Age to start preschool

[hulagirl87]

So I'm having some mixed feelings and looking for a little advice. DD will be 3 in February, so 3 1/2 come this fall. Should she go to preschool this year or wait til next fall when she will be 4 1/2? Money is an issue, also, does she need to be in preschool for 2 years before Kindergarten? We do a lot of things together, the museum, dance class, library, the zoo, etc. I do have her signed up for a few classes this spring, an art class and another class, through our local rec. My SIL didn't start her oldest daughter til 4, so only one year of preschool, so I'm just asking if 2 years is "necessary" or would it be bad to not start her this year? I know the interaction would be good, but again, not sure if it's worth the money. Thanks!!

 

[Southernmiss]

None of my 4 went to preschool and have done very well. If you are interacting and helping her learn at home I see no reason for preschool.

 

[akcire]

So I'm having some mixed feelings and looking for a little advice. DD will be 3 in February, so 3 1/2 come this fall. Should she go to preschool this year or wait til next fall when she will be 4 1/2? Money is an issue, also, does she need to be in preschool for 2 years before Kindergarten? We do a lot of things together, the museum, dance class, library, the zoo, etc. I do have her signed up for a few classes this spring, an art class and another class, through our local rec. My SIL didn't start her oldest daughter til 4, so only one year of preschool, so I'm just asking if 2 years is "necessary" or would it be bad to not start her this year? I know the interaction would be good, but again, not sure if it's worth the money. Thanks!!

If you are not ready to send her to preschool yet why not look in your community for a parents day out program. My daughter goes one day a week. It is like a preschool. She has the same 7 other kids in class and two teachers. We pay $21 a week and it is 4 hours. The cost is very low because they are affiliated with a church, we are not members.

My daughter started at around 18 months old. Next year I hope to put her in two days a week. My daughter lives it, and we can still do lots of classes zoo visits etc

I use the time to do any household business that is not toddler friendly saving me the cost if a babysitter.

 

[marcyinPA]

I teach 2 year olds in a traditional play based preschool setting.

If she is asking to go to school, and really enjoying and seeking out being with other children, I would send her at 3. Some children just really want that social interaction and thrive on it.

Otherwise, I would wait until 4- but I WOULD send her. There is an element of preschool that she can't get being with you- and that is learning to deal with other adults, as well as children. Preschool is a great way to foster independence, too- so that when she goes to kindergarten, she will know how to be on her own for a few hours.

Find a good, play-based preschool (no worksheets!!) and watch her thrive!

 

[dyna]

Mine all started at age 3 but they also had a speech impairment an preschool was where they got their therapy. Looking back on it at age I would now only have them going on therapy days. Then at 4 add a day or 2......BTW mine got free preschool because of needing speech therapy that the state paid for (Only free benefit we ever got of any kind)

My youngest ended up going to 2 different preschools at the same time because the state funded on did not teach acedemics but the private preschool did so she went to 1 school on Mon wed an fri an another on tues & thurs.

There is so much expected of the Kindergarteners now it is unreal! My gsons expected to know more for preschool than mine did for K

Can you try to find a preschool near you that will let your child go 2 days a week this year an then next yr 4or 5 days a week?

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

I work with that age group, and I've had a kid in that age group. Here's my opinions.

Preschool at 2: 2 year olds do not need preschool, there's nothing a good preschool provides that you can't also provide at home or in a good home daycare situation. Having said that many 2 year olds enjoy preschool, I know my kid did, and if you're looking for a way to get some childfree hours, or to spend time with siblings (maybe volunteer at their school, or be with a baby), or to work, it can be a nice way to meet that goal. In addition, since most preschools include some physical activity it can be a nice way to have your 2 year burn off some steam, especially in the winter.

Preschool at 3: By 3 most kids are ready for regular social time with peers, and for more stimulation. Preschool is a great way to provide this, but it's not the only way. I think that if a parent doesn't send their kid to preschool it's beneficial to think about other ways to make sure they get certain experiences: time with other kids (this can be siblings, or a neighborhood playground, or a church group), a chance to listen to and learn from adults who aren't mom or dad (Sunday school, art class, drop off playdates with a neighbor), a chance to explore with new materials, and lots of outdoor play.

Preschool at 4: While I don't think that preschool is mandatory at 4, in my experience it's a good idea. Kids who are used to the routines of school, who have experience with separation from parents, and who have sustained experiences with a consistent peer group are more likely to have a smooth transition to Kindergarten.

 

[StitchesGr8Fan]

I can understand the money issue. But if you don't want to send her because YOU aren't ready, then I urge you to think about what is best for her. If she wants to go, seems mature enough, and you can find the money, then send her. It will help make the transition to kindergarten easier.

