Breast feeding in public... gross or okay?

[BeenHereB4]

Now /that/ is a topic for another thread if I ever saw one -->

Moobs in public...gross or okay?

Thumbs down on moobs in public for me.

 

[Halbleib1]

I agree that most women know there are two options as far as feeding their babies, but I do think there is "more work to do", to make breastfeeding more acceptable in society and support the women who do it. Many women quit earlier than they want to because of the flak they get BFIP or pumping at work.

Many women say they will breastfeed "if I can". Of course, some women can't breastfeed (I know that, I'm an adoptive mom who tried to relactate, but couldn't!), but in our society, there is a perception that this is a huge, commonplace problem. Perfectly healthy women with normal breasts seem to think there is a huge possibility that they won't be able to, and set themselves up for failure. Failure rates among women who attempt breastfeeding in the U.S. are much higher than in other countries where breastfeeding is seen as perfectly acceptable and women encourage each other to keep trying.

I thought they just stopped automatically handing them to every mother, and pulling out bottles and feeding every child whose mom was asleep when they cried? Don't they still give out the free samples to women who ask for them? That's been what I have read about these policy changes in hospitals around the country.

Like I said, I couldn't bf one of my kids (even though other adoptive moms have been successful). I have been on the receiving end of the dirty looks when breastfeeding my first, and when bottle-feeding my second. I always try to give a big smile to every mom I see feeding her baby, whether by breast or by bottle, because I know that every one of us deserves to be supported in what she does.

What I had heard on a morning show based in New York was that they were not going to accept formula samples from the companies to hand out. Maybe that has since changed. I can't say for sure as I do not live in NYC but either way I think they should still be handing these out. Even moms that breastfeed sometimes need to subliment with formula for one reason or another. They have always included breastfeeding information in with the samples anyway. And you have always had the right to turn them down as well. I think the choice should be left up to the mother not the hospital or any other advocacy group.

I totally agree that babies should not be being fed with a bottle while the mother is asleep if she chose to breastfeed. They should wake her up unless she has told them that it is ok to bottlefeed while she is asleep.

 

[disfan07]

I think that it's great for women who are able to breastfeed. The only time that this whole breastfeeding debate gets out of hand is when someone thinks that you are a bad mother for NOT breastfeeding.

I was once told that I shouldn't have kids because i will not be able to breastfeed for medical reasons. I literally wanted to strangle them right then and there. And that is not the only time i've been told something like that. Just like with everything else that can be debated, I respect your choice and you better respect mine as well.

If I could, would I choose to breastfeed....most likely yes. But I am on medications that will keep me form ever being able to breastfeed. I'm already going to have to go off these meds if I ever want to get pregnant which is not an optimal choice but it is necessary. Staying off of these for long enough to breastfeed is not an option.

 

[GEM]

I think that it's great for women who are able to breastfeed. The only time that this whole breastfeeding debate gets out of hand is when someone thinks that you are a bad mother for NOT breastfeeding.

I was once told that I shouldn't have kids because i will not be able to breastfeed for medical reasons. I literally wanted to strangle them right then and there. And that is not the only time i've been told something like that. Just like with everything else that can be debated, I respect your choice and you better respect mine as well.

If I could, would I choose to breastfeed....most likely yes. But I am on medications that will keep me form ever being able to breastfeed. I'm already going to have to go off these meds if I ever want to get pregnant which is not an optimal choice but it is necessary. Staying off of these for long enough to breastfeed is not an option.

Not true. It also understandably gets out of hand when people tell those of who do breastfeed that we're doing something gross, weird, or indecent....or that they think breastfeeding is great as long as nursing moms stay hidden away in a bathroom or car or cover up with a blanket or wean by a certain age.

Not saying you were saying any of that at all....just trying to point out that there are sensitive feelings and rude, ignorant people on both sides of the issue.

 

[ginna74]

It is all a matter of modesty. I still thinking flopping them out then an hour later feeding is just innapropriate.. then hiding behind the BF tag. Like I said there is the difference between feeding (for your baby's well being) and being a streaker. The difference is showing it all. You can't complain about people guaking if you are like HERE LOOK AT MY BEWBS!!! Discreet "feeding" is different TOTALLY. I will not be hesitant to call the police on the streaker who is getting off on leaving it out there, or a man running through the park nekid. Again, Haven't seen it but a few times (and seen tons who have not done this) but I am here to tell you it happens and that is MY only gripe. It isn't the bewbs either it is the abusing of the laws that get to me as in getting off in public.

