Bus manners

[seashoreCM]

If someone puts things on the seats, s/he has the obligation to remove them quickly without anyone's asking if there are people standing.

Feet should never be put on seats -- on buses, in auditoriums, anywhere -- at any time.

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9/65 Disneyland
3/75 (World Inn* off I4 near DD)
4/85 (Kon-Tiki* on 192)
'80s Disneyland once or twice
7/94 POR
9/97 ASMu
11/98 ASMu
12/98 (Knights Inn on 192)
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12/00 ASSp
9/01 ASSp
11/01 ASSp
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Guess I goofed! (11/01) I was seated on the bus when a lady standing near me picked up her sleepy son. It was crowded and seemed difficult for me to squeeze out of the seat to exchange places with her, and it seemed like only a minute more to the resort, therefore I did not. But I was seriously considering, "I'll let the child sit on MY lap". Yes I look like the kind of person people point fingers at for not offering a seat.

Many years ago I was on the subway (Boston) and a lady was yelling at a seated man for having a large box with him, even though he took it off the seat (and someone else sat there). She was saying things like "you should pay another fare for that thing".

 

[robinb]

As far as robinb says that I was rude to "yell at him" after I didn't ask him to move that stroller, well first of all I didn't YELL at him and I never thought that someone else wouldn't let my daughter sit down.

OK, my bad. I assumed you yelled at him after reading the following exchange:

I was furious!! Also there were men sitting down to busy kissing their girlfriends to get up and be a GENTLEMAN and offer us their seats.. I was so upset>I went to the front of the bus and waited for the man to get off who had the stroller taking 2 seats to tell them how upset I was!!! He said well you should have said something!! Bull!!! YOu saw us get on the bus and looked the other way.

I guess I must have read it wrong .

FWIW, I really do sympathize with you. I would hate to ride the bus standing with a sleeping child clinging to me all the way back to the All Stars. Sometimes being the last one on the bus can be an awkward situation because the driver turns the lights off and takes off. I am surprised that no one gave you a seat, but maybe they didn't know you really needed it until it was too late and the lights were off. Yes, the men with the strollers should have given you the seat. But ... I still think that you should have asked them for the seat when you got on, or when your DD fell asleep, not at the end of the ride!

Does anyone else remember the last "bus seat" thread when someone (Figaro30?) posted that she got yelled at by someone because she didn't give up her seat to a woman with a sleeping child? Sheeh. I think that one made it to the "Debate" Board!

 

[GEM]

"You are missing the point GEM. No one is forcing you to take the seat...the point is that offering is the polite, right thing to do. A simple No Thank You will do if you do not want the seat."


I'm not missing the point, I just don't see why it is the polite thing to do. Why should a man be expected to offer his seat on the bus to a woman who is fully capable of standing. He's probably just as exhausted from wandering around the theme parks as she is. If he's on the bus first, he deserves the seat. Yes, if she is old, sick, pregnant, carrying a child, etc. then it would be rude for a man not to give up his seat for her. But in those cases, it would also be rude for me (a woman) not to give up MY seat for her. I don't think I deserve a seat on a crowded bus just because I'm a woman.

 

[Trekker]

I think I'm missing the point. if I go out of my way and pass on buses that have standing room only, to wait for a bus that has seats available because my family and I have had a long day at the parks or where ever, I am then supposed to give up that seat because someone else does not want to wait for a bus with seats available?

I do not get it.....

 

[Buzz2001]

posted by GEM
I'm not missing the point, I just don't see why it is the polite thing to do. Why should a man be expected to offer his seat on the bus to a woman who is fully capable of standing. He's probably just as exhausted from wandering around the theme parks as she is. If he's on the bus first, he deserves the seat. Yes, if she is old, sick, pregnant, carrying a child, etc. then it would be rude for a man not to give up his seat for her. But in those cases, it would also be rude for me (a woman) not to give up MY seat for her. I don't think I deserve a seat on a crowded bus just because I'm a woman.

Like I stated early, then just say No Thanks. It's only a polite offer. I can't change the way I was raised; to open doors, pull out a chair or offer a seat. But it's not about man or women, it is about being polite. If it was a women with a stroller taking up the seat the same should apply. Both my DW and I are able bodied individuals but I would never let her stand on the bus if only one seat were available. But it's not meant in a way that she is any less of a person than me, it's just who I am. It's not meant as a slam against you or any women.

But on the other hand, I have never had a women tell me not to open that door or offer me a seat. It is usually greeted with a thank you.

posted by WDWtrekker
I think I'm missing the point. If I go out of my way and pass on buses that have standing room only, to wait for a bus that has seats available because my family and I have had a long day at the parks or wherever, I am then supposed to give up that seat because someone else does not want to wait for a bus with seats available?

Yes...first every child should be in a seat.

