And it begins - planners traveling with non planners

[momtotwolittleones]

My MIL is taking our whole family to DL the first week of August - my, my dh, my SIL, her dh, her dd, and my MIL and FIL. Dh and I are planners. Not rigid, but I like to get tickets to whatever I can and make reservations so we have options. My SIL is the exact opposite. She shows up an hour late to everything, never makes reservations, etc.

So, a month ago I talked to her about the WOC picnics. Told her I wanted to order some so we didn't have to deal with getting FP to the show. She said great, send her the link. I did. Didn't hear back. Sent her the link again. Get an email from her that she can't work the link.

I just got online and they are all sold out. I couldn't really buy our picnics and just have tickets for ourselves when we are going to be with 5 other people, and now we can't get them.

I just have a bad feeling about the whole trip going this way. We like to get up early, and have somewhat of a plan so we're not standing in long lines the heat. (In fact, we always go offseason - she won't pull her dd out of school, so we had to go during the summer this time.)

Anyhow, just a vent, and a frustration. We are staying at the DLH so hopefully we'll have a chance of getting FP first thing in the morning.

 

[CrazyDuck]

Haha... Been there! I took my mom and the inlaws on the our last trip.... We got to the park early to use our MM then once in the park we spent most of the time eating at carnation cafe ... If we are in the park early it's for a reason... Peter Pan, Dumbo, Nemo, Alice... It is not for pancakes and bacon!

 

[Eeee-va]

Any chance you can do the second show and get a picnic for that? Staying at the Disneyland hotel I think you'll be just fine for FPs too (if you can get the rest of your party up! ) and that will save a decent amount of money over the picnics.

I find when going with people who aren't planners, I need to plan the big things myself (basically ask them repeatedly and generally make the reservations/book the packages/etc. for them, and make sure they get there on time). Other than that, I have to suck it up and try to go with the flow.

If I were you, I'd plan for a couple things (either for all of you or just you and your DH, which might be nice!) and try to go with the flow for the rest of it. You're so close to the park, you can definitely get there early and then meet your family whenever they arrive. Assuming there are some cell phones spread around, with texting it's very easy to meet up whenever. (Hopefully the non-planners won't complain about the lines being long if they show up at noon. )

 

[IBLarsen]

We just went with Brother in Law, SIL, and 2 nieces. (Our family of 4). It worked out well. I am the planner. What I did, was to come up with a plan of what our family wanted to do. I highlighted some of the better rides and shows to do together. Came up with selections of restaurants, then showed it to SIL, to see if they would like to see X show with us on this day...yes or no. Do you want to eat at X restaurant with us? Would you prefer this day or this day? Then I went and made ressies for us.
We had an agreement to try to get there early in the am and tour together, but if they wanted to go off in their own direction then so be it, I wanted them to have fun also. We agreed, no hard feelings if we separated. Once we decided to go our own way for lunch, then texted a while later to see if everyone was ready to meet up. Things like that, and it worked well for us! If we wanted to sit and watch fireworks and they didn't, that's ok, we'll see you later. We tried to have a few things planned together. But honestly it ended up to where we spend most of our time together anyways!

So sorry, long story, but the point is to come up with a plan for you and try to see if others want to coordinate with what you have planned (they may just need a little guidance) If you are afraid of missing out on ressies for something, give them the option and say you are booking it and need to know if you should count them in or not. If you don't hear back, schedule for you.

 

[momtotwolittleones]

Yeah, dh and I just talked, and we decided that we're just going to do our thing and they can join us or not.

We much prefer to get up early and take advantage of MM - my SIL doesn't roll out of the hotel until around 10am. That's fine, but we'll be letting her know that we're getting our WOC FPs first thing and she can join or not.

We're with our two kids as well, and I don't think it's fair to them to completely abandon what we want to do. I adore my SIL, and the pace she moves works great for her, but it doesn't work very well for us!

 

[momtotwolittleones]

We just went with Brother in Law, SIL, and 2 nieces. (Our family of 4). It worked out well. I am the planner. What I did, was to come up with a plan of what our family wanted to do. I highlighted some of the better rides and shows to do together. Came up with selections of restaurants, then showed it to SIL, to see if they would like to see X show with us on this day...yes or no. Do you want to eat at X restaurant with us? Would you prefer this day or this day? Then I went and made ressies for us.
.

