Any experience with a newborn cluster feeding?

[janey99]

If so, please encourage me!

My DS2 is 11 days old. He was 8lbs 13 oz at birth. I intended to exclusively BF him for a long period of time, but he is killing me right now. He is sleeping for 3-4, sometimes 5 hour stretches at night, but then pretty much up all day feeding every 45 minutes or so (20-25 minutes on each side). He cat naps for 30 mins or so and then awake again, rooting and crying. I think he is trying to catch up during the day for the feedings he's missing by sleeping so long at night.

Problem is, I feel like I can't sustain this for very long. I think I have plenty of milk (I am drinking a ton and milk is drooling out of his mouth when he unlatches), but I am tied to the couch all day long and totally exhausted, and I can't do anything for DS9, DH or for the house. I've lost 24 pounds since his delivery.

Any advice, encouragement, similar experiences? How long did it last for?

I don't know when I will get back to this thread, but any comments anyone has will be greatly appreciated.

Thanks,

Jane

 

[tzolkin]

i don't have any advise, just letting you know you're not alone.

i have three children and my younger two were both permanently attached during daylight hours. they would allow my DH to hold them in the afternoon when he got home from work, but that was about the only time i wasn't feeding. i tried to get things done around the house during that time. (that may be the only point in my life where i considered doing dishes to be a "break" ) they did not take any naps during the day, but slept pretty well at night. i was fortunate when i had my second child that my oldest was starting school and i did not return to work, so i literally could sit in a chair all day and feed. but i'm sure even just after a few days you're seeing how boring that can be. i read alot of books during that time and by the time she got to be a few months old i learned better how to multi-task. we learned how to feed with her in a carrier, so i could at least walk around (laundry, vacuuming, even shopping). that made things much easier, because i could go outside with my older child or do other things, but not sacrifice the breastfeeding.

it will get better (especially if they learn to take a nap during the day-- for mine that wasnt until about 9 months), but i know it can be difficult to adjust to in the beginning. many people i know who had this issue supplemented with formula. it doesnt seem like that's what you want to do. i chose to exclusively breastfeed, but it was certainly more difficult when you literally have a little person hanging off of you 24/7. keep us updated on how things are going.

 

[Jajone]

Infants will cluster feed for various reasons. Is he actually eating each time or just comforting nursing? He may be going through a growth spurt and needs to nurse often to increase your supply. The first months of any newborn is tiring and I wouldn't expect you to be able to do anything for anyone else. BF babies need mom this much. Rest assured it does not last forever and you can survive it. Try to relax and anjoy this cuddle time with baby as that too does not last forever. and a little that you get back to normal soon, if there is such a thing with kids.

 

[disneybridetobe]

If so, please encourage me!

My DS2 is 11 days old. He was 8lbs 13 oz at birth. I intended to exclusively BF him for a long period of time, but he is killing me right now. He is sleeping for 3-4, sometimes 5 hour stretches at night, but then pretty much up all day feeding every 45 minutes or so (20-25 minutes on each side). He cat naps for 30 mins or so and then awake again, rooting and crying. I think he is trying to catch up during the day for the feedings he's missing by sleeping so long at night.

Problem is, I feel like I can't sustain this for very long. I think I have plenty of milk (I am drinking a ton and milk is drooling out of his mouth when he unlatches), but I am tied to the couch all day long and totally exhausted, and I can't do anything for DS9, DH or for the house. I've lost 24 pounds since his delivery.

Any advice, encouragement, similar experiences? How long did it last for?

I don't know when I will get back to this thread, but any comments anyone has will be greatly appreciated.

Thanks,

Jane

It sounds like a little mini-growth spurt to me. DD had little cluster feeding spurts that lasted about 5-6 days where she seemed hungry non-stop. It lasted until about 2 months.

It'll get better, and this too shall pass, and next thing you know he'll be snacking on Cheerios.

Oh I must say, though.. 5 hour stretches at night? Ohh I can only hope to be so lucky next time!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

You are building up your milk supply still. Maybe a sling will help so you can do what you need to do while holding the baby. You would be surprised what you learn to do while nursing! I can cook entire meals with one hand! It will level off. I think you just have to get used to nursing on the move. Congrats on the new little one!

 

[perkinsrose]

I remember those days/nights.
You will get through it. It will get better. As long as you're feeling somewhat rested and getting somesleep, you'll be okay. If he's gaining adequate wait and wetting enought diapers--is the minimum 6 to 8 a day maybe???

