Birthday Party RSVPs

[SereneOne]

My daughter is having her first friends bday party tomorrow. Before it was just our family because she was sick and even possibly in the hospital. I sent out invitations to the kids in her class, twenty-one invites in all. I sent them out eight days in advance. She is having a party at Chuck E. Cheese and each child will get 32 tokens, CC gift bags, 3d cups, pizza, soda, cake, etc. I have had six parents call, one to decline and the rest to accept, two asked to bring siblings, which I agreed to. The other 15 I have heard no word from. I was going to call and lessen the head count, since it is 16 dollars per head, but my husband said that people will show up without RSVPing...

What has been your experiences as far as bday parties and RSVPs? Also, with Chuckie Cheese birthday parties and the like, did you pay for food for the parents too, or just the children?

Thanks!

 

[aprilgail2]

At all parties around here you provide food and drink for the parents as well as the children. As far as RSVPing I would have called the ones that did not respond tonight and asked if they were coming or not. I send out the invites 3-4 weeks in advance and there is a big school event a week prior to her party so i usually pin the people down there asking if they are coming or not. I can't stand how people don't have the manners to call and say " sorry we can't make it". I would call and give them a smaller number for the party- if extras come they just fit them in and add them on. I ALWAYS RSVP for 2 kids less than I have "yes" answers for- most of the time one that says they are coming do not come-

 

[teacups]

That is a lot of money! And it's very rude of them to show up if they didnt RSVP. And it's kinda rude to ask to bring a sibling too! That is silly. Let me tell you, those parents could have easily taken the sibling but paid for their own food and play tokens. That is not right.

I wouldnt count on all of them showing up. I have never had people not RSVP. Maybe out of 20 invites you get one or two that you dont hear from, and they usually do not show up.

I long ago stopped the whole-class birthday parties. The kids enjoy it so much more if 5 or 6 of the good friends are there.

Good luck.

 

[C.Ann]

Very rude not for people to RSVP - especially when the event is being held somewhere that requires a "head count"..

DGD had a party at Chucky Cheese once (or a place similar to that).. DD and her DH paid for pizzas and a drink for the adults..

Glad your DD is well enough to have a fun party at a fun place!!

 

[laurie31]

I have had horrific experiences with RSVPing - or rather, the lack thereof.

THe last straw was when DD#1 was 6 and we invited the WHOLE class, so no one would be left out, and because she wanted a big party. Only 5 kids came. She was disappointed and I spend OODLES of money on goodie bags for kids who didn't show.

From that time forward, I have not put the location of the party on the invitations. It works like a charm. If they haven't called me, I know for darn sure they aren't coming! Every once in a while, someone mentions it when they RSVP and I just play dumb and act like I forgot. Heh.

DD had a Chuck E Cheese party when she was 4. I honestly can't remember whether I had to pay for no-shows, but I did NOT pay for parents. We did order pizza and feed them, and there was plenty of cake for everyone, but they didn't need to be part of the "party package" as they didn't need tokens and all that.

I Hope your party goes well and you don't have to pay for the no-shows. Call CEC and ask what their policy is.

 

[C.Ann]

From that time forward, I have not put the location of the party on the invitations. It works like a charm. If they haven't called me, I know for darn sure they aren't coming! Every once in a while, someone mentions it when they RSVP and I just play dumb and act like I forgot. Heh. .

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Very clever! What a great idea!!

 

[SereneOne]

I invited the whole class because I did not want to hurt anyone's feelings. She had wanted a Snip Its glamour party, but it would have been only eight for the price and I told her that her boy friends would not want to go to that and the girls left out would be hurt, so she picked CC.

I do not know the other parents. My daughter was at a center for special needs kids (she has physical defects) and graduated this summer. She now attends a school that is only K4 this late August. I asked the teacher for a list of names, but she preferred that I just send the invites with no names and she would put them in the kid's school bags.

I am kind of glad that there is not 21 plus kids! That is a lot of children, lol. I think around 10 is a good number, I just did not want to hurt any child's feelings.

Next year she can have her party at Snip Its and invite specific children.

Thanks for the advice!

 

[EMom]

So many people fail to grasp that RSVP means you let the hostess know whether you will or WILL NOT attend. How hard is it to make a phone call or send an email saying "yes" or no"? I need to make enough goody bags and the place requires a head count....So call and accept or decline, but do it already. We only invited the girls in the class, they've know about it for a few weeks now, and they had almost 2 weeks' notice with written invitations. Sheesh. Good luck, sister.

