Can't do it!

[Tiger926]

It is the fact he doesn't want to go to Disney that makes me think where they stay does matter. This is not a vacation he enjoys but he is willing to go to make his family happy. He thinks staying at the WL will make the vacation better but the OP doesn't want to make him happy over $900.

If that $900 would break them financially then I can see the OP worrying about it but it doesn't sound like they can't afford it.

The husband has already compromised by agreeing to the trip, even though he doesn't like it. The OP should compromise over their accommodations.

But, he doesn't like Disney, so what if the extra $900.00 still won't make him happy? What about it will make him more happy? We've all read trip reports of indulging a spouse to the tune of club level, and they still didn't care for the trip. I really don't think a resort stay is going to sway him one way or the other, but only OP knows her hubby best.

I don't think soccer mom is saying that he makes the money so he should get to decide, but he should at least be able to make some of the choices. I would imagine that if they stay at WL and work in some resort time, the husband might feel differently about a Disney vacation.

To some people $900 is an enormous amount of money. Why accuse OP of not wanting to make her DH happy? I think just the opposite. She is considering spending an extra $900 just to make him happy.

My DH is much less frugal than I am so I can sympathize.

$900.00 is a lot of money - I could stay many extra days at Disney for that, or buy 2 DVC APs for the entire year with that money. It's still a big decision, even if they can afford it, IMHO. I think working in some resort time might be good, but they can do that at a Moderate too.r

I just don't get why people are equating OP's love for her hubby, with what resort they do or don't stay at? Maybe she wants to save that money to do something else at Disney, or, maybe she wants to put it towards bills, as she knows her hubby may not be happy with that resort either?

I personally think both FQ and POR are much nicer, better location, better food choice, closer to DTD than AK. I would never pay more for AK, infact I would pay the 600$ to stay at either of these over AK.

I would say I would have a hard time, if I was the one always saving to indulge the extra. It would depend if he ever wants upgrades, or is this is the only 1. If usually you make all the rules/upgrades, and you can afford it 100% I would. If he is always upgrading while your cutting back.. nope.

to the indulging part, although even if we could afford it, I still wouldn't spend $900.00 more, as I know the resort wouldn't be worth that much more money for us. But, we have stayed pretty much everywhere, in different rooms, so I have lots to compare, whereas OP and hubby may not. So, I think this is why OP posted in the first place, as she probably truly is at odds with this.

Tiger

 

[ilovemk76]

Let me explain. I am the frugal one in the family. I pay the bills, cut coupons, wear ratty old clothes so my kiddos can have new, etc. We are doing well for a single income family, but I still watch every dime like a hawk. We have not had a true vacation since Disney in 2007 (other than spending a week with family in other states--staying for free, eating at relatives' homes, only paying airfare), except for weekends here and there at the local beach.

SO DH has agreed to another Disney trip this fall, but he wants to stay at Wilderness Lodge and treat ourselves. BUT IT IS $900 MORE than the moderate package!!!! I know a lot of women would love for their husbands to want that, but it feels so wasteful to me, especially since our last trip at Port Orleans was wonderful, and we were barely in our room. So should I bite the bullet and treat him (he really does not like Disney and only does it for the kids), or save the cash???
I swear, even if we won the lottery tomorrow, I would never lose these frugal ways!

It is all of your vacation, including your DH. He has not had a vacation in four years but you don't want to consider his input. He is going where you want but he can't stay where he want? You sad you want to save the cash not that you could not afford it. Maybe he wants to spend more time at the resort. The WL is a nice place to stay at.

okay,
so I called again this morning to change weeks and now animal kingdom is coming out only 600 more than Riverside (dixie landings to me!)

is akl worth the long bus rides?

Why are you looking at the AKL when your DH wants to stay at the WL?

 

[MrsPete]

If I were going on a different vacation -- say, a week in an oceanfront condo or a weekend at the lake -- I'd be willing to pay for the nicer accomodations. On those kind of trips I'd expect that we'd cook big family meals, linger in the living room or the balcony playing games and talking. In those circumtances, I'd gladly pay $900 more for a larger, nicer place.

Not at Disney. We go to Disney for the parks. I don't want to pay $$$$ for a nicer room in which I won't be spending much time. I value the on-site Disney rooms because the transportation is so convenient, but -- like the OP -- I'm frugal and am careful about where I spend.

For your upcoming trip, I'd consider the more expensive hotel ONLY IF your husband doesn't intend to go to the parks every day. If he's anticipating waking to see you off to the parks, then he wants to lounge around the pool, then I'd get the nicer place.

 

[punkin]

It is all of your vacation, including your DH. He has not had a vacation in four years but you don't want to consider his input. He is going where you want but he can't stay where he want? You sad you want to save the cash not that you could not afford it. Maybe he wants to spend more time at the resort. The WL is a nice place to stay at.

