Afraid To Fly, Need Tips

[TiggerPiglet]

I haven't flown in five years. We are planning on flying to Las Vegas in two weeks and I'm completely freaking out. You're probably saying, why are you flying then? I'm flying because we're going out to see my FIL who's house we haven't been to in 10 years because of my fear of flying. My DH has been really patient with me and even said that I didn't have to go, he would just go with the kids, but that freaks me out more than me not going, if that makes any kind of sense.
Anyway, I'm probably doing it more to face my own fears. It's something that I know I have to do. So, I'd like to know what people do to calm themselves before a flight. Do you drink alcohol? Do you take presecription drugs? If you take a prescription drug, how does it make you feel; can you actually sleep on the plane, which I can never do? Also, does the drug make you sleepy for the entire day; how long does it take to actually wear off?
Thanks for any advice you can give

 

[padams]

Check out www.fearofflying.com. I am working on this program and it is helping me.

Before I had children, I would sometimes have a drink to calm down. With children, I don't drink or take any of the prescription drugs like Xanax because if there really was an emergency, I would want to be able to function to deal with my kids. So, I just grip the seat armrests ...

Good luck! I am looking forward to reading other responses.

 

[pumba]

in a plane vs 25 on the road.....yah I will do it......call your doctor for advice on this.........they may perscribe something to calm you down.....I cant' take alot of meds cause I would be out of it for the duration of the trip.....I sit on the plane......hyperventilate and then always sit in the aisle seat......look straight down the middle people watching.......I then wait for the flight person to pass out cold drinks and I get some juice and chew on the ice.....still people watching and hope that eventually we land .....I hate flying and I am usually not very happy the few days before we leave......but I like the thought of leaving at six am and being in Disney at ten thirty or so.........Hope you get some answers........call your doctor and he will help you out I am sure

 

[Dan Murphy]

TP, I bet you do fine. I would say alcohol will not help but I know others here on the DIS have taken a mild sedative prescribed by a doctor and done well. Keep yourself busy, bring something to read or small project to work on.

As for your fear, it is the plane, heights, world tensions, anything specific?

Maybe this might be of help

 

[Kimnicki]

I can totally relate to your fear. Someone once told me that I wasn't afraid of flying, I was afraid of crashing. I start having sleepless nights about 2 weeks prior to flying. Our last trip (3/6/04) we had a connecting flight on the way down to Orlando. I was not too happy about having to take off and land more than once. Unfortunately our flight home had 2 connecting flights! That meant that I had to get on 5 planes in the course of one week. This is more than I fly in a few years. I did get a prescription for valium and used it on the way down. It did not affect how I reacted with my children at all. It was a pretty low dose. But it did seem to help me not get too crazy. I'm the kind of person who doesn't want to be talked to or move for at least the first 1/2 hour of the flight. I jump at any little noise I hear and hate to be surprised by the sound of the landing gear going up or down.

I can't believe it, but I did not take anything on the trip home. As we sat at the gate, I could see how many planes took off as we sat there. It made me realize how many planes there are in the sky at once and that there is nothing I can do. I felt a little better after that.

There is a book that I read a long time ago called "White Knuckles" you may want to look into it. I didn't want my fear to thwart any vacations I may want to take, because I can't drive everywhere. I just try and take it a day at a time!

Good luck,

Kim

 

[Lewski709]

Funny, Dan said what I was gonna say.

 

[Dodie]

I've had this problem all my life and am doing much better.
I highly recommend the following:

The website: www.fearofflying.com
The message boards: Fear of Flying Forum
The course that Dan recommended: Fear of Flying Help
The book: Flying Without Fear

 

[TiggerPiglet]

Thank you everyone. The links you posted I will definitely read through and probably pick up a book or two that was suggested.

Originally posted by Dan Murphy
As for your fear, it is the plane, heights, world tensions, anything specific?

