Another ? for parents of adult children (vacation)

[hereyago]

Our first and only real vacation was when I was about 20? We went to Tennessee for a few days then to Orlando. DM stayed in the hotel room most time, I have no idea why she even bothered.

DF and I went to UA and Sea World and had a wonderful time. They were gone for a couple days to visit my DAunt who had moved to Florida, so I went to Magic Kingdom and Epcot myself.

DF paid for my airfare. I paid for rental cars, I got a discount at the hotels. It was the Best time!!!!!

 

[Pakey]

My sons are 35, 31 and 29. The oldest two are married. Every other year my husband and I take the entire group, including the youngest one's girlfriend at the time, on vacation. We have done WDW 4 times, Hawaii, Cancun and we did a Disney Cruise last time.

It's gotten increasingly difficult to schedule all of us to go anywhere at the same time, especially since we now have a grandson, so we are changing the tradition to taking just one son/spouse somewhere each year rather than taking the entire group every other year.

 

[quasar4legs]

Our 19 year old son is a full time student and we invite him every year to come with us on vacation and pay all costs.
It is nice 'family time' for us all and at this stage our son still seems quite happy to be with us for 3 weeks of the year. We get him his own room so we all have privacy and I would imagine we will continue to do this for a few more years until he is working full-time.
Hubby and I also try to plan a week away with just the two of us at another time of the year.

 

[DVCLiz]

In the future, if I plan a family vacation and invite either of my daughters and their families, I would expect to pay for all expenses.

They are 21 and 16 at present but I would anticipate many family WDW/Hilton Head vacations with DVC, so I would pay for our DVC membership which would allow them to have free trips to those locations. They will be living within driving distance of both SC and FL for the forseeable future, so travel expenses would be minimal. I would pay for groceries/restaurant meals for everyone. Any shopping they might want to do would be on their own but I reserve the right to totally spoil my future grandchildren at Disney World!

I would pay for theme park tickets or tickets to special events we might plan to attend as a family.

I expect I will also try and do what Pakey does occasionally with the whole family or one family at a time. Anything they are willing to let me do with them, I would pay for. For their own family vacations, they would do that on their own and I would not be included.

 

[WhateverLolaWants]

If it is a family vacation with all four of us, my parents pay for the majority and my sister and I chip in some money. It's never anything like "okay, you're responsible for paying for your flight and half of your hotel room." We just give money and my parents apply it to whatever they want. If it's just a trip with a pair of us, like myself and my mom, then I pay about half. We are always responsible for our own souvenirs. It should be noted that we since we've gotten older (25 and 29), family vacations with all four of us don't really happen too often.

 

[sjs314]

In 2008 we took my DS and his Dgf to vegas and then to DL , we paid everything.
Last year we split the room cost with DS and Ddil we each paid our own air , meals etc
This year we are traveling to WDW with my other DS and Ddil, DS is out of work so they are only paying the extra per nite room charge of $50 but paying for their own air and tix and food.

 

[Planogirl]

My mother wanted nothing to do with WDW but we used to go elsewhere together and we always split the cost. I plan to at least partially pay for DS as long as he's in school.

 

[design_mom]

My parents took my sister and I on family vacations (and paid for everything except souvenirs) until we graduated from college.

We (me, DH, and our two kids) still travel with my parents sometimes, but we pay for our stuff and they pay for theirs. DH and I usually take them out to dinner once during a trip to thank them because they do help out a lot with the kids when they're with us.

We have also traveled with DH's parents and they end up paying for most meals and some activities. I feel sort of weird accepting this (we can definitely afford to pay for ourselves), but once when I protested, my MIL told me that FIL's father used to always pay for the whole family when they went out. She said FIL "wants to do this, so let him." So now I just try to be gracious and accept... And never assume he'll buy.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

My last vacation paid by my mom was spring break of freshman year of college. We went on a family cruise.

Dh's family didn't do traditional vacations. Their first cruise was when 3 of their 4 was out and married. They paid the cruise fare for their 4th (or at least helped fund it---she shared a cabin with them...which makes sense as she was the only one without a room.)

I would expect that we'd cover family vacations while the kids are college students and maybe partially fund until they are married. But that all depends. DH has a wallet that isn't quite coping that we now pay for 5 meals. Once the baby reaches the age where we must pay for her...ouch!

We are spoiled by DVC and mY end up migrating our non Disney vacations to extend stay places for larger rooms and kitchens.

