Are you tired of the togetherness, yet?

[BuckeyeBama]

Like a PP posted, I have worked largely from home for 10+ years, so we have worked out ways to be together while also respecting our needs to be separate. My boys are 20 & 23, and they have essentially been raised in a home that respected that need. So we have not really had to "learn" to be together so much.

When I first started working from home, we went through this. It is real. No matter how much you love and respect one another, you have to learn to manage some of these things. A ton of it for us was learning to really read and react to nonverbal communication. A look or a shrug can mean a lot, and how we react (or don't react) to some very small things can make things a lot better, or a lot worse.

For those who have never been in this position before - you can make it. Just remind yourself how much you love one another when you get stressed. And hug one another. Hugs - especially longer hugs - melt away stress and help us recenter.

 

[Kitty 34]

DH and I are retired so we're good even though I know he'd say he misses my little afternoon trips to the casino.

 

[wenrob]

Self-isolation has it's pros-and-cons, that's for sure. We were in Mexico when the worst of this came down and returned to 14 days of strict lock-down. Since then, our entire population has pretty much adapted to not leaving their homes much, so very little changed when we got out of quarantine except that I've gone back to work at my office 8-5.

DH and our DS(23) are in the house mostly all the time; 100% of the time that I'm here anyway. We've been enjoying a whole new level of interaction with our son who previously just used this place as a pit-stop. I'm grateful for it - I truly am. I hate to say this, but TBH I could use a little distance from my husband. By the time I get home he's bored and needy. As an introvert, I'm drained and have very little to give. Lord knows we're both trying to meet each other's needs and we're doing OK, but we're waaaaay out of our normal comfort-zones. I'm finding myself staying up very late in the evening after everybody's gone to bed just to have some "alone time" and the lack of sleep (4 or 5 hours a night) is starting to kill me.

You know that line in Frozen where Anna says, “The Sky’s awake, so I’m awake?” That’s my younger DD. (who coincidentally also has red hair with a couple white streaks) Since I can remember I’ve been getting up a couple hours early just so I can have some still time. She is full on the moment she wakes up so I started getting up even earlier. Then she started getting up earlier. I get up about 4am now. Guess what? DH has been moved to all day shifts for now. He’s up at 3:30am. Bless him, he’s trying to be thoughtful by laying out all the coffee fixings for me. I just don’t have the heart to tell him he’s jacking with my routine and to please just stop. He leaves for work and guess who gets up? What teenager doesn’t sleep in when there’s no school?

I love my family. I love spending time with my family. If I had my way I would have my oldest here too but I would really, REALLY like to have my two hours of quiet time back.

 

[scrhsa]

My husband was laid off last week. Over the years I have dealt with him being home a lot. Being in the Coast Guard he could save up his leave and take a full 30 days at a time. He did that, quite often. Even after he retired he went through several lay offs over the years. He's been home a lot! I really don't mind him being home too much. I just want the quiet of my home back He has to have the tv going all.the.time. All.the.time!!! Even if he isn't in the room or watching it. I am so sick of the noise. Not only the tv but his phone as well. At the same time!!! And we live in such a small house that I can't get away from it. And I can't even sit outside because all our patio is a cement slab with the hot Texas sun bearing down on it. Whew! Got that off my chest. Maybe I'll go crochet on the couch and see if he wants to at least watch a movie we both want to watch Maybe I can talk him into a walk. You never know til you try

 

[superme80]

I am an extrovert and I am so over my family. I love everyone, but I need interaction that doesn't include my family.

 

[Southernmiss]

Op here

It's been fun to see everyone's responses as we are dealing with our households.

Husband and I have been married 30 years this year. He has always had a reason to be out of the house for a while. Started the marriage with Army Reserve training. Then as time went on he referees soccer. Soccer usually has him out of the house a lot of Saturdays and several nights week for about 4 months.

He usually has a 45-minute commute one way. He has been working from home since March 15th. So that's a lot of time he used to be out of the house that he is now in the house.

And for the last 25 years, we've had kid activities outside the house. Everything screeched to a halt all at the same time.

We are both introverts and when he was working out of the house, he had other people to talk to.

Now, it's me after I get home. Our 18 year old is in the house, but she stays in her room with school work and gaming. And has turned her waking hours to night and her sleeping to day.

