Convince me,,,

[Born 2 Fish]

I really have some hidden fears about the Fort Wilderness but would really like to visit (I think),,please convince me that my fears are not valid..

I have a fear that It may be hot in Aug,,is that something to worry about ??Also windshield bug splats,,will that happen on my way to the Fort ?? I also have a fear of people with the name Fish, the dry heaves, stinkfoot and toe jam, lizards, spoiled milk and lack of Christmas spirits Eggnog to be exact) also fear Christmas monkeys ghost of Christmas past,
lousy meatloaf, noise, jock itch,and I think I'm allergic to fresh air (will that be a problem at the Fort ?)
Clap on-Clap off, not having enough , stalkers, stray dogs and cats, gators, bears, bugs, dirty minds,
why aren't Singapore Slings made in Singapore ?
dirty socks,road rash, screaming kids,,
Help I've fallen and can't get up,
dirty dirt,,I hope there's not a lotta dirt at the Fort,
Oh, and is that really a bears head in the pond at the Meadows or just a rock ?

Thanks in advance for your input .

 

[snowmedic]

One top of that, will my tent fit or will it be to small for the site? How loud are the electric golf carts, will I here them from my site?
Will I get sand in my tent/trailer,
How clean are the comfort stations? Are they really comfortable?
Will it be to hot to walk barefoot on the pavement?
How warm is the pool, will they turn it down or add cold water if it is to warm
In the topic of fishing, if I " drop a line" will I catch a fish, what to use for bait, cann't use worms, that would be damaging to the Eco system.
If I don't like to fish, will there be people there that like to talk about Phish?
How much fuel would I use driving to the Fort? Take in consideration of all the bugs on the windshield, and tolls. Oh my, I have to cross bridges will there be trolls that won't let me pass?
So many questions so little time.

 

[tiggerdad]

When it rains will I dehydrate?
What time do the aircraft carriers on the lagoon start launching their planes?
Is my two year old allowed to drive the golf cart?
Do the trees still move when the wind blows?
How big is the great white crocodile that is in the canal behind 300 loop?
Will the yeti from Expedition Everest be leading the Fourth of July golf cart parade again this year?
Is the Christmas Monkey still the mascot for the Fort?
Finally, do the squirrels still cut firewood on the weekends?

 

[SCCamper]

Yes

 

[serenitygr]

Yes

 

[Random Ninja]

Yes

I am soooo glad I wasn't drinking anything when I read that.

 

[Teamubr]

I read the first sentence and then looked at the OP. I thought to myself, "Oh, this ought to be good"

j