Are our children overindulged with DCL trips?

[logan1_2000]

Chubby 41 yr old "boy" seeks to be overindulged with DCL cruises and WDW trips. Available for immediate adoption. Don't worry, it won't ruin my values or appreciation of all you do for me. Almost all of my teeth are mine, I only need three prescriptions for daily maintenance drugs, but of all things my eyesight is still sharp, no corrective eyewear needed. This adoptable boy is housebroken, and always puts the seat down. Don't warp your own dear sweet children with too much happiness, spread some my way. Easy to please, no verandah needed.

 

[Blackunicorn]

This adoptable boy is housebroken, and always puts the seat down. Don't warp your own dear sweet children with too much happiness, spread some my way. Easy to please, no verandah needed.

Okay, but you MUST take my husband's last name, and promise to have children who will have our last name. And you have to call me Mom. (Mother's Day is coming up, sonny boy.)

Seriously, we found out when my son was born that any one of us could die tomorrow. Or today. We need to enjoy the time we have right now!

 

[lbgraves]

We did family trips for our big vacations growing up. We didn't go to Busch Gardens until I was 11 or 12. We couldn't afford to do alot. DH & I are lucky enough to be able to go on a DCL cruise every year for the past three and hope to continue that until the kids don't want to go. We have talked to them about how lucky they are. They help me go thru their clothes each season & pack them up to go to the shelter along with the food we put aside so they are learning that there are people who aren't as lucky as they are. They know that Mommy & Daddy didn't go on a cruise until they were MUCH older since we all did that together in 2003. Mommy didn't go to WDW & meet Mickey until they did.

I agree with others who have posted that life can be too short. We truely enjoy seeing the excitement in their eyes when they see the characters or even watch the DCL DVD. With DH's work schedule, the cruise has been the best quality family time that we have found. We look forward to them as a time to recharge for the next year.

 

[mickeyworld]

Here's my take on this thread- very personal and may it never apply to you but it may ease your "guilt"
Three years ago my husband and I with our two DD went on our first DCruise. We had the time of our lives with 14 of our neighbors and friends. We had been to WDW several times and my husband, who had NEVER traveled as a child, had become the total Disaholic. We had no business spending that amount of money but we did.
The following year, my husband was diagnosed with terminal cancer and died within 10 days. He never had the time to do the many other things he wanted to do, but because of that fabulous magical Disney Cruise, my children who were 6 and 9 at the time, will always have the time they spent with their Daddy on that cruise.
Do we spoil our kids? Absolutely, because if you wait- you may never have the chance.
By the way, we continue to cruise Disney, did the Eastern last March and look forward to the Western next March.
Live today live it may be your last and enjoy the ride!!!!

 

[Mickeyhugger]

Here's my take on this thread- very personal and may it never apply to you but it may ease your "guilt"

I hope this thread hasn't been misleading. I've never felt 'guilty,' about the trips. And yes, live life to the fullest. My point was these vacations are much better than I had as a kid, but even though, I still LOVED what few vacations I had, and I want my DD to appreciate them. I just want them to stay as 'magical' for her as we vacation so often. It has nothing to do with $$, or taking time together for granted, or waiting for the right time.

So sorry about your tragic loss. How wonderful that your children will always have that wonderful memory of DCL with their Dad.

 

[jgalecpa]

I hope this thread hasn't been misleading. I've never felt 'guilty,' about the trips. And yes, live life to the fullest. My point was these vacations are much better than I had as a kid, but even though, I still LOVED what few vacations I had, and I want my DD to appreciate them..

No Worries. This is exactly how I thought you meant this thread.

The problem of kids appreciating things depends on what is their "Normal" experience.

We have friends who have a private jet. To them that is "normal". They do take it for granted.

If I take them down to the pier at our beach house and have them catch some Maryland crabs, that is special. Cost = 25 cents including chicken.

I do agree that if you only do the same vacation every time, then that can become "routine".

We experienced that a few years back when after going to WDW (and staying at the Grand Floridian) the kids got a bit bored, because it was the "same" old thing.

We went to the Poly and they had a blast.

We do love Disney, but we certainly mix in other things. We tend to go on a big Dis Vacation every third one.

jim

 

[SweetSpot]

Mickeyhugger:

I never found the thread to be misleading. I had the same thoughts you've had and justified them over and over again in my head but this time posted the thoughts here. I'm thankful you posted this, made me realize that I don't really need to feel as guilty as I do because I'm not the only one who sees how special the memories we make are. This is a great thread, thank you!

 

[georgina]

Growing up in a large family, our summer vacations were always camping in a park a few hours from home. I have always loved camping and still do. As an adult, the first 10 years of our marriage, our vacations were to visit my in-laws in Wisconsin and Florida. Our kids always had a great time. Our first trip to WDW was in 1998, and while we enjoyed it, we don't go every year and alternate it with other trips. This summer it is Yellowstone/Grand Teton/Mt Rushmore. There are lots of other places I want to go. I think they would get tired of Disney if we did it as often as some do. We did an Alaskan cruise last summer, and they liked cruising, so we're going to do a Disney cruise next year. They are doing much more than I did as a kid, but I want to see a lot of these places I've never been to. Ireland is on the list a few years down the road, that will certainly be educational as well as fun.