NOW TAking MY shirt off and going for a walk...

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Not sure if it is the "new norm:" as you say....
I breastfed, I think it is a wonderful bonding and Healthy experience.
IMHO,
I also think it is RUDE and UN-necessary to force ones "feedings" on the public at large. There are more than enough accommodations for privacy! As much as one likes to "feed" their child, everyone else should not have to be exposed to it. What happened to "modesty?" In this day of all things showing: thongs, butts and breasts , it does not surprise me though....just much less modesty than years ago.... Just MHO...!

Well, I will go hide when people who bottlefeed go hide to feed their kids too. (I don't care whether you bottlefeed or breastfeed- just making a point) It has nothing to do with modesty. It's not like women are stripping down naked to bf. I have bf all over and I can tell you that most people probably didn't have a clue what I was doing. No blanket but I am not swinging the girls around for a jaunt either.
There are plenty of things in life I don't want to be exposed to. When I am at a restaurant (since we are talking eating) I don't want to look up and see some buffon chewing with their mouth open, food dripping, and licking their fingers. That makes me gag. Where is their modesty? That imo is truly gross and they should eat in private imo but they are allowed to eat in public with the rest of us.

 

[GEM]

It is all a matter of modesty. I still thinking flopping them out then an hour later feeding is just innapropriate.. then hiding behind the BF tag. Like I said there is the difference between feeding (for your baby's well being) and being a streaker. The difference is showing it all. You can't complain about people guaking if you are like HERE LOOK AT MY BEWBS!!! Discreet "feeding" is different TOTALLY. I will not be hesitant to call the police on the streaker who is getting off on leaving it out there, or a man running through the park nekid. Again, Haven't seen it but a few times (and seen tons who have not done this) but I am here to tell you it happens and that is MY only gripe. It isn't the bewbs either it is the abusing of the laws that get to me as in getting off in public.

NOW TAking MY shirt off and going for a walk...

Call the police, but here's what you should know first...

Twenty-eight states, the District of Columbia and the Virgin Islands exempt breastfeeding from public indecency laws (Alaska, Arizona, Arkansas, Florida, Illinois, Kentucky, Louisiana, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, Mississippi, Montana, Nevada, New Hampshire, New York, North Carolina, North Dakota, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Carolina, South Dakota, Tennessee, Utah, Virginia, Washington, Wisconsin and Wyoming).

Honestly, so many people bring up this kind of thing. I'm around nursing moms all the time. I've gone to like a 100 La Leche League functions. I've never seen anything like what you described. I'm sure it happens every so often, but...seriously....you have to admit that certainly isn't the norm. Now, sure, you may be able to tell a woman is nursing. You may accidentally get little flash of skin or even....oh, the horror...nipple just for a quick second. But, honestly, there are waaaay fewer woman out there just taking off their whole shirt or whipping out their entire bare breast than you would think after reading these types of threads. Personally, I've never seen it. And, I actively look for nursing moms everywhere we go.

 

[FireDancer]

I think women should be able to go around shirt less if they want.. heck some men out there have bigger breasts than I do and mine aren't small! what's the difference?

There are resorts for that.

Just sayin'

 

[ginna74]

you kinda missed my point.... streaking is still illegal. and you are right it doesn't happen much but it does. and THAT is what I am talking about. USING your bewbs to get off... er.. HEY EVERYONE LOOK AT MY BEWBS thing. Not the oh I am going to feed in a sec here thing. You are right though they could just say hey I was BFing lol.

just to be uh funny if I see that again I just just take my top off too.... OMG the eyes I would hurt

 

[CaliforniaDreamin]

Haven't read the whole thread, but here goes..

I nursed both my babies and was very discreet. I covered my babies up before unlatching the place on front. Even so, I would get " go to heck" looks, mainly from older people. I felt like asking them how they thought they were fed, or how Jesus was fed. These people made me embarrassed and ashamed to breast feed. Many times I had to sit on a toilet with no lid (this was before "family rooms" or sit in the car to feed the baby. I have no regrets, I just wish I had the nerve to have said something when I got dirty looks. But I was 19 and 21....so I never said anything. Just cried while feeding my babies.

