schlepsnort said:
I read a few pages back someone commenting about bottle feeding and I will agree that maybe she didn't make her opinion in the best manner but what I saw as a result was just as sad.
It seems that breastfeeding Moms are very judgemental of those of us who don't. Some comments were downright snarky and equally judgemental as the poster who made a snarky comment about what you do.
I bottle feed, I have for all three children. As my sig states I'm darn proud of it! But I'm wondering, why do some bf'ing Moms seem to think it's ok to force their beliefs on those of us who maybe don't share them? When I was in the hospital I constantly had LaLeche bothering me and all kinds of bfing paraphenalia thrown at me left and right and it made me very upset. I don't bf because I have an illness that could be passed on to my child via breastmilk. So it is my decision. Yet I still get very haughty women who will treat me like garbage just because I don't whip out my chest for my kids.
I have my opinions about people who breastfeed beyond the age of 1. I don't understand it when my ped. asks if the baby is drinking from a cup at age 1 then wouldn't a bfing baby also be done with the breastmilk? Studies have shown the breastmilk over the age of one has no nutritional value to the child. Is it just a security blanket for the both of you?
Not flaming your choices, just trying to understand why you don't want anyone to question what you do but at the same time you reserve the right to blast anyone who doesn't do as you do?
I too would like to keep this drama free and don't understand why anyone who "has their opinions about people who breast feed after one year" would post here about it.
But here it goes.
In your case it was in your child(ren's) best interest not to breast feed. My dear sister in law breast feed her 1st 2 children. She couldn't her 3rd and it broke her heart, but she had bigger issues to deal with. (They found she had aggressive breast cancer when she was 38 weeks pregnant.) Sometimes breast feeding doesn't work. This is not about that clearly. I am sorry you have had some difficult experiences with people who are pro breast feeding.
Where was anyone on this thread forcing their beliefs on anyone else? ever? I must of missed that.
And breast feeding isn't about whipping out your chest. I know many women who had problems and pumped. It was a lot more work and they didn't get some of the benefits of breast feeding that do come naturally with the process (no bottles, no clean up, no waste, babies learn to start and stop when they are hungry, babies learn to be gentle because they can't bite) Still the babies received the breast milk from the bottle.
Thanks for the link Tinkerbellmama, you are right. There are many documented studies about how breast feeding past one year does benefit more ways then mere comfort (but that is good too). Breast feed kids do drink out of cups too. (or at least mine do.) In my case extended breast feed kids do eat also, just like any normal child, they just continue to nurse in addition. Right now my 2 year old DD nurses once a day. In the morning, right when we wake up. It is part of our slow weaning process that is lead by her. We have not nursed in public in many months.
The benefits were different for my 2nd DD. She has food allergies. To milk and eggs. I don't know why. I did everything "right". When I talked to my Doc about this she stated that IF I hadn't breast feed my DD the chance are things would have been MUCH worse for her. An allergy that is merely inconvenient now could have been life threatening. Because she was exclusively breast feed (mostly because I can't stand formula and refused to deal with it) she didn't encounter milk directly until she was 8 months old. This gave her a full eight months that she didn't have to deal with the issue. If she had started on even occasional formula it could have much more severe health issues for her. As it is even my Doc says she is one of the healthiest children with food allergies she has ever seen. Of course this is all speculation, but if she can't have cows milk, why wouldn't I continue to give her my milk???? I can't tell you how many people told me to just give it up because I had to accept her food allergies as my own and eat 100% dairy and egg free too. However I don't chose to continue breasting feeding past one year for this reason alone. I nursed my oldest until she was 27 months old. Once again she stopped on her own.
You are going to find many women who do feel strongly about it. Why???? Because it really is important and it really is an act of love to commit to it. Do mother's who don't breast feed their kids love them? Well yes, of course, that goes with out saying.
I can't stress enough that just because I feel breast feeding truly is an act of love, that women who bottle feeds her kids loves them as much as those who breast feed.
I do think they miss out on a great and wonderful part of being a mom though. Just like a women who adopts a child doesn't get the experience of being pregnant with that child and giving birth to them. It doesn't make then any less of a mother, but it is a different process.
Many new mothers have no idea how important and helpful breast feeding is, and there is a lot of drive to educate them. Because it is a subject many people feel strongly about, you will find strong opinions. The choice between breast feeding and bottle feeding isn't like the choice of what kind of formula or what kind of bottle. Where it is 6 one way, a half dozen another. There really is a big difference between formula and breast feeding and so the studies and education continue.
So that is my 2 cents. You did ask for it.
Oh and I would love to find the kids sized slings too.
He even wakes up like 2-3 times for it.
. JMO. So let's not feed the troll and be supportive of each other's choices (even if we agree to disagree) and talk about nursing toddlers and preschoolers! Yay mamas!
