at what age would you allow

[epcotfan]

Not at all. I don't think a child needs to see his or her mother in such a stressful and unpredictable situation. The hospital staff doesn't need extra people around to get in the way either.

 

[Shannon G]

Actually, I probably reacted rather strongly because I am biased since DW is an OB. Also, my experience with this will be different because she is a High Risk OB and has never been an generalist OB. And they get the most complicated cases. There are exactly 7 High Risk OB’s in our city – 5 at DW’s hospital and 2 at another, and exactly two more in the State, one each in two other cities. So DW’s group gets the vast majority of the very complicated cases for a state of about 7 million people. She delivers over 300 babies a year – more than any other OB in the state – and each of her 4 partners delivers over 200 (except for one that is semi-retired). She has literally, and without exaggeration, save the lives of no fewer that 7 mothers and 15 babies in the last month alone. BTW, there are midwives in her practice, so it is not something that all OB’s reject. But bad things do happen – moms and babies do die – babies do get born very very sick. Not an entirely benign procedure – to borrow a phrase.

Galahad, I don't think that anyone is suggesting that OBs are supefluous or unnecessary. It is undeniable that mortality rates of mothers and babies in childbirth are vastly different than in previous centuries. The fact that we can now identify high risk cases and proceed accordingly is amazing and wonderful. I would also venture to say that much of the progress that wer have seen is due to the increased awareness of the importance of proper prenatal care. However, in what I would guess is a majority of cases (though not the cases your wife likely sees) medical intervention is NOT necessary during the birth.

Both of my DDs were delivered in a hospital, but by a midwife. The practice I went to had a combination of Drs. and midwives, and whoever was on call when you delivered was who you got. If a midwife was on call, an OB was always also on call, for back-up purposes if medical intervention became necessary. Both of my labors were short (I'm very lucky!) and required no medical intervention whatsoever. I don't think that saying childbirth is natural has to be at odds with believing in the importance of OBs and their specialized medical training, when necessary. This may be a bad analogy, but think of a cardiologist...most of us have healthy hearts, and our hearts beat by a natutal process, but that does not mean that we discount the importance of that cardiologist when our heart cannot properly functiono n its own. Same thing with childbirth - childbirth itself IS a natural process, not a medical procedure, but that does not mean that we don't value the trained OB when childbirth does not proceed properly on its own.

bananiem - I don't think episiotomies are as common as they once were. My childbirth class taught us about massaging the area in order to help increase elasticity and help prevent tears. Some nurses and midwives may also do this during labor & delivery (and OBs may too). My midwife did this during my delivery of DD#1. I did not tear, and did not need an episiotomy, though I had a couple of "scrapes" (midwife called them "skidmarks" lol!) on the sides, and my midwife just put in a couple of stitches. (sorry if that's TMI!) With DD#2, no tearing at all, and no episiotomy. While there are certainly situations were it may be necessary, I think the idea that an episiotomy is always necessary has begun to fall out of favor.

 

[DawnCt1]

Yes, women have been giving birth for ages. But anybody happen to have the mortality rates of women and children during childbirth in the 1700's and 1800's vs. rates since medical advancement? How many of us have a "Died in childbirth" in their family tree?

You are so right. Its not a death rate that we would except in the 21st century.

 

[flminivanmama]

I agree with most of the others - I would not have child in the delivery room with me. But, I don't necessarily see anything wrong with it - just not for me! When my DDs were born, I did not want anyone other than DH & the hospital staff - if they weren't a Dr or nurse, and they were not there for the conception, I did not want them there for the delivery!

I do, however, have to disagree with the poster who described childbirth as "medical procedure." While it may sometimes require medical intervention (which I think is what they were getting at in their post) childbirth is not a medical procedure - it's a very natural process. When that baby's ready, they're coming whether there's a medical professional there or not!!!

I agree with everything Shannon said

not a medical procedure, nothing wrong with kids at birth, not for me LOL

 

[belle_of_the_ball]

Goodness Gracious!!!

There are limits!

Heck, should we also be allowing our children to witness the "Wonderful and Joyous" act that led to the conception?

My answer,
A definate No

hmm well...if you go into my last year heath class you can watch the "Joyus act" and the birth. I know...i had to...I dont have a weak stomach..but that was gross! Now i know they were trying to teach us about abstinence and stuff like that and what it would be like to give birth...but please...watching 2 people make a baby and watching it come out was NOT the way i wanted to waste my 8th period. I yelled out EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW in the middle of it....because it was.

Now, when i have a kid...I plan on being put on the strongest stuff, and not having any other people there but the med. staff and my DH (who ever that may be)

I wasnt in the room for my brothers delivery...i was at our friends...on the phone talking to my baby brother after he was born.

 

[DisneyPhD]

hmm well...if you go into my last year heath class you can watch the "Joyus act" and the birth. I know...i had to...I dont have a weak stomach..but that was gross! Now i know they were trying to teach us about abstinence and stuff like that and what it would be like to give birth...but please...watching 2 people make a baby and watching it come out was NOT the way i wanted to waste my 8th period. I yelled out EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW in the middle of it....because it was.

Now, when i have a kid...I plan on being put on the strongest stuff, and not having any other people there but the med. staff and my DH (who ever that may be)

I wasnt in the room for my brothers delivery...i was at our friends...on the phone talking to my baby brother after he was born.

And didn't seeing that make you think "I am going to make sure I DON'T get pregnant until I am at least 30 and ready for it!"

 

[cabmom]

Well, I had my 4th son last night and all 3 of my boys survived seeing their newest brother born!

Dean

 

[flminivanmama]

awww

 

[4greatboys]

Well, I had my 4th son last night and all 3 of my boys survived seeing their newest brother born!

Dean

What a sweetie!! Congrats!

 

[belle_of_the_ball]

And didn't seeing that make you think "I am going to make sure I DON'T get pregnant until I am at least 30 and ready for it!"

haha im thinking 47!!!! (kidding!) i wouldnt have a kid till im ready (i need my disney trips!)

but 30 does sound just fine...maybe a bit younger...

and YES IT DID!

 

[DisneyPhD]

haha im thinking 47!!!! (kidding!) i wouldnt have a kid till im ready (i need my disney trips!)

but 30 does sound just fine...maybe a bit younger...

and YES IT DID!

A good dose of reality can make a good arugement for waiting until marriage (or at least much later in life. )

Cabmom, congradulations. So glad everything went well and your family has a new addtion.

 

[Sandcass]

Congrats Cabmom ! That is so awesome! You are so blessed!

I had both my kids at home, so I had the option of having my DD in the room when #2 arrived, but I myself was just worried about how it would be. I don't think there's ANYTHING wrong with it tho. Lots of my inlaws have their children in the room. It just depends on the family. And I don't think it has anything to do with age, just what the child can handle. My births were not scarey, medical procedures. They were natural & beautiful events. Honestly my DD probably would have really loved to be there. And you can always choose where the child sits or stands to control exactly what view of the event thay have.

 

[julie_yet]

My mom was a doula and childbirth teacher when I was little. She was always very open with me and my siblings about where babies came from and even took me and my brother to some of her classes when we were little. She had a video called "Children at Birth" that she'd show her class. This tape showed everything, nothing was blurred out and we watched it from the time we were toddlers. It was just normal for us.

My mom gave birth to my brother at home with all our relatives there. I was 3 years old and I remember sitting on the bed next to her. I remember my mom yelling but it never frightened me. My dad and grandmother delivered him and my older sister who was 12 at the time even got to cut the umbilical cord. It was a very cool experience.