 

[GEM]

you kinda missed my point.... streaking is still illegal. and you are right it doesn't happen much but it does. and THAT is what I am talking about. USING your bewbs to get off... er.. HEY EVERYONE LOOK AT MY BEWBS thing. like I said modesty is still the key.

I din't miss your point. I just didn't think there was one.

You said you would call the police if you saw someone who, in your opinion, was "getting off" on leaving it "out there". I was just pointing out that, legally, the police wouldn't be able to do anything....since it's not illegal in your home state. According to the law, a breastfeeding mother can expose as much of her breasts as she wants to and not be subject to indecency laws. Of course, I don't know anybody who actually does that, but I've already discussed that.

If it's exhibitionism that bothers you, definitely avoid the beach. You're much more likely to see tons of "hey everyone look at my bewbs" (seriously, bewbs???) people at the beach on any given day. You'll also see tons of "hey eveyone look at my buhhtt" people.

Most nursing mothers, on the other hand, are just trying to feed their babies.

 

[ginna74]

edited to add: EEEEEEEEK I gave the post another look and I am just going to say ty for being civil .....tytyty

 

[DVCJones]

First, I just want to say that I am all for breastfeeding. I breastfed both of my DDs. Anyway, I think it is perfectly fine for a women to sit somewhere and breastfeed her baby in public. However, I must admit that I was a little shocked when I was shopping in Victoria's Secret at the mall and saw a young woman breastfeeding her baby while she shopped. Her breast was just hanging out while the baby who was in one of those Bjorn carriers was nursing as she shopped. Hands free!!!! Talk about multitasking.

 

[ginna74]

First, I just want to say that I am all for breastfeeding. I breastfed both of my DDs. Anyway, I think it is perfectly fine for a women to sit somewhere and breastfeed her baby in public. However, I must admit that I was a little shocked when I was shopping in Victoria's Secret at the mall and saw a young woman breastfeeding her baby while she shopped. Her breast was just hanging out while the baby who was in one of those Bjorn carriers was nursing as she shopped. Hands free!!!! Talk about multitasking.

wowwwwwwwww I had a front carrier wayyyyyy back when.... and still wasn't good at multi tasking like that....

 

[fortheluvofpooh]

100% natural. Sorry, doesn't bother me at all. I was a breastfeeding mommy. My youngest is now 4.

 

[phillmolly]

My big complaint is poopy diapers. Why do moms think that because I am a woman and over 40 that I wouldn't mind seeing/smelling a child's poopy diaper in the woman's room? For the record, it turns my stomach. Please try and carry around plastic bags so that when you have to change the diaper, you can enclose it quickly. I also don't understand why it is acceptable to have those changing diaper tables in the open. I REALLY don't want to see your child diaperless and the poopy diaper. Can't they make curtains for that?

As a mom of a 13 month old I totally agree with this!!! I hate having to change my son in the middle of the restroom with people coming in and out and he is hanging out everywhere! Just recently we were grocery shopping and he had a major blow out and I had to have him stripped down with poo all over in the middle of the restroom, I felt bad for me and him and all the women and girls who were coming in and out! It would be nice if more places had seperate family restrooms!

 

[Beavers5]

My thoughts are that a store is meant for shopping and not for feeding children. A restaurant is meant for feeding children, so it would not seem out of place there. It seems like it shouldn't matter that the breast feeding person doesn't care, it should matter that the place is appropriate for breast feeding. You might be comfortable breast feeding your child on IASW, but it would not be an appropriate place to do it. All I'm saying is find an appropriate place to do it, not hide in a corner.

Lisa, I don't think breast feeding is a shameful act at all. In fact, most of the women in my family have chosen to breast feed their children. Just because I have an opinion that a woman shouldn't walk around a store breast feeding, doesn't mean I don't think a woman has a right to breast feed in public.

I know the law states a woman can do it anywhere, but to me, that doesn't mean a woman should. I see no reason why someone can't find a bench or some out of the way place, instead of walking around a store. I wouldn't walk around the store and feed any age child.

When I went to WDW with my SIL and her baby was ready to nurse, she found a bench and nursed her. It was great. She didn't walk around the park with her top down and do it. I thought the way she did it was respectful of those around her and accomplished the purpose of feeding her child.