I guess for me it's a control issue. You get on a plane, you can't see where you're going and it's being flown by a complete stranger. I sit there asking myself, is the pilot drunk; how much experience does he have? Will he be able to handle an emergency? I don't know why I'm so afraid of being in a plane crash, when I get in a car everyday and I don't give it a second thought. Rationally I know my changes of getting in a car crash are much greater than getting in a plane crash, but for some reason I'm terrified of being in a plane crash. Again, it's the control thing. When I drive, I know I'm not drunk, I won't take unnessary risks, will the pilot do that? I probably shouldn't have waited so long to fly again. The longer I've gone without flying, the worse my fear gets.
I've taken some of your advice and called my doctor for an appointment to see what she can give me. Although, I don't want something that will knock me out for the entire day, I want to enjoy myself once I get off the plane
Thanks everyone again. It actually made me feel better to read there are others who are flying, even though they're scared. So, if you can do it, so can I

 

[Serena]

Would visiting the airport and just watching all the planes go by help?

 

[palmtreegirl]

Do the fearofflyinghelp.com (the link Dan posted) program, it really worked for me.

 

[Gupsmom]

TiggerPiglet


We may very well be twins.....lol. I could have posted the exact same thing. For me it is all about control. I know driving is more deadly, but I have an element of control when we drive. I have a couple other points that bother me but I don't want to risk adding to your anxiety. Lol.

Anyway....I'm going to check out that webpage recommended in this thread. I know I will have to fly again in order to go everywhere I hope to go. I also don't want to pass my fear on to the kids.

As it stands, we are planning to fly out to Vegas (rent a car and do to DL, Grand Canyon, etc) in 2005. I'm sure your flight will be uneventful. I hope you have a great visit.

Jess

 

[winniedapooh]

One word.....Valium! Mild dose and helps greatly. I flew not even a month after 9/11 and had a fear prior to this so dr. gave me some and it made it much easier to calm down and relax and not feel like one giant panic attack!

 

[taylor1293]

I drink alcohol. Not to the point of being "drunk", just light headed and a little loopy . It takes about 5 beers to calm me, then another 1 or 2 on the plane depending on how long the flight is.

My close friend who is also deathly afraid of flying gets a prescription from her doctor and she says it helps her.

I wish you the best of luck, I completely understand what you are feeling. Everytime I fly I say that I'll never do it again, but something always changes that.

Good luck

Teresa

 

[Mimi Q]

Valium. It's the only way to fly.

 

[TiggerPiglet]

Thanks again everyone, your advice has really helped me.

Dan, I read the link you gave me and it really was insightful. In fact, I printed out a couple of pages to help me on the flight.

I plan on seeing my doctor next week. I'm not sure if I'll actually take any medication, but it might be nice just to have it, like a security blanket.

Gupsmom, we're actually planning on going to the Grand Canyon too while we're there. We went there the last time we went to Vegas 10 years ago, now we'd like the kids to see it. Like you, I too don't want to pass my fear down to my kids. The last time we flew my older DD was only 3 and my younger DD has never flown. Now they're 8 and 4, so they would definitely be aware of my fear. So, I'm really going to have to smile a lot and hope they don't notice

Serena, I'm not sure if watching the planes will help me, but maybe when we get to the airport I'll try to watch them, it can't hurt

Thanks again everyone.

 

[chell]

If you do get any medication from your doctor you might want to take one at home a few days before your trip to see how you will react. That was what my doctor had suggest to me - just in case it has the opposite effect on you. For me it didn't do anything at all. What I do is bring along a portable cd player and my favorite cd's. As soon as I can turn it on I do and it helps to relax me.

 

[linnettevl]

I do agree with others about valium, I cancelled my trip 5 time and paid extra each time that I made changes then finally I went to see the doctor and he gave me a low dose valium you take it 30 minutes before flying I don't know if it was a placebo effect but I did not have any problems did not fall asleep,enjoyed my trip and on my trip back to home I did not take the medicine but had books and listened to music and play games with my children.
just don't think about it and enjoy your trip!!!!!

 

[daughter_of_amid_chaos]

When you are taking off...talk and talk and talk to anyone who will listen.

I flew home yesterday and both the woman next to me and I are fearful of flying. We started talking while on the ground and kept talking the entire time. Neither of us even noticed take off.

 

[tigercat]

I have used Arnica a homeopathic medicine. It doesn't to anything to you like Valium but it is for acute situations like this.
tigercat