I didn't use a pacifier with first child because i read so much that it would interfere with breast feeding. However, looking back i realized i became the human pacifier. As first time mom, i was so afraid/unsure to "unlatch" him, but i think many times he was sleeping--not suggesting yours is sleeping but i know how you feel with a baby attached to you all day. I'm not sure when the constant feeding ended, but I always seemed to need to feed him less than 3 hour intervals. I think the constancy contributed to me wanted to wean at 6 months.

I do remember those first weeks were fairly constant feeding and then i was engorged and leaking alot and realizing all that constant suckling had really built up my milk supply. I think the frequent feeding helps you not have a problem with the let-down of milk.

Focus on the good you're doing for your baby--those first 2 weeks of milk are so enriched with antibodies. And every day/week after that is helping health and brain development. I read somewhere that breastfed babies have on average 15 pts higher IQ?! Hope you're getting some rest and not feeling guilty about your older one. Wow, 5 hours at less than 2 weeks old --not on a formula fed full belly--I'd say that's pretty impressive! I hope you have a supportive partner to help. Maybe you can enlist your older child to help and then shower him with appreciation and praise?

 

[Maggie'sMom]

It's been a few years since I was going through this so my memory is fuzzy. Of course, my memory was also fuzzy at the time due to lack of sleep, but I digress...

Both possibilities have already been mentioned: a growth spurt or comfort nursing. If it's a growth spurt, the nursing will level off in a few days and go back to a more normal pattern. I'm thinking this isn't a growth spurt though, for 2 reasons: 1) he's sleeping 4-5 hour stretches at night. When DD hit a growth spurt, she was waking much more often, about every 2 hours. And that was measured from the start of the feeding, so she was only asleep for about 1.5 hours before waking up again. 2) Milk is drooling out of his mouth when he unlatches. For these reasons, it sounds more like comfort nursing. Hang on for another week or two so your milk supply is well-established, then try introducing a pacifier.

DD was a big comfort nurser. I enjoyed nursing, but got tired of being a human pacifier 24/7. I tried introducing a pacifier early, but she really didn't take to it until she was about a month old. There are a few things you can try to get him to sleep longer. A swing worked magic for us. The vibrating bouncy chair also worked. I wore her in the Baby Bjorn alot and she would sack out in that. Lastly, swaddling probably saved me from the looney bin. I couldn't get her to sleep for long periods of time in her crib without being swaddled.

Hang in there. It gets better. And there will come a time when your memory will fade and you will think back lovingly to those first few weeks when you were bonding with your precious baby.

 

[squirrel]

I know you said you want to exclusively BF, but what about pumping and then use a bottle once or twice to let daddy feed him and you could get some rest. You might only need to do it once or twice.

 

[Ariel8676]

My 3rd DD did the same thing..it will get better, i promise!!! I have to also suggest a sling, my favorite for this age was my peanut shell... http://www.goo-ga.com// or a ring sling from Jan here.. http://sleepingbaby.net/ Using a sling is a real life saver, especially when you have an all day nurser. Pop the baby in and go about your day..cook, clean, do laundry..and you can nurse in it!!! Good luck!

 

[MommyBryn]

There is a growth spurt around 12/13 days (the "2 week" one). Sounds like he's hitting it, since growth spurts often include eating a lot AND comfort nursing a lot (remember, in the womb for 9 months then out here in a heckofalotta strange places definitely calls for mama's comfort!). Don't worry...he'll go through periods where you'll probably wonder if he's even nursing enough!! I'm about a week ahead of you with my newest little one and she's totally different than her older sister was (who's still BF'ing at 28 months)...at her 2 week growth spurt she cluster fed for a few days and then it seemed like she slept for the next few. LOL She tends to cluster feed every evening though. She has pretty much slept through the night from day one too (VERY unlike her sister!), even during growth spurts.

It IS difficult feeling tied down, I know. But you can do it!! Soon he'll be to where he probably won't be nursing but every couple/few hours and you'll be able to do so much more! It's TOTALLY worth the first weeks where it feels like he's just permanently attached to your ****!!

 

[bumbershoot]

"I am tied to the couch all day long and totally exhausted, and I can't do anything for DS9, DH or for the house. I've lost 24 pounds since his delivery.
"

You shouldn't be doing anything for anyone else, you have a brand new soul to take care of. Your husband had his infancy taken care of, and you took care of your 9 year old...now it's time for this itty baby, and for you to also take care of YOU. And as for the house, well, that's where the 9 year old and the husband get to help out.

