And yet another: Why can't people watch their kids, thread?

[ROEDISNEY]

I hate that. We always figured we have 5 boys all close in age so we taught them from young they need to behave themselves. And they always did. We always had people and CM'S come up to us an say nice things about them. I don't get people why they don't correct there kids when they are young.
But when they get older and do something wrong the parents are going to wonder why. DAHHHHHH! It starts from young you need to correct them.

 

[AbbyPan]

)

See unfortunately when you're a parent you make difficult choices, some times you don't get to "partake" in the magic if little johnny is acting like stitch on a bad day. Some times you do blow a little money, yes I know wdw is crazy expensive but whether or not it's dirt cheap or not children must be controlled.

I'm the opposite, usually I let a lot more slide because it is disney. If I have to speak to a kid and a parent usually it's because they are truly beastly.

That is so true. This is why I think twice about having children. I love them, but I know life will never be the same, it involves many sacrifices (i.e. not enjoying Chef Mickey's the way you'd like to) and responsibilities.

In a sense, trips to Disney are like a contraceptive...lol

 

[blondemom]

I've done the bathroom time out, too. My son (who was just 3 at the time) had a partial meltdown in Biergarten's. I scooped him up and we sat in the bathroom for about 10 minutes washing hands and making bubbles in the sink. He was way to overstimulated. Yeah, that was our fault for not seeing it sooner. But, once I took him away for some private time, we were able to go back, finish our meal, and move on. He wasn't running around the place - he was just not too happy and ready to pitch a fit.

We take our kids out to dinner or lunch at least once every other week, so they are used to having to sit quietly for about an hour. I bring crayons and paper to draw. Sometimes I let them play their DS's (with the volume down).

Some kids just have more energy than others. I've seen kids running wild through restaurants all around WDW. Unless they are hurting me in some way, I leave it up to their parents or the staff to bring them back.

We actually enjoy eating at Whispering Canyon at the Wilderness Lodge because when the kids are finished eating, they can go play with the Lincoln Logs while me and my husband finish up.

 

[disneygal2007]

10 years old, doing this, OMG!!! With her language, wonder where she learned that behavior.

My DS is that age if he behaved that way to anyone I would tan his behind and yea I do mean it.

I know right. My son was about 3 years old and At the time I would very often say D it lol Well he was trying to tie his shoes and every time they wouldn't connect he would say that LOL funny now. But just to say I don't cuss around the kids anymore.
That little girl was so nasty for such a beautiful young lady.

 

[wonderlanne]

Why did I know I would get a response like this from someone.

Your response just makes me shake my head. I'm not complaining to you. I'm venting about parents who are too wrapped up in their own self to care how their kids are disrupting other people who paid to eat without their little brats disrupting my dinner.

And yes, I do have a 9 yo and a 5 yo who has never in all the years we've gone to WDW (and its been since both were babies) and have ever got up and ran around a restaurant and disrupted other patrons while I sat and held a conversation with my table mates. My 5 yo even told the 7 yo girl at the next table after the "Pluto incident", "You shouldn't do that to Pluto"

I could see if the parents gave a crap and at least tried even once to say something to their "little darlings" . But when the hostess came over after the "Pluto incident" and I said something twice and they still did nothing to control the kids behavior, to me it means the parents are oblivious and don't give a rats butt what their kids do as long as they aren't bothering them.

I paid to be at Chef Mickeys too and had my ADR's for 6 months also and if a kid is going to disrupt my family's dinner and the parents aren't going to say anything , you better believe I will. Go ahead and be livid. If the parents would have stepped up and said something , then complete strangers wouldn't have to.

you're the kewlest, absolutely. thank you for speaking up at the restaurant and to all the excuse-makers here.

 

[PaulaSB12]

Well, it sounds to me like you are complaining to the wrong people. You scolded the child, you complained to us, but did you say anything to the parents? If it bothered you as much as you say it did, I would have thought that is who you would have spoken to. If some stranger had told my child off in a restaurant (granted we actually work hard to keep our children from bothering others while diners enjoy a nice meal out), I would be livid! It's obvious you do not have children in this age range any longer, and perhaps are more sensitive to children being rambunctious. My aunt who has no children actually behaves in this same manner, and I refuse to go anywhere with her because her rudeness embaress' me. The children probably spent all day in the parks, and were overtired. That's how children act when they are overtired. The parents were hoping to actually partake in some Disney dining since they spent so much money to come to Disney, but the kids were obviously not up to it. The parents should have definitely paid much more attention the the kids, or more precisely should have not gone to Chef Mickey's that night, but they probably had ADR's for 6 months. ITS DISNEYWORLD, it happens ALL THE TIME.

