Advice needed, to move or stay the course

[2moveornot]

Hi fellow DIS members, I want to first say that I am a member but I made this new name up because I want to remain even more anonymous.

So like the title says I’m need of some advice. right before the holidays Nov 1st to be exact our company did a mass layoff one or our main contracts was postponed and another one was flat out cancelled. Well thank god that we have been able to make it by so far. as of today I found out that our company won’t start the “postpone” project until April so we should be back to work by mid to late April (if it doesn’t get postpone again) BUT I only have enough savings $12k including my un employment to get me thru March. So here are my options and I’m having a hard time deciding what to do. Just so you know it’s Me DW (sahm has been looking every day since we got the news here in CA with no luck) DD9 DS3

Option 1 stay the course hope we start mid-April and if we do start mid-April worst that will happen is some payments will be late…. But we stay in a safe neighborhood with great schools (gets a 10 on greatschools) but continue to pay $3600 a month in bills plus food $400

Option 2 cancel my current lease I lose my deposit of $1700 since it will be used for the cancellation fee and cleaning fee But I get to stay 1 month free since they have my last month’s rent. Then move into a less expensive apartment BUT unfortunately it would be in a not so good part of town (I lived there before pretty much I couldn’t leave anything on my fenced patio because it was stolen (2 bikes got stolen) and you could smell weed all the time, the school only got a 4 on great schools, pretty much why I left that area. But my bills drop to $3200 plus food $400 and but I would have to put a new deposit down & moving expenses about $600 so when it’s all said and done this plan would get me thru April

Option 3 Relocate to Utah My DW has gotten plenty of phone interviews, 2 of them wanted her to start ASAP but obviously she can’t do that since we aren’t there. I called one of my companies competitor and spoke to the hiring manager pretty much he said I have a job waiting for me if I decide to move their but I would take a HUGE pay cut so DW would have to work full time and now we have day care expenses so monthly bills $2700 plus food $400 moving expenses and deposit $1200 But we have jobs (or so I hope) if the jobs fall thru then the rest of savings would get us thru April as well.

One more thing to add we lived in Utahfor 3 months when I had a job assignment out their then came back to CA but since we both liked it so much we moved out their to UT but only lasted 6 months due to wife missing family, I’ve talked to my wife about that and she says she now realizes that living in Utah was a much better place to raise the family, still what if we get there and she gets home sick again do I just shoot her this time ok I know I can’t do that something about a law not allowing it, plus I do love her hence why we moved back the first time

 

[pat fan]

On paper I would vote option 3, but I know it isn't always as easy as that. The kids are at a decent age for the move,m though. There is that to consider. Young enough to make new friends, not like moving a couple of teenagers

Is the option 2 neighborhood a "serious" crime neighborhood? I mean, sometimes bikes get stolen but it's not a "serious crime" neighborhood. KWIM? If it has serious issues, I would avoid that option. Nothing is really worth putting your family in harms way if you can help it.

My DH would be all over option 3 if given the chance, just sayin

 

[chris31997]

Option 3 is really your best option, hard on family all the way around. But you both have jobs. I would not make the move unless one of you have a job.

Option 1 is the second best

Option 2 I don't think is really an option, as a SAHM But counting moving cost, safety and the weed smell, it is off the table as far as I would say.

Just my 2 cents

 

[lauradis]

3,2,1 in that order always move to make money.

Op what happens if the company never needs all its employee back?, you wait then have no money, still need to move.

By the way good job on the emergency fund

 

[iluvallthingsdisney]

Option 3. Your current company doesn't seem to stable, lot's of what if's there.

 

[MinnieLovesMickey12]

I definitely would not move to the unsafe area especially if it is only going to save you $400 a month. That won't do anything really.

I like new adventures so I would probably vote for the move to Utah.

