Coaxing a hesitant cruiser

[MagicallyMom]

I want to do a Halloween cruise in 2018 SO. BADLY. But my DD, age 6, saw a YouTube video that had convinced her that cruise ships are disasters waiting to lure her to an early demise.

Has anyone dealt with this before, and do you have advice for how to help my child relax and enjoy the fun? She's a very sensitive child.

 

[Quellman]

I'm sure with most kids, the answer varies. We have always talked up Disney at our house. A few months ago our three year old saw videos of sinking ships and the like. While a three year old is one to quickly forget things and easily be redirected I would hope that over a year away would still provide you many opportunities to change the mind of a little one.

At our sons age, letting him know that Mickey wouldn't put him on a bad ship worked well enough. Also, my son has sailed previously so going to the kids club this time was a big deal!

But for you, try figuring out what the root cause of the fear if possible. Then you can address it with other videos or counter information.

 

[iivye]

Show her the youtube videos of the Halloween cruises. Once she sees the other kids having fun and the characters she might get excited about the trip. I love the Halloween cruises.

 

[FigmentSpark]

I don't think you should push her. Find out if this is a real fear that will only get worse or a passing phase. You may have to see someone if it gets worse. You could start by taking a day tour, if your city has any lakes or islands or ferries. If not, swimming lessons and just being in the water might also help. Don't let her watch that sort of thing again, for sure. (I know I don't have to tell you that, lol!) Show her the commercials, once you've gotten her more comfortable with water. Disney marketing could get the most fearful kid wanting to try them out, IMO. Talk about what she saw and her fears and how safe a ship is. If you get her on the ship, before muster, make sure you have a conversation about it being just a practice, like the fire drills at school.

 

[Anchors Away 2016]

IMO, 18 months is three eternities in the life of a 6YO. I wouldn't even try to talk her into it right now. Just cut off her supply of disaster videos, and things will probably take care of themselves.

I realize you may want to book the cruise well in advance, and in a perfect world, you would want her to already be excited about it before you book, but in this case, I'd say go ahead and book it, and get good trip insurance so that you can cancel it if you must. Yes, you'd be out the cost of the insurance (and possibly a portion of the fare) but to me, that is a small risk since she will quite likely warm up to the idea eventually. Who knows. Maybe (probably) I'm naïve, but as I recall, 6 YO's had all sorts of little fears, most of which disappeared quickly.

 

[Rabb it]

Yeah, I would take the same tactic and show her awesome videos of peoples Disney cruises, there's lots on youtube. I watched a bunch with my girlfriend before our first cruise, they got us so pumped up.

 

[FigmentSpark]

My 7 year old had a friend who was afraid of a lot of things, including flying. One day, I was talking about an upcoming trip we had to visit grandma and he told me he was afraid of flying. I looked at him, processed what he'd heard from his friend and told him, "No, you're not afraid of flying. Emma is afraid of flying. You've flown plenty of times and have had a great time." He took it in stride and must have agreed with me, because he had no problem getting on the plane.

Now that was an unusual case and I wouldn't normally push a fear aside, but I knew this was something he was 'trying on' to see if it worked for him. My confidence in him and in flying helped him to agree that he didn't mind flying.

I also have to agree with the PP... she might be afraid now, but in 6 months, a year or more, and she might not even remember that she was afraid.

 

[oakleycat]

My son was 6 when he took his first cruise too and was very nervous about the ship sinking beforehand. Once he got on and saw how big it was and that it did not even seem like a "boat" inside he was fine. Now my boys watch youtube videos before every trip to get excited and plan their preferred activities, so that's a good way to go as well.

 

[RedSox68]

At age 9, my daughter was afraid to cruise because of the movie Titanic -- even though it was a Caribbean cruise, she was convinced icebergs would get us. We had talks with her, showed her pictures of the ship and rooms and Caribbean waters and she had a great time -- and the rest was cruising history since she's now done 15 of them LOL.

 

[scgustafson]

I was truly expecting this to be a thread about adults who are reluctant. That is what we are encountering in our family, those who automatically feel they will be seasick without ever having been on the water in any type of craft, nor having experienced motion sickness on other forms of transportation. This one person is keeping 21 other family members from having a family cruise.

 

[RedSox68]

I was truly expecting this to be a thread about adults who are reluctant. That is what we are encountering in our family, those who automatically feel they will be seasick without ever having been on the water in any type of craft, nor having experienced motion sickness on other forms of transportation. This one person is keeping 21 other family members from having a family cruise.

I had a co-worker who said she would never take a cruise simply because she thought she might panic if she couldn't see land 24/7!

 

[scgustafson]

I had a co-worker who said she would never take a cruise simply because she thought she might panic if she couldn't see land 24/7!

How does she ever go to sleep, go into a windowless room, or close her eyes for that matter?
Of course, with our going-to-be-seasick cruiser, it would be a self-fulfilling prophecy since she would think herself sick.