Why are you looking at the AKL when your DH wants to stay at the WL?

Where do you people get this from the OP? She is considering his input. She is also trying to come up with a compromise despite her opinion that this is a waste of money. That's the way marriage should work.

 

[Tiger926]

If I were going on a different vacation -- say, a week in an oceanfront condo or a weekend at the lake -- I'd be willing to pay for the nicer accomodations. On those kind of trips I'd expect that we'd cook big family meals, linger in the living room or the balcony playing games and talking. In those circumtances, I'd gladly pay $900 more for a larger, nicer place.

Not at Disney. We go to Disney for the parks. I don't want to pay $$$$ for a nicer room in which I won't be spending much time. I value the on-site Disney rooms because the transportation is so convenient, but -- like the OP -- I'm frugal and am careful about where I spend.

For your upcoming trip, I'd consider the more expensive hotel ONLY IF your husband doesn't intend to go to the parks every day. If he's anticipating waking to see you off to the parks, then he wants to lounge around the pool, then I'd get the nicer place.

Good point. If he doesn't want to go to parks, then this might be an important resort decision, but again, you can still have lots of relaxing times at Moderates too. They aren't that far off from Deluxe resorts, IMHO. This is why we bought DVC - we spend time at the resorts, and we enjoy cooking and laundry, so it was a good decision for us. Not sure how long OP is going for, but maybe that is why she is considering the change as well?

Where do you people get this from the OP? She is considering his input. She is also trying to come up with a compromise despite her opinion that this is a waste of money. That's the way marriage should work.

I don't understand it either...? Tiger

 

[lonegirl]

OP here. Goodness, this one took on a life of it's own! I have a wonderful husband who does "bring home the bacon" while I stay at home with our kids. I have always been a good steward of our money, as if I am not making any, I feel it is my job to save/bargain/budget.

In regards to this trip, yes we can afford the $900 more. Is there always a smarter, more responsible thing to do with cash than spend it on a vacation? Sure.

I am not disregarding DH's desires (not demands). I am not disrespecting him at all (made me laugh, because we are a very traditional-role family) It is because of him that we have the nice things that we have, because I would never buy those things, but then I am glad we have them. We are Dave Ramsey-ers, we save, we are smart, it just seems so indulgent!!!!

I grew up at Disney every 3-4 years, he and I went without kids and stayed at Riverside in 1997, then went back in 2007 to POFQ. Both times we went to see Wilderness Lodge and he loved it. Last time we ate at Boma and he liked AKL as well. We are supposed to decide tonight, so I will let yall know. Also, this is a December trip, so the WL does seem magical with the decorations, and the boat ride to Magic Kingdom. I guess I am talking myself into it!

Also, if we do this trip, next year we will do a local road trip in Texas with 3-4 nights for our big trip... We do not indulge every year at all.

Thanks for the input. That's why I love these boards.

 

[GinnyEmma]

So, how would you all respond to a poster who posted that they aren't really into disney, but are taking the trip and spending the money because their wife and kids love it. Really all you'd like is to stay at AKL and enjoy that resort for the trip.

Frankly, I'd be saying that the person is a sweetie for taking the trip with the family when it isn't their thing, and to talk again with the spouse. It seems pretty easy to me. There is always something else that can be done with out money. He ought to get a say in that decision.

eta: it has nothing to do with traditional roles and everything to do with being a team, imo.

 

[timmac]

I you answered your own question. Isn't it worth the extra money to ensure that he has an opportunity to enjoy the vacation as much as you and the kids do?

This!

If your DH isn't a big fan of Disney, and staying at WL is something he really wants to do, I don't see a reason not to. A WDW vacation is a splurge in and of itself... only seems fair to do some splurging for your DH as part of it.

 

[Tiger926]

OP here. Goodness, this one took on a life of it's own! I have a wonderful husband who does "bring home the bacon" while I stay at home with our kids. I have always been a good steward of our money, as if I am not making any, I feel it is my job to save/bargain/budget.

In regards to this trip, yes we can afford the $900 more. Is there always a smarter, more responsible thing to do with cash than spend it on a vacation? Sure.

I am not disregarding DH's desires (not demands). I am not disrespecting him at all (made me laugh, because we are a very traditional-role family) It is because of him that we have the nice things that we have, because I would never buy those things, but then I am glad we have them. We are Dave Ramsey-ers, we save, we are smart, it just seems so indulgent!!!!

I grew up at Disney every 3-4 years, he and I went without kids and stayed at Riverside in 1997, then went back in 2007 to POFQ. Both times we went to see Wilderness Lodge and he loved it. Last time we ate at Boma and he liked AKL as well. We are supposed to decide tonight, so I will let yall know. Also, this is a December trip, so the WL does seem magical with the decorations, and the boat ride to Magic Kingdom. I guess I am talking myself into it!