 

[gracie1]

Hi fellow DIS members, I want to first say that I am a member but I made this new name up because I want to remain even more anonymous. So like the title says I’m need of some advice. right before the holidays Nov 1st to be exact our company did a mass layoff one or our main contracts was postponed and another one was flat out cancelled. Well thank god that we have been able to make it by so far. as of today I found out that our company won’t start the “postpone” project until April so we should be back to work by mid to late April (if it doesn’t get postpone again) BUT I only have enough savings $12k including my un employment to get me thru March. So here are my options and I’m having a hard time deciding what to do. Just so you know it’s Me DW (sahm has been looking every day since we got the news here in CA with no luck) DD9 DS3 Option 1 stay the course hope we start mid-April and if we do start mid-April worst that will happen is some payments will be late…. But we stay in a safe neighborhood with great schools (gets a 10 on greatschools) but continue to pay $3600 a month in bills plus food $400 Option 2 cancel my current lease I lose my deposit of $1700 since it will be used for the cancellation fee and cleaning fee But I get to stay 1 month free since they have my last month’s rent. Then move into a less expensive apartment BUT unfortunately it would be in a not so good part of town (I lived there before pretty much I couldn’t leave anything on my fenced patio because it was stolen (2 bikes got stolen) and you could smell weed all the time, the school only got a 4 on great schools, pretty much why I left that area. But my bills drop to $3200 plus food $400 and but I would have to put a new deposit down & moving expenses about $600 so when it’s all said and done this plan would get me thru April Option 3 Relocate to Utah My DW has gotten plenty of phone interviews, 2 of them wanted her to start ASAP but obviously she can’t do that since we aren’t there. I called one of my companies competitor and spoke to the hiring manager pretty much he said I have a job waiting for me if I decide to move their but I would take a HUGE pay cut so DW would have to work full time and now we have day care expenses so monthly bills $2700 plus food $400 moving expenses and deposit $1200 But we have jobs (or so I hope) if the jobs fall thru then the rest of savings would get us thru April as well. One more thing to add we lived in Utahfor 3 months when I had a job assignment out their then came back to CA but since we both liked it so much we moved out their to UT but only lasted 6 months due to wife missing family, I’ve talked to my wife about that and she says she now realizes that living in Utah was a much better place to raise the family, still what if we get there and she gets home sick again do I just shoot her this time ok I know I can’t do that something about a law not allowing it, plus I do love her hence why we moved back the first time

With option 3 does that amount also include the cost of daycare? And if your taking a huge paucity wouldn't you still be in the same situation financially? I wouldn't move to an unsafe neighborhood either for $400.

 

[Plum Pirate]

Option 2 would be off the table for me, no question about it. All that hassle and possible danger is not worth a savings of $400 a month, especially when you may find yourself in a quandary again if your job doesn't resume in April as you hope.

Like the PP said, on paper, option 3 is clearly the way to go. At the least your DW will be employed and there is a good possibility you may both have jobs. That said, I do recognize how hard it is to have two working parents with no family back up, and that could be a real problem (what happens when a child is sick or there is a school cancellation or delay?). Of course, there is nothing wrong with you being a SAHD for a while as long as you are willing to take on the household responsibilities.

If you do move, I would take this opportunity to adjust my living expenses to the lowest acceptable point to continue to build your rainy day fund. Sounds like you have done a great job already! Good luck no matter what you decide.

 

[ShayBells]

Never would do option two. Never.

The other two options are hard. I think it would boil down to .. Does your wife want to work? If she's only considering it so you guys have money.. I'd say stay and go with option one. If she wants to work I'd say go with option three.

Good luck!

Sent from my iPhone using DISBoards

 

[jdh008]

I'll echo what others have said and just suggest you throw option 2 out.

If there is ANY chance that the project that is set to start in April is postponed again, I would go with option 3. Monetarily, it does sound like the safest option, but there are the drawbacks that you talked about in the original post.

If it were me, I would explore option 1 a little further. April is still a long way out. Even if it's only something temporary, that might be time for one of you to find a small part-time gig to get you through. Assuming you would only need the extra income for a couple of months, it's not like you have to love the work.

I would also be tempted to look into where I could trim my budget. I'm not insinuating that you haven't done this already, but it was what came to mind. Maybe you can downsize your cell phone plan, or go without cable and/or internet for a couple of months.

It sounds like the option of moving to Utah is a viable one, but I would just be tempted to exhaust all avenues to avoid uprooting. Can you tell I hate moving?

In any event, good luck to you. I hope you find a resolution for you and your family quickly.