It seems like some people who choose breast feeding think that any disagreement with the time or place a woman chooses to breast feed means they are anti-breast feeding. That isn't the case at all. Since it really serves to purpose to argue about it, I will back away because I know this is a very controversial topic and it's not my intention to make comments that others might find hurtful.

It would be convenient if babies were only hungry when they were in restaurants or if I could stop everything and go to a restaurant when my baby is hungry; but it just doesn't work that way. The first few weeks and during growth spurts, my DDs would/will eat for up to 40 minutes out of every hour. If I were to stop and find a place to sit whenever she is hungry, a trip through WalMart could seriously take me 4-5 hours. And then someone would post on here about how big of a tantrum my toddler was throwing at the store, lol.

I don't see how sitting on a bench is more appropriate than sitting on IASW. The seats on IASW are certainly bench-like and if we are on a ride people have something else to distract themselves.

Now that's a distraction technique I haven't tried!!! My 7 yr old saying baby wants "b o o b juice" really loud is bad enough!!! (he heard daddy or me say it to the baby a few times at home LOL!)

(I had to put spaces because b o o b is a bad word on DIS!)

That's like the few times I tried to cover up my youngest with a blanket. My older two were both constantly asking if the baby could breath under there and the two year old kept loudly asking if the baby was drinking mommy milk. I have since figured out that nursing shirts and no blanket are much more discreet for our family.


When we were at WDW, I nursed wherever the baby was hungry. But, I tried to time feedings for while we were on seated rides or shows. If we were walking while feeding, you couldn't really tell. The baby was mostly covered by the baby wrap. I only had 1 comment/look in our week at WDW and it came from someone working at the Baby Care Center!!! I had taken my girls to the Baby Care Center near Crystal Palace to let one use the potty and change the other one's diaper; the baby started acting hungry. They have a nursing room, but I knew my toddler would never go for sitting in a quiet room doing nothing. So, I nursed in the room with the TV. The woman working first pointed out that there was a room for nursing and then 3 different times in 30 minutes asked if I wanted to use the nursing room. Each time I just smiled and told her no thank you.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

What I had heard on a morning show based in New York was that they were not going to accept formula samples from the companies to hand out. Maybe that has since changed. I can't say for sure as I do not live in NYC but either way I think they should still be handing these out. Even moms that breastfeed sometimes need to subliment with formula for one reason or another. They have always included breastfeeding information in with the samples anyway. And you have always had the right to turn them down as well. I think the choice should be left up to the mother not the hospital or any other advocacy group.

I totally agree that babies should not be being fed with a bottle while the mother is asleep if she chose to breastfeed. They should wake her up unless she has told them that it is ok to bottlefeed while she is asleep.

I do my best to avoid formula.

But I had two babies with a legitimate medical need for some formula.

One had climbing bilirubin levels. I supplemented in the hospital b/c they made me (bad bad relationship with on-call pediatrician at the hospital who did a poor job of explaining my dd's issue!). Once I got home, I was able to stop the feedings. The only reason they wanted the FF was to increase her pooping to eliminate the bilirubin. A few months later, we had her tested and foudn out that she was a healthy baby who only had a poo diaper literally once every 2-3 weeks. The formula in the hospital didn't help increase it at all. She was monitored with frequent blood tests for about two weeks until her numbers showed consisted declining levels.

The other was born with high blood sugar and in that case, even the la leche league "approves" (that sounds bad, but I was very concerned about being lied to and did follow up on that to make sure!) of formula b/c I guess it is higher protein or something than colostrum which I believe is mostly carb. He had 2 reads of high blood sugar and was given a little bottle each time. Once he had a normal blood sugar, he didn't have to be FF and once he was normal for 2 readings in a row, they would stop testing him.

If a hospital failed to have formula--at least for my son, it would have been a serious problem.

 

[Mysteria]

Nvm

 

[phillmolly]

I wish I could have NIP!! Due to several different issues I could never get my son to nurse so I ended up pumping for him for several months. So when we were out in public and I was giving him a bottle while carrying him in the sling or Beco I was giving him BM. We did end up switching him full time to formula at about six months but I really do miss that I didn't get a chance to BF him. If we ever get lucky enough to have a second baby I plan on BF'ing and I now know several things I will do different to ensure that I can succesfully BF.

BTW, I am a threadkiller so this will probally be the last post on this subject, LOL!