I personally would save the money and stay somewhere else unless you really want to be on property. Paradise Pier started as a third party hotel that Disney bought a few decades ago. You could get a similar room for much less money offsite and potentially be closer to the parks. The walk from Paradise Pier is also longer now that guests can't cut through Grand Californian.
Park order: Universal is much much closer to LAX. I would do Universal first and then
Disneyland unless you have a flight that leaves from LAX super early. In that case it might be better to end with Universal.
I think Alamo has a rental office near the Disneyland Hotel? That may be your best bet.
Don't worry about feeling lost. DL is a much, much easier, more spontaneous trip than WDW. Honestly I think getting there from LAX is the hardest part. If you're on property and you get EMH every day than start at that park; if not, start at the other park. I would get FastPasses run out for Hyperspace Mountain first in DL and RSR first in DCA (these are next to It's Tough to be a Bug). Decide what show(s) you want to see each night and get FastPasses and arrange yourself accordingly. You need a FastPass to see Fantasmic and/or World of Color. No need to rush for Show FastPasses, it will take awhile for them to run out, and they don't interfere with your ability to get ride FastPasses.
Park Hours and Entertainment schedules take FOREVER to be posted but somewhere on these boards is a historical park hours calendar and usually they are very consistent from year to year. Expect DL to be 8 AM to Midnight and DCA to be 8 AM to 10 PM. Haunted Mansion could possibly be closed to get ready for the Holiday overlay.
Dining Reservations are 60 days out. If you want to eat at Blue Bayou, get a dining package, or eat at the Chef's Table of Napa Rose, book those ASAP. Otherwise reservations aren't really a big deal and you can usually get walk-up availability. Don't feel like you have to eat Table Service all the time because there's much greater variety within CS than in WDW.
Get there at opening. The first few hours after opening are pretty quiet (many locals can't or won't make an 8 AM open), and it's easy to get a lot of things done. Once 11 AM or so hits, it will get crowded and it will be a long time before the crowd lets up. There's a bit of a drop off in the last hour but otherwise people stay late.
Very few rides are identical from resort to resort- only the very newest rides or attractions that involve films are identical.
Get a Parkhopper and you'll have the entire resort at your fingertips the entire length of the trip. Hopping takes less than five minutes.
Expect and embrace differences between Land and World.
I hope you enjoy your first DL trip!