A wife of a train conductor vent

[ducklite]

The reason I made the comment that I did was your DH's being cranky, ignoring the kids and playing X-Box instead, and basically making snippish remarks to you. That's not healthy in a relationship, and definitely not fair to the kids.

Many jobs require short notice schedule changes and for spouses to travel and be away from home for a few days at a time. It sounds like you are having trouble with his traveling a few nights a week. I don't know how old you are, but it seems that maybe you are insecure in your relationship with him, or too needy on him.

My DH works three weeks out of the month 1000 miles from here. I haven't seen him in 18 days now. But I'm not moping around about it, I'm persuing activities that I enjoy and staying busy. Not pining away about the fact that he's gone.

I really think that you need to learn some coping skills, and he needs to stop obsessing about his job and use his time off spending time with his family. Otherwise you're headed down a bad road. I urge you to get some counseling. I'm really not trying to bash you, just trying to offer some advice which I think will help you both have a better relationship. And face it, this is all having a negative impact on your kids.

Anne

 

[ntburns22]

The reason I made the comment that I did was your DH's being cranky, ignoring the kids and playing X-Box instead, and basically making snippish remarks to you. That's not healthy in a relationship, and definitely not fair to the kids.

Many jobs require short notice schedule changes and for spouses to travel and be away from home for a few days at a time. It sounds like you are having trouble with his traveling a few nights a week. I don't know how old you are, but it seems that maybe you are insecure in your relationship with him, or too needy on him.

My DH works three weeks out of the month 1000 miles from here. I haven't seen him in 18 days now. But I'm not moping around about it, I'm persuing activities that I enjoy and staying busy. Not pining away about the fact that he's gone.

I really think that you need to learn some coping skills, and he needs to stop obsessing about his job and use his time off spending time with his family. Otherwise you're headed down a bad road. I urge you to get some counseling. I'm really not trying to bash you, just trying to offer some advice which I think will help you both have a better relationship. And face it, this is all having a negative impact on your kids.

Anne

Too be honest I was fine with his job until we moved away from everything and everyone.

I have a 35 minute drive just to go to a real grocery store. I will admit I am needy on him since we moved and I was a very independent person. We did 3 years of the long distance realationship thing before we got married because he was in the Marines. I was fine with it. My dad is a fire chief that works 24 on 48 off so I grew up with my dad not home everynight but atleast it was a set shift so we knew when he would be home. I just don't feel comfortable here alone all the time. I have no one to fall back on now. I have even had to cancel my dentist appointments three times because I have no one to watch the kids for me.

When he was gone for training for a month before we moved I was fine. Because he wasn't in and out every couple of days. I do realize that other couples go through this too. The RR is tough no ifs ands or buts about it. Thanks for all your thoughts and input.