Christmas presents for same gender and one is a baby?

[AliciaS]

Hi helpful Dissers!

At Christmas-time my sons will be 4.5 years old and 16 months old. I have sooooo many ideas for the 4.5 year old and essentially none for the baby. I don't want to get the 16 month old more stuff just to get it. He has all of his brothers things to play with already and I am sure his Aunts will get him more. While he won't notice the inequity, the 4.5 year old might. Is it okay to get the baby a book, a shirt, and one toy and get the older one a bicycle, Leaspter games, a watch, etc.?

Also, do you get your children things for both of them? For instance, I'd like to get Ratatoulli and The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, but I don't want to just give them to the older boy. He's going to get enough. And wouldn't it be weird to give it just to the younger one who has no clue about DVDs? Would you suggest they come to the two of them from Santa or something?

Thanks!!

 

[jellybeans0607]

At that age we never got the baby much. I think maybe 2 things. The older kids understood that he was just a baby, and didnt want or need or even know as much.

Anything we get for all the kids wont be labeled as to who its for. It will just be a wrapped present. We do all gifts from Santa, mommy and daddy have never given any of our children a gift

To be honest I think you might be over thinking it a bit. But who hasn't

 

[Juliegirl1]

Honestly at that age (16 months) all they want to do is tear the paper and play with the boxes. I remember my son's second Christmas and he was just a little older he could have cared less what was in the boxes. I know for sure the baby won't notice a difference and the older one will just think he got more stuff if there is an unequal number of gifts. They don't really understand $$ values yet either so all they know is that they each got three presents. I certainly think combined presents are fun - perhaps you can ask the older child to let the younger one help him open it, even if it really is for the older child now the younger one will eventually want to watch the dvds. Have fun and don't stress - it's when they get older that you have to worry about the scorecards.

PS - a boy I used to date had seven siblings and his mom kept a notebook with everything they had ever received for Christmas and birthdays. She kept strict tabs on how much she spent and they got exactly whatever her budget was down to the penny - she would make it all even by putting penny candy in their stockings. If they wanted something that was out of her budget like an expensive electronic their whole gift would be a gift card to wherever they could purchase it and the siblings would also give gift cards to make up the difference. She even had a budget for the boyfriends and girlfriends and we never got junk or the same thing twice. I had fun looking through her notebook and seeing how the amounts of gifts went up through the years and what the kids all got each year.

 

[Bren's Mom]

You're right to not want to buy gifts for the sake of buying them. 2 things to consider; if they don't have college funds or they're not fully funded yet...add to them! The kids won't know if they've gotten 2 or 3 cheap gifts or 2 or 3 expensive gifts and they'll appreciate having those college funds later on! And also, maybe 1 larger 'joint' gift if your budget allows? Like a play kitchen or a tent for outside, swings or a see saw...something along those lines. You little one will grow into it.

 

[K and K's Mommy]

Santa has brought gifts that are for all three kids. It usually is a DVD that says, "to the (last name) children."

I know I am anal, but I make sure my kids have the same number of gifts. That does not mean they are the same price level. Last year the youngest got play food in two separate packages so he would have the same number. One time Santa brought diapers!!

 

[sndfan]

If you are looking for things for the 16 month old, there are a lot of inexpensive things that they could use...I would load up on books, bath toys, building blocks like the Mega Blocks...maybe some new teething toys and balls...just some ideas. Most of these things are great for stimulating the youngster, without breaking a budget.

 

[Luv Bunnies]

My boys have about the same age difference. Anything we buy that both of them can use are addressed to both. That way it doesn't really belong to either one of them and they can share. When the younger one was a baby, he got more functional gifts like clothes, shoes, books, etc. They really do just like to rip off the paper and aren't that concerned about what's inside. One thing we've always done is make sure each boy has the same number of presents to open. The baby's gifts might be smaller but we like to keep it equal. This really matters when the kids are older and they start counting the gifts under tree! My brother, sister and I were counters and my parents always made sure we had equal numbers. I guess their rule has rubbed off on me.

 

[laughinplace199]

I have a DD(9), a DS(7), and a DS(almost 2). The older two always get the same # of gifts. The baby doesn't get as many, as he's still pretty clueless. I saved a lot of the older kids' toys, so we don't need to buy lots of things for the baby. I'll buy him a few new toys and some books. Then I'll buy things I would have bought for him anyway, like new pj's, onesies, sippy cups, pacifiers, etc. and wrap those. Everybody's happy.

 

[Narnia]

I'd add a few cheap things that would make the baby seem like he hit the jackpot. favorite treats he doesn't get often due to cost/sugar( we all need treats once and a while).A small back pack I find is actaully the best gift at this age. toddlers love filling them up with odd thing they find and it's useful ( carring his own emergancy diapers). I don't think the baby will care if the older son gets more then him at this point.

 

[Colleen27]

We don't do much gift-giving for the first two Christmases, just one gift from Mom & Dad and one gift from each sibling. When DD was that age, she pretty much ignored her gifts to play with the torn-off wrapping paper anyway!

From the time DD was 2 and DS was 6, we kept things roughly even in terms of the number of gifts for our older two. But that's going to change fairly soon, as DS is getting to the age where he's asking for electronics instead of Legos. He's old enough to understand that when he's asking for a cell phone and PS3 games, he's not going to have as many packages to open as DD who is asking for Barbies and art/craft supplies.

 

[ChristusG]

You just wrote what I've been thinking for the past month LOL!

I have two DD's....DD#1 is 4.5 and DD#2 is 19 months (will be 21 months at Christmas time).

DD#2 doesnt care for "baby" toys any longer...she would rather play with big sister and her toys. I have a lot of ideas for DD#1 (princess leapster game, Playmobil, computer games) but DD#2 is too young for those things. We already have the usual things you would think of for an almost-2 year old....blocks, baby dolls, baby stroller, shopping carts, etc. So I'm at a loss!!!! I cannot just get her nothing when she will see big sister opening gifts. She is very observant and WILL understand that big sister is opening something fun and she is not. Yet, like you, I dont want to buy toys just for the sake of buying them....because I know they will not be used. So I dont know what to do either.

 

[AliciaS]

Thanks everyone! You have some great ideas. And of course, the toy catalogs have just started arriving in the mail so now I have even MORE ideas for DS#1. I WILL control myself, however

I like the idea of giving the videos to both of them. While the younger one will be clueless, the older one will be excited for them both. I'm thinking of giving any Thomas stuff or Legos (Duplos, really) or blocks to the younger one so that they get mixed in with the ones the older one thinks of as his. They're all in the play room and he needs to get over the idea that toys like these are his just because he got them first. And as long as he has a few things to play with, he'll be oblivious....I think.

Even beyond Christmas, it's just a general problem of what to get the second kid when you 1) don't want to add to the level of stuff in the house and 2) already have pretty much every category of toy covered. I guess as they get older they have different tastes and interests. I can already see that DS#2 really likes music and animals in ways that DS#1 didn't. I can play that up and buy a couple items in that vein, even though we already have a basket full of instruments!

Thanks again and good luck ChristusG! We'll figure it out!

And of course everyone's getting Disney Dollars in their stockings. That's an easy one!

 

[nannerbadnanner]

Maybe do a small toy for each and then an experience they can share like a zoo membership or tickets to Disney on Ice.