The princesses will only be at lunch. Cinderella is downstairs for photos, and we saw Snow White, Jasmine, Belle, and The Fairy Godmother during lunch (they came to each table). They also will receive a wishing star and participate in a "wishing ceremony". We had lunch there last year, and my son did receive a sword, while DD got a wand.
From what I've read, at dinner the Fairy Godmother and mice do a small "show" but don't come around to the tables. Cinderella will be downstairs, but no princesses visit tables. I don't know if the kids receive swords at dinner or not!