buy in, contract, agreement for kids...

[septbride2002]

I don't mean to be rude but if you gave this to my kid I would be rather angry. First of all why do you assume my children would be doing any of these things - do you find me incomptent as a parent? Secondly it is not for you to parent my children, that is my job.

JMHO.
~Amanda

editted because I missed the part that said YOU were taking them on the cruise.

 

[mmouse37]

The part about "may not try everything on the menu"...I took that to mean even though they may not want to try everything on the menu, not that couldn't try everything on the menu.



MJ

 

[suzannef]

mmouse me too I think every body took it the other way though

 

[jhorstma]

I'd have them sign a pledge pledging that they will keep the eyes in the back of their heads open at all times - merely setting expectations for the young people under our care isn't enough. Let's face it - family vacations require responsible adults to remain responsible.

 

[JulieWent]

I'm with you JJsmama. I read it thinking about what I would have thought if my aunt had handed the list to me. I would have thought, "Am I really THIS bad?"

Julie

 

[scrapperjill]

Everyone keep in mind that they are taking 6 kids with them...dosn't sound like all the parents will be there...to supervise what their children are doing. And with the age range....13-18...That's a hand full...Kids will be kids no matter what guidance they have had. It's a big gester just offering to have the kids go along...but to have to keep control over 6 teenagers....not something I would want to handle...So having them look over an agreement and sign a contract on behavior and what is expected of them while they are cruising is (in my opnion) not rude. And to add one more thought....if they are taking along so many family members childrens...I feel that while they are on the trip (they being the Aunt and Uncle) are taking the role of parents...


Something to think about....maybe involve the other parents in the making of the contract before handing it to the kids.

 

[dzneprincess]

I think the idea behind it is great, however, I have to admit, you lost me about half way into it. I was blah blahing and yada yada yaing......Can you shorten it up or generalize it some more as suggested?

 

[faireygod mother]

I agree with scrapper. To me it is no different if they are staying in your home for a week without their parent. They still would abide by your rules. Besides Gritgirl took all the complaints, by us fellow DISers, and incorporated them in her contract. It is no more than anyone of us would have asked our children to do or expect them to. If my DS presented this to my son I figure he has a choice, agree or stay home. Like I said earlier, at least they know what to expect up front from ALL of us.

 

[natsmom125]

Love it Love it Love it

Wish I'd had it the first of the month....but will keep for next cruise.

This year's Pre TeenAge Drama Queen will be a full fledged TeenAge Drama Queen by that time......shoot, I can use some of this hear at home!!!!!! lol

Phyllis

 

[dis4me]

Faireygod mother I think you are taking that wrong. I don't think they are saying the kids CAN"T try everything they are saying even though they mon not want to try everything they shouldn'tmake fun of those who do.Also I think although it is lengthy sice they are not her children she has speifically laid the ground rules down. If I tol my kids to be on their best behavior or to behave Their idea may not be the same as what their friends soud consider best behaviour. She is simply laying out what she expects and if they cn't handle it they should graciously decline from the trip.

 

[CM_Mom]

Unless you know the kids have ALREADY practiced knocking and running, you might not want to give them any ideas.

I kind of like the short version but number the rules. Then when someone seems to be crossing the line, you can ask if they remember rule 4 or rule 5.

 

[scrapperjill]

The kids range from 13-18...and should be use to reading things at length...detail is good. Not to mention some kids really need things laid out for them. Sure some if not most of the items are common sense items listed...but it's just some of those things we think we really don't need to mention at all...that ends up needing to be mentioned the most.

 

[GritsGirl]

Thanks for the GREAT inputs!! I am going to do some tweaking accordingly.

First of all, I didn’t mean to mislead anybody…..their parents will be there; HOWEVER, the plan is for them to be in the “getting spoiled” mode and my husband and I will totally be in the parenting mode so we will be completely responsible for the kids. Now don’t get me wrong, if the kids REALLY push my limits and I think they need the “Almighty Look,” I will not hesitate to go get my sister off of the massage table for her to march in and give The Look. The kids will know that their lives hang in the balance if The Look is required! (The Look scares me too, as I grew up with it and know it well). My sister laughs at my lack of parenting skills because I can never keep a straight face even when I am ready to choke the kids………my sister just says, “Welcome to my life!” As far as my sister not wanting me to do “her job,” she is VERY WILLING to be relieved of duty for a week………she also teaches special ed so her "giving meter" is pegged at the end of every day. I REALLY hope she will relax on the trip.

My sister saw a draft of the agreement and really liked it……….she did say, “Do you really think my kids can be this good? Are you talking about the kids I live with every day?”

I realize that I could NOT send this to just anybody’s kids. For example, my brother’s wife would have a total tantrum because her head is so far in the sand about her children’s behavior that it is amazing she can breathe! Her kids would be AWFUL on a cruise because they have no ability to respect other people’s boundaries. Needless to say, we will never travel anywhere with that crew again (we had a miserable Disney trip last year)….which is sad to me.

I will re-work 1d because I guess it was confusing…..I DO want the kids to “try it all” as far as meals go if they choose…..I just don’t want them following Katerina (from Croatia—one of my favorite servers) to some table and say, “YUCK those are snails……EEEWWW!” Yes, a couple of them would do that on impulse.

Out of the six kids, four were adopted from Russia and certainly missed some basics during the beginning of their lives. They are all GREAT kids, there are just some individual challenges. I have no illusion that they will totally take this “contract” or “agreement” or whatever seriously…….but it does serve as a guide. I predict the youngest brother will pick up on the words chocolate and naked and nothing else. I doubt the youngest sister will even read it unless her mom works on it with her in small chunks.

I do think it is over the top, but that is kind of the point….just to lay out all possibilities. I will talk to the mother (my sister) about consequences. When my husband and I get the opportunity to be with the kids and treat them to something special, we are in SPOIL SPOIL SPOIL mode, so I hadn’t thought through the consequence thing. Also, I don’t want to give them any extra ideas for naughtiness so I might take out the knocking and calling stuff as CM Mom suggested. I will also cover the communication thing and the “we need to know where you are” stuff. I want to give them freedom, but I don’t want things getting out of hand. I have this FANTASY that they are going to want to do stuff with us since we don’t get to see them much at all. I talk to them on the phone every week, but that is different than really being together.

THANKS again for ALL of your inputs!!
Once again, I have written WAY TOO MUCH---I am just excited about everything.

GritsGirl

 

[kikipug]

GritsGirl... Would you like to adopt me, too! You are awesome to do that for your sister and for all the kids involved... I wish I could do the same for my sister--- we would all have a blast together, even though her youngest is now 15. (Sis and I took a 'sisters-only' cruise 2 years ago... never laughed so much in 5 days!!)

I wish you all well on your journey! Enjoy!!!

 

[jrabbit]

I just don’t want them following Katerina (from Croatia—one of my favorite servers) to some table and say, “YUCK those are snails……EEEWWW!” Yes, a couple of them would do that on impulse.

 

[DutchsMommy]

It seems to me that you are going to deliver the contract with the right mix of humour and "my Aunt the Drill Sargeant" so I think the kids will be fine with it. I also think spelling it out for some of them might actually stop something from happening, as they will recall the specifics and not have to determine whether x and x fall into the "bad behaviour" category or not.

I just have one thing to add - forgive my nit-picking but, under Section II, point C. I believe the correct wording is "beck and call"

Have a super trip!