 

[kaytieeldr]

Three, then one, then a very distant two. Two isn't much of a monetary change, especially considering the downgrade in lifestyle. Three is themost responsible option, but it's a big upheaval.

Have you investigated any type of public assistanc if you stay put? I recently discovered I'm eligible for fuel assistance while out of work.

 

[Nayan]

I would choose one, three and as a last resort two. I would cut out everything I could think of and stay where you are, just based on the fact that you stated you only had enough money to last through March. If you moved, that would be a big expense (moving isn't cheap) and if something happened along the way you would could wipe out whatever you have left.

I would only do three if it was guaranteed (in writing) that you had a job and even then if both of you worked you would have not only a pay cut but the added expense of child-care.

 

[runwad]

I vote for 1 and really up your job search. If that doesn't work; do you not have family in the area that could take you in until better times arrive? I'd not want to move away from family. I'd do all I could to find a job at your present location while cutting the budget to the bones.

 

[southlakejr]

I would choose option 3. As a fellow CA resident, this state is expensive. Ridiculously so. And quite honestly, even taking a pay cut elsewhere tends to net you a lower cost of living. Being away from family sucks. But, Utah is still close enough that you can still make trips by car instead of flying. Maybe look at it with the intention of visiting a certain number of times?

Option 2 doesn't save you enough money to be worth it. While school ratings don't necessarily tell the whole story, crime does.


Option 1 seems excessively risky. (Full disclosure, I have a low risk threshold). If the job comes through, you're still facing the possibility of late bills, etc. But if the contract doesn't start as expected? You're now in a really bad place and approaching panic/danger zone

 

[LJSquishy]

I think staying put is the wisest decision for now unless you can BOTH line up employment in Utah BEFORE moving there. It is not smart to move "hoping" one or both of you will find work there. You didn't state if your total cost in scenario #3 included full time child are or not...if not, it doesn't seem to make sense to move there just based on that alone.

Just stay put and stick it out. Cut back on everything you possibly can starting now. Do you have items you can sell that you're not using? Outgrown kid's clothing, toys, etc? Can either of you get a part time job in the evenings to avoid child care? I'm a housewife who has tried casually to find a part time job off and on for several years but no one wants to hire me because I haven't worked in 7 years...but if I really had to work, I would be looking for ANY type of work to make ends meet, such as babysitting or house cleaning. Can your wife take in a child to watch during the day?

If you really think there is no way to pay your bills through April, call them now and see if there is anything they can help you with whether it be defer a payment or even put a note on your accounts stating your situation. If you have cable tv, smartphones, etc, consider doing without for now. You may get an unemployment extension as well.

Moving is very expensive...thousands of dollars. You really can't afford to move if your job in Utah would pay considerably less money.

 

[2moveornot]

Is the option 2 neighborhood a "serious" crime neighborhood? I mean, sometimes bikes get stolen but it's not a "serious crime" neighborhood. KWIM? If it has serious issues, I would avoid that option. Nothing is really worth putting your family in harms way if you can help it.

unfortunately after doing more research on the area and apartment complex it seems like its gotten worse so I agree with you and the rest I think option 2 is out for sure in a way I think I knew this but sometimes I need to hear it from a 3rd point of view.

Option 2 I don't think is really an option, as a SAHM But counting moving cost, safety and the weed smell, it is off the table as far as I would say.

Just my 2 cents

nope not going to be an option any more my DW just reminded me about my tire being slashed when we first moved in the first time and this was before it got as bad as the reviews are making it look

3,2,1 in that order always move to make money.

Op what happens if the company never needs all its employee back?, you wait then have no money, still need to move.

By the way good job on the emergency fund

I thought about what would happen if they don't bring us all back but since I'm so stressed out I tried to push it to the back and not think about it, I keep telling my self I'm 1 of only 2 guys in the company that knows how to do what we do and to train a new person would take months but still the chance is their.
thanks for the reply

Option 3. Your current company doesn't seem to stable, lot's of what if's there.

thanks it sure seems like its the way to go but the uncertainty and "what if" is stopping me from pulling the trigger, then again I guess that just life.

I definitely would not move to the unsafe area especially if it is only going to save you $400 a month. That won't do anything really.

