Concerns for a friend

[tiggerlover]

I have a friend who is a diabetic and weighs somewhere around 275-300 pounds. I love her dearly, but I am worried about her. She plays roulette with her diet, her diabeties is not under control (she was diagnosed 2 years ago) and she recently admited that she hasn't had a GYN appointment in almost 8 years. I would really love for her to see a doctor, but she seems to have no desire to go, she is embarassed by her size. I would really like to be able to help her and get her to see a doctor, but I am not sure how to go about doing it. Also, I really don't know if it is my place or not, but I care. Any suggestions?

 

[Rhonda]

I love her dearly, but I am worried about her.

I really don't know if it is my place or not, but I care.

I think you just said it! Print this out and give it to her! She's lucky to have a friend who cares as much as you do.

 

[glo]

I agree with Rhonda....Maybe she can try Atkins? Ask Katholyn as her DH has had magnifiicent results with his diabetes and the initial rapid weight loss is encourging to people who feel this way. You are a very good friend...tell her you want her to continue to be

 

[wovenwonder]

Ask her to visit us here on WISH. She will get all the inspiration a person could ask for right here!

 

[Beanie]

Yes, send her to this board, we will all support and encourage her! What a wonderful friend you are for caring so much about her!!

 

[TigH]

I think you are a great friend. Sometimes it's hard to know when to approach someone - but I think in this case you'd feel worse if you didn't. Even if you talk to your friend about your concerns and she gets really upset with you, at least you can know that you tried. The friendship will remain intact if it is a true one, so muster up your courage and have a chat with your friend. If you aren't sure how to express yourself, maybe buy a pretty card with some inspirational message written on it and then use your post here as your guide to communicate your concern.

I'm sure if you offer to go with her to the Dr. that will make her feel better. Maybe getting her weight down first will help her feel more relaxed about going to the other doctor!

You know I have no problem bugging you if I think there is something bothering you...it's a risk I'm willing to take because I care about you! You never know what she'll say unless you try. Good luck!!! Your friend is very lucky that you are around to care. xo

 

[dizneegirl]

Would you be comfortable giving her a book to read? Or sending her to a website that might help?

Dr. Bernstein's Diabetes Solution advocates a low-carb plan, specifically for diabetics, to help get those blood sugars under control. Of course, the side-effect of the diet is losing weight, which won't hurt, either. http://www.diabetes-normalsugars.com/ Her first concern though, should be getting her diabetes managed. She doesn't want to lose her vision, or limbs, or anything else... diabetes is NOT something you want to play with.

I don't think there's any way to force someone (or even gently persuade them) to go to a doctor if they don't want to. I wouldn't go unless I was dying, personally. But you may be able to help her get to a point where she feels SHE controls the situation. If it's just a matter of size/vanity, the healthier she gets, the more inclined she might be to actually see a doctor.

 

[ahutton]

So many have given such good advice - If I can just add that for so many years they pushed a diabetes diet that was TOXIC to the struggles of a diabetic, if she is open to just trying to shift her eating for just a week or two to see if an Atkins (or similar plan) will help her maybe it will give her the strength to make the appointments she needs. It has been much easier for me to do it knowing that I'm making positive changes. I feel proud of what I've acomplished so far.