Basic Etiquette
(As practiced in the United States)
On Public Transportation
When you take a local bus, train or subway, always wait for people to get off first before boarding. Once on the bus, give your seat to the following people:

the elderly, especially the frail ones
the disabled, whether on crutches or not
pregnant women
women with young children

 

[The Hunt]

A few points:

1. Manners are not always logical. While it may not be logical for a tired man to give up his seat to an able-bodied woman, in the past (and it the present in some places) this is considered one of the commonplace requirements of good manners. I've seen very elderly men offer to give up their seats to young women.
2. Manners change. I don't think I've seen a young woman accept the offer of a seat lately.
3. Manners aren't about rights. Nobody has a right to your seat, unless you're sitting in the designated handicapped seat, or unless the bus operator has a rule that certain people get seats over others. If you give up your seat, you get a karmic gold star for being nice.
4. If somebody is blocking a seat with a stroller or bag, asking them politely to move it is educational for everyone involved.
5. Some people are just jerks, and wouldn't give up their seat if a one-legged blind lady with two babies in her arms got on the bus. Getting mad at these people doesn't make them feel guilty, and only makes your blood pressure go up.

 

[MeanLaureen]

Posted by WDWTrekker

I think I'm missing the point. if I go out of my way and pass on buses that have standing room only, to wait for a bus that has seats available because my family and I have had a long day at the parks or where ever, I am then supposed to give up that seat because someone else does not want to wait for a bus with seats available?

Ron, I'm sorry but I just have to get my .02 cents in on what you said.

I am 34 years old and to anyone that meets me on the street, I look the picture of health. However, I have a rare disease that can cause me, with no warning, to go from a normal temperature to a fever of up to and beyond 104 degrees in a matter of 60 seconds. Sometimes I come close to passing out. I live with severe joint pain and that inflames when the fever spikes. I don't know when this will happen to me and there is no rhyme or reason to the frequency. I take a chemotherapy drug to try to control it, but it doesn't always work. If this happens to me while I am in the park, I want to get back to my hotel. I don't want to wait another 20+ minutes for a bus with seats available. This possibly could even happen to me while I am on the bus.

I guess you can say "maybe you shouldn't be going on vacation when you are sick". Well, chances are, I won't get better. I don't let it get the best of me. I work 40+ hours a week and I go to WDW 3-4 times a year. I'm not going to sit back and wait for this disease to kill me. I'm going to enjoy life!

You might want to keep this in mind the next time you are on a bus and someone asks for your seat.

I do not get it.....

No Ron.. you don't get it.

 

[Trekker]

Laureen

No need to apoligize, we are all entitled to our opinion.

There are exceptions to everything. Someone who is ill and has an immediate need to get back to there resort is different than someone who thinks the should be offered a seat because of thier gender or age. If you noticed in an earlier post of mine, I stated that my teenage son and I have given up our seat on many occasions. I take offense to people who expect someone to give up a seat for them any time they enter the bus. They can wait for the next bus as well as I can.

I am 43 years old and to anyone that meets me on the street, I look the picture of health. However, I have several physical problems that can cause me problems at anytime without much warning. Diabetes (crashing on your blood sugars is no picnic), artheritis, one knee that is nothing but bone on bone and will lock-up or give out for no reason, etc....

Now let me ask a question, if this 43 YO healthy looking male and a 50 YO healthy looking female enter the bus and there is standing room only, what is going to happen? How do you determine who to "offer" your seat to? There is a difference when someone is in dire straits and asks for a seat because they are ill.

 

[Jen D]

This reminds me-- here in NY, on buses or subways, there are seats with signs that say "won't you please give this seat to the elderly or disabled." These mean that it is okay for an able-bodied person to sit there as long as they give it up when called upon. Isn't the front of Disney buses (which are the exact same buses NY MTA uses, btw) also designated the same way? It isn't a perfect system, because there are always jerks, but it solves the problem of someone not wanting to give up a hard-won seat-- if you are sitting in those designated seats, it isn't really your seat to keep, you have to give it up.

On giving seats to the elderly-- I am a (somewhat) young woman, and I often offer my seats to older folks on trains or buses, but you do need to be careful-- early on I offended people, particularly elderly men, seemed angry or embarrassed by having a seat offered to them. So what I do now is try to vacate my seat quietly without doing it in a way that might be embarrassing to them. (the problem is, if you don't make it clear who you are vacating your seat for, some healthy young jerk will grab the seat before that person has a chance to get it.)

I don't know-- all this is more complicated than it looks.

 

[pooh6890]

First....Ron, I get your point. Also, my daughters and I have given up our seats when there was a necessity or we felt we should too. We usually always wait for another bus going or coming back from the parks so we have seats. Now the other point. It's funny all these tired sick frail people were at the parks all day long in the heat and crowds and then wait until the last absolute moment the park closes to leave. All of a sudden they are desperately tired and need to get back ASAP? Think about it.....if they were so tired, why didn't they just leave earlier?

 

[pooh6890]

Oh, I forgot......FLAME AWAY

 

[SueM in MN]

You are right about the WDW buses, Jen. I don't remember the exact wording, but there is a sign above the front seats on each side of the bus that says the seats should be given up for elderly or handicapped riders. There is also a sign above the seats near the back of the bus that fold up to make a wheelchair or ecv are.

 

[seashoreCM]

Although this does not help a younger parent carrying a child, the bus driver could, in the interests of safety, say things like that "the bus cannot be moved until the lady with the cane is seated".

This one probably does not apply to most of Disney buses, where everyone gets off at the same stop, but I would like to see city bus drivers take note of infirm persons boarding the bus. If able bodied persons don';t give them the front seats so marked the driver should announce that he will personally escort the infirm passenger off as his stop and that could delay everyone's ride.

At one time (not sure if still) in San Francisco, bus drivers were told to not pull away from a stop until everyone boarding had paid their fare.