Abusive Disney Guests...When To Interfere?

[Griggle]

Be bully to someone in front of me, be prepared to get publically humiliate by yours truly. There is no room in my world for a person like that. And I'm not going to step aside without calling you to the floor.

While the intent is to stick up for someone who is being verbally abused, doesn't this kind of a position also make one an "abuser" ( albeit of an abuser ) ?

Where does it then end?

I've come across this once - and left the line to call for a manager to bring it to their attention. It's management's job to handle this kind of a situation. Why escalate something that could possibly have the potential of going the way of a bar room brawl?

 

[emmagata]

Originally posted by Griggle
While the intent is to stick up for someone who is being verbally abused, doesn't this kind of a position also make one an "abuser" ( albeit of an abuser ) ?

Absolutely not!! There is , for the most part, only one thing these people respond to. And it's a taste of what they dish out. Maybe, just maybe, someone that's close to this person will take the opportunity to help them understand what a ******* they can be.

Where does it then end?

Hopefully it ends with a successful therapy session.

I've come across this once - and left the line to call for a manager to bring it to their attention. It's management's job to handle this kind of a situation. Why escalate something that could possibly have the potential of going the way of a bar room brawl?

Because maybe *I* want to get the applause instead of letting the manager have it.

Another reason is that the manager has limited options. He can toss the person out and if they don't leave, call security and/or the police and have the person tossed out. I would bet that a manager(a smart one) wouldn't get into a shouting match with a customer.

 

[NeverEnufWDW]

Just some more proof of the further decline of our society.

There was a time when we would stick up for the little guys without question and put the bad eggs in their place -- now people are murdered in broad daylight because no one wants to get involved (real reason: everyone has become meek cowards).

Of course I would stick up for a CM being attacked ....

Folks, the barbarians are at the gate, and its up to every one of us to knock them back......

 

[ebaynut31]

I can only tell you what I have done in the past. I have gone up to that cm who has just taken the abuse and thank them for what they do. Whether it makes a difference or not, I don't know. I give them a friendly smile if I can't go talk with them.

I appreciate the fact that they are there working for everyone to have a good vacation.

I just don't get nasty people!

 

[dianeschlicht]

On another incident at the All Star Sports in mid July, we were checking in and the line was very very long, we waited about 30 minutes to check in. There was a mom & 2 kids ahead of us & you could tell that the mom was quite upset. When she finally got up to the counter, she started yelling about how SHE paid a fortune to have a wonderful vacation & SHE should receive better treatment than this & that HER vacation was now ruined because SHE had to wait.

LOL! What would she have done if she was staying at an expensive resort instead of the All Stars?

 

[Kimberle]

I haven't read the other responses.

Luckly, I haven't seen anything "too bad". What I do is try & give the Cm (or str employee) a "verbal hug". I'll say something like "boy, I think they need to crawl back in bed...." & just reassure the CM (or str employee) that they are doing a great job & not to let the "cranky franky" get to them.

 

[Gette88]

Originally posted by capegirl
Tink 10, you are right. We too have witnessed alot of rude behavior at the resorts and parks. We have even had bullies try to intimidate us "out of our seats" at both parades and Illuminations.
One woman insisted on standing in the middle of a roped off area during a MK parade. She was asked to move several times by a CM, and each time she returned to the same spot. The poor CM finally gave up.

I'm glad it's not just me. This has happened to my family 3 times, once at Illuminations once on the parade route on Main St. and once at the hoedown in Frontier Land. It's very frustrating to be waiting on the parade route for a 1/2 hour or however long and have people walk up last minute and try to bully you to move. DH and I always give up our spots so kids can see and will continue to do so but it makes it hard when their parents can be so rude. Life is to short to walk around with a bad attitude. We have also seen people stand in the roped off areas and have also seen the CM's give up on trying to make them move. The CM's have a hard job working with the public and they have to walk such a fine line trying to keep everyone happy. It's impossible.

 

[RickinNYC]

Originally posted by Griggle
While the intent is to stick up for someone who is being verbally abused, doesn't this kind of a position also make one an "abuser" ( albeit of an abuser ) ?

Where does it then end?