 

[txaggie94gigem]

When I was growing up I was the youngest of 8 children. My parents were not rich by any means but we always went on at least 1 big vacation every year. It helped that my parents worked for the airlines (my dad in marketing and my mom a ticket agent), which meant free airfare and discounted hotel. One of my best memories was when my parents told me I could go anywhere in the world for my 16th birthday (I chose Austria) and had a wonderful time. We also made a few trips to WDW and Hawaii, but made the most trips to Bermuda (6) before I got married and lost my pass priveleges .

I learned so much from all those trips. We also did alot of camping which was fun too. My husband and I are just now getting to a point where we can do big trips for our family and I hope my kids can learn new things and have adventures like i did as a kid....that being said I wish they had DCL when I was younger...I would have definately gone there for my sweet sixteen .

 

[taeja71]

I agree with most of the posters that as the times have changed so has our way of taking vacations. Camping (roughing it) versus a DCL cruise. Times will continue to change. As we now think of taking a DCL cruise as a big deal our kids (when they grow up) will be taking thieir kids for a galaxy vacation to Mars or something. God forbid cruising will be a thing of the past. I hope not, but a flying cruise ship would be really cool!

 

[tvguy]

You have to decide what is right for YOUR family.
My wife and I both work, our kids are 14 and 18.....we have close friends, their kids are 12 and 17, he works and mom stays home.
We could use more time with our kids. They could use more money.
There is no perfect balance, but what we do is right for us, and what they do is right for them.

Having lost my dad to cancer when I was 9, I wish I had more time and more money to spend on my family. So save a little time and money, spend a little time and money, and love your kids even when they're driving you nuts. (ever been around a 14 year old girl with PMS? or an 18 year old boy who has 100 empty Gatorade bottles in his car?)

 

[salbythec]

Our DD realizes how lucky she is to travel so much. She has to be reminded occasionally how we have to save money.
We offered her a party for her sweet 16 and she asked for another disney cruise. We leave in 2 days

 

[crisi]

I, too, worry about affluenza. I know a lot of people my age (nearing 40) who had it tough (some still do) between the ages of 18 and 30 while they figured out they couldn't step into their parents lives. I know a lot of people who had bankruptcies - often over "meaningless" things like "but I always went skiing in Colorado over Christmas growning up" and "my parents always drove nice new cars." Seems it took some of them years to figure out there is a relationship between income and what you can afford to spend (and some are still figuring it out - I have a relative in his late 30s that declared bankruptcy - but had bought TWO new Landrovers and a trip to Europe in the previous year on his $55,000 income). Entitlement to buying "name brand" clothes, no idea how to clean a toilet because Mummy had a maid. The shame is that "relative poverty" hits them so much harder than people who never had it growing up.

Family vacations are certainly not "meaningless," but we can create memories on much less expensive vacations than Disney Cruises if we choose.

 

[heart]

logan 1--

jgalecpa--What a touching story.

mickeyworld--I'm so sorry for your loss. What a gift you are giving to your children with your strength and showing them continued joy.

mickeyhugger--I'm so glad you started this thread. It's something that my husband and I talk about often--ever since we pulled up to the "Great Wolf Lodge" (an indoor waterpark--talk about a kids' paradise!) and my then-7 year old daughter said, "Where's the valet?"

We know that we do all the things we do with our kids because we enjoy it, and heaven knows we're always looking for that ever-elusive balance!

Which Thanksgiving cruise are you doing? We may see you there!

 

[jrabbit]

but made the most trips to Bermuda (6) before I got married and lost my pass priveleges

Ah ... the things we do for love.
--------------------------------------------------------


Our friends wonder why we keep going back to Disney .... Land, World, Cruise??? We do it because our family loves it. We've spent a week in British Columbia, another in Yellowstone, another at the Grand Canyon along with many other trips to the coast or the mountains. But we do seem to gravitate back to Disney. Even with the crowds and lines in the parks - it's the most relaxing vacations that we have - and in this case "relaxing" means recharged and ready to face the real world and work again (DCL is by far the most relaxing vacations )

Our kids also love All Things Disney. DS managed to make it to Disneyland and or World 10 years in a row (I didn't during that same time frame ) Our kids do appreciate what they have, but really don't know how hard others have it. Wandering around Nassau, St. Maarten, Grand Cayman and Cozumel gives them an "idea" of what a hard life is like (we don't live near any large cities here at home and frankly they scare me so we haven't wandered around those areas when we've been on vacation).

