Several years ago, I told my 3 yo nephew to put on pants and he refused. Although my brother didn't think it was a big deal for his son to walk around the house without pants, he backed me up and told him to put them on. It had nothing to do with whose house we were in. He's told my daughter to help clean up a mess that I probably wouldn't have had her do because she didn't help make it. I backed him up when she wouldn't do it, telling her it doesn't matter who made the mess. You were told to help clean it, so do it.
For the people who think that sisters and brothers are allowed to set rules in someone else's home for their nieces and nephews I ask this question. Do your siblings all raise their children the same way you do and have the exact same rules, values etc? I'm shocked that there are no boundaries between parenting your child and your si
My brother and I have very different rules and expectations for our kids. There's never been a question though that if he tells my kids to do something or I tell his to, you do it. We trust each other and know that we would never tell each other's kids to do something that would cause them harm. We may not completely agree with everything we each do, but then we discuss it amongst ourselves later. In front of the kids, we back each other up because they need to know they have to listen. Frankly, we've never really had anything that we disagreed on that was really that big of a deal. He didn't think it mattered for his son to not wear pants, but it mattered to me, and he respected that. I didn't think my daughter needed to help clean, but he asked her to, and I respected that. No harm done. We back each other up in front of the kids (same as with a spouse) or kids don't learn to respect and listen to what adults tell them to do. You don't want a kid to refuse to listen when you are telling them not to do something dangerous.
Outside of family, I wouldn't say something to someone else's kid. We had a neighbor once who let their 7 yo DD play outside without a shirt on. I didn't find that appropriate, but they weren't family so I stayed out of it. With family, it's different.
Personally, at home even when my kids were babies, they all wore pants and shirts, or if wearing a dress/ skirt, there was shorts underneath. Not everyone feels this is necessary and that's fine. Outside of the home though, kids should be wearing pants/ shorts/ etc. Why is it acceptable for a kid not to, but illegal for an adult to be outside in their underwear?
A little off topic but not by much. My husband (2 dads) and I have a 3yo. We go swimming every Sunday. It's at our local gym and we go to the locker room and change into our swim suits and then off we go. Two weeks ago another family was at the pool (father, grandfather, 2 young boys and a 4-5 yo girl) and we finished around the same time. My son and i went to the locker room and the other family came in not too long after us. This is a MENS locker room. I was shocked to see that they brought the 5 yo girl into the locker room. They had her undress in the common area (where all the other men were undressing)which i thought was pretty inappropriate given the fact this is an adult gym, not the YMCA -- so not family orientated. Thoughts? Am I the only one who thinks that was a bizarre move on their part?
I understand that sometimes the opposite sex adult has to take a young child into the restroom/ locker room, etc. But they should, in my opinion, take that child into a stall, enclosed shower area, somewhere, or at least try to hold up a towel around her while she's changing. It's for her own privacy just as much as the privacy of everyone else in there. I've always taken my same sex 8 yo into a private area when she needs to change into and out of her bathing suit, and same with my 2 yo son. My daughter would feel uncomfortable changing around people of the opposite sex and frankly, I would feel uncomfortable in the same situation.