Dh and I are cooking together and taking evening walks together.

We talked about it all on our noon walk today. All is good. He even said he misses the soccer refereeing and interaction with other referees and his coworkers.

 

[spiders]

I think we are all having our moments but for the most part, I'm actually enjoying this. I'm trying to capture the moment as best as I can because I know I'll probably miss a lot aspects of this time once it's over.

I work in a 24/7/365 environment. I work a lot of weird schedules. That means missing a lot of BBQ's and holidays along the way. Right now, to prevent cross-contamination and due to a reduced workload, they've separated us into teams so we work 5 days and then we take several off. This time off combined with no school has allowed us to do a lot of the things that I normally say I don't have time for. We baked Mickey shaped sugar cookies the other day and I finally got out this projector that I bought last year and setup an outdoor movie theater last night where we watched some Disney classics -- including Steamboat Willie. My youngest got a kick out of Steamboat Willie. I thought it was really cool that Walt's nearly 100 year old cartoon can still bring so much laughter to today's kids. We also have a lot of golf cart/walking/multi-use paths around and they all go through heavily wooded areas. It's nice to get out and get some fresh air. There's almost 100 miles of paths here so everyone can stay distanced.

 

[missnic]

Just DH and I here. In a smaller townhouse, both working from home. The first week or so was pretty rough. I need a good amount of 'me time', which I'm not really getting now. However, he is a phone rep, so he's stuck to his phone upstairs. and I've got a laptop on the couch/dining room table. So we created some distance, which helps. I also have a super flexible schedule, so I've been going for an hour long walk every morning which helps a LOT.

I am SO grateful that we are able to work from home - not only in that we still have jobs, but it's something to focus on. I'm pretty sure our story would be much different if we weren't working.

 

[fla4fun]

I wish I had the opportunity to get tired of having someone around. I would be very happy to have some in person human contact. Be happy there is someone there to annoy you. Let them know how much you appreciate that they are there with you. Not everyone is so fortunate.

 

[RamblingMad]

We're driving each other nuts.

 

[DuskKodesh]

Hubs has always worked from home and I'm always here too, only time I go out is my job. Never tired of having him here, much better than being alone for me. If I thought he'd drive me crazy during a situation like this I'd have never agreed to marry him.

Now, portioning the TV time between us both... that's getting us batty.

 

[Snowysmom]

We are both working from home now, me 4 days a week from home and DH 5. I go into the office one day a week to do some essential work and that is my me time. I am an introvert and so need me time. The ride into work and the ride back are quiet with just my music playing. In the office there are only 5 or 6 of us so it is quiet and I get alot done. It is only 4 hours though and back home I go. DH says he misses me when I am gone. I like being with him but this togetherness almost 24/7 is a bit much for me. He is an extrovert and he needs to talk alot. Since I am an introvert, I want quiet sometimes. And the dog barks at every dog that goes by. It is also getting a bit too much being with the dog 24/7. LOL!

 

[NFLDERS]

We are retired togetherness now for 16 years!

So... we're good.

PLAY NICE ALL.

 

[Adelle Dazeem]

We have been home together going on 6 weeks and our home is pretty tiny - 1100 sq feet. :/ We have all seemed to separated into our own sections of the house. DH works and plays video games with is friends in the office. DD (13) holes up in her room on her ipad/school/facetiming with friends/practicing hula. I have taken over the living room while I work, watch tv, and nap on the sofa. I see DH and DD when they are hungry and make it to the kitchen and for dinner most nights. DD did venture out here to the living room yesterday when we had an internet issue and she got bored.

We are still getting along pretty well - no major issues there. My biggest annoyance is DH's insisting we cook almost every meal at home. I like to eat out - take out now, I guess, a few times a week. I used to like grabbing a sandwich at the deli at work once or twice a week as well. The past several weeks, I am lucky to get a fast food burger once a week and that was because we had a coupon. Both of our jobs are secure and we are not struggling financially, but he is a cheapo and it's really starting to irritate me. Last night I managed to get Taco Bell - but only if I got the $5 box and he wouldn't "upgrade" my taco to a taco supreme because he didn't want to spend the money. AAAAAA!!!!

 

[John VN]

No dh and I are still honeymooning to the point to were I am torn cant wait to see my friends again but at the sametime I will miss him

DW and I are still on our honeymoon also so it hasn't been long enough to become tired of each other's constant company.

