Children calling constantly?

[me again]

Both my children have given out our home phone number to their friends (although they were told to just give out their cell number). Well, their friends call constantly, and I mean constantly. They call, get voice notes, hang up, then call immediately again. They will do this 5-6 times in a row, seems they figure we will pick up if they keep calling.

Well, my dh uses the home phone for business and the call waiting interrupt is just about to drive him crazy! Obviously we could get another phone number but that would result in a major inconvenience to us. We've spoken with the children involved, and their parents, aksing them (politely) to just use the cell phone number, we even had cards printed for each child with their cell number, a cute picture, and a nice reminder--"please call this number" the kids passed them out to their friends, doesn't matter, they still keep calling our home number over and over. Its really becoming a hardship for dh, who does about 30-40% of his work from home, to have his business calls constantly interrupted with some kid calling. If we ignore the call waiting beep, it defaults to voice notes, that's what its there for--either we're not home or can't pick up the call--duh! so the kids just call over and over, the call waiting beep is a constant in the background while dh is trying to conduct business. Also, it kept interrupting me the other day when I was trying to refill a perscription that was done by touch tone, I literally couldn't complete the transaction due to the constant call-waiting interrupt that I could tell from caller ID was from one of their friends.

I've taught my kids better phone manners than that, you call once, leave a message, then don't call again--don't make a constant pain of yourself until someone answers!

Well, its a real problem for dh. I guess the only other option is either change our phone number, which results in major confusion for us, or get a second line installed, which is another expense. Either that or discontinue the call waiting feature, which is something we need depending on the circumstances. I wish there was some way we could disable the call waiting feature on a per call basis, but that option is only available if we make the call. If we receive a call we can't disconnect call waiting, so we're at the mercy of whatever kid wants to make a game out of calling our number over and over. A few times it got so bad that dh actually had to hang up and call the other party back, so he could disconnect the call waiting feature for that call.

Any suggestions? I'm about ready to tear my hair out with the phone situation!

 

[annie1995]

OMGosh, I know exactly where you are coming from. My step daughters boyfriend will do that. He called 17 times in 2 hours before. I don't know how to stop it, but gosh your not alone. I have nothing to offer but a understanding shoulder to complain on.

 

[alikat99]

Is it just a few kids that keep calling that number? If so, some phone companies have a call block feature that will allow you to block specific phone numbers from calling you. Maybe if you did that for a while, it would force those children that think its easier to call your house (probably because that's the number that's been memorized), to call the kids' cell phones instead. Just a thought.

 

[me again]

Our phone service doesn't have call blocker, maybe it would be a good step to switch to a company that does (and hopefully has better rates) so we could keep the same number.

DH had an important business call a few days ago, the call waiting simply wouldn't stop, I swear, this kids must have had us on speed dial and hit it as soon as he hung up. Finally, dh put his important call on hold (the call was from China!) and spoke with the child, told him that ds couldn't come to the phone, please call back at the cell number, which he gave him) then when he went to pick up the original call it had been disconnected, couldn't reconnect it because every time dh tried to call he got another call waiting interrupt from the same kid who had just been told not to call that number! Finally the call was completed, but the guy dh was speaking with wasn't there, had to speak with someone else, the matter being discussed took several days to complete due to the call interruption. And that kid still calls here a zillion times a minute! We spoke with the parents, who seemed insulted that we would even mention such a thing--they said "he's just a child" Well, their "child" is 12 years old, if he's old enough to use the phone he's old enough to have some phone manners!

I'm beginning to think the only thing to do is get another phone number and guard who its given out to. That creates major confusion with people trying to get ahold of us, we can't put a recording in with the new number, for obvious reasons. We can email all our contacts with our new number, but that type of information has a way of not getting through to people's files. Just today I'm about half-crazy with the phone ringing all the time, finally took it off the hook. So, I'm paying for a phone I can't use?

 

[MiniGirl]

If you cannot block the calls and you have already spoken to the parents and children involved, I don't know what else you can do.

I feel your pain though. My oldest is only 7, but her best friend has called here over 20 times today. She'll call, tell my dd something, hang up, and call back a minute later. Finally, I told my dd that her friend simply could not keep calling here. I really don't mind them talking, but, sheesh, the one sentence per call thing was giving me a headache.

Of course, in my situation the girls are young enough that I can be mean and tell her not to call here and she'll listen to me.

Good luck to you. I dunno though. Send the kids a bill for lost business due to their calling. Maybe explain that they aren't calling your home as much as they are calling your dh's office. Hope it all works out.

 

[Beth E. (NJ)]

The next time the child calls I would speak to the child a little more harshly. If you have spoken to the child already and to the parents than I think that would be the next step. Be very to the point.

Do not call this number more than 1 time. You are interrupting my business. If we do not answer, leave a message.