I didn't have a choice but to sit with my son, b/c of various reasons I could barely move for quite a long time, and had NO interest in moving or doing anything around the house (I wasn't depressed, there were other physical things going on). And no one felt that I should, so I just sat on "the green chair" with my son as he nursed then slept, nursed then slept (with the occasional dipe change in there), as I re-read the Harry Potter books that were out at that time. Oh I got so much reading done!

If I could have moved, I would have used a sling (though I never really got the hang of nursing with a sling so I would have had to walk around topless for it...depending on what your house is like, you might not be able to do that with a 9 year old around) to wander around the house.

But as it was, I loved the time I spent with my guy. Nursing him at that time was nearly all I could do for him, and although he was more bonded with my husband for quite awhile, all of that nursing kept us together and bonded in a very special way that lasts and lasts.


As for the baby sleeping so long...do you have baby in bed with you, or side-carred next to the bed, at night? If not, DO. Although some are ecstatic to have a baby sleeping so long at the beginning, I strongly believe it's very unnatural. If baby is next to you at night, baby will likely sleep a bit less deeply (which is GOOD...babies sleeping too deeply is a bit scary) and will smell the milk, and will very likely wake up to nurse a bit more. That will take some pressure off during the day (unless your baby is like mine was...if he didn't keep falling asleep the kid probably would have been attached 24/7, not just FEEL like he was!).

Or it could just be one of the first of many growth spurts! With my guy, he would be even more voracious than usual for several very long days, then he would take a massive nap or two, and then he would be visibly bigger in some way. It was always o cool to practically SEE him grow.


Oh and my biggest advice for feeling OK while nursing is to make sure you're drinking lots of water. I would make milk no matter what was going on with me, no matter how long I went without water, but if I did that I felt heinous. Miserable, awful, no good, bad.

Oh, and I lost 25 lbs in 2 weeks, too. Baby arrived May 26th and that weight just DROPPED (I gained 60 lbs, though, so I wasn't done) . But I didn't consider it to be a bad thing!!!!!


Have fun!!!!!

 

[MommyBryn]

As for the baby sleeping so long...do you have baby in bed with you, or side-carred next to the bed, at night? If not, DO. Although some are ecstatic to have a baby sleeping so long at the beginning, I strongly believe it's very unnatural. If baby is next to you at night, baby will likely sleep a bit less deeply (which is GOOD...babies sleeping too deeply is a bit scary) and will smell the milk, and will very likely wake up to nurse a bit more.

I tend to agree, especially early on. My new baby only wakes once in the night and it FREAKS me out, because I've done plenty of reading on baby sleep and fear her sleeping too deeply. People say be thankful but honestly, I'm SO used to waking throughout the night anyway and I still wake regularly to check on her so she might as well be eating every couple hours!! However, we cosleep so I'm able to see that she does rouse herself regularly through the night, even though she won't eat until that ONE time around 3-4 a.m. Thankfully my supply isn't taking a hit though since my 28 month old still cosleeps and is still a mama's milk kiddo.

 

[tanyaandallie]

You are only 11 days pp. Even if you were not bf, your baby would be wanting to eat constantly, be held constantly, etc. Stick with it. You can get through this and things will get easier. If you are getting a 3 to 4 hour stretch at night, you should count your blessings!!!! Niether of mine slept that long for many many many months!!!

Don't give up. I know it's hard, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel and it will get better. I agree with whoever said you should be doing nothing. You need to some serious adjusting of your expectations. You should not be taking care of anyone but yourself and your baby. Your oldest is 9 and likely pretty self sufficient. The constant feeding will not last forever. Your family can deal with you sititng on the couch all day! Just sit and take care of yourself and your baby!

 

[K and K's Mommy]

He sounds just like 2 of my 3. It will get better, but I usually say not until about month 3 did I feel any sense of normalcy.

My doctor said to wake and feed newborns at least every 4 hours. Only with my DD did I have to set an alarm. The boys were 2-3 hours around the clock! Co-sleeping scared me so we had the babies in a cradle by our bed.

I remember feeling so guilty about my oldest when number 2 was born. Have your husband hold the baby for awhile so you can spend some one on one time with your oldest. Your DH is big enough to understand, and your house can wait! Take time to enjoy the new baby!

