At What Age

[CamColt]

...Did your kids attend their first wedding?

I just found out my kids, 3 & 6, will be invited to our neighbors wedding this summer. I wasnt even sure if DH & I would be invited because while we are close with this family, we arent very close with the particular family member getting married (the groom).
Around here, kids dont usually go to wedding unless they are in it or immediate family. My kids werent even invited to their own uncles wedding(dont get me started on that one). While a part of me would rather have an adult night out to relax, a part of me thinks it could be a learning experience, not to mention a fun time for them. So do you think a wedding is a place for 2 young active boys. Oh and their best friends who are 6 & 4 will be there(they are the groom nephews).

 

[Krisu]

I would take them to the ceremony so they can experience it. Then get a sitter for the reception.

 

[Yzma and Kronk]

DS was 4 months - pushed him around in stroller at the reception! DD was 3 1/2. Lots of kids were there - they had a ball dancing at reception.
I'm sure the neighbor invited them because they wanted them there.
Just make sure you sit near the back at the ceremony just in case they get a little restless and you can then make a quick escape.
However, the reception will be fun for them.
You might want to have a sitter on hand for later - take them home (if it is not too far) and you return for the remainder of the evening.
I'm sure they will have a great time, especially since there will be other kids there.

 

[Mishetta]

We take our kids (DS 7 y/o, DS 17 months old) everywhere (weddings, funerals, etc..) It's all a part of life to experience. If the kids are not invited, we don't go. Not because we are boycotting though, just because we have never left our kids with babysitters.

All the kids I've seen at weddings have a ball dancing & then much later in the evening they are sleeping on two chairs which have been placed together. My 7 y/o is a party animal though. He never fell asleep at a wedding reception. He dances every dance too!

I would take the kids, especially since their little buddies will be there.

 

[MinnieGi]

DD (2 yo) has already been to two weddings and had a blast! There were quite a few little ones at both weddings and the bride and groom welcomed the little ones with special favors. DD did both the ceremony and reception. We sat in the back for both ceremonies and I brought crayons and paper for her. But she really loved looking around at everyone and was quite impressed with the brides dress each time! She really enjoyed the reception. She's used to going out to eat so the sit-down dinners were just fine with her and then she got to dance, dance, dance!! We did leave the recpetions a little earlier than we normally would have b/c DD was getting tired, but it was a great experience for all of us. Your kids will probably be thrilled to be going to a wedding.

 

[janette]

I think it depends on the wedding. Most of the ones we've been too are not as formal and children have always been there. I can't remember not taking my kids.

A few times they've had a place for the kids to play during the ceremony and that works out nice.

The length of the ceremony would also be part of the equation. I've been to some that can be pretty long and that is harder on the younger ones.

 

[disykat]

If the bride and groom invited the kids they probably want them there. I would have been devastated if everyone had left their kids home at my wedding - it was a family event and I wanted it that way.

I have actually only been to one wedding where kids weren't invited (and by that I mean their names weren't on the invitation). Unfortunately it was the wedding of my best friend and I was matron of honor - fortunately my parents were able to come from 400 miles away to watch my kids at home so dh and I could spend the entire weekend in the city. I think it was the difference between her living in Seattle vs. me in suburbia. That is the norm there, but I'd never seen it here or in the town I grew up in. Her neices and nephews were the only kids invited.

When my kids were small we just sat near the back so I could take them out quickly if they were disruptive. We also keep a firm hand on them during the reception and leave if they misbehave there as well.

 

[Nutsy]

My boys 13 & 14 have never yet been to a Wedding. They are never invited & I'm talking family weddings here, like first cousins.

At my own wedding I made sure all kids were included. I could not do that to someone. Actually we were even asked by some good friends if we were sure their 3 boys could come. I was sure, I wanted kids there.

 

[browneyes]

My dd was 18 days old when she went to her 1st wedding. My ds hasn't gone to a wedding yet. A friend of mine got married when my ds was about 21 months old. I had my mom watch him for me. There's no way I could've brought him. He was too much of a wiggle worm at that age (he's 6 1/2 yo now and is still a wiggle worm ). My dd went to that wedding though. She was 5 yo.

 

[Wendy]

I have 2 very active boys, 5 & 7 years old. They've both been to many weddings starting when they were each babies. My 7 year old in fact, has been a ringbearer on 3 occassions and my 5 year old is going to be the ringbearer in a wedding next month with my 7 year old being an usher.

Most of the weddings we've attended have had kids invited. I can think of 2 where the kids were not invited so we left them at home. We've always followed the rule that if their names are on the invitation they go, if not, they stay home with a sitter. Both my boys love going to weddings, especially the receptions.

The wedding they're going to be in next month though, is my sil's. She really does not like kids (except for her 2 nephews), and my 2 boys are the only ones that are allowed to attend. She's been adamant about that. I'm hoping they still enjoy it, because most of the weddings they've been to have had lots of kids present and they've had a ball dancing and playing and showing off their fancy clothes.

So, if it's a wedding with lots of kids, I'd say let them go. It will definitely be a learning experience and chances are they'll have a ball. My kids always feel so grown up when they get invited to someone's wedding. It really makes them feel special!

 

[snoopy]

We follow the same rule as Wendy does. If the kids names are on the invitation, we take them, otherwise we get a babysitter. The last wedding we were at was my sisters, where my oldest was the ringbearer - he was 6; and my little one was 2. They did just fine.

I had kids at my wedding, I can't imagine having left out all the special kids in my life. However, I know plenty of people who have evening weddings (as I did) who don't want kids there. That is fine by me as well. Its the brides big day, she should do as she wishes.

 

[tracyeliza]

I used to bring my kids and arrange for the sitter to pick them up in the middle of the reception. They love to dance! The floor always has kids on it. I love to watch them have fun. Then when they are gone you can relax a little. Now they are 14 and 11 and you can't drag my son on the dance floor!

 

[Kitty 34]

My boys were 10, 4 and 2 when they went to their first wedding (my sister's) My oldest was in the wedding.

 

[CamColt]

Thanks for all the replies. I just now realized its on a Sunday so Im assuming it will be a daytime thing. We will probably take them, but read them the riot act beforehand, LOL. What scares me the most is they would probably be ok by themselves, but when they get with their friends, they all get wild.

 

[Disney Doll]

I don' think small children belong at a wedding reception.

 

[rbuzzotta]

If they were invited, then by all means take them (no matter how wild they may get!).

At my wedding, we only invited nieces and nephews. There were way too many cousins to invite. One of DH's cousins replied stating that her was bringing his 2 girls (3,5 at the time) even though their names were not on the invitation!! My parents said No (they were paying) as they would then have to explain to their brothers and sisters why they couldn't invite their grandchildren.........we both have big families. MIL, who wasn't happy with the choice, told them not to bring their children!!! They compiled, but weren't happy about it!! If we invited those 2 then we would have had to invite about 50 others!!

Bring them, but maybe have a sitter available if you choose to go back to the house to party later on................

Have fun Katie!!

 

[The Sweetness]

DD was a 5year old flower girl with her 3 year old cousin. Thery were so presh! *tear*