Breast Cancer

[PoohBear]

My sister in law was just diagnosed with breast cancer, she's 46. Her mother died from it over a decade ago.
She is waiting to go for all of her testing to find out the type and stage. She is understandably depressed. I am trying to think of what would be a good gift for Christmas. She loves Christmas and is looking for us to cheer her up. She has a great sense of humor and loves for me to be her comic relief but I am running out of material. Is there something she is going to need while she undergoes treatment? She has two grown daughters and my brother who are at home with her. So, she will be cared for. Sorry, I know I am rambling but I am so lost on how to help her. Any ideas?
Thanks for the help!

 

[KJ Luvs Pluto]

There are all kinds of things she may need depending on her exact diagnosis and what kinds of treatment she will be going through. If she needs chemo, a care package with a soft blanket, cuticle cream, a chenille hat (or some other very soft material), body lotion that doesn't have strong odors to it, vasaline (for lips and to put up a very dry nose), mineral oil (to put on after a shower), Ensure to help with her caloric needs - etc.

If she has been just diagnosed and has stage 1 or stage 2 theres a book I wish I would have bought right away. I didn't get it until the week before I started chemo. It's called "Just Get Me Throughs This! A practical guide to coping with Breast Cancer" by Deborah Cohen. She wrote it along with her oncologist and is filled with practical information.

How about coupons for home-cooked dinner, babysitting, dog walking, house cleaning etc. from you or someone you can pay to do those things for when she is just too tired to take care of these chores. Or even some sessions of relaxation/therapy.

That's all I can think of right now. I'm sorry she's having a hard time right now. While it stinks to have to go through it - it's just not as bad as all of the horror stories people like to relate. There are so many new treatments and things that can be done to alleviate the side effects of treatments.

I'm on chemo right now, I have 6 weeks of radiation after that, another surgery after that and then 5 years of Tamoxofin. So it is a long road and a life changing one, but then again, everything we do can have life-changing consequences. This just happens to be a challenge that is given to some of us.

Tell her that many of us are going through this and we will be thinking of her.

 

[minniebeth]

I don't have any ideas, as I'm not familiar with what she may need, but I just wanted to say to you and for your SIL. She and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[dogodisney]

OP, how is you SIL doing?

 

[PoohBear]

I certainly hope the laughing smilie was an accident!

She was originally supposed to have a lumpectomy (sp?). Unfortunately, when all the tests had been done it turns out it is too large. They think it has been there for several years. Sadly, she was not getting her mammograms.
Anyway, she has been going through chemo for the past month. I guess it is going as well as chemo can be expected. She seems to keep having problems with her white blood cell count being too low and they have her on injections for it. She does not want to talk about it. She feels if she doesn't talk about it then she can pretend everything is fine. She won't even tell her daughters what is going on. The doctors have to tell my brother what is going on while she likes to leave the room for them to talk.
I wish I knew what to do for her but this is the type of person she is. We are not allowed to ask her how she is doing. So, for now we just follow her lead and accept whatever she decides. I just wish she would tell my nieces more because, God forbid, this could be their future.
Thank you for asking

 

[Mackey Mouse]

Hi everyone..

Please if you see a post like the ones that have been deleted.. more especially the one with a smiley face.. please report them. I caught it this morning and I will be watching. Breast cancer is no laughing matter and I will not put up with that kind of posting..

To the OP, as someone who is going through chemotherapy right now, granted not for breast cancer, but still chemotherapy.. I was thinking what would I want during that time. I am having a hard time with reading.. like books, but quick reading is ok like magazines and so I was thinking what about a subscription to her favorite magazine. Also, body cream.. maybe not with fragrance though as our noses can be quite sensitive during this time... although I do love jasmine or lavender and those are pleasing to me.

Anyway.. hugs to you and she is lucky to have you in her life thinking about what you can do to make her life easier during this time..

 

[PrincessKsMom]

Mackey I'm sorry to hear you're having to battle this horrible disease. Sending prayers and pixie dust to both Mackey and the OP's SIL.