BIL/SIL and kids?

[dntd]

Ok, We are a Christian family and My DH's family attend's church together. My Dh is in a wheelchair but has taken care of our 5 kids including diaper changes. My Dh has asked on a few occasions if he could hold my bil's twins, my bill would reply his wife wouldn't let him w/o reason. Today I think we are washing our hands of him and his wife. My dh was playing with his 2 year old twins playing catch. He told my husband not to play ball with them apparently playing ball leads to balls being throw in the house, he doesn't want my DH to play with his kids at all not just ball. My Dh went on to play with a younger girl who actually understood how to play catch. We have never done anything to them so it's like they are treating my dH like he is stupid because he is in a chair( my other sil/bil doesn't treat him like that at all). Should we write them a letter explaining our feeling or do you think we should let is slide, for some reason my dh's brother doesn't even want to really talk to him it's more of an obligation as apparently there are better people at church to talk to.

 

[Mama Who]

I don't see any point to writing them a letter. I am sorry your husband's brother is being so awful, but honestly, the man knows he's being awful. Telling him so doesn't serve a purpose. Just hold your heads up and focus on more reasonable people.

 

[marcemc]

As a fellow Christian I feel you should just forgive them & move on w/ your lives. Many times family issues' are the hardest & most difficult ones to deal with, I don't think writing a letter would be a good approach, if you & DH feel that you must address this situation, maybe it's better if your DH talks to his brother.

Take in consideration that some people don't like anyone else to hold their kids period. This is unfortunate but it is their right as parents.

I am sorry your going through this, I myself have had to deal with some nasty stuff in my DH's family side. Pray that patience guide your way.

Good luck

 

[disneychic2]

Does he allow you to play with his children? Is it just that your DH is in the wheel chair? It doesn't make sense at all. But I agree with the pp and believe you should just pray for them and give them grace. They are clearly misguided in their thinking, but I think it would be better to avoid a confrontation that may lead to further disunity in the rest of the family. I'm sorry this is happening to you and your DH.

 

[dntd]

They allow other people from church to hold their kids, I normally don't stay after church for the treats with my husband as I normally am quite busy and as my kids are all children's church age I don't have to do nursery anymore though they attend tea. I haven't really seen them other then church. IDK it seems odd, almost like he feels like they are "better" then us. Either way I never wanted to actually join that church but our old one wasn't wheelchair friendly. DH started to use a wheelchair full time 2 years ago.

 

[bumbershoot]

for some reason my dh's brother doesn't even want to really talk to him it's more of an obligation

Not all siblings get along. Sounds like your husband's brother doesn't like his brother. He isn't required to.

I just went to dinner with my husband's sister and her daughters...out of obligation. My husband loves what he remembers his sister used to be like, but has really no interest in spending time with her as she is now. I would NEVER allow her to hold my son if she'd been around when he was little. And neither would my husband.

So...move on. Some siblings just don't get along.