Childrens and Funerals

[my3kids]

If it is someone close to them, they go.

 

[newholiday]

DS was at his grandfathers wake & funeral when he was 2
He was at his other grandfathers wake & funeral when he was 4

 

[tkd lisa]

For close family members, we would all go, regardless of age. My DD attended her first viewing at about 4 months of age. It was the brother of her babysitter who lived with the babysitter. We took DD mainly so that the babysitter could give her a hug (which babysitter badly needed). But I had a close family friend who died at about that same time, and I didn't take DD (no connection to DD).

Both kids went to the funeral of their great grandmother when they were 6 and 8, but didn't go to the viewing (it was about 3 hours long, and I thought they would be bored, and be disruptive).

 

[browneyes]

The first funeral my dd went to, was her granny's when my dd was a year and a half old. The first funeral my ds went to was for a friend of mine's dad (her dad was like a dad to me). My ds was 2 yo. I don't let them touch the ones we visit, I don't like to touch the ones we visit. They don't seem traumatized by any of the funerals they've attended.

The first funeral I went to was for a 3rd cousin of mine. I was 7 yo. She was only 12 or 13 yo. I was a little traumatized at the funeral home. Women around me went into details about what the funeral people did to her. Graphic details.

 

[s&k'smom]

Wow what an interesting thread. When my niece passed all the kids went. We had 3 baby carseats lined up and let her cousins mingle with the adults, it was actually very healing. We laughed at the kids, cried with my sister. Saw old friends and really made it a very special time to remember her.

 

[caitycaity]

in my family generally kids of all ages go. we've never had an open casket or anything like that though, so....

 

[CourtasanSatine]

my first funeral was for my dad when I was 16 and I took it too hard.To this day I can't go into a graveyard for any reason and I think it's due to not having gone to ne when the person was less closer than a parent.I did go to one for a HS classmate father to offer her support(she was part of my circle of friends) and handed that one ok.IMO it should start before the child loses someone really close

 

[KarenC]

My grandpa died pretty unexpectedly when I was five. I didn't go to the funeral or to the wake. I had a real hard time accepting and dealing with his death (he lived next door and we spent our days following him around). Sometimes I think it would have been better if I'd had the opportunity to say goodbye.

My dad died when my littlest niece was 3. Her mother is a pediatrician. My niece attended the wake and the funeral. For a while she talked about the time papa was lying in church and we said goodbye to him. It didn't seem to harm her in anyway.

My poor kids have been to too many funerals...both my grandmas, my dad and my husband's dad...but I think as long as they can behave, and if the person who died is important in their lives, they should be able to be part of the grieving process.