Also, if we do this trip, next year we will do a local road trip in Texas with 3-4 nights for our big trip... We do not indulge every year at all.

Thanks for the input. That's why I love these boards.

Thanks for the update! I am sorry you feel you have to explain yourself to any of us, as that is not necessary...People make assumptions based on limited info, but at least you got some good opinions on here!

It sounds like you and hubby have been to WDW several times, so you know the resorts, so that will be important for factoring into your decision. Hopefully, you have a great conversation tonight, and can decide on your resort, and I hope you both feel ok with whatever resort is chosen.

I wish you a wonderful trip, Tiger

 

[Cin]

How about a split stay? Price out a vacation with a stay at his choice of resorts and then price out one with a split staying the majority of nights at a value and then the last 2 nights at the deluxe. Let him see the numbers in black and white and decide. If he still decides to splurge, then go out and treat yourself to a vacation wardrobe and have a great time on your trip!

 

[sydneysmom]

Only you can decide what's right for your and your family. I'm also very frugal....we don't use credit cards, we clip coupons, we're on a budget...etc. That being said, when we refinanced our house, it saved us $ 150 / month. We decided to put that in a vacation savings account since "we already didn't miss that money" since it had been going towards the mortgage. So this way, when we are ready for our trip, we CAN splurge and not feel guilty. Trips are special and for us, we don't go to Disney every year.

My DH really wanted to stay at GF on our last trip..... I thought we should do something less expensive. Well, we stayed at the GF and LOVED it. ( I have stayed at POR in the past and absolutely loved it) We really liked being close to MK, having a balcony to sit out at night , loved having the sit down restaurants, loved being on the monorail....

If you can do it, I would do it in a second. And WL is just beautiful !!

 

[Marionnette]

OP here. Goodness, this one took on a life of it's own! I have a wonderful husband who does "bring home the bacon" while I stay at home with our kids. I have always been a good steward of our money, as if I am not making any, I feel it is my job to save/bargain/budget.

In regards to this trip, yes we can afford the $900 more. Is there always a smarter, more responsible thing to do with cash than spend it on a vacation? Sure.

I am not disregarding DH's desires (not demands). I am not disrespecting him at all (made me laugh, because we are a very traditional-role family) It is because of him that we have the nice things that we have, because I would never buy those things, but then I am glad we have them. We are Dave Ramsey-ers, we save, we are smart, it just seems so indulgent!!!!

I grew up at Disney every 3-4 years, he and I went without kids and stayed at Riverside in 1997, then went back in 2007 to POFQ. Both times we went to see Wilderness Lodge and he loved it. Last time we ate at Boma and he liked AKL as well. We are supposed to decide tonight, so I will let yall know. Also, this is a December trip, so the WL does seem magical with the decorations, and the boat ride to Magic Kingdom. I guess I am talking myself into it!

Also, if we do this trip, next year we will do a local road trip in Texas with 3-4 nights for our big trip... We do not indulge every year at all.

Thanks for the input. That's why I love these boards.

I'm all in favor of saving a dollar where you can. But I think that you need to examine your reasons for couponing, wearing ratty clothes and being super frugal in general. Many people do these things because they have no other choices. They have to do it in order make ends meet. But there are some who do it just beause they cannot give themselves permission to spend money even when they have it.

Money only serves one purpose. It is a means to obtain the things we need and want. Anything above our basic needs is a want and we all prioritize those wants. It sounds like a Disney vacation is a want that you're willing to spend money on. But a Disney vacation in a deluxe resort is not as high on your list as it is on your husband's. So ask yourself this, "If I don't spend that extra $900 on staying at the Wilderness Lodge, where will I spend that money?" Because one way or another, it's eventually going to get spent...college tuitions? new carpets? retirement fund? an inheritence for the kids? And will spending the money on that other expense bring you and your husband as much happiness and satisfaction as the vacation would.

It has taken my husband and me a long time to allow ourselves "permission" to spend. Heck, the man pulls down 6 figures and wore undershirts with holes in them rather than throw them! We both grew up in lower middle class families and it's a tough mentality to break. But we came to the realization that there are benefits to working hard, handling our money responsibly and giving back to the community. So, we stay at the deluxes when we vacation, we eat in the nicer restaurants if we want to and we add hopping to our tickets because that's a feature that we like to have. I still try to get all of those things at the best possible price that I can, but I no longer feel that I have to be frugal all of the time - especially when I'm on vacation.

 

[DSNY4ever]

I haven't read the other posts, but I think we have the same husband! Haha, except mine loves Disney, he just wants to step it up to the Wilderness lodge on our next trip and I have a hard time looking at the price difference too.

Have you looked into renting DVC points? That is what I am looking at to try and get this out of his system. We can't afford the regular price there, but we could do it if we rent points at least for part of the trip. I know what you mean about not being in the room, because we never are either, but I think if we were staying somewhere like that I would have to designate more time to enjoy the hotel and make it worth it.

