Are our children overindulged with DCL trips?

[Mickeyhugger]

That's a thought-provoking question, and I KNOW that most all of our kids here LOVE DCL!

Another thread here got me to thinking though. A poster had mentioned that the number of Disney trips her family and kids have taken exceeds all of the vacations she took during her own childhood.

I know that many, if not most, cruisers on DCL are repeat cruisers. I'm confessing now that DH, DD and I will be sailing on our 4th DCL this Thanksgiving. We've visited WDW seven times. And yes, blame the parents. DH and I love to travel. However, he was an only child, and he went on numerous trips with his parents. I was one of five, and our family was lucky to do a vacation once every three years. Even then, it was a car trip, a few hundred miles from home. When I was DD's age (10,) I could not have fathomed the kind of vacations she has with us. History is repeating itself, with DD being an only child and her taking numerous trips with us.

Don't get me wrong. The DCL trips are creating wonderful memories. And I'm very grateful that we're able to do this. But do any of you ever catch yourself thinking, "Gee how times have changed. I NEVER had vacations like this when I was a kid."

 

[mommasita]

I most definitely say "wow I wish I had done it to". As parents, we try and give our children the best! I think most of us would give our kids the moon if we could. This will be our 4th in September as well, and 4 in two years is a lot. The quality of these vacations, is, without a doubt, unworthy of a monetary figure.

When we add up what we have spent on other family vacations, it is less, but I would rather spend the money knowing our family will have a Magical vacation, and the memories of each one, last us a lifetime.

My father was a workaholic when I was young, he NEVER took a weeks holiday. NEVER. We would go to the countryhouse, and he would come on weekends. I have no memory of any FUN family moments. That is another story. I just wish I could have some...SO, I think I am reliving my childhood with my muchkins...

SOrry, so longwinded this morning..

 

[ratfam]

I know what you are saying. We just took our second cruise, and commented on the fact that although only 6 and 9 our kids had been to the Caribbean twice, something we didn't do until college for me, later for my dh. We have also been to Disney World a few times and Disneyland once with the kids. Other than that (although I guess that's really more than enough), any travel has been to visit family. I wonder sometimes whether they have "peaked" too early, but I also didn't vacation as a child and I am glad to be able to take my kids, we make photo albums from each trip and they look at them often and I really do think we have created lasting memories. What I don't want is to create a sense of entitlement--we try to emphasize how lucky we are to be able to take the trips, that this is not something that everyone (or probably even most kids) get to do. Since we take these more expensive trips with the kids we really don't travel on our own, I figure there will be time for that when they are grown, so I also figure that although the cruise is extravagant for a child it is one of the few ways to vacation as a family but still have some couple time, which in our circumstances justifies the extra expense.

 

[SweetSpot]

I've worried about my children getting spoiled with the vacations we've taken the last couple years. I was one of two kids with a single, working mom. We went on one vacation to WDW when I was a child and that was it. My DH was one of seven and he experienced the same one trip to WDW. My children have gone on 3 DCL cruises, last year in a cat. 3 this year in a cat. 1 and have gone to many places always staying in very nice hotels. I worry that they are seeing too much too soon and worry about how they will be able to afford to live up to what they consider normal if they aren't as fortunate as we have been.

But then, I booked my first cruise just weeks after 9/11. I realized then how short life could be and decided that we needed to slow down and spend more time with our families. I am a mom of a special needs child with no family support who needs a break. DCL and the places we choose to go to are perfect for our type of family. Unfortunately, these places are much more expensive than other places. We are a family of 5 that need one large room because of our situation so that is more expensive. We find a way to keep our kids very grounded, make sure they give back and understand that they are very lucky to have these experiences. They don't take these trips for granted and in the end what they remember is the time spent together. We have made some of the most wonderful memories since 9/11 so even though I worry about the splurges I have no regrets.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

DH and I discussed this just yesterday. We'd much rather spend our hard earned cash and vacation time somewhere we know we're going to have a wonderful time with top notch facilities and service. We really have no desire to go anywhere or cruise with anyone else right now because WDW and the DCL work very well for our family. We make sure the kids understand how lucky they are.

 

[Mickeyhugger]

I've read each thread here and realized maybe the title of the thread was misworded.

I don't consider DCL vacations 'overindulgences.' We wouldn't want any less for her, and we have a fabulous time each time. We just remind her from time to time that not every child out there is able to take this kind of vacation. It's very well worth it to us.

 

[kris1973]

My DH and I have talked about this often and we concluded for us that we do the Disney Cruise every 3yrs. LOL it takes us that long to save up for it for a family of 4. Since we don't do vacations the other times we can justify the money spent. We also tell the kids that alot of kids don't get to go on cruises and they should be very lucky for what they have. So far it has not gone to there heads and they enjoy looking at the dvd the cruise offers and looking at the pictures we have taken.