This is what I find irritating the excuses, what to some people is "rambunctious" is to others just "obnoxious brat syndrome" the parents didn't mind that their little darling was disturbing people because its DISNEYWORLD and there you can relax and let the children be obnoxious because they are over tired and everyone can just put up with it. The op was correct to speak to the child and if you don't want people to tell your child off then you make them behave.

 

[disnut8]

The boy started running back and forth on the ledge next to the wall. Well we had things sitting on it, like the kids stuffed animals , my back pack and the video recorder. The boy stopped before he got to our table twice, then the third time around came full speed from one end of the restaurant and went to step right on our stuff. I put my hand out and said, "You will not run over here. You need to get back to your own table." He looked at me but stopped and went to his table. Again the adults never lifted their head or stopped their conversation.

That lasted about 5 minutes and the boy started to do it again, this time as they were finally gathering up to leave. As the boy came to our table again. I put my hand up and said, "I told you once, do not run over here." He stopped, the dad (or man, whoever the heck he was) obviously heard me. He never looked my way, ackowledged the kid nothing.

Going way back to the original post, this is really what I could see as being the arguing point for most of these posts. That the OP said something to the boy about potentially running onto items that were not his. I bolded the items that were on the ledge and could have been run over.

I don't see how the OP could have done anything but what she did. If she hadn't spoken directly to the boy, her possessions, including a video recorder, could have been damaged immediately. Taking the time to talk to the parents was impossible to prevent the possible immediate harm to her items.

Yes, it's Disney Word; yes, kids and adults get tired; yes, it's Chef Mickey's where the atmosphere is a bit jovial. But I cannot imagine anyone on this board just sitting there and watching a boy running straight for your valuables and not doing anything about it.

Take yourself out of Chef Mickey's, out of Disney World. Put yourself in the same situation anywhere else and think about what you would have done.

 

[scrapbookworm]

Something that I've observed about misbehaving children is that many times, someone like the OP (a complete stranger) gently reprimanding the behavior can make a bigger impact than the parents. Because those kids know that the parents aren't going to make them behave, and those kids don't take it seriously when the parents half-heartedly attempt discipline.

At CVS last week, I was looking at vitamins, and there was a little drink cooler beside it. Probably 20 feet from the pharmacy checkout. A little boy, about 3, opens the cooler and yells "Look Daddy!". Dad, standing at the checkout, just tells him to stop. Boy slams the door, and giggles. Opens the door again, and slams it. A little girl joins in the fun of slamming the cooler door. Lather, rinse, and repeat. Dad just keeps saying "stop it son", but he's a good 20 feet away. He never comes over to physically stop the children. Not sure if the girl was his child too. Anyway, I was talking on the phone to my DH, and apparently my cell phone was picking up the slamming door noises really good. DH said "OMG, what on earth is all that racket?" I started to be passive aggressive and loudly say "Oh, that noise is just 2 kids slamming a cooler door over and over". But, I didn't. I had found the vitamins I wanted, so I walked off.

 

[redzinner]

I remember this one time I was dining at Pikabu in the Dolphin Restaurant, just my husband and myself. This is sort of a reverse thing. I saw the family bring their food.. they all sat down, they turned on this dvd player and plunked it down in front of their child.....no interaction with him while he ate, he watched movies and they talked amongst themselves..no one talked to the little boy. He ate and watched a movie....I have to say that bothered me a bit. How will they learn proper behavior if there is no healthy discussion at the table, plunking him down in front of this screen to keep him entertained so they could dine. I am just wondering is that what parents do now for peace and quiet when they dine as we never had those types of things when my children were little and I am trying to understand...

My comments above are inquiring... not to start an argument.. I am still truly wondering??

The child could have been autistic. I have seen this scenario before at Disney also. The DVD allows the autistic child to be somewhat relaxed in unfamiliar surroundings and gives the parents a chance to dine out.

 

[Mackey Mouse]

That is a very good point, I never thought of that. Autism is one that you cannot necessarily see and parents do need some time to talk and enjoy their meals and if the DVD player helps in that manner, then I say I am all for it..

Thanks for the reminder that there could have been another reason for the DVC player..

