Another Escape Question

[Knelson85]

Hello everyone,

My fiance and I have decided on an Escape wedding...we even have an ideal date, and place. However, tonight we were going over our guest list, and realized we have 25 people!!! (Somehow we thought we only had 18). We absolutely cannot afford a wishes wedding, as we are already having a reception back home which will cost a lot.

Anyways, I was wondering if this has happened to anyone else...and if so, how did you get around it? If this has not happened to anyone else, I will take any suggestions you may have!

Thanks a lot!

 

[CharacterFan]

You could invite some people for the dinner or dessert party. Maybe think about how many of those 25 wouldn't be able to make it, or are you allowing everyone to have a guest? That might get the numbers down a bit as well.

 

[dakcp2001]

I think everyone has this same dilemma. Are there any children on the guest list? Could you have somone come along to babysit them during the ceremony and just bring them along to the reception? That way they could still be included but not be in the 18 limit. Do you have 25 including you and your fiance? The restriction is for the CEREMONY part only, so you can have more guests at the after party.

Otherwise you as (as I am) out of luck! Cut the guest list or hope not all will be able to make it. I imagine you wont get a 100% yes repsonse unless maybe you live in Florida?

From what I have seen (please correct me if I am wrong) they just do not make exceptions for this. I wish they did, we are JUST over the limit as well. UGH. Its very frustrating! We are thinking of just inviting our parents.

please let me know if you think of something creative or a loophole!

 

[LovelyPrincess432]

We had this problem too, which is one of the reasons we're now going with an at home ceremony and reception, and then a Disneymoon. You have to have you and your guests fit within the 20 person limit. Like the others have said, you can invite more people to attend whatever after event you host.

Are any of your guests 2 or under? I know we talked to a coordinator on the phone who said that they would not be counted as part of our guest list. Although, I've also read on here that some planners will not allow you to do this.

I hope you can find a solution! Good luck! Sorry I'm not more help

 

[Knelson85]

Hi, thanks everyone,


We have 24 people, not including us, and not including our 2 guests that will be 2 and under.

One thing we were thinking, which I saw was mention on here, was not inviting our friends "guests" to the ceremony. That would eliminate possibly 6 people. If we have a group that are not going to be able to attend the ceremony, we were thinking of trying to set something up for them near where we will be (at SBP), but we just don't know what. Any suggestions?

 

[Disneychix]

I was in this same dilemma back in 2005 when they allowed only 15 people. We went with a Swan wedding instead of Disney as they don't have a limit on the amount of guests.

Good luck with your planning!

 

[disprincessatheart]

Hi, thanks everyone,


We have 24 people, not including us, and not including our 2 guests that will be 2 and under.

One thing we were thinking, which I saw was mention on here, was not inviting our friends "guests" to the ceremony. That would eliminate possibly 6 people. If we have a group that are not going to be able to attend the ceremony, we were thinking of trying to set something up for them near where we will be (at SBP), but we just don't know what. Any suggestions?

So by Disney's count you have 28 - even the 2 and under count for an Escape. If we had more info about what you are already planning for the day we might be able to better help with suggestions for what to do with the extra 8 people without more detail.

 

[irisbud]

I would not invite the children under two and would tell your firends that they will be unable to bring a guest. Explain to them that you cannot afford a 5000+ jump in price for their guests to attend the wedding itself. I know it is difficult but if they are your friends they will understand and you will be within the limit.

We invited 25 people (I know, rude) but knew not all would likely make it. We ended up with only 6 guests thanks to the bad economy and health reasons.

I agree with others, you will likely not get a 100% response as it is a destination wedding and the economy is poor right now.

 

[Angela0917]

I don't have a solution, but just giving my 2 cents... I'm not sure where you live or where your guest will be traveling from, but I know I personally would not travel to a wedding if I were not allowed to be at the ceremony, and I think that most people would agree. However, that may be a blessing in disguise. I'd just be upfront with your guests and tell them the situation, and then those who wait till the last minute to tell you they can't come won't feel bad about saying they're not coming, and also those who are on the fence as to whether they will go or not due to financial reasons or other reasons won't feel bad if they can't make it.

 

[Knelson85]

So by Disney's count you have 28 - even the 2 and under count for an Escape. If we had more info about what you are already planning for the day we might be able to better help with suggestions for what to do with the extra 8 people without more detail.

I talked to a wedding planner, and she assured me that anyone under the age of 2 will not count towards the 18.

Everyone who we have invited wants to come. This would be my parents, three of my friends (and their dates), my fiances parents (who are divorced, so will bring their dates), his brother and SIL and their baby, his other brother and date, plus four friends, their dates, and one baby.

We cannot ask people not to travel with guests, as the plan is to make this their own vacation, but have 1.5 days with us. Since everyone is coming from the Toronto area, it is a pretty far trip, so we want to make it worth their while.

We are getting married at SBP, at hopefully 2:30pm early May 2010. My thought was that maybe we could ask some of our guests guests, that we may not know as well, to only come to our reception dinner afterward (which will prob be at Ohana).

There may be one person back out, as he will be working overseas at the time. Other than that, it sounds like everyone else is comming.

