anyone else disappointed with Valentines Day?

[Magic Mom]

Just need to vent, because I can't vent to my hubby. I know I shouldn't be disappointed... it was with good intentions, but I just can't help being so upset with what my DH got me. I should be grateful, because most holidays, if you can even call today that, I don't get anything.


Grr! Men! Thanks for letting me vent. I don't know who else to vent to other than my DIS friends. Today should be a spend time together day, which we rarely ever get because DH is very busy doing Army stuff most of the time, and I just feel like being off by myself and crying. Ugh. Stupid Hallmark Holiday.

I'll trade days with you. I found out today that Dh is going to Afghanistan again. He's been in Germany for a year without us and now he's going down range for another year. Our family summer vacation is canceled. So send me your spa gift certificate, I could use it.

 

[iwrbnd]

You know, me and my husband used to have this problem. He's a real romantic and I'm not. I'm very practical with what I spend my money on. I finally had to put my foot down and say please don't spend money on flowers, chocolates, spa days or jewelry! I need a new vacuum or whatever it is I'm saving up for!

When our kids were little he would say he had to work but spend the whole day shopping for me, putting flowers on the restaurant table and getting me things. Then he would call and say the babysitter would be there in an hour and be ready. I hated it! What I wanted was to spend the day w/him. By the time the babysitter arrived I had been alone w/little ones all day and just wanted to go to bed! Our Sunday School class read the book "Love Languages" and it helped us so much! We found he's a gift giver and I'm not. He stopped doing that stuff now, although he still sneaks it in sometimes. He can't help it I guess.

Some day when you guys are just chatting and having fun you might want to bring up some of the things you like and don't like and why. I didn't want to hurt my husband's feeling but it was good in the end.

Good luck! Marriage is always a work in progress!

 

[iwrbnd]

I'll trade days with you. I found out today that Dh is going to Afghanistan again. He's been in Germany for a year without us and now he's going down range for another year. Our family summer vacation is canceled. So send me your spa gift certificate, I could use it.

Sorry to hear that! Your husband and all our military are in my prayers.

 

[LunchladyDoris]

Stupid Hallmark Holiday.

So why throw a hissy fit and celebrate it?

 

[S. C.]

No I'm not disapointed with Valentines day. We don't celebrate hallmark days, it works for us.

 

[acejka]

I'm not, we've had a nice low key day with our pups, are having chinese for dinner and saw Valentine's Day this morning.

Hope your day gets better

 

[Magic Mom]

I'm not, we've had a nice low key day with our pups, are having chinese for dinner and saw Valentine's Day this morning.

Hope your day gets better

That sounds fun. Was the movie good?

 

[lillygator]

if you think it is a stupid holiday why are you upset?
at least you recieved a gift, smile, be happy!

 

[acejka]

That sounds fun. Was the movie good?

I liked it a lot! I know it didn't get good reviews, and I thought with that many big names, it would either be great or awful, but it turned out great and I can't wait for it to come out on DVD.

I did have a few teary moments from it though, just a warning...

 

[monkeyboy]

 

[GJM]

Originally Posted by Magic Mom View Post
I'll trade days with you. I found out today that Dh is going to Afghanistan again. He's been in Germany for a year without us and now he's going down range for another year. Our family summer vacation is canceled. So send me your spa gift certificate, I could use it.

I am sorry to hear that - I think my DH has missed my birthday the last 3 years with him being gone to Kuwait, or training with the military! Plus I think he missed our last 2 years for our anniversary he hasn't been here.

Me and DH don't exchange, sometimes he will get me a little something - but if not I don't get upset, it is a day on the calendar. This year I just got him a bag of butterfingers, that is what he likes. Last night we went to dinner when DS was at a birthday party.

 

[Nancy]

No I'm not disapointed with Valentines day. We don't celebrate hallmark days, it works for us.

same here. We stopped buying into all the hype years ago. It's just another day, I shopped, cleaned, did laundry just like every other Sunday.

 

[LuvOrlando]

My Dh got me that one year too and I never used it. Turns out he asked a female co-worker for ideas... not one of MY friends but some woman I sort of kind of know but who knows me nada.

Well I HATE other people touching me. The idea of it makes my skin crawl. A friend of mine would have known this but this other dingbat did not Well, anyway, I did appreciate the thought on his part but told him to please, please ask me first next time.

