Some children with autism are not ever going to know what is expected of them by society. Autism is not just a matter of poor behavior that can be trained away. Should these children never go to WDW?
My daughter's needs have changed over the years and she doesn't need the exact same accommodations she once had. However, the fact that she has needed assistance does not mean that WDW was a bad idea or that she didn't enjoy it. We go at least once a year, and she lives for those trips. We wouldn't be coming back every year if it was such a bad idea.
Of course I know that autism can't be trained away and that all kids are in different places on the spectrum.
The part of your post that I highlighted makes all the difference. If a child loves it, then that is all that matters. In my case, I was afraid to ever try it because I didn't have a forum like this to see that other people do it successfully.
IF I thought my son would have had a good time, I would have taken him regardless of behavior. What I was really talking about in my post is toddlers/preschoolers that may not be able to express how they feel. At that age, my son would not have calmed down enough to enjoy anything. Even a local festival environment would put him over the edge and he would be hysterical.
It really does depend on the kid, too. My own brother hated waiting for anything as a kid and only got worse as he got older. At Disney or our local amusement park, he will wait up to an HOUR for something he wants to do, without any behavior issues.
I taught K-2 special ed for several years in Florida. Many of my students' parents had APs and took their kids once a month. According to them, they were like different children once they were at Disney. Kids who couldn't handle everyday stimuli and had extreme anxiety in day-to-day situations were thrilled by the rides, parades and characters. Disney is a special place, in more ways than one. Just focus on what works for your family and give up any preconceived notions about how to do Disney. I think any parents of little kids will agree about that.
Had I lived in FL at the time and had APs like we do now, I probably would have given it a shot. As it was, we lived up north and it was too expensive of a vacation to risk it not working out.
Totally agree. I found the parks to be a great place to practice social skills, communicating, waiting patiently, and so on. The trips went from being all about rides to just all about having fun being spontaneous and just doing whatever.
The good thing is that WDW and DL are "familiar" places and it is much easier to go back to them than try new places. We still do that, but in small doses. We do weekend getaways. Our first trip to a new place is usually fraught with anxiety, meltdowns, etc.
One kid loves the ocean, the other hates it. They both love swimming pools and waterparks, so that will be our focus this year at WDW. We did a
DCL cruise last year. We spent most of the cruise in our cabin watching movies. Kids didn't want to try much except the pool deck. By the third night of five, we were all ready to be done. But, once we got home, the kids couldn't stop talking about it, looking at pictures, watching videos, etc. We are doing the same ship this summer, and bringing MIL along so DH and I can do some adult stuff this time. The kids are SO looking forward to the cruise. Now that it's "familiar" I think this trip will be way better than last time. Such is life. New things are scary and stressful, but repeating them over and over leads to increased enjoyment and less stress for everyone.
Our kids have been visiting the parks since infancy. There have been good times and bad times, but over the years we have figured out what works best. It's all a matter of letting go of expectations and being able to find the fun in the unexpected places.
It was the same thing for my son as far as the more familiar, the better. When we did cruises, he mainly only enjoyed the pool and free soft serve cone machines on the deck. That was fine, as long as he was enjoying
something.
The common theme in all the responses is older children, not preschoolers. Even knowing what I know today, I would not take an autistic preschooler to Disney. Not just because of the meltdowns, but because Disney has everything most autistic people can't deal with. Crowds, loud noise, bright lights, motion, and confusion. I feel like, at that age, they would just be too overwhelmed to enjoy anything at all.
Also, keep in mind that I am talking about 20 years ago. My son is 24. He wasn't even diagnosed until he was five, and then only because I took him to Johns Hopkins and they happened to have a research program on autism. At that time, regular doctors didn't recognize it like they do now and there was zero awareness among society in general. I was told everything from "nothing is wrong with him" to "he's mentally retarded." His IQ is in the 140's. He was the only autisic kid in his special ed class all the years growing up. Now, I know a couple of dozen families with kids on the spectrum.
Because nobody really knew what they were doing back then, parents were not encouraged to accommodate the child. Instead, we were told that our child needed to learn to conform. Thankfully, my son is very high functioning so this worked out okay. To this day, he acts very autistic when at home and he feels comfortable. When he is out in public, he is tense but tries to conform. Yeah, it sucks that he can't be himself all the time, but I don't make the rules. He doesn't want people staring at him.
I can already anticipate people are going to say something about the statement "he acts autistic at home." I'm not going into details. It may not be a very PC thing to say, but if you don't get it, you're kid doesn't have autism.