Maybe a teacher can confirm this - I'm being told by other moms that preschool is the new kindergarten, and kindergarten is like first grade was when we went to school. Kids are learning the basics in preschool, so if they don't go they are behind starting kindergarten where they are expected to hit the ground running. I'm planning on sending my little one to preschool just for that reason.

 

[Southernmiss]

While I agree that kindergarten is like 1st or 2nd grade were, kids can still be well prepared and ready for k without preschool. Our school district has pamphlets and info for you on what a child needs to be ready for kindergarten. Just ask. My kids are 11 to 18.

 

[ronandannette]

4 1/2 for pre-school; 5 1/2 for kindergarten. Entering school as one of the oldest children as opposed to being one of the youngest is a big advantage. Please don't think of it as her "getting behind". Kids make huge developmental gains between ages 3 & 4; there's plenty of important things she can learn by being home with you during that time.

 

[hulagirl87]

these posts have been extremely helpful. thank you so much!

 

[Zandy595]

DS went to preschool for one year before kindergarten. It was more for the social interaction with other kids his age though and to learn how to act in a school setting.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

My kids all went to a very part-time preschool for 2-3 year before beginning kindergarten. It worked for us--I liked having a little free time (and I do mean a little....was only 2 1/2 hours 2-3 days a week) and my kids enjoyed going. I think a well-run program is great, even if it's for only 1 year before kindergarten.

Having said that, last year I worked as an assistant in a local preschool and it was not a quality program. The head teacher was a nasty woman and was not good with the children. I stayed with the program for that year because I did not want to leave the kids high and dry with her, but think it's unfortunate that some people work with children who really have no business working with them. This particular teacher has been there for over 30 years and is an institution, so there's no way that she will lose her job, even though many people have pulled their kids from the program and even some who stayed there were unhappy. No program is way better than a bad program.

Bottom-line...make sure you find a quality program. It doesn't have to be expensive--the school my 3 boys went to was not expensive and was very good. Spend time observing the class and talk with the other parents.

 

[marcyinPA]

I just wanted to add another thought that I had- and that is that I am finding that many parents are not providing sensory experiences for their children at home, because they are too messy, or they require too much supervision.

I can't begin to tell you how many of my two year olds have never held a crayon, a marker, or a paintbrush. Many of them had never touched playdough (which I made from scratch- and add scents, glitter, and sometimes I even make chocolate playdough!)

We provide a sensory activity every single day in our preschool- from finger painting, and hammering into objects, to a sensory table that is open every day. (inside the table, they will find sand, water, pasta, rice, epsom salts, flour mixed with baby oil (snow dough), ice, etc., with a variety of cups, scoops, spoons, funnels, droppers, etc.).

Sensory experiences are the building blocks to pre-writing and writing. Children need to do these types of things before they can hold a pencil. Important stuff- disguised as fun, messy play!

 

[MinnieFan4ever]

I started my daughter this year in preschool. She was a little over 3 when the classes started. It is a 2 day program and she attends for 3 1/2 hours. She does each lunch there and then "recess" on the playground for 30 minutres before I pick her up.

We sent her because she is an only child. She really needed to interact more with children her own age. Our pre-k is thru church and there are 12 kids and 2 teachers per class. They follow a schedule each day. She LOVES it. At first she was a bit scared to be there "alone". Now she wakes up in the morning asking if it is a school day and wants to go.

Prior to school all the classes she took were Mommy and Me type classes. She would only interact with other kiddo's if I did. Now she will play with other kids and actually enjoy it. She has grown so much these past few months, it's been wonderful.

 

[badblackpug]

4 1/2 for pre-school; 5 1/2 for kindergarten. Entering school as one of the oldest children as opposed to being one of the youngest is a big advantage. Please don't think of it as her "getting behind". Kids make huge developmental gains between ages 3 & 4; there's plenty of important things she can learn by being home with you during that time.

I disagree with this. I know "red-shirting" is the new trend, but I think it depends on the child. I don't think a child should be held back strictly based on age. I think determining whether they are ready, regardless of being a little older, or a little younger, should be the deciding factor.

My 2 older kids are on opposite ends of this. My daughter has a late August birthday. She is one of the youngest in her class. She does fine. My older son has a November birthday, he is one of the oldest in his class, he does very well, and probably could have started early.

My 2 younger kids, my daughter has a February birthday, like the OP's daughter. She started preschool at 3 1/2. She has been fine in school. She loves school and loves the socialization. She will be a kindergartner this September at 5 1/2. Her preschool teachers all agree she is ready academically and socially.

My son has an early November birthday. He started preschool this year at 2 months shy of 3. Since he was potty trained, they agreed to take him. His teachers say he is ding well both academically and socially. He will probably be one of the older kids in his class in kindergarten due to cut off dates.