Are we all spoiling our kids? Maybe. Will they be able to adjust to the real world once they leave home? Don't know. Depends upon each child and their temperment, drive and personality. One sibling may make it and the other will have a hard go of it. Our job is to love them, protect them, prepare them, and finally let go of them to fly on their own. WDW/DL helps us to love them and cruising DCL helps us to prepare them (lots of real world experiences). So I don't feel guilty about our vacations to the parks or the cruise.

 

[denise5374]

When I was growing up, we went on a family vacation every year. Sometimes when my Dad would travel for business, sometimes a car trip from PA to GA to visit relatives. However, we always went a different route. Before I graduated from HS I saw every state from NY to FL over to TX up to MI, also CA. Those vacations are some of my best memories growing up. My parents couldn't afford to cruise(nor was it IN) but we always went somewhere.

My DH never traveled as a child. ANd being that I live so close to the Jersey shore, that was where everybody went growing up. Ihave been to the shore twice(once for Senior week).

After my children were born, i want them to experience what I did. So we give up other things so that we can take two vacation every year. We don't do WDW or DCL every year. Is it worth it for us and our kids? Absolutely, my kids learn alot from seeing how other cultures are and other live. Besides in a few years, taking trips with Mom and Dad will be gone. I enjoy every minute and every dollar spent.

I think my kids understand it espcially when there friends don't take any vacations or go "to the shore". What I don't understand is that friends of ours go "to the shore" every year. It costs them more than if they went on a cruise. The place they stay in is like $2500 a week(not on the beach) plus all the food(that you have to cook yourself )

Just my 0.02.

 

[allears]

Couldn't help but jump in here too. My DW and I have often talked about the lessons we've taught our kids in the last few years taking some very awesome vacations. We've discussed this at length with our kids and often ask them if they realize how lucky they are and to our joy they always say yes. We have had the most awesome times on our cruises with them and can't put a price on those memories. We've tried to balance the fantasy of vacation life with realities, so our kids get the idea that life won't hand them these things when they grow up.

We feel very blessed that when we're on these trips or talking about them, our kids are very appreciative and really seem to understand the value of these indulgences. And if we didn't think they had a genuine appreication for these things, we wouldn't take them again. And they have to do their part, since we usually take trips through the school year, they must maintain certain grade grades in order to "qualify" for any vacation. That's kept them on their toes, especially since we did leave my DD home during a WDW trip a couple of years ago.

I think it's a matter of balance, we want to give our kids wonderful things because we love them, and we have to train them up so that they can be well rounded adults.

 

[marycaym]

I don't like to say "overindulged" but lucky. And I think my children know they are lucky. My 2 girls (ages 6 & 8) love to tell people they are seasoned travelers whenever they are asked by someone when we are traveling if there is there first time here or if they are flying for the first time. My girls are lucky in the fact that almost every 6 weeks we fly to visit my mom in Cleveland, my oldest is not impressed with the flight attendants or their "wing pins" anymore, over our easter trip to OH, she told the flight attendant "i'll pass, I have enough of those at home"...fresh little thing she is, she was on 4 trips, all plane related, before she was 6 months old!

My youngest took a trip to the local airport last year, and I personally think it was enlightening for her, she came home from school absolutely shocked that there were kids in her class that had never been to an aiport before, she wanted to know how they get to disney? how they get to london? how do they get to mexico, etc, etc. We had a very long talk about how fortunate she was and I actually think she gets it, after our disney cruise this past feb, she told me thanks and how much she appreciates me taking her, she actually said "thanks for going to work mom, now go back tomorrow so we can save for another trip".

That said, they are not happy that we will be spending 10 hours in car this June driving to the outerbanks....where's the airport they ask?

Overinduldged maybe but family vacations are priceless! Especially with all that is going on in the world today and with 2 parents who work and no family that is local, we personally live for our trips.

OK, now that I have justified all of our travels for myself, I feel much better.

Life is too short, enjoy!

 

[marycaym]

ANd being that I live so close to the Jersey shore, that was where everybody went growing up.

Denise, LOL at your Jersey Shore comment, I work in Jersey, my in-laws are in South Jersey and my husband grew up in Delaware, my husband's vacations were always spent at Rehoboth Beach or Cape May.....He has been to more countries, islands, states in the 10 years we have been married. Some girls I work with can't imagine going anywhere other than the shore. Not growing up in NJ, I am not a big shore fan...what do you mean you have to pay to go on the beach, I announced the first time I was there there, during college (roomates were all from NJ, come to the shore for a week they said.....) To me the jersey shore is a quick saturday/sunday getaway if the weather is nice and we can get a hotel room...don't think i could ever spend a week or 10 days there....I think only NJ people get the shore thing, have lived on the east coast 14 years and i still don't get it!

 

[mamalle]

dont feel bad at all. I hope we always will be able to take trips like we have and spend time together. I feel blessed that we can do this for our kids and have the life that we do. Life is too short.