Nursing is hard at first, but it gets easier! My youngest had the occasional bottle and was weaned at 9 months. I think he is the smartest of all, but he is also the meanest. So, it is okay to give some formula, but see if you can wait until the 4 week mark so your milk is better established.

Best of luck!

 

[MomtoAlexnWilliam]

Hang in there! You'll wish for those days again. Let your DH take care of the house and your 9 year old for awhile. Rest when you can and just snuggle that newborn.

As for sleeping up to 5 hours, I wouldn't worry a bit about that as long as he is gaining weight. My doctor always said "let sleeping babes sleep" when they are gaining weight. My DD began sleeping through the night at 6 weeks and is fine. (DS took 18 months to sleep through the night!) Now...being the paranoid mom I am I checked on her numerous times to check her breathing -- we coslept with her in the bed and used a co-sleeper right next to me with DS.

Congrats on your bundle of joy.

 

[tkme4ard]

keep repeating this too shall pass! Seriously set a time clock and just say that I can get through this week, this day and just keep taking it one day at a time. We all understand that it's overwhelming and I promise it does get better/easier. Its a huge adjustment for everyone. I would try a pacifier to see if he'll take it but honestly if he's hungry he's hungry LOL

with my last baby my bff wanted a pic of the family before she left but the baby wouldn't NOT stop bfing long enough to get a good shot so we have one family picture of us all on my bed with Gabby in the football hold :lol:

 

[mommy-on-the-move]

I think Bumbershoot summed it up for me perfectly- your DH is more than capable of keeping the house clean (if not tidy) and at age 9 your son is old enough to be helping out too... my eldest was nearly 6, nearly 7 and 9 when her siblings arrived and she was more than capable of fetching her own drinks, snacks, preparing her own school stuff- even helping me out with the babies (actually her youngest brother at a few days old had a full breast-fed baby diaper blow out, like only a BF baby could and she had to come help as I was laughing too hard to hold him, get clothes off, wash him down etc on my own... she's a brave girl, she'll make a fabulous mother alongside whatever career she choses) do NOT feel guilty about the house sliding a little or no doing what people are used to you doing, even if you were formula feeding at 11days PP you should not be taking care of everyone else- they should be taking care of you! In fact in England all men get 2 full weeks paid paternity leave on the birth of a child for this express reason- mom shouldn't be running around after older children or the house during that time. Do you have any family or neighbours who will come in and help out? Maybe cook a meal, take over the school-run for a while, that sort of thing? I also used sitting down nursing as a time to help the older ones with reading, homework or generally chatting.

My youngest was born a week before christmas 2006 and by new years day i felt like he was attached 24-7 but luckily a good friend had told me "expect the first 6 weeks to be hell, you make it that far you'll stick it forever" ... we're at 18months nursing now but back in the first few days I would never, ever have believed i'd be here! 2 weeks is a very normal growth spurt for cluster feeding.

As everyone else has said it's a big adjustment but it does get better and for us it's made life easier for everyone- I can travel so much easier because we BF, unexpected trips into school are no problem as it doesn't matter we've not got a bottle with us, getting stuck in traffic on long journeys again, no panic about not having enough formula as milk is on mom LOL It really is worth it.

On thing I found was nights were the worst for me- so DH woke everytime to feed with me and sat up with me for encouragement in the early days, also when i did want to give up in the middle of the night and get a bottle he encouraged me to give it until morning and by the time morning rolled around i was ready to keep fighting.

 

[PebblesMom]

My DS is 6 months old now, and I still remember those first few days! It is HARD. Everyone here pretty much sums up what advice I can give, but just don't be too tough on yourself. The housework can wait, and maybe now would be a great time for some Dad/Big Brother time. I was 9 when my little brother was born, and it was nice to have that time with my Dad.

 

[santa's surpriz]

Is your dilemma the actual breast feeding bonding or the extra benefits your baby gets from breast milk? You can try to pump and bottle the milk. That you you can measure exactly how much the baby is getting. It is possible that he may not be getting as much as you think and you explain why he is always hungry. I feared this when I was bf my daughter and ended up pumping and freezing for about 9 months.

 

[Jenvenza]

Ahh, it iseems like it was just yesterday when my DD was cluster feeding. She is 10 months old now. My only advice would be to tell you to stick it out, and it will stop eventually. I know it is hard when you are BFing, and they cluster feed, but at least you are making enough milk - I wasnt so lucky in that department! Your little one might be going through a little growth spurt, and cluster feedings dont normally last more than a few days at a time.

Good luck and congrats on your new baby!