OP, I would say, if money is an issue, maybe you could find a part time program this year if your daughter is really interested in school or needs the socialization. I think preschool is important, though, and kids learn social skills that they won't learn just hanging out with mom.

 

[clm10308]

The only think I can think to add is too make sure that your DD occasionally does things without you there if you choose not to do preschool. A dedicated parent can pretty easily make sure that their child is academically ready for kindergarten, but the transition can be traumatic if mom and child have never been apart.

 

[aprilgail2]

I disagree with this. I know "red-shirting" is the new trend, but I think it depends on the child. I don't think a child should be held back strictly based on age. I think determining whether they are ready, regardless of being a little older, or a little younger, should be the deciding factor.

My 2 older kids are on opposite ends of this. My daughter has a late August birthday. She is one of the youngest in her class. She does fine. My older son has a November birthday, he is one of the oldest in his class, he does very well, and probably could have started early.

My 2 younger kids, my daughter has a February birthday, like the OP's daughter. She started preschool at 3 1/2. She has been fine in school. She loves school and loves the socialization. She will be a kindergartner this September at 5 1/2. Her preschool teachers all agree she is ready academically and socially.

My son has an early November birthday. He started preschool this year at 2 months shy of 3. Since he was potty trained, they agreed to take him. His teachers say he is ding well both academically and socially. He will probably be one of the older kids in his class in kindergarten due to cut off dates.

OP, I would say, if money is an issue, maybe you could find a part time program this year if your daughter is really interested in school or needs the socialization. I think preschool is important, though, and kids learn social skills that they won't learn just hanging out with mom.

I agree- my daughter would have been bored to tears if I held her back just because she was only 4 when she started kindergarten! She was 4 the first 3 months of kindergarten and is now in 8th grade in the pre-ap courses.
OP I don't think it will really matter if you only want to send your child to one year of pre-school- The kindergarten teachers always say that they can tell right away which children are the ones that never went to preschool but they never say "oh that child only had one year of preschool". My daughter started preschool in 2 year old preschool- she was one year and nine months old. It didn't go very well for her, she was not ready to be left there alone so I took her out and tried again the next year for 3 year old preschool, she was 2 years 9 months old and it went much better for her. She was an only child so I wanted her around kids her own age and learning to follow school rules etc. By the time she went to kindergarten she climbed on that bus the first day and barely waved goodbye, she was off! Of course I walked home from the bus stop crying LOL.

 

[fairestoneofall]

i have three kids (one is still a toddler and not near preschool age yet).

DD did not go to any kind of preschool. she did perfectly fine starting kindergarten without it. she has a December birthday.

DS went to preschool when he was almost four (he has a November birthday). so, he had finished two years of preschool when he started kindergarten. for him, it was important to get that structure and socialization.

i think a lot depends on the child.

 

[JVL1018]

Both my kids(2 years apart) had 2 years of preschool.

Because the cutoff here is 10/1 and they have fall birthdays, they were just about to turn 4 and 5 for their preschool years, and just about to turn 6 for K.
Because they were on the older side, I felt they needed something at that age.
Both kids at 4 went Tues/Thurs 12:30-3:00, my daughter at 5, went M, W, F 12:30-3, and my son at 5 went five days 12:30-3.

Preschool doesn't have to be an every day, all day affair.

A couple days a week, a couple hours a day is a nice easing into it.

I get wanting to spend the time with your kids while you can, I had no desire to send them out every day, but they had such fun, and it was nice having a couple of hours either with just my son while my DD was in school, or ALL ALONE when they both were.

 

[pyrxtc]

So I'm having some mixed feelings and looking for a little advice. DD will be 3 in February, so 3 1/2 come this fall. Should she go to preschool this year or wait til next fall when she will be 4 1/2? Money is an issue, also, does she need to be in preschool for 2 years before Kindergarten? We do a lot of things together, the museum, dance class, library, the zoo, etc. I do have her signed up for a few classes this spring, an art class and another class, through our local rec. My SIL didn't start her oldest daughter til 4, so only one year of preschool, so I'm just asking if 2 years is "necessary" or would it be bad to not start her this year? I know the interaction would be good, but again, not sure if it's worth the money. Thanks!!

I have 4 kids and not one of them went to pre-school. All of them did wonderfully in Kinder and throughout school now they are doing great. My youngest birthday is only 4 days away from the cut-off and I would have fought for him to go to school that year if it was after. He was ready and so was I. I really enjoy having my kids home with me all the time and they didn't do play-dates or anything like that before school started for them. I can't wait to do it all again and will keep our next little one home as long as I can. (hopefully next two....)