 

[Clotho]

Well, yes...he could have been autistic. Seems that one comes up a lot, somehow implying that we should just assume that the child has some unseen disability and the parents are doing all they possibly can to do the right thing by their child.

But we know that is simply not true 99% of the time. And so we have automatic reactions to this perceived behavior.

I, too, am not a fan of plopping a kid in front of a video or a game every time they go out with the adults. This is where I learned my social skills--how I learned politeness, what it meant to converse as adults, what it meant to be out in the world and how to adjust my behavior based on the environment I was in. Sadly, this techno-parenting is getting more rampant. Believe me! I can see the strong pull of allowing an electronic anything give me a few moment's peace! But this is also why I have chosen not to be a parent (yet, at least)--because I know what a huge burden it can be at times, and that my responsibilities can not be shrugged off whenever I need a break, no matter how legitimately and desperately I need it. If and when I have a kid, I will use technology sparingly as a "babysitting" tool--even though it will be frequently and readily at hand!--because I feel my responsibility goes so far as to have to make those hard sacrifices to my time, energy, and sanity. And I am not ready to make those sacrifices, and may never be.

I remember once at a Mexican restaurant, there was a group of about 10 people, nearly half kids. Each kid had their OWN VIDEO PLAYER, and were all watching separate videos while the parents went on with their meal. I found this disappointing in the extreme--there were even other little kids right there for them to interact with, even if they were bored by adult conversation. Or there was crayons and menus to color--a creative endeavor to keep the little ones engaged. But nope. Just videos for all. Sad!

As for the original poster, it seems to be she was perfectly appropriate in her actions. I think the second time I might have politely gone to the parents and asked them tactfully if they wouldn't mind asking their child to not run where he was running. I wouldn't offer anything like "He shouldn't be up there you know!" Just a "Hey, we have some expensive stuff sitting up here. Would you mind asking your son to not run up there?" Believe me, they will get the subtext, even if they don't do anything about it...

 

[bytheblood]

I am glad you stood up for yourself (your stuff). I would have as well.
I would have called a manager over after the 2nd time it happened.

It is sad, because these parents that allow their children to behave like this and never even look at them are the ones that act shocked when their child is hurt or worse....missing.

 

[wonderlanne]

The child could have been autistic. QUOTE]

beg pardon? was this about the child with the dvd player or the badly behaved child? i'm confused.

 

[chocovrdmicears]

But we know that is simply not true 99% of the time. And so we have automatic reactions to this perceived behavior.

Actually 99% of the time people assume my child is guilty of 'bad behavior' or 99% of the time people assume I am a bad parent...when the reality is my child does have autism. 99% of the time that is the automatic reaction to this perceived behavior.

 

[donaldsgal]

...I remember this one time I was dining at Pikabu in the Dolphin Restaurant, just my husband and myself. This is sort of a reverse thing. I saw the family bring their food.. they all sat down, they turned on this dvd player and plunked it down in front of their child.....no interaction with him while he ate, he watched movies and they talked amongst themselves..no one talked to the little boy. He ate and watched a movie....I have to say that bothered me a bit. How will they learn proper behavior if there is no healthy discussion at the table, plunking him down in front of this screen to keep him entertained so they could dine. I am just wondering is that what parents do now for peace and quiet when they dine as we never had those types of things when my children were little and I am trying to understand...

My comments above are inquiring... not to start an argument.. I am still truly wondering??

...I, too, am not a fan of plopping a kid in front of a video or a game every time they go out with the adults. This is where I learned my social skills--how I learned politeness, what it meant to converse as adults, what it meant to be out in the world and how to adjust my behavior based on the environment I was in. Sadly, this techno-parenting is getting more rampant. Believe me! I can see the strong pull of allowing an electronic anything give me a few moment's peace! But this is also why I have chosen not to be a parent (yet, at least)--because I know what a huge burden it can be at times, and that my responsibilities can not be shrugged off whenever I need a break, no matter how legitimately and desperately I need it. If and when I have a kid, I will use technology sparingly as a "babysitting" tool--even though it will be frequently and readily at hand!--because I feel my responsibility goes so far as to have to make those hard sacrifices to my time, energy, and sanity. And I am not ready to make those sacrifices, and may never be.

I remember once at a Mexican restaurant, there was a group of about 10 people, nearly half kids. Each kid had their OWN VIDEO PLAYER, and were all watching separate videos while the parents went on with their meal. I found this disappointing in the extreme--there were even other little kids right there for them to interact with, even if they were bored by adult conversation. Or there was crayons and menus to color--a creative endeavor to keep the little ones engaged. But nope. Just videos for all. Sad!

