Competitve Cheerleading for my 5 yr old???

[tommygirl79]

We live in a small town (about 5000 or so) and a bunch of my DD5's friends (from both school and church or both) were in a new cheerleading group this past year. I was really wanting to get Aubrey involved because I thought it would be a fun thing to get her out and exercise, be with her friends, etc. So I talked to one of the moms and got her signed up for the team whose season starts again in June (after their last competition in May). One of the moms was just over and had heard that Aubrey was going to "tryout". She said that they were actually going to have tryouts this year to see what level the girls (ages 4-2nd grade) would be in. That's fine and good with me. But then she said that they really want to step up the competitive edge of the groups and do more competitions and stuff. She also listed all of their costs - $50 a week for practices (cheerleading and tumbling - an hour each to make a 2 hour practice one night a week) which is fine with me. However, their uniform cost is getting me. It's $150 for the uniform, $5 for their bloomers, $13 for a curly hairpiece, $40 for shoes, $5.00 for a hair ribbon and like $5.00 for socks. That's $218.00 for JUST their uniform. Then you add in hotel costs and competition stuff and it will be really expensive (for us at least). I have a kind of a problem with this amount but even that I could handle if I felt it was justified and would be great for my kid.

My problem, however, besides just the money is this: Do you all think it's necessary, good, okay or even detrimental for 5 year old girls having to be THIS focused and THIS competitive at this early of an age. A big part of me is wanting her to still be my little girl (Is that TOO much to ask this early in her life????) and not have to take something THAT serious. Competitions are mandatory (I understand the need for commitment - that's not the problem) and I'm afraid that - knowing 5 year olds - that my daughter might get into it, we'll pay all this money and make the commitment and she will either hate it or love it so much that we are "stuck" in this forever!

So, what does everyone think? We're really struggling with this one. We want the best for our girls, but sometimes keeping up the Jones' might not be the message we want to send to our girls this early in life.

Sorry, so long...I'm really struggling with this one.

 

[mickeyboat]

I have two DD's 5 and 6, and I would not allow them to compete in something like that at this age, for many of the reasons you listed. Is there another program available where she could learn some of the skills without the competition aspect - like tumbling?

Good luck.

Denae

 

[ryka]

My daughter came home yesterday with the paper for try outs. ( she's 5 too)
She wants to try out but I explain to her that it is alot of practice and work. I know alot of people involved and it's alot. I explained it all to her and she decided that she doesn't want to do it. They practice here 4-5 times a week sometimes more. They have to cheer at every football game too. I'm glad she decided not to.

 

[jajuan]

My DD10 started competitive cheer last year. It is over 5000 a year. When she went to the gym to take classes, I told her she could not try out because of cost and time. They go 7 hours a week. She really wanted to and took 15 classes over spring break and busted her tail. I let her try out thinking she wouldn't make the team that year (because she had only been at the gym for two weeks). She made the team and we had the BEST year ever. The competitions season was very tiring for me, but she NEVER complained. We have a very large gym with younger children and they all seemed to love it just as much. I wish DD had started younger because it gets very competive at the upper levels and I am afraid she will not be able to catch up in tumbling for layouts...too scary for me to think about...lol. Anyway...if your daughter would love it, it is well worth it. If it is a chore to get her to every practice, then it is not for her. I think it depends on the child. Good luck in your decision and sorry to be so long winded.

 

[chobie]

Seems a bit much to me for that age. However, if the money is not an issue and your DD really wants to do it and you are willing to take her out of it if does become too much, then I don't see the harm.

However, I also don't think you should feel compelled to because some of her friends are doing it or feel bad if you choose not to put her in it because there are pluses and minuses on both sides.

Do you have Upward where you live? They have baskeball teams and cheerleading teams and it is very inexpensive and non-competitive. It doesn't start until the late fall, though, and I don't know at what age it starts.

Disclaimer: I'm asking to please not get into a debate about non-competitive sports on this thread. If someone really wants to go in that direction then start another thread.

 

[ntburns22]

My DD6 does the whole competitve cheer thing. They only practice 1 hour a week maybe 2 if they have a competiton that week. We pay $250 for 9 months not including uniforms or competition fees. Our group stresses how fun it is to go out and perform. My DD loves it and has asked to do it again. As my DH says:
$100 hotel room
$45 competition fees
$60 offical video & pictures
seeing DD be excited to claim the last price trophy****PRICELESS****

We are going to have some great memories from her young cheer days.

