rt2dz said:2) Go ahead and go to bed angry. Usually cooler heads will prevail in the morning and you can discuss things instead of arguing over things. It's amazing what a good night's sleep can do for you in being able to see things from different prepective.
I was going to say the same thing! Some people (like my dh) actually need some time to stew before they are willing, or even able, to deal with their thoughts and discuss things.
I'd love to get it all right out on the table, and would certainly sleep better if it was dealt with before bedtime, but it isn't all about me. So my advice will be "take your partner's needs into account - even when you're angry!"