I kind of did this. We're having her dd's birthday while we're there, and I was the one who ended up making the dinner reservations. I was calling for other nights (SIL was supposed to take care of that night) and realizing how hard it was to find decent dinner times for a party of 9, I went ahead and booked the restaurant she wanted!

I should have been more forceful about the WOC picnics. But, maybe not spending the money on the picnics will work out for the best, if we can get a FP instead.

 

[bumbershoot]

Be sure to get up early and go through the Grand's DCA entrance, which is for hotel guests. It's right there near the FP machines for WOC.

Of course you can't get them for your family, because they have to enter a park with their tickets, but oh well!

For the times that you are otgether in the parks, I found that it works best if they don't know that you have a plan. So whenever someone pulls out a map and/or says the magic words "whattaya guys wanna do"...that's when you say "oh I have a fabulous idea, let's go to THIS place!" And if you need to grab FPs along the way, grab their tickets so you can do it, and then just rush rush to get back to them so they hardly know you're gone. Doing that sort of thing made my visits with my brother and sis in law MUCH better, and they hardly knew that I was doing it. Way better for me, too, because they made fun of my notebook with plans on it.

 

[lyv4him]

Totally understand. I am in the same boat. I am going with my mum, sis, cuz, nphw, dh, ds, dd. I am the planner and my mum, sis, cuz are not. I'm just going to have to learn to be flexible, it will be really hard not getting annoyed. I rather be a good steward of my time, and plan relaxation times, then just shoot off the cuff and WASTE time. But I guess it is just how you see it too...some people are just happy to be there...and want to enjoy the scenery instead of all the rides.

 

[CStorm]

I'm a planner, always have been, always will be. We did a 10 day tour of Alaska with 7 adults. I came up with an itinerary for DH and myself. Gave it to them about 6 months before we left and asked them if they wanted to join us on anything. They were THRILLED! All of them jumped at the chance to have their vacation planned. We had a marvelous time. Every since then they call me Julie McCoy

 

[SD33]

I feel your pain on this one. The problem is that some people don't really understand what a truly complex and sophisticated machine Disneyland is. They think they can just show up and have a great time. Maybe, but they are likely to stand in 1-2 hour long lines and get beat by the heat or the crowds. Having a good plan strikes these people as confining, when at Disneyland, it actually means freedom. Freedom from long lines, freedom from missed experiences or attractions, and freedom from a crappy viewing spot for WOC

At Disneyland, failing to plan can be planning to fail. Unless you are a park veteran who knows his/her way around and just wants to chill. But that is a whole other story.

 

[3Minnies1Mickey]

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I FEEL YOUR PAIN!!!!

We did a family trip in June (20 of us!!). It could be worse, you could've been there pre-AP blockout days!!! I was the planner.....NO ONE ELSE WAS! I had to plan and book everything. I found a house to rent for us all, booked all our dining reservations, WOC picnic, I even had to go with my FIL to buy passes because he was afraid he'd get the wrong ones! The plan was to get to the parks at opening together, ride a few rides and after a couple of hours split up and each family go their own way until we met back at the house for early dinner.......Not how it worked out and we ended up ALL staying together 24/7. All rides, show, meals, breaks...

I say plan the reservations the rest of you want and include your SIL in the count and if she flakes or doesn't "like it" too bad she doesn't have to join you. As far as WOC, I'd buy the picnic the day of for the later show.

 

[lyv4him]

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I FEEL YOUR PAIN!!!!

We did a family trip in June (20 of us!!). It could be worse, you could've been there pre-AP blockout days!!! I was the planner.....NO ONE ELSE WAS! I had to plan and book everything. I found a house to rent for us all, booked all our dining reservations, WOC picnic, I even had to go with my FIL to buy passes because he was afraid he'd get the wrong ones! The plan was to get to the parks at opening together, ride a few rides and after a couple of hours split up and each family go their own way until we met back at the house for early dinner.......Not how it worked out and we ended up ALL staying together 24/7. All rides, show, meals, breaks...

I say plan the reservations the rest of you want and include your SIL in the count and if she flakes or doesn't "like it" too bad she doesn't have to join you. As far as WOC, I'd buy the picnic the day of for the later show.

WOW! Planning for 20?! You are amazing.