 

[ozarkmom]

Wow my dd was a little league cheerleader (cheered at the little football games) and I though $40.00 uniforms and $15.00 pom poms were bad.

 

[Brianne]

At her age, I'd be more apt to looking into tumbling classes instead. Maybe when she's a bit older, if she wants to do it & can understand competition better, it wouldn't be bad. I've seen too many little girls (5-6 yr olds) heartbroken over not getting trophies though.

 

[va32h]

Personally I would not put my daughters through that kind of rigorous training schedule at the age of 5. I just think it's way too much. Whatever happened to playing in the backyard, for pity's sake?

 

[Disney Hot Mama]

I think she is to young for the competitive side of this sport. Kids at this age should be having fun in an informal setting. Try Outs should no be allowed for 5 year olds. Everyone should be allowed to participate. I also hate it when they take little girls this age and then put them in the uniform and put make-up all over their face. I have seen this before with a local group and it looks so fake. Let her see if she enjoys cheerleading first with a parks and rec class. If after a few years she will willing to make the committment then let her join. I think school should always come first but from what I hear the really competitive groups don't care how you do in school - your first committment is to the cheerleading group and nothing else.

Above all else you know your daughter best. Go with your gut.

 

[Tinky]

Just for perspective...
My DD7 just started competitve cheer this year. She's in tumbling and loved it so wanted to do cheer. I was kind of against it because I agree, kids need time to just "play". Anyhoo... I let her do it and the age range was supposed to be 6 and over or at least in 1st grade. Long story short.. there are a couple of girls who are 4 & 5 who are on the team because they have an older sister on the team. Its really hard on them. They have a hard time paying attention for the hour they practice. Their not bad kids, they are really good girls but I don't think they have the ability to stand still, listen, etc.. at that age for that long. I would not let my daughter participate at this age, its just too young.
I'm sure that there are exceptions out there but it makes a very long tension filled practice for the moms and the kids... IMHO just not worth it.

And as for the moms.... dont even get me started

 

[grlzmom]

Four of my six daughters have cheered competitively the last five seasons.

Daughter number five is turning five and will start this season, she is well aware of what is involved as she has been sitting through practices and all day/all weekend competitions since she was a toddler. If she were clueless about the comittment and time involved, we would NOT be letting her start this early.

It is expensive and is a HUGE time commitment. At the younger ages, it is as much if not more of a commitment on the parents part than the childs. The coaches expect attendance at all the practices/competitions (which of course are on weekends) and inevitably conflict with weekend birthday invites, etc.

Your uniform price seems right in the ballpark for average.

My girls love it, and it has been a very positive experience for them (not perfect, but positive). They are confident, outgoing, and in great physical shape. It also can be dangerous if not well coached and supervised.

I think, at age five that the parent should make the decision, not the child, as it is the parent making the commitment to get them to practice, competitions, do the hair, buy the uniform, fundraise, etc. I certainly wouldnt commit to it just because her friends are doing it.

That said, we wouldnt trade it for the world and we really love to watch them out on the floor competiting. 2 1/2 minutes of pure adrenaline rush.

Good luck and whatever you decide will be the best choice for your little girl.

 

[barkley]

yup one of dd's former school chum's parents (well mostly dad) is kicking himself for agreeing to he when dd was 6 or 7. the cost of the training, the uniforms (which at the younger age they can outgrow 2 in one year), the travel, the fundraising-and then the unexpected costs (if you have another child for whom you have to secure child care or in their case bring a sitter to supervise while mom works with the cheerleader)...has been overwhelming!

i think it's also taken a toll on the entire family-everything is driven by when the competitions and practices are (both kids have had to pass on a lot of birthday parties and other school related activities), it seems the entire family only gets to spend time together at the events (and they admit that those are always focused on the cheerleader daughter, and the other kids are begining to be resentful).

i think at that age it's more fun and socialy engaging to participate in non competative activities (dance, tumbling, gymnastics, choir, church groups). when they get older and can be more personaly responsible for the demands of competition and all that goes with it-then they (AND YOU AND THE ENTIRE FAMILY) can sign on for those.

 

[robinb]

My 6 year old DD swims competitively. She was on the YMCA swim team about 2 weeks after her 5th birthday and just finished her 2nd fall/winter season. She will compete with a different team this summer in the "fun" outdoor league. As you can tell, I see nothing wrong with a young child participating in a competitive sport.