Kristin

 

[noahsmom]

I agree with everything that has been mentioned so far. We have discussed this and decided to have a DCL vacation every 2 years. Because we only have one child we are able to afford a nice vacation every year. We could go to WDW/DCL every year but decided that if we did that it would lose it's magic. So on "off" years we go somewhere else. If we had more children we would not be able to do this. Since God only blessed us with one we make the most of it. He is very lucky that he gets these trips and when he seems to start taking them for granted we have a little reality check.

Kelli

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I've read each thread here and realized maybe the title of the thread was misworded.

LOL, have to agree. Kids can be overindulged without ever taking a day of vacation. I think circumstances are different for each family and if kids are lucky enough to be able to go to Disney frequently then that's great, but it doesn't necessarily mean they're overindulged.

There have been many threads here on the Dis about how families save and actually do without in other areas so they can enjoy these often expensive trips, my family included. Kids understand.

 

[ivanova]

As a kid growing up in SoCalif we did DL a few times .. WDW didn't open until I was a pre-teen and at that time it was ONE theme park, without much else in FL and with DL a couple of hours a way it never seemed like a logical vacation destination .. also "back in the day" cruising wasn't all the rage either and was either for retirees or singles (a la Love Boat), not families.

Now, had WDW been then what it is now and had cruising been more family friendly I doubt my parents (on teacher salaries) could've afforded to take us on those kinds of vacations.

But we still had awesome vacations (advantage of both parents being teachers - 3 months off during the summer when the kids are out of school). We thoroughly covered CA, dipped into AZ, OR and NV via car trips.

Is my daughter over-indulged / spoiled / lucky? Yeah, she is ... and I remind her of it all the time!!

 

[jillane88]

Although this will be our first Disney cruise for our family, we see it this way: we would rather spend our money on making wonderful memories and spending time with our children. We choose not to have cable TV, no cell phone, live debt free, etc... specifically so we can spend our money on fun trips. We've asked our kids what they would rather have and they always choose a trip over anything else. Time is short and you can never get back lost time.

Heather
05/03 Disneyland Hotel
03/04 Tahiti cruise on Radisson 10 yr anniversary
05/06 Disney cruise Western

 

[My 2 Princesses Boat]

I agree with everyone else on the board about this. We take several vacations thruout the year. Our best ones always are at WDW or the DCL (we've only been on it once, but not the last ). Disney just does everything first class! They know how to do vacations! With this we decided to sign up with the Disney Vacation Club. We always remind the children how lucky they are to do this. I tell them all the time of the hot summer vacations we will take to see our grandparents in a station wagon with 6 other siblings and luggage piled on top. I wouldn't trade those vacations for the world!!!! But our kids know there are some kids who don't even get a chance to take one. My DH travels alot, and this is why we go on vacations more than once a year, to get away from everyday stuff, and just beable to enjoy what we are doing as a family with no interruptions.

I have had a few family members and one friend who made negative comments of us traveling the way we do, but it's not their money, or their family.

 

[tecdavidt]

Yes, my husband and I are guilty of spoiling our children by taking them on cruises. When I grew up in the 60's & early 70's our vacations were different but my parents had a tight budget.

My father always took a 2 week vacation. In my early years that meant loading the car with suitcases, a camp stove and cooler. We would head west to visit relatives. We stayed in the cheap roadside motels and my father would check the rooms out before he would agree to stay at the hotel. It was a treat if one actually had a pool. Meals were cooked along roadside rest stops.

As the 70's approached the vacations turned into camping trips. When my Uncle died in 1972 I was sent off on a trip with my Aunt and cousin to see Walt Disney World's Magic Kingdom. The park wasn't even completed, I have photos from the tram of construction on tomorrow land. I finally made it back to World in 1999! I was 42 with a husband and 4 kids.

Times have changed, my husband has been successful in his business and this has allowed for us to take several cruises since 1999. Our daughter has grown up on DCL. We talk about how we should take one vacation the way we vacationed as a child but we just can't seem to go back..Our sons had a hard time when we took our first cruise without them--no more trips after they graduated from highschool. That also meant we had to start getting a cat. 3 because my husband was use to having two bathrooms. He always used the teen stateroom to clean up in every morning because he was sharing his stateroom with two females! lol. It is hard to believe our next cruise in '06 our baby will be moving up to the Stack. I still remember her tears after the first cruise when she found out we couldn't stay on the ship, we had to go back home. For her the Magic is home away from home.

Kathy

 

[chasbos]

We too are guilty in giving our 4 children the best lives possible! They have been to Europe, Disney, the Caribbean a few times (all in the last 4 years)! They are in private school and participate in so many sporty events it would make your head spin. A lot of people think we are crazy but I get so much pleasure in seeing my kids happy and it makes having our own business (which there are many days I would love to sell!!) and all the hard work we do worth it.

