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Why Women Shouldn't Take Men Shopping.


Dear Mrs. Samuel,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Samuel, are listed below and are
documented by our video surveillance cameras.

  1. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
  2. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.
  3. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.
  4. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
  5. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
  6. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
  7. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his
  8. nose.
  9. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
  10. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.
  11. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.
  12. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
  13. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

    And last, but certainly not least:
  14. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out.

------

LOLZ
 
Why Women Shouldn't Take Men Shopping.


Dear Mrs. Samuel,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Samuel, are listed below and are
documented by our video surveillance cameras.

  1. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
  2. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.
  3. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.
  4. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
  5. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
  6. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
  7. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his
  8. nose.
  9. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
  10. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.
  11. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.
  12. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
  13. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

    And last, but certainly not least:
  14. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out.

------

LOLZ

(LOL, too :-D)






http://www.disboards.com/forumdisplay.php?f=16
 

Bring lots of hand sanitizer to the euphonium lesson and sails face away from the wind today.
 
/
Russel and the machete and talking about taking Boston' Rob's had had my sids hurting I was laughing so hard. I can't remember the last time I talked to the television set (you know, because they really can hear me). "Don't let that hat out of your sight Rob!!"
 
116hstc.jpg
 
▀▄▀▄ guns n roses ▄▀▄▀
▀▄▀▄ guns n roses ▄▀▄▀
▀▄▀▄ guns n roses ▄▀▄▀
▀▄▀▄ guns n roses ▄▀▄▀
▀▄▀▄ guns n roses ▄▀▄▀
▀▄▀▄ guns n roses ▄▀▄▀
 
Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely - Backstreet Boys

So many words for the broken heart
It's hard to see in a crimson love
So hard to breathe
Walk with me, and maybe...

Nights of light so soon become
Wild and free, I could feel the sun.
Your every wish
Will be done.
They tell me...

Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with?
Tell me why
I can't be there where you are
There's something missing in my heart

Life goes on as it never ends
Eyes of stone observe the trends
They never say forever gaze if only
Guilty roads to an endless love
There's no control
Are you with me now?
Your every wish will be done
They tell me

There's nowhere to run
I have no place to go
Surrender my heart, body and soul
How can it be you're asking me to feel
The things you never show?

You are missing in my heart
Tell me why
I cannot be there where you are
 
"If the people from your past don't make it to your future, there is a reason." - Unknown

“Art is our link to the past and our gift to the future.” - Unknown

"Be yourself, an original is better than a copy." - Unknown

“There is no telling how many miles you will have to run while chasing a dream.” - Unknown

"Shoot for the moon and if you miss, you'll be among stars..." - Anonymous

"Be who you are, and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." - Dr. Suess

"Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow; Don't walk behind me, I may not lead; Walk beside me, and just be my friend." - Albert Camus

"When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace." - Jimi Hendrix

"Love the life you live, Live the life you love." - Bob Marley

"The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds." - The Notebook
 
"If the people from your past don't make it to your future, there is a reason." - Unknown
 














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