I like new adventures so I would probably vote for the move to Utah.

new adventures sounds fun

With option 3 does that amount also include the cost of daycare? And if your taking a huge paucity wouldn't you still be in the same situation financially? I wouldn't move to an unsafe neighborhood either for $400.

Surprisingly yes that includes daycare. I guess do to the pay cut I would and wouldn't be in the same situation here in CA I make enough to be able to afford DW to stay at home and still live a very comfortable life, since the cost of living is less expensive out in UT my pay rate would be almost half of what I make in California not quite but close so DW would need to work to cover about 20% of bills and the rest of her money would be used for savings and to continue to live comfortable.

Like the PP said, on paper, option 3 is clearly the way to go. At the least your DW will be employed and there is a good possibility you may both have jobs. That said, I do recognize how hard it is to have two working parents with no family back up, and that could be a real problem (what happens when a child is sick or there is a school cancellation or delay?). Of course, there is nothing wrong with you being a SAHD for a while as long as you are willing to take on the household responsibilities.

If you do move, I would take this opportunity to adjust my living expenses to the lowest acceptable point to continue to build your rainy day fund. Sounds like you have done a great job already! Good luck no matter what you decide.

this has been a HUGE concern for me, not having any family around, not that we relay on them but its still nice to know that if we need them they are their.

yes we keep trying to lower our monthly bills unfortunately we are stuck in contracts and the cancelation fees seem to out weigh the savings best we can do with cable is lower it to the lowest package but you bet this will be something that will be cancelled as soon as contract is over.

regarding being a SAHD so far I'm loving it and so are the kids BUT I could not do that for ever, SAHMs THANK YOU you all have very hard hard jobs that never end, and now I know my my DW would talk my ear off when I got home

Never would do option two. Never.

The other two options are hard. I think it would boil down to .. Does your wife want to work? If she's only considering it so you guys have money.. I'd say stay and go with option one. If she wants to work I'd say go with option three.

Good luck!

Sent from my iPhone using DISBoards

well dw keeps saying she wants to go back to work the original plan was that she would return to work when DS started 1st grade

It sounds like the option of moving to Utah is a viable one, but I would just be tempted to exhaust all avenues to avoid uprooting. Can you tell I hate moving?

In any event, good luck to you. I hope you find a resolution for you and your family quickly.

nope not to happy about uprooting or even moving but i'm just at a loss, and new adventures sure makes it sound fun.

Have you investigated any type of public assistanc if you stay put? I recently discovered I'm eligible for fuel assistance while out of work.

We looked into but I guess we aren't eligible do to our savings

I would choose one, three and as a last resort two. I would cut out everything I could think of and stay where you are, just based on the fact that you stated you only had enough money to last through March. If you moved, that would be a big expense (moving isn't cheap) and if something happened along the way you would could wipe out whatever you have left.

I would only do three if it was guaranteed (in writing) that you had a job and even then if both of you worked you would have not only a pay cut but the added expense of child-care.

if I move I would have enough to get me all thru April, we have been discussing what we will take and not take if we move and downsize pretty much we are going to rent a uhual 6x12 trail or a 16ft Penske and what fit fits and what doesn't gets sold or donated

unfortunately must jobs are "at will employment" so even if the offer is in writing they can let you go the day you show up to work and give no reason, that's another negative

I vote for 1 and really up your job search. If that doesn't work; do you not have family in the area that could take you in until better times arrive? I'd not want to move away from family. I'd do all I could to find a job at your present location while cutting the budget to the bones.

we do have family that we could temp move in with but the problem would be that we don't have a definite date of how long we would be with them and they seem to like to know exactly what the plan is, that's just how they are nothing wrong with knowing how long someone is going to stay, what im trying to say if I don't want move in with them and over welcome our stay that it ruins the relationship.

I would choose option 3. As a fellow CA resident, this state is expensive. Ridiculously so. And quite honestly, even taking a pay cut elsewhere tends to net you a lower cost of living. Being away from family sucks. But, Utah is still close enough that you can still make trips by car instead of flying. Maybe look at it with the intention of visiting a certain number of times?
Option 2 doesn't save you enough money to be worth it. While school ratings don't necessarily tell the whole story, crime does.