PS_ this was the Valentines Day AFTER the $300 Birthday gift earrings he could have bought me for $50 on QVC, again under the suggestion of this same woman. When he handed them to me I thought to myself, "Pretty but what a huge waste of money. that could have been 3 meals at WDW".

THIS year DH asked one of my good friends who suggested he take me to Chicago where a DF of his keeps a sailboat. So in Aug we will spend a weekend alone in Chicgo, & spend a free evening sailboat cruise on the Lake. Ahhhh, now THAT'S my kind of gift. Men should ask friends Not all women have the same taste, ut a female friend of the wife should be able to dig out good choice without much effort.

 

[aprilgail2]

Sorry, I agree with him.

What is about this ONE day where you think you need to be stuck together like glue? I just don't get the significance of a day on the calendar and why you have to spend a day together because it's February 14th. I think roses and chocolates were sweet gestures and thoughtful. It's no wonder that some men go crazy over this stuff. They can't win.

.

I agree! You got roses and chocolate and a"happy valentines day" why would you have to be attached at the hip the entire day??

 

[Magic Mom]

I am sorry to hear that - I think my DH has missed my birthday the last 3 years with him being gone to Kuwait, or training with the military! Plus I think he missed our last 2 years for our anniversary he hasn't been here.

Me and DH don't exchange, sometimes he will get me a little something - but if not I don't get upset, it is a day on the calendar. This year I just got him a bag of butterfingers, that is what he likes. Last night we went to dinner when DS was at a birthday party.

That would be a perfect gift for Dh too, well, that or a Harley. We don't buy into Valentines day either. We do cards especially on years he is away and maybe dinner out or a movie, but its not a big deal.

 

[Magic Mom]

Sorry to hear that! Your husband and all our military are in my prayers.

Thanks

 

[luvmy3]

if you think it is a stupid holiday why are you upset?
at least you recieved a gift, smile, be happy!

A husband is supposed to know his wife so when he chooses a gift for her it should not be something he knows she does not enjoy, or something that creeps her out. I think she has every right to be upset, he obviously didn't pay any attention to her when she talked about how she doesn't like spas. It wouldn't matter what holiday it is, or if he just gave it to her on a regular day, its not really about the gift.


I wouldn't say I'm having a horrible Valentines day. Dh and I didn't get anything for eachother. I of course expected nothing but I usually get him something but this year I didn't bother. We ended up going to the mall and dh got a couple pair of shoes so I figure I should get myself something. I'm going online and ordering myself a Pandora bracelet. Happy V-Day to me so I guess it couldn't get any better than that

 

[LuvOrlando]

PS, maybe I'm high maintainence but there are a few days a year I expect MY man to dote on me.

#1, MY birthday
#2, OUR anniversary
#3, Valentines Day
#4, Mother's Day

The rest of the year he can do as he pleases but if he wants ME to want him, then he must toe the line.

FYI, the other 361 days of the year DH gets very spoiled. I don't think 4 devoted to me is all that much to ask for and if so, too bad. That's just the way I am... before you feel too bad for him TRUST ME, he ain't complaining OP you are pregnant with his baby and I don't think it's unreasonable for you to expect a little TLC.. just don't expect it if you don't ask for it directly. Most men just aren't 'in tune' with this sort of thing by themselves, but the good ones will respond appropriately when asked directly. If this is what you wanted then say plain and clear, "I WANT --------".

 

[Poohbear123]

Well you did better than me...I got NO Flowers, NO card, NO Candy...I did get taken out to dinner to our favorite Sushi resteraunt, but that was about it...I did get him a card....from the dogs!

 

[luvsJack]

Well, I got the usual--nothing.

When we were dating he started this tradition of getting me roses. 1 rose for the first year, 2 for the second, and so on. Except so on didn't happen, he quit on it. I used to always have a card for him, cook a special dinner or plan a nice evening out to dinner. Got tired of being the only one doing anything so now I don't do anything and he still doesn't.

Mother's day he will get up that morning (if he is home) and take dd to town to buy me something. The only year he didn't do it this exact way is the only year I can even remember what he got me (a little Mickey Mouse from Hallmark that sits on my entry way table).

I have tried and tried to explain to him that he can just go out and pick wildflowers or get with dd and make me a card but he still doesn't get it. I should have known when I say his father is the exact same way.

At least I have taught my son's to do better!! They both had flowers delivered to their wife/gf, bought candy and jewelry. (and they both sent me flowers too!) Dd and I spent the day together going to the movies. (dh left this morning going back to work)