

Rant over

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

I would allow mine to watch it. I censor very very little TV.
I don't get what the problem is in having children watch this show.

Guess what there are plenty of folks like this out in the world so why shouldn't they see this? I think kids should be exposed to all different ways things are handled in the world and as many different kinds of people as I can possibly expose them to. If you never see bad you have very little to judge good against.

I think this is a wonderful opportunity to discuss how she comes across to people, and how the girls may feel being talked to like this.
It is a bit over the top but not far in a lot of cases when you get to the level these girls are in any sport or dance, music,theater.

Competition is tough and not the competition where everyone is special and gets a trophy, but true competition.


As far as your DH taking the card Oh boy!! If mine EVER did that he would be trying to dislodge that card from somewhere that it would not be picking up reception. He is not my Father and has no right telling me what I can or can't watch. He is her Father and if he feels that strongly he can say he doesn't want her watching and even if I disagreed until we could discuss it I would send her out of the room but don't pull that power thing on me!
Wow. Again I am mystified by this current generation of younger woman.

Totally agree!

I have an 8 yo DD and we watch it religiously every week. I usually tape it and we watch it another night because its on after her school bedtime but last night we watched it together.
It was a doozy episode.
My daughter knows some of the episodes are staged. She loves to watch the girls dance, their costumes and make-up and to me its a prefect chance for her to learn that life isn't all roses and puppy dogs.
Whether it be Abby Miller or someone else , there are plenty of people in this world that act and treat people like Abby Miller.

I seen an episode of the View when the Dance Moms girls were on there. They themselves admitted alot of the drama and fights were staged and they never show Abby talking nice to them, hugging them or giving them praise, and she does alot.

As Hannity said, I don't censor too much TV. Her and I watched Gremlins and then watched Dance Moms right after.
My husband and son just shake their head when Dance Moms comes on and goes to watch something on one of the other TV's.

Since its made here in Pittsburgh, I love to watch different shots of the city throughout the show too.

 

[wendylovesdisney]

I watch the show ( I love trashy reality shows) I would never let my 9 year old watch it. The people are mean spirited, the adults yell at each other, the children are belittled, sometimes the talk is "grown up", I could go on...
My child will figure out the world is ugly soon enough, I don't need to give her a jump start on that realization.

 

[Tinkerpeas hubby]

No, Im not kidding- he started looking the show up on his laptop(-he had a point to prove i guess) and reading reviews of it ..things like- "people who watch this show tend to watch toddlers and tiaras, mtv's 16 & pregnant"....etc.

good grief. I took the kids out of the house for a while. he was on a rant...

Next time he's having a rant, try saying to him..
"I love you very much, but we both know that your going to regret this later on"

That is the killer line that my wife (love you) delivers when I have anything remotely like a rant

 

[mdsoccermom]

We all watch it as a family - my kids are 10and 13. We love it. It started out with me watching it, and then everyone was sucked in. The kids know that there is a lot that is staged and a lot that is not shown.