I'm replying because both of you made respectful, inquisitive posts about the use of technology to subdue rowdy children in restaurants. I hope I get the same from anyone who quotes me.

I have an iPhone, and one of the greatest aspects of this little gadget is that I can back-up DVDs that I own onto my phone. This has served to be helpful in managing my niece's behavior in a restaurant. Here's how it plays out: my niece, the angel and delight that she is 99% of the time, is nearly 3 and knows what she wants when she wants it. I am not a parent and enjoy my leisure time, both at Disney (for instance, at Citricos about a month ago) and at regular restaurants. As a non-parent, I really, really don't like when a child screams, runs around, etc. They and their family paid, as did mine, so we all should enjoy the experience as much as possible. When at Disney - as is the case when at a regular Olive Garden in our hometown - if Hannah misbehaves, I "crack down" rather quickly, as does her mom and grandma. She gets a 1, 2, 3 count. She's told what will happen if she doesn't stop (leave and go to time out), and reminded again between 2 and 3 as a last warning. If she continues, she earns 3 and off we go. This includes when she throws a fit out of anger or frustration AND when she is giddy and silly and obstinently won't obey. We pull out the iPhone in a couple of settings.

1) She is being okay but is getting ancy, tired, etc. Her behavior doesn't warrant removal, but it MIGHT get there at some point, so this is a diversion for a while. This is also when there's no food in front of her. When the food is there, the iPhone is away - this is because it's expensive AND we talk over our food.

2) It's a reward I offer her out of kindness for good behavior. Again, this is time-limited and she is included in our conversation.

I just wanted to throw my two cents in on this issue. I don't see anything wrong with what the OP did. I wanted to shed some light that, in this day and age, it CAN be quite hard to use these things in a way that doesn't let the gadget be the mom/dad/guardian/caregiver. However, we PARENT first and use technology as another tool from the tool box. As I said, we remove, we deny privileges, we allow her to apologize for behavior and restart, we distract, we explain, we dole out consequences, we talk sternly, we use the iPhone, we hold her accountable for choices because, at almost 3, we are playing a HUGE role in who she becomes, how she interacts with others, and how she views her behavior in relation to the rest of the world. We don't want my niece to grow up to be a people-pleaser or to step on toes, but we want her to be respectful, mindful of others, accept that she makes mistakes and be accountable for correcting those, and show kindness to others. We use whatever tools we have to help her accomplish this, in lines at Disney, in restaurants at Disney, in the car en route to Disney, etc.

Sorry for taking this OT a bit - was genuinely wanting to respond to some questions posed in this thread. Again, I see no problem with what the OP did.

 

[squirrelgirl]

Actually 99% of the time people assume my child is guilty of 'bad behavior' or 99% of the time people assume I am a bad parent...when the reality is my child does have autism. 99% of the time that is the automatic reaction to this perceived behavior.

Thank you for your post. You have stated, quite simply, what I also know only to well as a Mom of a child with autism. I hurts to see the judgement in other's eyes. My son is now 8 years old. I wish I could say that I have developed a thicker skin, but like everything else, it is a work in progress.

Thank you to those of you who look upon us, or any familiy with special needs, as perfectly imperfect because we are just like you. I like to joke that the volume is turned up to 10...everything, just much more extreme. And for those that judge (and I am not saying that anyone here is doing that), trust me...everytime they say 'thank goodness that isn't my kid', I think, yes, thank goodness you are not the parent...because you would not understand. I am blessed to be his parent and to love him. We appreciate everything so much more in ways you would never begin to imagine!

 

[Clotho]

everytime they say 'thank goodness that isn't my kid', I think, yes, thank goodness you are not the parent...because you would not understand. I am blessed to be his parent and to love him. We appreciate everything so much more in ways you would never begin to imagine!

Actually, if that person WERE the parent of that child, they WOULD understand. Remember that you have a unique perspective as the parent that casual observers don't have. And if they went through the same things you did, they would understand and love their child just as you do. It's all a matter of perspective...

 

[bytheblood]

Autism or not, it does not excuse the parent for not looking towards their children, not looking after their children and not keeping them off and away from other people's tables who are actaully trying to enjoy some time with their family.

 

[Tricia1972]

This has veered from the original restaurant topic.