Being a SAHM/D with "help" from the government?

[DMickey28]

I mean government assistance. Welfare, food stamps ... Not medical assistance for the kids. I mean actually money ... Not so much WIC.

I am not talking someone who is down on their luck or has unfortunate circumstances that causes them to need help for a little while. That can happen to the best of us. I am talking about two able bodies parents who are capable of working however choose to have one parent stay home but the only way they can do this is if they recieve some help from the government.

I know this could get heated. I apologize. I am just really curious.

 

[addicted_to_WDW]

Define "help" in this case. Are we talking welfare or WIC?

 

[KariC]

nope.

 

[BellePrincessBelle]

Nope it is not OK. If you can't take care of your kids on your own with 1 income then you'd better get a JOB so you can have 2 incomes.

 

[LadyJeanPirateQueen]

That's what I want to know..define 'help'. I have to know what help entails before I can make a decision.

Ladyjean

 

[DVCLiz]

I'm not sure what you are talking about. Do you mean parents having children and staying home on welfare?

My family has always had the advantage of education, so I think I can safely say we would never settle for the kind of lifestyle we would have in those circumstances. We have always been more interested in earning our living to provide for the lifestyle we want.

Then again, I'm not one who believes that SAH status is the be-all and end-all of parenting. I'd much rather have a job and a paycheck so I don't have to sacrifice a pleasant, comfortable life with room in the budget for extras.

 

[Nikel]

Define "help" in this case? Are we talking welfare or WIC?

Yeah, and I'd need way more info. How many kids and what ages? Any health issues? Define "proud?" Etc. Entirely not enough information here for me to have any sort of opinion.

FWIW, I was a SAHM, and we were on WIC and TennCare for a while. 4 months to be precise. Best decision we ever made.

 

[BellePrincessBelle]

Define "help" in this case? Are we talking welfare or WIC?

IMO either one is wrong. Don't stay home if you need ANY assistance. I'll actually edit my post to exclude parents with a disabled child or children.

 

[linda0706]

IMO either one is wrong. Don't stay home if you need ANY assistance.

There would be extenuating (sp?) circumstances that affect individual cases, but IMO if everyone is healthy...what she said.

 

[helenabear]

IMO either one is wrong. Don't stay home if you need ANY assistance.

I agree... if you are at home and getting assistance while genuinely looking for a job, then I won't say anything. Or if you are disabled and home, I have no right to say anything at all with that. Something along those lines I am okay with.

But two able bodied people and one choosing to stay home. Nope, don't see the need. And this comes from a SAHW. It is our choice to have me stay home.

 

[binny]

Define "help" in this case? Are we talking welfare or WIC?

MTE, WIC is a totally separate issue as far as I am concerned.

 

[addicted_to_WDW]

I am talking about two able bodies parents who are capable of working however choose to have one parent stay home but the only way they can do this is if they recieve some help from the government.

I'd rather they be subsidized in the form of child care so that both parents can work to support the kids.

 

[cardaway]

No, it's up to you to raise your family.

 

[DMickey28]

I admit, I have a limited knowledge of what there is for assistance available out there.

This is coming from an person I "know" who stays home with her kids. They are only able to make ends met by getting money each month from the state. Actual Money as in a check.

Both parents are healthy and able to work. The two children do not have any medical disabilities. They truly wanted to have one of the parents raise the kids not a daycare facility but the only way to make ends met is with welfare. They live an average lifestyle. They both worked before kids.

This is not WIC. I understand the need for that at times.

 

[Nikel]

Even after your revision, I still can't judge. When we went on WIC and TennCare, we didn't have to. My dh had a job with insurance, and we were able to pay the bills. Just nothing left over. And he was working 70ish hours a week. He took a new job, and because I was pregnant, we needed TennCare for the insurance, and we took the WIC also because we qualified. Once his new insurance kicked in, we dropped the assistance. Now he works 45 hours a week. M-F 8-5. And he makes twice what he made before. And I've been able to start my own business, though it'll be another year or two to see any kind of real profit. And other than a few thousand left in student loans, we are completely debt free. Definitely a huge positive change in our lives, but certainly not one we had to make. We weren't "down on our luck."

 

[BellePrincessBelle]

I admit, I have a limited knowledge of what there is for assistance available out there.

This is coming from an person I "know" who stays home with her kids. They are only able to make ends met by getting money each month from the state. Actual Money as in a check.

Both parents are healthy and able to work. The two children do not have any medical disabilities. They truly wanted to have one of the parents raise the kids not a daycare facility but the only way to make ends met is with welfare. They live an average lifestyle. They both worked before kids.

This is not WIC. I understand the need for that at times.

That is disgraceful!!! They should be ashamed of themselves. Being a SAHP is a privelge not a right & if you can't make ends meet on your own in that situation then don't have kids. /end of my rant!!

 

[Camicar]

What program sends non WIC money to an average family? This is what I am not understanding.

I know of many people who make too much money to qualify for WIC/AFDC who cannot get any help from the government because I worked with a private social welfare agency that sought to fill in the gaps for those people and it was HARD to find money for that help. And what help did come came from private sources (usually churches). Moreover, none of the 'needy' were living 'average lifestyles' -- they were all seriously struggling (even if the gov't said they made too much money to qualify for assistance).

So, I'm scratching my head wondering where these mysterious checks are coming from. And if you tell me, I'll happily tell that social welfare agency so they can get on this gravy train.

 

[CheshireVal]

I would say no. I'd love to be able to stay home, but we need my income in order to pay all the bills, so I can't.

I shouldn't just be able to quit and be taken care of.

 

[sanctus]

If your child care/work expenses would cost more than you're able to earn, then I say yes. Otherwise, I'd have to say no.

 

[Crankyshank]

WIC is perfectly fine. SSDI if applicable, also fine. Any other form of assistance, is not fine. Even if childcare is expensive - work separate shifts from your spouse.