But ... neither one of her swim teams is that strict with participation of the younger kids. It's just a fun thing when they are young. If you make it to practice, that's cool. If you don't, that's OK too. They encourage the kids to make it to one swim meet a month, but if you can't it's no biggie. When the kids get older much more is expected from them by way of practice (5 times a week for an hour - 1.5 hours and not just 3-4 times for 45 minutes) and swim meets. Our costs were about $225 for the season, $50 for her team suit, $30 for practice suits, $15 for swim caps, $30 for goggles (she loses them) and $10-$20 per meet plus transportation.

I would be most concerned about how much pressure they put on the kids at such a young age. That a group of 4 and 5 year olds would even have a "competitive edge" to "up" kinda scares me. Is there another group that you can join that would be more fun and less work?

 

[lyeag]

There is no way I would do that to a five year old. When I hear of things like this, especially cheerleading, I wonder how much of it is for the parents' own desire to live through their kids? There is no reason for such a small child to be put into such a stressful situation as you are describing.

I have 3 children and they are all involved in activites such as softball, karate and band. At 5, a child in ANY activity should be learning fundamentals and having fun, not showing off in 250 dollars worth of uniforms.

 

[fabumouse]

My DD 4-almost-5 participated in a Drama class this semester, where the grand finale was a stage production. By the end of the 10 weeks, all of the kids were feeling the pressure to perform even though the teacher was very low-key about the whole thing. Contrasted to her dance class, which has no recitals at all, and all of the kids look forward to attending each week, I think I'll stick with the non-competitive activities for now and let her compete when she's older.

Oh, and the costumes for the drama class were borrowed; dance class requires a $10 leotard.

 

[tommygirl79]

Thanks to everyone who has responded so far. I'm glad there are those that have the same reaction as I did. Since I asked this question, I called a couple of places that have tumbling/gymnastics classes that have summer sessions (less time commitment as the cheerleading would be for a solid year) and we can see how much she likes it.

Before lyeag even said it, I wondered the same thing about it being parents' trying to kind of live vicariously through there children things they would have liked to have done. I looked at myself, and I think that might have been my motivator. I didn't do cheerleading and wasn't really girly girl and maybe I was hoping she might be. But then I got to thinking about it. I was all-state in high school in softball and definitely knew the thrill of competition. However, it was a gradual progression from t-ball to minor league softball, then to all-star teams in the summer and then on to very competitive softball in high school. It just seems like there isn't any gradual development like that here - no time to "just" have fun. And looking around at the mothers of those that are going to do it - I have noticed one common thing - none of them were cheerleaders or athletes at all and maybe they are doing the same thing - maybe not. They are good friend of mine and I don't disapprove of full-time working moms even though I chose to stay at home with my own girls, but I do wonder if, since some of them have expressed guilt about not being home with their kids, they do this to kind of compensate for that guilt. (Not that they SHOULD feel guilt but I know that some do).

It's all very interesting. I think we will go the fun tumbling/gymnastics route for this summer and after a couple of years if she wants to take it more serious then we'll look into it.

 

[Fionasmommy]

At 5, I'd only allow it if the child really, really wanted to do it. They're going to need that desire to succeed in any program that requires so much dedication right off the bat.

 

[rbuzzotta]

At one point all 3 of my daughters were into competitive cheering. My oldest still competes. She is very committed. Her team just placed 8th at the cheerleading Worlds this past weekend in Disney. She began when she was in 5th grade!! She is now a freshman in hs and still loves it very much. It keeps her physically fit and busy!!! She also cheers for her high school football team in the fall!! She says that is just for fun!! Allstars are for competiting!!

My middle daughter competed only for one year. Due to back problems she was born with, it was in her best interest to stop. She decided this on her own but she enjoyed the year she had.

My youngest began cheering this year. This one is a natural athlete!!! She tumbles like crazy and only 7!! However, the pressure was just tooo much for her!! She could not take it anymore and cried going to and from practices. I removed her from the program!! She now just tumbles once a week and her skills have improved so much!! She enjoys cheering and we talked about her returning when she is in 5th or 6th grade if she wants. Until then, she can tumble like she is and having a blast!!

5 years old is young. The sport is very competitive and the pressure can be intense sometimes. It is a tough decision.............good luck!!

 

[Stacey2grls]

Ummm, very pricey I must say. The price of the uniform is the amount we pay around here, but hotel costs? And tryouts, at such a young age? We don't have tryouts here until Jr. Varsity. My oldest daughter started cheering at 5, but it wasn't nearly as involved as your daughters seems.