Boys in locker room

[DopeyDame]

OK, so since the dis loves this topic, I'll throw a slight twist out there...

DS (age 4) and I were at the gym swimming several weeks ago. Our gym has a sign on the door saying children 6 and over should use the correct locker room or use the two family bathrooms. The family bathrooms are plenty big enough to get changed in, but they don't have a shower.

Anyway, I got DS changed out of his bathing suit and was about to change myself when I looked in the mirror and saw a boy, probably about 8 or 9, standing at the sink, having just gotten out of the shower. In the ladies room. I definitely did not feel comfortable changing in front of him, so went into one of the shower stalls to change.

Was I wrong to be uncomfortable? Should I have reported it to the staff?

It really wasn't a big deal in my life, but one of my first thoughts was "oh the Dis would LOVE to hear about this!"

 

[mjkacmom]

I would have reported him. What used to drive me nuts is when women would use the family changing room with their girls, or men with their boys. They can use the regular locker rooms! I always had multiple kids of different sexes, and when my boys were little (ours have the age 4 rule also), I'd rather not send them into the men's locker room to shower and change.

There was always a wait at the family rooms.

 

[LilyWDW]

I would bring it up with the gym and explain that some members are not following the age rules. That child should NOT have been in the women's locker room. Period.

 

[bumbershoot]

First, make sure the child is as old as you think. I know plenty of kids who appear to be much older than they are. Most recent is a girl that I thought was a peer to my 9year old son (who is closing in on bring as tall as me by the way) but who had just turned 6

Second, they need showers in the family changing/bathrooms.

And yes once it has been determined that a child IS too old then sure, tell staff. I tell staff at my y about young kids on the equipment if they haven't seen them yet.

At my Y the policy isn't as clear; they say "until 7" but on specific questioning they say "oh that means until they are 8". When DS was 7 I still didn't feel happy about sending him to the perceived wilds of the male family locker room so we would go through the female family locker room using the private changing areas and covering his eyes as we went through the shower room to the pool (design flaw IMO). Finally he and DH convinced me that it isn't scary in there, that there are fathers being just as mindful and kind as the women in the other room, and that it was ok. My son was so happy when I reached that place in my head lol.

 

[cjbcam]

I would report it. I'm sorry but that's ridiculous my girls (10,8 and5) don't feel comfortable changing in front of their brother that's 3. I could not imagine my 8 yr old finding it ok to change in front of her classmates. Or my 5 year old for that matter. That is why there are FAMILY change rooms. I was once changing in a change room and a mom had her 7/8 year old son in there and she asked me to use a stall because she didnt want her son to see? I'm like no if you think he shouldn't be seeing then you should have taken him into the family change room.

 

[crisi]

I would report it. I'm sorry but that's ridiculous my girls (10,8 and5) don't feel comfortable changing in front of their brother that's 3. I could not imagine my 8 yr old finding it ok to change in front of her classmates. Or my 5 year old for that matter. That is why there are FAMILY change rooms. I was once changing in a change room and a mom had her 7/8 year old son in there and she asked me to use a stall because she didnt want her son to see? I'm like no if you think he shouldn't be seeing then you should have taken him into the family change room.

My daughter came home from Girl Scout camp and reported that many of the other campers - all girls - changed in the bathroom (which made it very difficult - their aren't enough stalls in the bathroom for it to be used for changing). She said that the older girls wouldn't care, but in particular it was the eight to ten year old crowd. Privacy is a big deal at that age.

 

[disneywalkers]

I don't see this as the same as boys in the women's bathroom since people are undressing and not behind stall doors so I would indeed mention it to staff.
You can word it in a way showing you're not sure of his age but he looks to be 8-9.
I agree with the PP who brought up that issue about looking their age.
We recently started a new Church and met this girl who we assumed was younger than my 8 year old girl. She is closer to the size of my 6 year old boy but come to find out she is 10, close to 11. I'm still shocked every time I see her. So it's possible for that to go either way.
It's unfortunate though that it sounds like they aren't like a place we uses to go back in OK. They had "stalls with curtain" to change in and showers with curtains.