Option 1 seems excessively risky. (Full disclosure, I have a low risk threshold). If the job comes through, you're still facing the possibility of late bills, etc. But if the contract doesn't start as expected? You're now in a really bad place and approaching panic/danger zone

its funny because that's what I said to DW, "well I guess if we move we could make it a point to have annual vacations to Disneyland and it would seem even more special since now it would only be ones a yr" right now we go ALOT since the passes are already paid for.

I understand, I too feel like I have a low risk thresh hold, I was talking to a friend of mine that was also laid off and he tells me to relax and just enjoy the time off, then he tells me he has no savings but isn't worried because "things will work out" really im sure they will work out but how can he not be worried


Thank you all for your honest opinions. It helps to hear what you all think specially since its from a 3rd point of view

 

[crisi]

We've made the decision to NOT move to California about five times now and to stay in Minnesota.

California can be beautiful, and it can be a very nice place to live. But it is nearly impossible for my husband to get paid enough in California for us to come close to maintaining our standard of living and have our kids in good schools. Its just too expensive. (We are talking 50%+ pay increases that don't cover the delta). We'd have half the house for twice the money with a longer commute. Same thing with the opportunities he has had in Boston.

I think your long term opportunities are better in Utah. It sounds like your wife will be able to quickly find a job (and if she gets another "start tomorrow" job she should think about taking it and living in a cheap motel while you move the kids).

The daycare expenses won't last forever and you'll be surprised how much farther your money goes in Utah.

 

[kellietony]

A couple years ago, I was told that if work didn't pick up, I would be let go. Well time went by and nothing happened, so I didn't really look for anything else, as that place worked well for our situation, paid me well, and was close to home. 3 months ago, I was unceremoniously let go.

While not exactly like your situation, it is similar. But to me the moral of the story is this: Fool me once, shame on them. Fool me twice, shame on me.

In your Option 1, you hope that everything rights itself in April and you go back to work. But that hinges on the next contract coming in, and the next, and the next. They've already dumped you once, they will do it again if need be.

Don't let them fool you twice. What are the chances of you rebuilding your nest egg in time for the next layoff? Where will you end up if that happens?

Since you are collecting UI, your getting a part time job right now to supplement would kill your UI. So unless it's under the table, that's not really an option. Your wife could get something. Not sure what she does for a living, but it can be anything, even Toys R Us! For $8-10/hr for 15 hours, you would make up that $400 savings you talk about in Option 2 - which is not even an option in my opinion. DW can make that easily to get you by until April.

Best option IMHO: Option 3 - it gives you a chance to start new. It puts YOU in control of YOUR life. Well, at least as much as any non-union tenured job can! It doesn't leave you making late payments, stressing about whether you're going to be rehired, hoping to not be laid off again, etc. Utah is not so far that you can't visit quite often. Less income is expected once you move out of California, but your quality of life should be better. And daycare will drop down as they get older. So in a couple years, your income will immediately increase. Consider it a non-permanent expense with an end date, like a car loan. Then you can forecast where you will be in a couple years, not focus on where you currently are. Daycare is temporary, your jobs/life aren't, so keep that in perspective.

Good luck in whatever you choose.

 

[dpswift]

I have put a lot of thought into this as yours is an important question.

Years ago when my first 4 children were young I relied on my mother a great deal moving would have been hard on me. I also did a great deal of help for DH's elderly mother. At that time Option 3 would have been difficult for me. It would have been option1 all the way. BTY DH has had many layoffs over the years.

Now years later both our mothers have been gone for many years. Our youngest DS is 11 the other 4 have graduated HS. DH was laid off again last January, He is back to work however, looking around there is really not much here for us anymore. My father spends most of his time in Florida, and DH's siblings have all moved away. I honestly wish that we had moved a few years back.

You need to do some soul searching and ask yourselves some questions.

1 What does the future hold for us here?

2 What will your future be like in Utah?

3 What are your job prospects here and there?

4 Can your wife be happy away from her family? If so how often will she need to visit?

5 What are your in laws long term plans? If they are planning on moving in the next few years that should be taken into consideration.

Will your wife be happy working full time long term?

Good luck and I wish the best for you.

 

[Judique]

I guess I would be looking for option 4.

Utah would not appeal to me.

However, of all your options, 3 looks like the most proactive.