Cute Email for Men (or women with a sense of humor)

eyeoreismyhero

I'm not slow, just not as fast as some!!!
Joined
Feb 15, 2006
Messages
147
Things Men Wished Women Knew



1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

2. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up - put it down.

3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.

4. Sometimes we're not thinking about you. Live with it.

5. Get rid of your cat.

6. Sunday = Sports.

7. Anything you wear is fine - really.

8. Women wearing wonder bras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their ****s stared at.

9. You have too many shoes.

10. Crying is blackmail.

11. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.

12. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.

13. Yes, peeing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point-blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.

14. 'Yes' and 'No' are perfectly acceptable answers.

15. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

16. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.

17. Anything we said six or eight months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

18. If you don't dress like the Dawson Creek girls, don't expect us to act like the soap opera guys.

19. If something we said could be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.

20. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?

21. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.

22. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done - not both.

23. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions and neither do we.

24. You have enough clothes.

25. Nothing says 'I love you' like sex.
 
:goodvibes :teeth:

All those make sense, coming from a guys perspective, of course...but I don't get one: "don't cut your hair. ever."? :confused3 Is that really waht men want - women with frizzy hair down to where ever? Sorry for having to have this one explained!!!

and on #2 - YOU guys learn to put the seat down - I don't want to touch it if I don't have to - I CLEAN it, that enough for me.... :rotfl:

:wizard:
 
Have seen that a couple of times and everytime something new is added.
 
pansmermaidzlagoon said:
:goodvibes :teeth:

All those make sense, coming from a guys perspective, of course...but I don't get one: "don't cut your hair. ever."? :confused3

and on #2 - YOU guys learn to put hte seat down - I don't want to touch it if I don't have to - I CLEAN it, that enough for me.... :rotfl:

:wizard:

Because short are doesn't work all the time!!!

lol, my wife wanted to cut here hair so I said yes....uhh never again.

and why do we want to touch it to left it after you have been sitting?? At least when it's tp nothing thouches it but when it's down you are touching it..see 2 way street..we need it up and we lift it up no complaing
 

Yeah, I was wondering about the 'don't cut your hair' thing!
 
eyeoreismyhero said:
2. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up - put it down.
I don't mind this during the day. Yes, I can put down the toilet seat. But at 3:00 in the morning, when I have to pee REALLY bad, and it's dark and I'm still half asleep-that's another story. Do you know how horrible it is to fall into a toilet at 3:00 in the morning? It's not fun. DH now knows how not-fun it is too. I came back to bed with a wet butt and sat on him. (clean water of course ;) )
 
I don't get the hair thing either. I look more attractive with shorter hair...but every guy I've ever dated wanted it long. Some of them even AGREED I looked better with it short but still wanted it long. What is that about?
 
The toilet seat thing gets me too.

Sure - women get sick of putting it down.

Men get sick of putting it up!

So how about we SHARE the responsibilties and we can just continue to put it up, and you ladies can put it down? And neither group can complain about it.

And if we want to get into the 3am argument - all you need to do is sit. We have to AIM! IN THE DARK! So you can get your butt wet from falling in, or from sitting on seat that has fallen victim to bad aim. Take your pick. :teeth:
 
Maleficent13 said:
I don't get the hair thing either. I look more attractive with shorter hair...but every guy I've ever dated wanted it long. Some of them even AGREED I looked better with it short but still wanted it long. What is that about?

It's more difficult to drag you back into the cave if we have to try to get a hold of short hair. Long hair makes it much easier. :rotfl2:
 
eyeoreismyhero said:
It's more difficult to drag you back into the cave if we have to try to get a hold of short hair. Long hair makes it much easier. :rotfl2:

Ah! Og like long hair! :lmao:
 
My goodness - does no one turn the bathroom light on when they need to use the loo?! :rotfl:

Especially with the fact that you need to wash your hands afterwards!
 
Does nobody have the problem of guys NOT putting the seat up? My sons are guilty of that. I would love to sit down for once in my own home and be able to trust that I have a wizz-free seat to sit on. Man that's gross. I am forever cleaning the toiley. I JUST told my 9 yo that next time I find that, I'm cleaning it with his jeans and putting them back in his drawer (I won't, but sshhhhh). He's a germaphobe so it's worked so far.
 
My BF doesn't put the seat up - and I trust him to clean up if there is an accident.

I presume he has good aim.. :rotfl:
 
ckay87 said:
Does nobody have the problem of guys NOT putting the seat up? My sons are guilty of that. I would love to sit down for once in my own home and be able to trust that I have a wizz-free seat to sit on. Man that's gross. I am forever cleaning the toiley. I JUST told my 9 yo that next time I find that, I'm cleaning it with his jeans and putting them back in his drawer (I won't, but sshhhhh). He's a germaphobe so it's worked so far.

And the amount of pee on the seat is directly related to how tall they are......

as far as leaving the seat up, wait till they have a stomach virus and run to the bathroom in the middle of the night........one splash and they will remember the next time !! :rotfl2:
 
Elaine - you are sooo evil - but I like how you think :thumbsup2

Either my DH has good aim or he puts the seat up and down - I am lucky enought o not have any complaints in that area!!!!! I guess I have him trained well!!!! ;) Also, we are in the club of turning on the light at night - I didn't realize so many didn't, who knew!? :confused3

:wizard:
 
Our bathroom light is fluorescent. I turn the switch on when I get into the bathroom. By the time I'm done, it's STILL dark.

I wish I had SOME sort of skills to replace the dang thing! I HATE it! But that's why I go in the dark. And I shower in the morning - so I don't worry about washing my hands at 3 am. :)
 















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