 

[cmph]

My eldest is sensitive and a worrier. She had no issues taking a warm weather cruise, but expressed concern about Alaska (which we're doing next year) b/c of the Titanic... fortunately she was 11 when she brought that up and we could address that very factually. 6 is kind of a different story, though. I think I would sit down exactly once, ask what video she saw (if you haven't already), and address her specific concerns. Did she watch something that showed a really old disaster completely preventable with modern technology and safety training? Easy enough to discuss. And then drop it, for a long time. Because the more you talk about stuff with a worrier, even if you are trying to tell them why NOT to worry - the more it's on their minds!!

And I would totally book the cruise, and in a year when it's getting close to PIF date - watch DCL promo videos together and look at Halloween trip report photos, without saying why - and see how she reacts.

 

[scgustafson]

If everyone is talking about the 1997 movie Titanic that is causing all of the issues with their children wanting to sail, I guess I am a bit taken back that kids that young are watching this PG-13 movie. But that is every parent's decision to make for their family, but had you known it would impact your ability to cruise, would you have kept them from watching it?

 

[jrabbit]

I was truly expecting this to be a thread about adults who are reluctant. That is what we are encountering in our family, those who automatically feel they will be seasick without ever having been on the water in any type of craft, nor having experienced motion sickness on other forms of transportation. This one person is keeping 21 other family members from having a family cruise.

This is easy for me as an outsider, and would probably have not done it myself - but just say "The rest of us are going on the cruise and are going to have a great time, You can figure out what you want to do while the rest of us are off on our adventure"

Not easy - especially if it's your kid or a beloved grandparent / relative that is reluctant to travel.

 

[Dug720]

This is easy for me as an outsider, and would probably have not done it myself - but just say "The rest of us are going on the cruise and are going to have a great time, You can figure out what you want to do while the rest of us are off on our adventure"

Not easy - especially if it's your kid or a beloved grandparent / relative that is reluctant to travel.

I'm with you.

 

[cmph]

If everyone is talking about the 1997 movie Titanic that is causing all of the issues with their children wanting to sail, I guess I am a bit taken back that kids that young are watching this PG-13 movie. But that is every parent's decision to make for their family, but had you known it would impact your ability to cruise, would you have kept them from watching it?

I was not referring to Titanic the movie in my post, if you are partially directing your post at me. My kids (8 and 12) have read and learned about the Titanic via history lessons, but have not seen the movie. I'm not even sure if they've heard of the movie.

 

[jrabbit]

If everyone is talking about the 1997 movie Titanic that is causing all of the issues with their children wanting to sail, I guess I am a bit taken back that kids that young are watching this PG-13 movie. But that is every parent's decision to make for their family, but had you known it would impact your ability to cruise, would you have kept them from watching it?

We are taking one of the East Coast / Canada sailings - and will NOT be visiting anything to do with the Titanic!! DW Knows what, why and how it happened but doesn't want to be reminded about it and then go back onto the ship. We also don't visit any of the Titanic museums.

Its one of "those fears" that sometimes is hard to talk yourself out of. On the other hand we have visited the Holocaust Museum in DC and have toured Germany ....

My advise to the OP
1) Book the Trip as soon as you are able too (the sooner the cheaper)
2) discuss the issue with DD once - soon, then drop the subject (like others have said)
3) don't tell DD that you have booked the cruise
4) go and have a great time

If you sense continued apprehension around PIF you can choose to cancel
If you decide to sail anyway, you can always "lie by omission" - depending upon how observant your child is she might not even realize that she is on a ship!! When checking in you can say that you are going to a special version of WDW (because DCL is part of Disney Parks Division, WDW specifically). OK so the muster drill will give it away ... and sorry I am beginning to chuckle to myself remembering what the A-Team did to Mr. T (B.A. Baracus) whenever they needed to fly.

 

[scgustafson]

I was not referring to Titanic the movie in my post, if you are partially directing your post at me. My kids (8 and 12) have read and learned about the Titanic via history lessons, but have not seen the movie. I'm not even sure if they've heard of the movie.

That is why I asked. My wife is a huge Titanic-phile (the disaster, not the movie) from well before the movie was released. My personal favorite Titanic-related movie is "A Night to Remember". We treat the 1997 movie as a historical drama and definitely not a documentary. As a Naval Officer and an engineer, I like to use the disaster as an example of how tragedy has made us much safer, especially 105+ years later.

 

[scgustafson]

This is easy for me as an outsider, and would probably have not done it myself - but just say "The rest of us are going on the cruise and are going to have a great time, You can figure out what you want to do while the rest of us are off on our adventure"

Not easy - especially if it's your kid or a beloved grandparent / relative that is reluctant to travel.

She has not kept my immediate family from cruising, nor would she ever. All she is doing is keeping my Aunt and Uncle from having the big family cruise they want to do with their 3 kids, their spouses, 9 grandchildren, and my parents from having a family cruise with us. My Aunt and Uncle really want the big family vacation as my Uncle has numerous health issues and won't be around for a long time, due to this, it is either all of the kids, spouses, and grandkids together or no one.