 

[minniecarousel]

Let's see - older DS & DDIL went with us to WDW last Dec. They paid for their airfare, we paid for the room (DVC). They paid for most of their food; DH bought the Tables in Wonderland card & they paid us back after we got home. Younger DS & DDIL will be going with us to WDW in October. Because I'm insisting on non-stops (hopefully, Virgin American will be flying from SF to Orlando by then!) I'll pay for half of their airfare. We could get by cheaper if we do connecting flights, but I'd rather do non-stops.

Our last big vacation where we foot the bill almost 100% was when younger DS turned 21 and older DS graduated from college, we took them to WDW & a Disney Cruise.

Since we've bought DVC, we plan on sharing our points with them for the next 47-50 years!

 

[dissybroad]

I experience great pleasure taking my mom, adult kids, and grandchildren with me and I pay for everything. I'm fortunate enough to be able to do it that way and it's an indulgence for me. I live very simply; high speed internet is probably my biggest splurge so I can be here with you guys on the boards I can afford it and I prepay the trip so I'm not overextended.

 

[Kirby]

Both of my kids are in college and have jobs. We are going to a family reunion in Branson in August and both are going with us. We are providing the transportation, meals during the drive and in the condo and accomodations. Any activity, meal or souvenier expenses they accrue while we are there will be on them.

 

[A_Princess'_Daddy]

My DW and I are 33 and 34, respectively, and long ago made the decision that we would not vacation with either set of parents (well, parent for me, as my mother passed away a few years ago). We visit them, and spend time with them, but outside of milestone trips, we will vacation with our children, the way our parents vacationed with us.

If we were to vacation with DW's parents, I'm quite confident that we'd receive an itemized bill for our share of the toothpaste that we used. They're not cheap, just believe in everybody paying their own share (and we'd gladly pay it).

If we were to vacation with my father, well, we love him dearly, but he's been the Chairman & CEO of a major company for my entire life, and he is used to giving directions and having them followed, so vacations turn into forced marches. He would unquestionably pay for every dime, however, and would thank us for days if we were able to grab one check.

Easier, happier and better for family harmony for all for us to vacation on our own.

 

[kirstenb1]

DH and I bought DVC when we were pretty young, 17 yrs ago. So our parents got free trips out of us for many years!!

DH's parents don't really vacation, so they have never invited us anywhere, which is fine.

My parents paid for a beach rental for all of us over Thanksgiving weekend one time. That was a lot of fun, just the right amount of time.

Because of DVC, we hope to continue to treat our dd's to many wonderful trips as we all get older.

 

[tvguy]

Our two big vacations in the past 3 years have actually been paid for by Grandma (my mom). For ALL of us, and she comes along. A cruise 3 years ago, and Canada this year. She told me she's decided to "start spending my inheritance while she is still here to enjoy it too".
So I'm 53 and she's still paying for MY vacations, hard for me to expect my kids to pay for theirs.

 

[DisneyFirefly]

The only 'vacation' I've taken with my parents recently was to visit my sister in Idaho. I paid for my own flight, and we stayed at my sister's house. We also chipped in for food and helped cook.

My parents and I are thinking about trying to set up a big family trip to Disney in the next couple of years, probably sometime in November. We never went as a family, so my brother and sister have never been. If this actually happens, everyone is going to be paying for their own parts. If they can't afford it, they don't go.

 

[monarchsfan16]

Until my sister and I are out of school, my parents pay our way if we go on vacation with them. We pay for our souvineers, and the random extras.

 

[Teacher03]

Our children are 25, 24, and 20. We still pay for everything when we go on vacation. The last time we took a girls trip to Disney, my older daughter paid for her airline ticket as she lives in DC and we live in Ohio. My daughters know how much I love Disney and have promised they will always take me with them when they have families. I hope so, cuz I'm holding them to it!

I've never been on vacation with my parents. My mom has passed away, and I regret never taking her with us on our many trips. (I didn't want to ask my dad, but that's a whole 'nother story!)

 

[shortbun]

My child is 15 so we're still paying. We'll be paying for a long time. Even my parents who were so tight they squeaked, paid when they invited us on vacation as adults. I always picked a few things to pay for on my own and we always took them out to dinner a couple of times but otherwise, they were the hosts so they paid.

 

[NMAmy]

DD is 19, in college, and I wouldn't dream of making her pay to go on vacation with us. I'm just thrilled that she still wants to come along. We'll probably keep paying as long as she still wants to go with us. We plan our trips around her school breaks.