 

[me again]

Well, I can either stew about it or just get another phone number. Getting another phone number will create a lot of confusion at first with business/personal contacts we have, because we won't have a forwarding message with the new number (or the kids will just call that, right back to where we started from).

We would like to notify all our contacts that we will have a new phone number, at least a weekin advance of the change, but it doesn't work that way--a new number is assigned instantly, then people call, can't reach us, there's a lag that we can notify them of the new number, probably by email, or geez! What a headache!

I'm seriously thinking of calling those kids who call us over and over, just to let them see what a problem it creates! Or have my kids call every 5 seconds, then when the parents complain say "they're just children".

Either that or get a second line, then phase our new number over to the contacts we want to keep, then shut down the first line, maybe a month or two of transition, use the second line for business calls, be very careful who we give that number out to!

 

[Princess Roo]

I don't have older children yet, so maybe this is out of line, but my first thought is to "ground" your children from seeing those children outside of school until they can stop calling. Like, give them a week to get the word out to their friends, but that if they call the home number (or call it repeatedly, or whatever you specifically NEED to end) that your child will not be allowed to have that friend over or go to that friend's house for a certain amount of time. I realize it is the other child's poor behavior, but sometimes it takes peer pressure to stop things (and your child gave out the number they weren't supposed to in the first place to get you in this mess)!

 

[Amy5000]

I don't have the problem of children calling the house, but I have worked from home on and off for many years and I'll tell you....I have never had call waiting on my business line. My advice:

Get Rid of Call Waiting. You really don't need it most of the time. Your family will leave messages and not behave like the obnoxious child who kept calling. If my line was busy my family knows to call my cell, leave a message, or send me an email. My friends would do the same.

Do you really feel like you need call waiting? Do you have cell phones so you can make a call if someone's on the line. It's seems like the call waiting is more for the benefit of your children's friends than yours.

Good luck. Amy

 

[me again]

I don't have the problem of children calling the house, but I have worked from home on and off for many years and I'll tell you....I have never had call waiting on my business line. My advice:

Get Rid of Call Waiting. You really don't need it most of the time. Your family will leave messages and not behave like the obnoxious child who kept calling. If my line was busy my family knows to call my cell, leave a message, or send me an email. My friends would do the same.

Do you really feel like you need call waiting? Do you have cell phones so you can make a call if someone's on the line. It's seems like the call waiting is more for the benefit of your children's friends than yours.

Good luck. Amy

Our home phone was just that, our home phone, and call waiting had certain advantages. DH just recently started a new job that involves some work from home, so he uses the home phone. Its not a business phone, or am I being as clear as mud

This business of kids calling our home phone has been going on for quite some time, but we didn't want to get a new phone number whild dh was job hunting, the transition could have cost him a job lead! But now that he's landed his job, our phone has new uses. So I think the best thing to do is get a second line and number just for business, keep the old line for awhile, until we can notify people of our new number, then cancel that number. DH really doesn't runa business from home, just the ocassional call that doesn't need to be interrupted. Like calls to China! And for the new phone don't get call waiting, use our cell phones for emergency contacts, anything else can just wait.

What bugs me more than anything about this whole mess is that these kids parents just don't seem to realize/understand what a headache this is creating for us. I really, really don't want to lose friends for my children, its not their fault they keep calling here constantly (yes, they gave out that number, but they're not responsible for their bad phone manners). It might just be an annoying kid to us, but its a friend for them, so I don't want to get too heavy with their parents (have spoken with them once, doubt any more would do any good). I really think just getting another phone is the only real answer to this whole mess.

 

[*KeepMovingForward*]

What bugs me more than anything about this whole mess is that these kids parents just don't seem to realize/understand what a headache this is creating for us. I really, really don't want to lose friends for my children, its not their fault they keep calling here constantly (yes, they gave out that number, but they're not responsible for their bad phone manners). It might just be an annoying kid to us, but its a friend for them, so I don't want to get too heavy with their parents (have spoken with them once, doubt any more would do any good). I really think just getting another phone is the only real answer to this whole mess.

I bet these parents don't realize that their kids are still calling your home number-or calling it so much. I don't stand over my kids when they call their friends, but then again, if I got a complaint from a parent, maybe I would be monitoring-if I could (barring being at work while they are home).

I guess I should thank my lucky stars that my teens don't give out our number-their friends are all about the computer IM. Nobody waking us, calling all day or calling too late at night. I have computer tracker on their computers, so I get a log of everything...so no real worries on that front either.

I do a majority of my business from home, but I use my cell phone-only because I don't want a client calling me on my home phone...on the weekend...or late at night. Yes, even adults can be guilty of terrible phone etiquette. I've had clients call me at 11pm to ask about color,fabric or furniture selection or something else non-emergent. Now I just shut my phone off after normal business hours-they leave a message. Anyway, maybe that would be an option for DH. Of course the constant stream of calls would still be an issue for you regardless, so I guess short of waiting it out (and hoping the call frenzy passes), then maybe a 2nd line would be the best answer.