Op here.....................Husband and I have been married 30 years this year.................

DW and I have known each other since 1st Grade 1956. Went through entire educational years in same schools and sometimes same rooms just barely acknowledging each other although we signed each other's 1968 H.S. Yearbook. We did not see each other again until a chance meeting 4 years after H.S. graduation in 1972. Finally hooked-up and married June 2, 1973 -- only 47 years ago.

 

[Lilsia]

Hubby and I have been married for 24 years. We have an 18 and a 19yo. We have no problems being together. The kids mostly do their own thing in their rooms and I like the computer while hubby likes the TV. But we don't have, from what I have seen, a "typical" relationship. We have never had an argument or a fight. We really enjoy each other's company and joke and laugh every single day. If we won the lottery, quit our jobs, and lived on a island with just the 2 of us, we would be happy.

 

[Forevermarypoppins]

I love him with all my heart, but he is a stereotypical rambunctious boy who has gone to daycare his whole life and is used to the structure and having friends around. With my husband and I both expected to work a typical 8 hour day during standard business hours, plus my daughter having school and dance at scheduled times, it’s tough. He wants to be next to me ALL THE TIME. Did I mention that I’m and introvert and highly sensitive? So all of the “Mommy, help me! Mommy, hug! Mommy, play with me!” all day long drain my batteries.

I understand!!!!
My 5 year old grandson lives with us along with my daughter My grandson needs Preschool and Daycare to open and SOON. He is so smart and I'm only spending about .5 hr a day doing things likes Writing Alphabet, online Coin counting, Coin worksheets, Thinking Skills. He not appreciating Grandma being teacher, LOL. For Playtime he's always saying "but I don't want to yxz by myself". On top of that when it's bed time its not easy.

 

[loves to dive]

My honey has worked from home for the last 15 years, but I had a full time job up until about 2 years ago. I have to have alone time. We have a 3 story house so when I was working full time, if it was college football season I would go upstairs to my woman cave and he would stay downstairs and watch the games. He would yell for me to come see something every once in awhile or send me IMs on the computer but otherwise, I had my whole day to myself. I also took lots of solo trips, he hates to travel, I love it. He was pretty clingy when I got home from work or trips because he was by himself most of the time. Then about 2 years ago I went to working 5 hours a day, 2 days a week. I had to learn how to be with him more then, I would clean a room a day and that would take a little time but other than that, we were always in the same room. Now I only go in once a week to pick up mail, I work from home the rest of the time. I have a little corner in his office downstairs (which he never uses, he works from our couch, ask me how much I love having a client call when I'm in the middle of watching something on TV, go ahead ask). I go down to work for about a hour every 2 or 3 days and darned if he and the dog don't think of some reason to come down there. Seriously, on the rare occasions he goes down there and works, we stay upstairs, is it too much to ask that they stay upstairs? I try to tell him that even though we are used to being together a lot, this is different because we HAVE to. I need a trip bad.

 

[DisneyOma]

I understand!!!!
My 5 year old grandson lives with us along with my daughter My grandson needs Preschool and Daycare to open and SOON. He is so smart and I'm only spending about .5 hr a day doing things likes Writing Alphabet, online Coin counting, Coin worksheets, Thinking Skills. He not appreciating Grandma being teacher, LOL. For Playtime he's always saying "but I don't want to yxz by myself". On top of that when it's bed time its not easy.

I know it's a typo, but "yxz" just got me laughing! Maybe he needs more alphabet work?

My husband is an essential worker, doing 12 hour night shifts 6 days a week. I wish he was home so that I could possibly get slightly annoyed with him. Not going to happen though.

Younger daughter is living at home, and we are keeping each other sane. We make sure we are both feeling okay, take walks together, and she's been so helpful and encouraging that I'm incredibly grateful to have her here. She's been cleaning the house, helping me de-clutter, and keeping things positive. I'd be a lot worse off right now if I didn't have her!

 

[DoryGirl1963]

Completely agree....WAY too much togetherness now that DH is laid off. He's like the poster's spouse above in that he has the TV on constantly. I've always been a person that requires quiet alone time to recharge and now I don't have one...single...second to myself . Thank goodness I work for an essential service so I get to go to work during the week but I feel like I have no "down time" at all any more.