 

[kolohe_lady]

This sounds like my family! My dad and one of my sisters like to have a game plan for just about everything, my mom and I tend to be more go-with-the-flow types. I would say go ahead and plan what you feel should be planned out in advance. Most likely the non-planner-types will follow your lead. If you start getting on each other's nerves, try breaking off into separate groups for a few hours and meeting up later at a certain place and time. Sometimes families need breaks from each other to keep the peace. Just be sure each group has a map and a cell phone or walkie talkie with them in case you need to track each other down for any reason.

 

[BarbieGal457]

Ohhhh have I been there too!! In 2009 the DBF and I went with three other couples (we are all friends). Well, none of them are the planning type, although they do love to be very active on vacation. The first night there, we ended up at EPCOT. That is when they decided, to heck with the rest of the vacation, they were going to spend all 9 days drinking! The DBF and I may have one cocktail if that, and rarely. When they made us almost an hour late for Chef Mickey's with their drinking and gift shopping - when all we had to do was hop a monorail! - and then couldn't get out of bed the next morning, we'd had it. There was no way I was waiting until 3pm each day to go to the parks, for no reason, when I was up at 6:30!

We dealt with this by generally splitting up from them for most of the trip. We met up at meal times and for certain parts of the day, but it was just much less stressful and easier to be able to split up and not have to worry about them being very unruly with us. I know your situation is a family trip, but with so many people going, why don't you each go your own ways for certain times? I love my family and friends, but if I were with them all the time for an entire Disney trip I'd go nuts! Everyone needs a bit of alone time, and maybe if they aren't crazy about seeing WoC, you can plan from now to see it with your own family and make adjustments.

Here's wishing you a great time, regardless!

 

[Funball]

My MIL is taking our whole family to DL the first week of August - my, my dh, my SIL, her dh, her dd, and my MIL and FIL. Dh and I are planners. Not rigid, but I like to get tickets to whatever I can and make reservations so we have options. My SIL is the exact opposite. She shows up an hour late to everything, never makes reservations, etc.

So, a month ago I talked to her about the WOC picnics. Told her I wanted to order some so we didn't have to deal with getting FP to the show. She said great, send her the link. I did. Didn't hear back. Sent her the link again. Get an email from her that she can't work the link.

I just got online and they are all sold out. I couldn't really buy our picnics and just have tickets for ourselves when we are going to be with 5 other people, and now we can't get them.

I just have a bad feeling about the whole trip going this way. We like to get up early, and have somewhat of a plan so we're not standing in long lines the heat. (In fact, we always go offseason - she won't pull her dd out of school, so we had to go during the summer this time.)

Anyhow, just a vent, and a frustration. We are staying at the DLH so hopefully we'll have a chance of getting FP first thing in the morning.

Ooh .. I don’t like going with non-planners either. I feel lost with a plan, I need to have some sort of schedule for my day(specially at Disneyland) so that I don’t feel like I am missing something really important. At least with a plan you got some options and time frames to work with in case you have to change something around…

 

[blackjackdelta]

Ooh .. I don’t like going with non-planners either. I feel lost with a plan, I need to have some sort of schedule for my day(specially at Disneyland) so that I don’t feel like I am missing something really important. At least with a plan you got some options and time frames to work with in case you have to change something around…

Well Sara, at least you are close.

Jack

 

[Funball]

Well Sara, at least you are close.

Jack

What does that mean?

 

[blackjackdelta]

What does that mean?

It means that you are not XXXX miles away from the park so if the experience does not go the way planned you can go back the next day, month, year and do it different where some of can not. I refuse to go with other people outside our little group because I have read many posts where things do not work out well.

Jack

 

[caldad]

Anyhow, just a vent, and a frustration. We are staying at the DLH so hopefully we'll have a chance of getting FP first thing in the morning.

You can use the DCA entry inside the GCH to get the FP's for WOC. The GCH DCA entry opens up at 9AM for all DL hotel guests. Just note that all the tickets need to be "activated". Meaning they have to be used to to enter DL or DCA the day you are trying to get FP's.

Good luck the rest of the trip!

 

[disneykohler]

Wow, that's EERIE, the exact same thing happened to me with a non-planner, wouldn't give me opinion and now the picnics are sold out for the entire week we're there. I feel your pain!! (not that I have anything HELPFUL to add...just that I empathize!)

Lex