I've come across this once - and left the line to call for a manager to bring it to their attention. It's management's job to handle this kind of a situation. Why escalate something that could possibly have the potential of going the way of a bar room brawl?

I still have to stand by my initial opinion in being one of those that typically sticks up for others when they're being pushed around or verbally abused. Is it my business? Not if you want to be technical. However, I do think it's my business, everyone's business, simply because we are all humans and should always look out for each other.

Rest assured, I do NOT by any means, look for opportunities. I certainly don't jump when I see every single slight. I use my judgement and act upon it.

Had the woman I had seen simply been gruff or rude or let the incident go after an idle comment or two, I wouldn't have intervened. I'd have simply written her off in my mind as a complete waste of the air that I breath and consider her a worthless individual. But she did not let it go. In fact, she seemed to get more pleasure when tears came to the eyes of the Cast Member. No way would I have looked the other way.

 

[Doug123]

Let me start off by saying I believe it totally depends on the situation, and the multitude of factors that define that situation, before I decide whether to get involved or not.

"Getting involved" could mean direct confrontation, getting security or a manager, or -- as another poster did -- videotaping the raging lunitic and sending it to Disney directly.

With that said, it's too bad so many people on this thread feel it's not their problem if it doens't directly affect them. That's one of the problems with our society in general, and only encourages these jerks more (as one of the posters pointed out). If you allow a child or adult to "get away with something" by acting a certain way, they're going to act that way again and again. Adults need to be "taught" or "educated" just as much as a kid, in some cases. We are all part of this society, and as such have a responsibility to make it a better place.

 

[Griggle]

With that said, it's too bad so many people on this thread feel it's not their problem if it doens't directly affect them.

I don't think anyone has said that. What some have said, is that they would not intervene. In the case of "a scene" I don't think silence by bystanders is construed as acceptance. Some people just aren't into verbal confrontation, even if they find themselves in the role as the abusee. Escalation of the scene doesn't make matters better; depending on who you're dealing with - it could make matters worse.

The problem would be if everyone here was saying that they were indifferent to the situation. No one here has said that. Many have said that they've made a point of saying something to the CM to show they are not indifferent to it. Support does not necessiarily have to be vocalized for all to hear.

That's one of the problems with our society in general, and only encourages these jerks more (as one of the posters pointed out). If you allow a child or adult to "get away with something" by acting a certain way, they're going to act that way again and again.

Do you really thing that by having a confrontation with a verbal abuser that it will cause him/her to think twice about doing it again the future? I somehow doubt it would. As some have pointed out - there are most definately those that get off on it. Changes in their behavior will not come about by someone going off on them.

Adults need to be "taught" or "educated" just as much as a kid, in some cases. We are all part of this society, and as such have a responsibility to make it a better place.

What does yelling at a yeller teach anyone???? That it's okay to yell as long as I'm the one doing the yelling and I'm doing it for what I perceive to be for the right reason???

It's kindof like a parent hitting their child for hitting.........what's learned from that lesson?

 

[AngieBelle]

I think one of the best things you can do is say a word of kindness to the CM who's being given a hard time by another guest. As a CM myself, I can't tell you how much it is appreciated.

At the Pocahontas show, the first 4 rows are reserved for children only. Every so often, other parents will help me keep adults out of the kids section. I love when they do that.

 

[the redhead]

When I worked at Epcot as a Friendship boat captain, part of my responsibility was handling crowd control for Illuminations. One evening when I was working in the seated section near the rose garden, a man got very angry with me because I repeatedly asked him to sit down, because there is no standing allowed in the area during the show. He was located up front, near the railing. Mid way through the show, when I had gone over to him again to ask him to sit so as to not block the view of those behind him, he got physical with me and pushed me into the railing. Luckily, another guest seated close by intervened and it allowed someone to call security to help me out before I got really hurt. I was really glad the guest decided to intervene in that case.

 

[Dancind]

The lady demanding a free lunch had probably gotten one before, using the same tactics. It does work, sometimes. I just wish she'd try it on an airline flight, she'd get arrested. Diana

 

[Doug123]

Originally posted by Doug123
"Getting involved" could mean direct confrontation, getting security or a manager, or -- as another poster did -- videotaping the raging lunitic and sending it to Disney directly.

