Ahhhh!! Christmas!

[Keli]

I originally planned to wear a nice red turtleneck sweater with a Christmas scarf and black slacks. DH would have worn a sports shirt with slacks. Instead, I opted for a dressier blouse and black skirt. DH wore his jacket and tie.
DD made appetizers using the recipe DIL sent her.
DIL had 10 people for a buffet dinner - DH and I, DD and DSIL, her DS and DH, her DM and aunt. She served fish fillets, green beans, two different onion recipes, and saffron rice. DIL did work hard on the dinner and I appreciated her efforts. No matter what, I didn't have to cook!
Her DM and aunt are not overly social so we did work to engage them in general conversation, but they just wanted to talk to each other about past gathering at each other homes and other relatives of theirs. So, we smiled and moved on and spent most of the day chatting and laughing with DD and SIL.
This was so different from our family gatherings where anyone and everyone is welcome. We always try to keep an eye out to see that conversation is flowing and everyone is included in conversation with some group.
A little after dinner (which was served at 6pm instead of 3pm when it was supposed to be), her mother announced she needed to leave, got her coat, and quickly went out the door without saying good-bye to anyone. I saw tears in her eyes, but no one said anything unpleasant. It seemed like it was an emotional reaction to something in her own thoughts. She was gone in less than a minute.
Believe it or not, we did have a good day. We got to spend time with our new granddaughter and enjoyed the time with our DD, DSIL and DS. Our DDIL spent a lot of time cooking and wanted no help, but we also enjoyed the time we had with her. So, all in all, it was an interesting, but good day!

I think you did the right thing in going along with your DDIL's requests. I think the end result of your day shows that. You had a good time. Your dh had a good time. You got to spend time with family.
Had everyone balked at DDIL's requests I am certain there would have been a different result. Sometimes it's just better to go with the flow, even if it's inconvient.

 

[Lionqueen2]

DH and I did enjoy the day. We just stayed pleasant and upbeat. After all, the most important thing to us was that we were spending the day with the people that we love the most. What can be better than that!
DS called this morning and we told him how happy we were to spend the day with him and his family. He was so pleased. We reminded him that it was so sweet of DDIL to host all of us for Christmas dinner and how we appreciated that she would go through so much effort to have us all together.
DDIL's family seems somewhat disfunctional to us. Her mom has been divorced for 7 or 8 years, but has still not accepted it along with DDIL. DDIL is always looking for ways to try and reunite her parents, but that seems quite impossible. Her mother does not seem basically happy and plays a martyr role often while her father is enjoying his freedom with a new younger girlfriend.
We always want to maintain a good loving relationship with our son and we know that doing what we can to keep family gatherings happy is important.

 

[clarabelle]

I think you are very wise lion queen

 

[WebmasterMaryJo]

DH and I did enjoy the day. We just stayed pleasant and upbeat. After all, the most important thing to us was that we were spending the day with the people that we love the most. What can be better than that!

DS called this morning and we told him how happy we were to spend the day with him and his family. He was so pleased. We reminded him that it was so sweet of DDIL to host all of us for Christmas dinner and how we appreciated that she would go through so much effort to have us all together.

You sound so gracious. Hopefully, your daughter-in-law will emulate your actions and someday be the kind of mom-in-law you are to her.

Glad you enjoyed your day with your family.

 

[Aliceacc]

Lion Queen,

You strike me as a kind and loving mom and mother in law. Your son and daughter in law are lucky to have you.

 

[Lionqueen2]

Thank you for the kind comments.
We actually are going to be going through a family affair again in a couple of weeks for our DGD's christening, but DDIL's father will be there, too, which will make things more interesting especially if he shows up with his new girlfriend.
DH and I stay on good terms with each of them, but some circumstances make things tricky.