We haven't been since 2008, but I am really hoping we can go sometime in 2013. Good luck!

 

[figment52]

okay,
so I called again this morning to change weeks and now animal kingdom is coming out only 600 more than Riverside (dixie landings to me!)

is akl worth the long bus rides?

ABSOLUTELY! IT is so cool to just walk out on the patio and see the animals "in your backyard". It is like having your own private zoo. And you get an immersion in the African culture too. At WL you get a feel for the National Parks (and quiet solitude).

WL and AKL are my favorite places to stay because they transport me to an entirely different place than the parks and to me it seems like I get two different vacations - the hectic parks and the calming, beautiful, lodges.

 

[SamSam]

ABSOLUTELY! IT is so cool to just walk out on the patio and see the animals "in your backyard". It is like having your own private zoo. And you get an immersion in the African culture too. At WL you get a feel for the National Parks (and quite solitude).

WL and AKL are my favorite places to stay because they transport me to an entirely different place than the parks and to me it seems like I get two different vacations - the hectic parks and the calming, beautiful, lodges.

Completely agree with this. As far as the buses at AKL, we've never had a problem with them. AKL is so beautiful and has so much to offer all on it's own, that I think your DH really might like staying there.
We have stayed at Riverside, AKL, and WL (also others), so I am familiar with each of your choices. Like others have said, if the extra $$ to stay at WL or AKL doesn't 'break the bank', go for it. I really don't think you will regret it.

 

[Lisa71]

Life is short and WL is gorgeous. We stayed there and loved it. I say do it..make a big deal of the "once in a lifetime" factor and then stay cheaper next time. It is the cheapest deluxe and a wonderful resort. Enjoy it, every minute, and plan on a cheaper one next time. Also, enjoy the treat!!

 

[sk!mom]

Let me explain. I am the frugal one in the family. I pay the bills, cut coupons, wear ratty old clothes so my kiddos can have new, etc. We are doing well for a single income family, but I still watch every dime like a hawk. We have not had a true vacation since Disney in 2007 (other than spending a week with family in other states--staying for free, eating at relatives' homes, only paying airfare), except for weekends here and there at the local beach.

SO DH has agreed to another Disney trip this fall, but he wants to stay at Wilderness Lodge and treat ourselves. BUT IT IS $900 MORE than the moderate package!!!! I know a lot of women would love for their husbands to want that, but it feels so wasteful to me, especially since our last trip at Port Orleans was wonderful, and we were barely in our room. So should I bite the bullet and treat him (he really does not like Disney and only does it for the kids), or save the cash???
I swear, even if we won the lottery tomorrow, I would never lose these frugal ways!

I can answer this completely honestly because it just happened. We stayed at Wilderness Lodge last week because my DH wanted to. He feels like the Deluxe resorts are so much more relaxing.

If you can afford it then I would honor his wish. It's a great resort and if it makes him happy, then it's a win win.

 

[GinnyEmma]

I can answer this completely honestly because it just happened. We stayed at Wilderness Lodge last week because my DH wanted to. He feels like the Deluxe resorts are so much more relaxing.

If you can afford it then I would honor his wish. It's a great resort and if it makes him happy, then it's a win win.

Yes. It is a part of the give and take in life and in relationships.

 

[ilovejack02]

I you answered your own question. Isn't it worth the extra money to ensure that he has an opportunity to enjoy the vacation as much as you and the kids do?

Being frugal is great, it really really is. BUT enjoying life is too , those who have the most money at the end , really don't win ; ).

 

[sk!mom]

My husband also is not a disney fan. (Really not a fan,I mean after the first time we went as a family in 2004 he said never again!) however I convinced him to try it one more timein 2006 and I took him to WL. We've been back 2 more times since and asks when we will go again

I say go for it, if you can afford to splurge then do it and treat your family. You will definitely love it. My kids enjoy the lodge and all it offers as much as the parks!

Wanted to agree with this, as well. My DS26 went with us last week for the first time in 7 years. He loved the Lodge and after previously swearing that he was done with Disney until parenthood- the lodge was partly responsible for changing his mind.

I will say that we no longer go, go, go. We've been enough times to know what we like and what we can skip. Our youngest is 15 so basically we all have adult tastes so we're no longer running around trying to fit in a wide range of attractions.

We spend a lot of time enjoying our resorts. We spent only about 4 hours in the park on our 3 Universal days. With the extra hour and FOTL, that was all we needed so we made full use of the Hard Rock pool. The Sunday pool party was one of DD's fave activities. Once we moved to Disney, we were up early and back to the resort by around 1:00 everyday for a long break and then back out around 5:00-6:00.

My dream resort is GF but it will be hard to convince DH and DS to go again and not stay at WL.