Lisa -- Thank you so much for stopping by my journal! I am looking forward to visiting yours, too. The idea of a new you for 25 is GREAT! I wish I had had the strength of will back then to do what you are doing now. Good luck on your wonderful journey!
Thanks, Mike! You know, I just went and read your journal and thought about more stuff that I wanted to write about from yesterday, because I think it will help me when I come back here on a weak day, to read that stuff.
First of all, I have to confess that, once again, I ate not too much food yesterday, but okay amounts of food at the wrong times. I got home from getting my fabulous new highlights
, ate a granola bar, and headed out to the fountain to do my walk. I walked as fast as I could and even did a few short jogging spurts. I did 4 circuits in one direction (1.7 miles) and then turned around and went in the other direction for another 4 circuits. The first 1.7 took me 26:12. The next took 25:32, so even though I was tired, those couple jogging spirts in the second 1/2 helped to make up for a less consistent pace.
Went I got home, I was very very hungry and kept drinking my powerade/water mix to get in lots of fluids -- I didn't want to carry the water bottle on my walk but drank right before getting out of my car and right when I got back in it. I am also pleased to report that I was dripping sweat by the time I was done (glad my seats are leather and not cloth). I have heard that you should work out hard enough at least twice a week to work up a sweat, and personally, I feel very satisfied when I sweat, knowing I was pushing myself.
So, I ate a tiny piece of a personal tombstone cheese pizza that DD had left on the counter (4 pts at most).
Then proceeded to cook a ton of meats DH had taken out of the freezer (stuff was getting freezer burned and I wanted to cook it all with sauces and seasonings, rather than throw it out). So, I made some turkey meatloaf muffins (idea from Don's meatball adventure the other night), cooked chicken breast in diced tomatoes with garlic, onions & peppers, and 4 boneless center cut pork chops. While it was cooking I ate a fat free hot dog on a lite hot dog roll (2 pts total)
When everything was cooked, I ate a small piece of chicken breast sorta cacciatore.
Not bad, but the reality is that I got home at 9 pm and didn't finish eating until 10. That just isn't healthy. I know that. I have yet to make that change to my life. It's no wonder other changes aren't happening. "If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten". In other words, note to self -- "make the change, idiot, and then you'll have cause to complain if you don't see progress."
So -- here is the long, sappy, whiny, TMI part (but, hey, it's my journal and I "should" write this stuff down, so I can learn from it.)
The scale showed NO downward movement today. In the past this type of long lasting plateau has always signaled the beginning of the end of my getting healthy efforts. And I have to admit I was tremendously frustrated. Because I know that even if I suddenly start to see a drop on the scale, it is not going to be so significant as to make up for all this time of no progress. I mean, really! Less than a pound a week loss? When I am walking, jogging, and biking at least 5x/week? WTH is going on?
I did so much better in the past when I was just eating better and not even exercising. Well, maybe I wasn't "doing better". I mean, I wasn't doing anything to get myself more healthy and fit beyond modifying my food intake. And while I felt good about myself for seeing results on the scale and in my clothes, I am not sure I had had the complete mental turnaround that I have had recently.
So, I stepped on the scale and said to Howard, "This is SO RIDICULOUS! What the @#&% is going on? Why isn't the scale moving?" and he told me he can tell the difference and it is obvious I am building muscle and toning and that is important too. Then he hugged me. And it hurt. I mean, he actually hurt my lowest right rib with the muscle in his arm. I could actually feel the muscle in his arm on my rib! No several inch thick fat padding for my rib there. That's good.
Then, I put on my cute little red cardigan with the embroidered stars and flags with a white tank top and navy chinos for casual Friday. This is the same cardigan I wore last summer on the Friday before July 4th. Last year, I wore a tank top under it because I couldn't button it. Well, that's not completely true -- I buttoned the top button and hoped it looked okay. Today, the cardigan is buttoned from the bottom up, with the top 2 buttons unbuttoned, and it looks cute. I have collar bones. I find I want to suck in my breath every once in a while just to make them REALLY noticeable!
Yeah, yeah, I am shallow. I'd like to say it doesn't take much to make me happy, but the fact is, I am trying to find reasons to be happy whereever I can. I am NOT going to give up. Wednesday will mark the 6 month anniversary of my surgery. I KNOW I am a healthier person now than I was on that operating table, and NOT just because of the change in my heart, but also the change in my "heart" and my soul and my head. Thursday is the "6 months until the 1/2 marathon" count down. I KNOW I will be a healthier person by the time that comes around. I am getting healthier every day. So, okay, I am not getting thin. And I'll never be anywhere near the size of my adorable 5'0" friend who worries when her weight goes over 100 pounds. But there is a heck of a lot that I can still accomplish.
Okay, enough. Time for lunch. Got myself past my hungry time with sugarless gum. Now I get a healthy lunch, and tonight will be an early dinner of a veggie loaded slice of thin crust pizza and a caramel apple with nuts. Yes, I will have the points. Yes, I will be eating very early in the evening. And NO, I am not going to feel guilty. The wonder of weight watchers it that you CAN have these treats. And I haven't been. Tonight is my splurge. Tomorrow morning is another 3.4 mile walk. A barbecue on Sunday, then the 5K is Monday morning. Looking forward to ALL this weekend has to offer.
Two whole days? No wonder I feel so out of touch with all my WISH friends. What was I thinking? 
We all know this is where we come when we are feeling less than 100% motivated. Not sure what is wrong today. Some days the weight loss seems soooo slow. I still can't believe how much I exercise and that I haven't lost like 40 pounds in the past 5 months! What is with that? Someone as LARGE as me should be losing much quicker than this. Only down 26.5 in 23 weeks. That is really disheartening. I HAVE to shift my focus away from the scale.
) 
I HAVE to let that motivate me. 
It is just like Beth said, if I don't eat what I want now, I find I will eat something less satisfying and then, ultimately, binge on what I really wanted or some other not-quite-as-good alternatives.
I know that feeling all too well. 
The one thing that was suggested to me to help me with my stalled weight loss was to journal every single thing I eat. You are already doing that so that is good. Maybe, you'll want to reverse your day so that you are eating larger meals in the morning and afternoon and eating a smaller meal in the evening. Maybe you could also have your dessert with lunch instead of dinner. Maybe you could also mix up your days where a few days a week you have higher points days followed by smaller points days. Whatever you decide Cam, please hang in there! You are doing such a great job and I just know that the scale will start cooperating with you soon! 