Although DH and I sometimes wonder if we are giving our kids the wrong idea about life. We worked darn hard to be able to afford all of our luxuries - do our kids just take it as that is life? We have always told them that they will have to get good paying, steady jobs in order to keep the same lifestyle - is this right? I do not know.

This year will be the first year that DH and I take off on a Mom & Dad only week - and then 1 week with the kids. I was amazed how surprised the girls were that they were not coming along on one of our vacations!

 

[alexandrew]

I am glad that I am able to give my boys wonderful memories that will last a lifetime......The scrapbooks DW have made for each of our cruises is by far our most prized possessions....

as for whether I am spoiling my boys, I gladly bust my butt working extra hard to make sure that their life is nothing but great, and that they have nothing but the best.......I really dont think about whether this will harm them in the future, because as long as I am alive they will be well taken care of....

Life is too short and there are too many ugly things in this world IMO....so I like to make my boys life as sweet as possible

 

[Stinasmom]

My daughter has been to Hawaii 4 times, Mexico 3 times, WDW 3 times, DL and So. Cal 4 times and numerous smaller (car/boat) trips around the Pac NW, British Columbia, etc. all in just 8 years. A very lucky child, and she knows it! (lucky parents too! I love to travel and didn't get to until I had her. Our first cruise is just weeks away!!)
We have often travel with extended family and usually with high standards/expectations of quality. She has developed very close relationships to other family members made stronger by travel experiences.
She is often called "mature beyond her years" by teachers, "so poised and polite," "very well spoken." I partially attribute these and other nice compliments to her experiences beyond her own backyard! She knows how to behave and what to expect on airplanes, in restaurants, and with adults in varying roles. She understands what is expected of her in varying situations. She knows more about areas of our country and beyond where they are on a map. She appreciates other cultures.
These are lifes' lessons not taught in school!

 

[becobscot]

Mickeyhugger- what an interesting question! I am addicted to travel. I think because my family NEVER went on vacation when I was a child. My son too is an only child and probably has been pretty spoiled by the type and frequency of vacations that we take. He loves staying in hotels, he is a great flyer and he seems to enjoy all our trips. Maybe I am trying to make sure he doesn't have the same childhood I had or maybe life is short (your time with your kids even shorter) and we should all just do as much as we can afford or get away with!

 

[alwayslisad]

What a great post! Up until 3 yrs ago - DH and I along with DD (now 13) would not consider a vacation. DH was a workaholic (3 jobs) DD was into cheering and dance and drama. Then I got very very sick. After 10 surgeries and over a year of recovery time - we chose to start LIVING. DH stopped the 3 jobs - moved down to 2 ( he won't let his friend down on the side job) and we started to Vacation. We did puchase a timeshare (which we are going to use 3 weeks doing a MIDWEST trip in June/July) and we booked a 7 day Disney Cruise with my siblings and their families.

Our DD knows she is very lucky - many of her friends are shocked at the places she has seen and places she is going. But she also knows we work very very hard for all we do have. She is frugle (sp?) to a point and will say many times " that is ok mom - put that dollar into the Trip Jar"

DH & I came from a family that did travel - but only that once a year - camping or visiting families. I went to WDW when I was 11 and that was it - the only BIG trip ever. DH did the same.

I guess I look at it this way - what memories I am making with DD and DH will last me a life time and someday when I look back as I am sitting in a rocking chair - I will giggle and remember the day that DD and DH danced with Pluto!
or danced in the water at Disney Boardwalk...

 

[jgalecpa]

Many times my wife and I wonder the same thing.

Our DD's are 13 & 16 and already on their second passports.

When I grew up we had coal for heat and electricity sometimes.

We were recently at a private dinner on a Beautiful Island in The San Juans of Washington State with a VIP and he looked my daughter right in the eye and said "Shannon, do you know how lucky you are?"


She looked him right back and said "Nope".

It's true, but is it sad?

When I was 25 and just starting out as a CPA I got a client who was 85 and dying from emphesema. He had over a million dollars in his estate, and I thought this was the most money in the world. This was over 20 years ago.

He told me his biggest regret was dying with a million dollars in the bank.

He and his wife scrimped and saved for retirement, when they were going to take "that big trip". But his wife got sick and died when she was 60 and they never took "that" or any trip.

He told me to live life, as you never know what is around the next corner.

Save, yes. Be reasonable. Don't go to WDW if you can't afford it.

But live your life.

If, God forbid, some tractor trailer is around the next bend, I don't want my last thoughts to be regrets...

When you see pics or hear about us going somewhere (Two cruises this year!!!), I can hear the old fella's voice in my head.

He was an incredibly wise man.

Jim

 

[SweetSpot]

Beautifully put Jim!