Read what I said, Griggle. I agree with you on this point!

Originally posted by Griggle
I don't think silence by bystanders is construed as acceptance. Some people just aren't into verbal confrontation, even if they find themselves in the role as the abusee.

I would have to say that not getting involved IS a certain form of acceptance. To cite an admitably somewhat extreme example, is it right to sidestep a man slowly bleeding to death in the street? Occationally you do hear of people coming upon others in trouble and just walking on by.

 

[always quiet]

I will stand up if the person on the receiving end of such horrible behavior is a child, be it one of my own or a strangers. If I would ever see (knock on wood, I haven't yet!) someone freaking out on a CM because of a simple human error, I would tell the person if they can do better, than show us how it's done! I can't see me reverting to yelling and screaming UNLESS someone is really hurting one of my kids (then stand back!! ) I also would be quick to tell the CM how much I appreciate all that they do!

 

[cindysteve]

I will always intervene if the person's horrible behavior is affecting a child (eg- person cuts in line in front of a child). I will also intervene if one child is being rude to another. I will kindly point out to a person abusing an employee of any establishment that that person only works here, you might want to discuss things further with their supervisor. Sometime young and/or startled people forget that they can call their supervisor to solve the problem.

 

[GAIL HAYDEN]

Originally posted by Eeyore1954
I disagree. The people being discussed here are not children, they are adults. It's not my place to try to teach some rude adult basic etiquette. If they didn't learn this as a child, it's probably too late to teach them now (although I dislike taking such a pessimistic view). I'd like to believe most people would realize their rude behavior and correct it ... but I am a firm believe in MYOB in public. Now if the person became physically abusive, then I'd probably do something to intervene... but I've never encountered that yet. (Thankfully!) I agree ... and more power to those who choose to play etiquette cop. That's just not a role I choose to play in real life.

It is not a matter of playing etiquette cop, it is a matter of sticking up for someone else. I have no intention of trying to teach boorish buffoons manners, but, I will not see someone in a position where they cannot defend themselves being berated by someone with a mean temper or an entitlement mentality.

 

[GAIL HAYDEN]

Originally posted by Eeyore1954
I don't know of anyone in any position that cannot defend themselves, if that defense is nothing more than involving one's immediate superior in the situation.

I agree that there is no excuse for treating a CM badly, however, I do not believe it's my responsibility as a guest to come to the employee's defense. Some people need to learn how to separate themselves from the situation and know when to call in the reinforcements (another CM or their manager). I don't work for Disney security and I'm certainly not going to volunteer to become some CM's temporary manager.

This is where we will have to agree to disagree. It is not up to you to become a CM's manager, but, as a human being, I would find it very inhuman not to defend another.
what would you do if you saw someone beating an animal or child? Say "opps, not my problem" and walk away? I really hope not.
I have worked with the public far too long and would have, a few times, welcomed a customer's "interferance". People can be so nasty.

 

[Deb & Bill]

If the passengers on that flight over PA on 9/11 hadn't reacted to the situation, the plane might have crashed in a place where even more lives could have been lost.

To those of you who defend the weaker from the bullies, thanks.

 

[JenBlaze]

I realize this is not a Disney situation, but bear with me.

I worked as a receptionist for a doctor's office for 6 months. The doctor was a good one - the best in his specialty in my city, actually, but there was one thing the man could not get through his head. He didn't seem to realize that stopping mid-appointment to call his wife four times a day was a real problem. Because of his sometimes hour-long calls, the schedule got backed up every day to the point where the patients had a 2 hour wait just to get in.

One day the wait was 4 hours. I could understand the frustration and anger of the people having to wait, but not their reponses. Every 15 minutes, I got screamed at, cursed at, called names, and insulted in every way possible, when their wait time was in no way my fault. I got called names that SAILORS don't use. The worst part was that per that doctor, I couldn't do anything in my defense.

If even one person had stepped up and tried to help me out that day, I can't tell you how immensely grateful I would have been.

I bet some of the CMs are in that exact same situation, and they'd appreciate an assist too, even if it's just a "you did fine, that guy was just a jerk" after the fact.