anxiety

[clori]

I posted a while ago. Quick refresher - my dd11 had a psychological eval that says mood disorder nos and anxiety, a neuropsych eval that says anxiety and asperger's traits but too social to actually have that diagnosis. She also has auditory and tactile hypersensitivity based on school ot eval. We found out last summer that dd has a mild to moderate sensory neural loss in one ear. We have an appointment coming up to recheck hearing and I want to ask about some things like being overly bothered by loud sounds or even quiet sounds like breathing. DD can be very rigid in her beliefs. Academically dd gets As/Bs. She doesn't have an iep but most teachers are aware of mild to moderate sensory neural hearing loss in 1 ear.

Saturday we went to the mall. The alarm went off, dd covered her ears saying she couldn't stand the noise so we quickly left. Then dd wanted to know why fire alarm went off but I don't know why. Today we went back since we didn't get to shop before. Just our luck - fire alarm went off and this time the mall was evacuated - still don't know why. Now dd is saying she will never go back to the mall again. While I understand the annoyance I don't want her afraid to go back. Should we avoid the mall for a few months or is it better to return soon.

Also dd is very anxious about cafeteria next school year since a friend is leaving the school. She hates the noise there. This year she has band twice a week so only goes 10-15 minutes those 2 days during recess time (she is fine with that) and once a week usually skips it due to lunch bunch (only unofficial service she gets). Due to friend's schedule she has lunch with her 1 day a week which helps so only 1 day to deal with. Next year may be two days and a new vp who isn't aware of noise sensitivity. DD does have vp's permission (retiring end of summer) to leave to go to his office if needed but never has.

 

[bookwormde]

"too social to actually have that diagnosis"

This is the "standard" reason that clinicians who are not highly compitent and experianced with girls give for not giving a diagnosis

Call Yale chld study center and find out who they would reccommend to do an evaluation.

Just because she self adapts and presents as resonably socially compitent does not demonstrate that she does it "typically" and the effort that this requires is one of the major sources of anxiety. She needs all the support that are needed in the EF, social and sensory areas if she is to be healthy and be able to share her gifts.

bookwormde

 

[Goofygirl17]

This sounds so much like my DD11. We are trying to find the correct diagnosis so we can have the correct treatment (for the anxiety and panic). She is sooo socially aware and tries to fit in with everyone. She has many friends but I know it's work for her. She has very black and white thinking and gets mad when someone "breaks a rule" by lying or saying one thing and doing another. She has lost friends over small situations because she keeps saying but they...

I don't mean to hijack the thread but bookwormde- do you have any books or resources to recommend specifically for girls with aspergers?

Thanks so much!

 

[Singledad]

At the school my DD goes to there are a few other loud sensitive kids, two of them regularly wear noise canceling headphones in the lunchroom/gym. here is an example of one type: http://www.envirosafetyproducts.com/peltor-junior-earmuffs.html

perhaps these could be used in the lunch room for DD? Could really help her overcome being scared of the mall as well, if she could wear something like this so she knows that even if the alarm sounds, it will not hurt as much.

As for the mall and when to go, I'd call someone in connection to the mall and ask why the alarms went off, and explain the situation of trying to figure out when it would be safe to go with your child who doesn't do well with alarms like that.

 

[bookwormde]

http://www.amazon.com/Aspergers-Girls-Tony-Attwood/dp/193256540X

http://www.amazon.com/Aspergirls-Em...8261/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1306491444&sr=8-4

bookwormde

 

[GraceLuvsWDW]

My dd also has anxiety issues (as part of her Asperger's diagnosis). We have the same issues you are referring to a much more significant degree. My dd is hesitant to leave the house many days but once I can encourage her to get out and do something she is better and can have fun. It is quite difficult but you HAVE to make sure your child sees you as an advocate/safe person and trusts you to protect her from harm. I can see why the fire alarm/evacuation of the mall would be a severely anxious situation. You can talk to her about how that rarely ever happens and discuss how she was fine and you were there to protect her and that you would never let any harm come to her. But I would wait a while before I took her back. Let the severity of the event fade a bit. Try to find a fun event at the mall that she would especially enjoy to reintegrate.

I am senitive to my dd's anxiety and I am always trying to gauge when to push her and when to let her refuse. It's not easy. But anxiety is a physiological issue and she is not "imagining" it. Try to keep in mind how difficult it must be for her and how every little step in the right direction (or an event that goes panic-free) is a reason to give her much praise and accolades. IMO you must never punish any anxiety produced behavior, only praise, praise, and more praise for her successes.

As far as the cafeteria, I would make sure there is a "safe place" she can retreat to if she doesn't want to go to the cafeteria. Sometimes they allow kids to go to the library or a counselor's office.