I just really wish that there was an exception to this rule. Since we are both grad students (although I will be finishing up at that time) we are pretty limited in our spending, and therefore, cannot afford that wishes. Plus, the point of the escape was the fact that there is not much planning involved, as we will not have time to do a lot of planning while we are in school.

Any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated...thanks for all the advice so far!

 

[irisbud]

I talked to a wedding planner, and she assured me that anyone under the age of 2 will not count towards the 18.

Everyone who we have invited wants to come. This would be my parents, three of my friends (and their dates), my fiances parents (who are divorced, so will bring their dates), his brother and SIL and their baby, his other brother and date, plus four friends, their dates, and one baby.

We cannot ask people not to travel with guests, as the plan is to make this their own vacation, but have 1.5 days with us. Since everyone is coming from the Toronto area, it is a pretty far trip, so we want to make it worth their while.

We are getting married at SBP, at hopefully 2:30pm early May 2010. My thought was that maybe we could ask some of our guests guests, that we may not know as well, to only come to our reception dinner afterward (which will prob be at Ohana).

There may be one person back out, as he will be working overseas at the time. Other than that, it sounds like everyone else is comming.

I just really wish that there was an exception to this rule. Since we are both grad students (although I will be finishing up at that time) we are pretty limited in our spending, and therefore, cannot afford that wishes. Plus, the point of the escape was the fact that there is not much planning involved, as we will not have time to do a lot of planning while we are in school.

Any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated...thanks for all the advice so far!

I hope they will do an exception for you, but I would get it in writing as the contract they send you is boilerplate and I believe explicetly spells out a maximum of 18 guests (with no age limits as to what constitutes a "guest").

Straight from the Letter of agreement: " A maximum of twenty (20) guests including the Bride and the Groom may attend the Wedding. If more than twenty (20) guests attend the Wedding, Disney may (in its sole discretion) immediately cancel the Wedding and you shall be responsible for paying to Disney all applicable cancellation fees."

If you choose to not allow guests of friends to attend the ceremony itself, that is the only thing they will miss out on (same as if you choose not to allow children). They can attend any of your other activities, it is just the ceremony and cake cutting. You can even have your cake elsewhere if you choose (do a lunch and have them serve the cake, though there is generally a charge for this). There is most definitely enough cake for everyone. and that way they will only miss out on the ceremony.

As I stated previously, we though we might run into a similar problem when we first sent out our invitations. At that time, we made it very clear that guests of our guests and children would be the first cut if we had to start eliminating people. We told everyone about the strict limits imposed by Disney and why we must follow them and they were all understanding.

Good luck with whatever you choose. I would not expect Disney to be at all flexible on this matter though.

 

[one sweet world]

other than the rain, because you will be moved inside, whats to stop them from "watching" like other people can from the walkway?
what if you gave them a massage appt. or room service during the time of the ceremony? i have no idea what this would cost. but my dd was considering this for the brother's girlfriend.

 

[PrincessShea]

Invite your family to the ceremony and everyone to dinner/dessert party. Or as someone else already suggested, go to the Swan. They are not going to make an exception for you.

 

[MegKate]

I don't have a solution, but just giving my 2 cents... I'm not sure where you live or where your guest will be traveling from, but I know I personally would not travel to a wedding if I were not allowed to be at the ceremony, and I think that most people would agree.

Oddly enough this happened to me. I was invited to a wedding downstate in Bangor, but only to the reception. I wish I had kept the invitation because it was a lesson in what NOT to say. The gist of it was that we were not allowed at the ceremony, and if we were to go to the location, we wouldn't be allowed in. However we were more than welcome to skip going to the reception and send a gift.

Needless to say, I did none of the above.

And on the escape, I was going to do Escape, but I had more than 18 guests, and that was including infants. I was told in no uncertain terms that the infants counted. And I think that's been the experience of most brides on the board. If they say you can bring them, I would have it written in stone. That's JMHO though...

 

[Knelson85]

Maybe this kind of thing is more common in Canada...as I have been to many wedding receptions, but was not invited the ceremony

Anyways, to be honest, I would rather have some of my friends there, than many of the actual family members. If we had a choice, we probably wouldn't even invite certain family (please don't judge), and I consider my friends to be family anyways. Plus, we already have a wedding party, consisting of our best friends, so they will have to come.

I think we are just going to go ahead will the full list for now, and see if everyone does end up coming. By that time, we may have enough for a wishes wedding anyway, and than we can invite more people, or else we will plan something that suits everyone (maybe send them on a boat cruise for the time being). Most people in our group are pretty laid back, especially our friends, so I do not think they would take it too personally, and understand, if not everyone cant attend this cermony.

AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry, just needed to vent! Thanks for all the advice everyone, I really appreciate it!

 

[dakcp2001]

Anyways, to be honest, I would rather have some of my friends there, than many of the actual family members. If we had a choice, we probably wouldn't even invite certain family (please don't judge), and I consider my friends to be family anyways. !

We feel the same way! We have to invite the fam, but there are some we'd much rather replace with friends.

 

[Lindsay22]

I don't know if this helps you....
We invited 176 people to my wishes wedding. We have 96 people coming to the wedding.
The economy really put a wrench in our wedding plans.