 

[Michelle67]

Unfortunately, my experience is that people seldom bother to RSVP these days. It's really irritating, especially when NOBODY calls and you are terrified that your poor child is going to be left wistfully and painfully waiting for friends and nobody will show up at all. Ugh.

I RSVPed for a party this weekend, and the mother thanked me profusely for bothering to call. She said she is going crazy trying to figure out how much food to buy for this party because so few have called.

 

[luv2nascar]

many people don't RSVP - around here you only call if your coming.

 

[EMom]

Unfortunately, my experience is that people seldom bother to RSVP these days. It's really irritating, especially when NOBODY calls and you are terrified that your poor child is going to be left wistfully and painfully waiting for friends and nobody will show up at all. Ugh.

I RSVPed for a party this weekend, and the mother thanked me profusely for bothering to call. She said she is going crazy trying to figure out how much food to buy for this party because so few have called.

One classmate called and let us know she could not attend because of family plans. I thanked her for letting us know and told her we'd miss her. I'm sending a goody bag to school for that girl, on the grounds that such good manners in a 9 y.o. ought to be rewarded.

 

[Amy&Dan]

Oh, I feel your pain. About six years ago, I had a Chuck E party for my son and it was the same thing. About half of the non responders showed, a few with siblings. I did buy an extra pizza and as I recall the people at Chuck E. Cheese's gave me some extra cups for free and some of the parents got soda. The tokens, well I had the allotted amount for the invitees, and not one token more! Those things add up.

I would call them and give them the number of responders plus about half of who else you invited. I am sure if more show up, Chuck E. will work with you!

I hate the way people have no social graces anymore. I mean how hard is it to pick up the phone and respond?

Good luck, I am glad your daughter is having a party this year!

 

[SalandJeff]

I'm going through this right now also. DD's party is the 25th, with an rsvp date of yesterday. So far, I have only heard from 7 out of 16. I'm hoping I hear from the others early in the week. We are having her party at the zoo.

 

[Kae]

I am still in shock about people asking if siblings can come.

I think if you would have invited only close friends you have gotten RSVP's but when you invite the whole class it gets harder. A few things to consider if you sent them to school did the parents even get the invite, could it be in the desk or bottom of the back pack? Some parents aren't going to let their kid go to a party when they don't know the child that well & feel weird about calling people they do not know. I still think an RSVP is a must.

Kae

 

[katiebrake]

-----------------------------

Very clever! What a great idea!!

Love that idea too!
I hate when people do not RSVP. maybe most don't plan every detail like I do but it is so frustrating to have such a grey number count!

 

[mjkacmom]

It has been my experience that 50% of those who don't RSVP are coming, and 50% aren't coming - call. I always get extra pizza for the parents/siblings, but I definately would not pay for a sibling to attend the party (and it's weird that they even asked, since it's an open place - I bring siblings to those types of parties, pay for their admission, and keep them away from the party crowd).

 

[SalandJeff]

I posted this earlier in the thread:
"I'm going through this right now also. DD's party is the 25th, with an rsvp date of yesterday. So far, I have only heard from 7 out of 16. I'm hoping I hear from the others early in the week."

Had to post again because I can't believe people....I heard from a couple of other parents today (which is good). But, one of the mother's asked if she could bring her 6 yo and her niece. It caught me so off guard (she had a very heavy accent and I was having trouble understanding her anyway), and I know her dd is one of my dd's favorite kids in class. So I just said yes. What is wrong with people. I think I would have been okay with her 6 yo, but her niece ...i just feel like she is taking advantage now.

 

[december]

My kids only invite 3 to 5 friends to their parties now, and we do sleepovers! I bring the kids home with me on Friday, then tell the parents what time the party will be over on Sat! That way, I don't have to feed Mom, Dad, little brother, little sister, cousins, etc. Their first few school age parties left me in shock-I couldn't believe how many people would show up with each invitee!

 

[happygirl]

Here people only RSVP if they are attending the event

 

[Stacerita]

I think its so rude not to RSVP. I actually have a hard time when I get an invite that states "regrets only". I still feel like I need to let them know I will be there.

And no one should ever ask if they can bring siblings and neices and such. That is just so terribly rude.