asking for advice -what can i possibly say to my neighbor to make him feel better?

[newholiday]

It finally hit me today - whenever Ive lost people it was by sudden death (which has its own way of dealing with) not by long time suffering
my neighbors moved back here from Cape Cod a couple yrs ago. My neighbor's wife isnt doing well at all so they wanted to be closer to their daughters. A month ago the ambulance was here because his wife suffered another stroke - this time on the left side.
I saw my neighbor this afternoon, asked how he was doing - said not very good. There is no circulation at all in his wife's left leg - doctors want to amputate. Family doesnt want that. She is now home in bed on morphine.
A few wks ago my neighbor said he could handle his wife's physical condition but not how she was feeling mentally.
Today I saw it wearing him down
What can I possibly say to make him feel better? He is afraid to leave the house (and yes guys this is me asking for advice on how to make someone feel better) any advice?

 

[Connieh]

Hello, a kind gesture will help, offer to listen, maybe offer to do some shopping for him. Make sure you let him know that you are available if he needs help in the night. He might not ask but just the idea that you are willing to help is a bright spot for him.

Maybe take him a meal, he is busy with caretaker chores and might not be eating well.

Sometimes nothing we can say will help, but just being available, being there to listen, will help.

Good thoughts for you and your neighbor,

Connie

 

[fantasymagic]

I second what Connie said.

Could you maybe offer to visit with his wife while he goes out for a bit, like tell him you could visit while he goes to the grocery store? That way, he could get a bit of a breather and know that his wife is okay. Hopefully, he might run into someone he knows at the store and he would get a chance to talk a bit.

Pixiedust to you for your care and concern for your neighbor.