 

[Girly_Qs]

Okay, I can't say exactly what *I* would do in this situation, as my LO's don't use the phone yet . . .

Maybe I just had "mean" parents (I don't think so, we've always gotten along well and they're now my best friends besides dh!) - but, my parents would've tried the usual tactics at first (speaking to my friends when they called, speaking directly to their parents, etc). Then, if all else failed - it would've been *my* responsibility (as they were *my* friends) - either I convinced them to stop calling like that, or *I* would've lost priveledges and/or ended up grounded (nowadays, it would've meant loss of ALL communication priveledges - home phone, cell, IM, email, etc).

Harsh, perhaps. But the situation sounds beyond out of control - y'all can only be expected to put up with so much before this stops! And, I hope it does - soon!

 

[northriver]

Can you get another cell phone for you husband to use for business? You would still have the regular landline as a backup until his customers all got the new number.

I have a teenager and we do not have a landline. I have my cell and he has his. I LOVE not having a landline.

 

[DVCLiz]

There's a simple solution to this problem, and it's this -

Make your kids responsible for these calls. Tell them their friends calling the house number has gotten to be a problem, and that you would like them to tell their friends to call the cell phone numbers only. Have them do this ONCE to the friends who call the house phone. When those kids disobey, punish YOUR children.

Those kids aren't going to listen to you if there are no consequences, and your kids aren't going to be very forceful with their friends if all you do is get mad and then talk about it on the internet. Put the responsibility for their friends' behavior on your kids - when they start missing privileges and being made to do extra chores or lose fun things, they will become remarkably clear with their friends.

I'd try that for a day or two and I'll bet you see fantastic results.

 

[dfarner]

There's a simple solution to this problem, and it's this -

Make your kids responsible for these calls. Tell them their friends calling the house number has gotten to be a problem, and that you would like them to tell their friends to call the cell phone numbers only. Have them do this ONCE to the friends who call the house phone. When those kids disobey, punish YOUR children.

Those kids aren't going to listen to you if there are no consequences, and your kids aren't going to be very forceful with their friends if all you do is get mad and then talk about it on the internet. Put the responsibility for their friends' behavior on your kids - when they start missing privileges and being made to do extra chores or lose fun things, they will become remarkably clear with their friends.



I'd try that for a day or two and I'll bet you see fantastic results.

I agree. You are having a headache over this because your kids did what you told them not to do, which was give out your phone number. Other people's kids are not going to listen to you. It is your kids' responsiblity to deal with it. If they are old enough to have their own cell phones then they are old enough to fix the problem. IMO I would tell them that since there has been so much activity on the home phone there seems to be no reason to have personal cell phones and you and DH are thinking of disconnecting the cells until the problem gets resolved.

 

[Grendalynn]

I am one of 5 girls... you can imagine what our house was like as a kid - my parents had strict rules - no calls before 9am and no calls after 8 pm. no calls during dinner,and or family functions. We were taught phone manners and if we had long distanst calls to make - it came out of our allowance. this was waay before cell phones and call waiting. We finally got our own line - the kids line and it was strictly monitired by my parents. Once the friends know your phone rules, they should be able to follow them, otherwise your kids may not be allowed to use the phone... just some food for thought!!

 

[me again]

I really think the most effective way out of this mess is to get a second line for dh to use for business, both personal and job-related, then guard that number carefully. A cell phone would not be as practical, because we have unlimited long distance with our carrier (time-warner cable). I think I'll just get another whole new line and number, notify people we want to maintain contact with of the new number, and gradually phase out the old line.

Oh, I agree the kids are partly responsible for this mess (they were told not to give out that number), but regardless of how much we get on their case to stop their friends annoying phone habits it will still continue, perhaps slow down, but continue. Right now I'm more interested in a solution to this problem rather than consequences for the kids, etc. We just need a phone we can use!

 

[Fairy Godmother]

Does your phone compay offer Cancel Call Waiting? With it you can disable call waiting on important phone calls.

 

[sskem96]

I think when DH answers the phone, he should answer using the business name. When the caller asks for one of the children, he could say, "I'm sorry, this is a business line. (Child's name) can be reached on her cell phone. Thank you. Goodbye."

Since they've already been told not to call that number, it needs to be enforced that they won't be able to reach your children at all by calling that number.

 

[mariettadisney71]

ME AGAIN,

I work for a phone company and if the feature is added to your line you'll have the ability to disable it for your calls that you do not want to be interrupted on. With our company if you press *70 before your call, it will turn off call waiting until you hang up (you can also do it durning the call). If you want to PM your phone company's name, I'll see if I can help with it.