A Sensible Dinner - Pearlieq's Journal

[Jane E.]

Pearliq, that was scary. I hope you're feeling better. Nothing is worse than getting the darn flu. Get feeling better & take things easy.

 

[toystoryduo]

Pearlieq~

I am so sorry to hear that you are sick. I am sending some prayers and your way for a quick and complete healing. Please be sure and take extra special, good care of you while you're sick, okay?

Take care.

 

[pearlieq]

1/8/06

Thanks so much for the good wishes! I'm definitely feeling some progress today. I had some animal crackers and applesauce this morning and they only made me a little skeevy, which is definitely progress.

I can tell I'm getting better because I'm bored out of my mind!!! DH has been a real sweetheart taking care of me--thank goodness he got a flu shot! My right hip is killing me--too much time sitting and in bed. I feel like an old lady.

I've been keeping myself amused by taking laps around the house and enjoying the wide range of Sunday morning TV. I finally felt up to a shower this morning, which was heaven. That's always when I know I've turned the corner. You finally feel clean and fresh and human. Something about wearing the same pajamas for 36 hours can get you down.

I feel a little bad because DH's birthday is tomorrow. I wish I could at least take him out to dinner or something but I don't think it's in the cards. At least we're having the party this weekend. Hopefully his new TV comes tomorrow--that will keep him amused for days!

 

[pearlieq]

1/9/06 - Happy Birthday DH!!!

9:00am

--2/3 order plain pancakes w/a bit of sugar free syrup

I'm coming back, slowly but surely. I didn't have much of an appetite this morning, but at least I had something approaching real food.

I've been doing some thinking lately. I'm very, very grateful that I don't seem to have been afflicted with as much of the horrid case of self-loathing that seems to affect some larger women. There's this commercial I saw a bunch of times last night that made the statement "If a 5 year old says you're fat, it's because you are". While that may be true, is that supposed to motivate or shame someone into losing weight?!? My first reaction to it was if a 5 year old says you're fat the 5 year old needs to have a talk with mom and dad about tact. But there seems to be this culture where fat people are supposed to accept rudeness like that because they're fat and obviously too worthless to demand simple human respect.

There's those silly weight watchers commercials on right now where they say "somewhere there's a woman who feels like the biggest one in the room" or something like that. SO WHAT?!? Is she supposed to shivel up and die under the obvious humiliation of being big?!? What the heck??? I can't imagine living a life where I'm so self conscious about my weight and who I am that I can't even enjoy a party because all I can focus on is my relative weight versus everyone else in the room.

I know people, my mom included, who won't wear a bathing suit because of their weight. Why would you miss out on the fun of swimming just because you're larger? Duane the trainer once made the comment that it usually takes several sessions for his larger clients to feel able to work out in the actual club. As if large people are only supposed to exercise in darkened corners lest they offend the thin people?!?

I just don't get why people can hate fat and hate themselves that much. I can't imagine accepting that as your reality and living in that kind of miserable world instead of fighting back. I'm glad I don't live in that world, but it seems like a horrible place to spend a life.

12:00pm

--1 bean burger
--1 corn on the cob
--part of a salad w/ranch

Lunch out with DH. Trying to salvage some kind of celebration for his birthday.

3:30pm

--1 cup sorbet w/1T M&Ms

This has been such a nice day. I love this stolen Monday afternoon with DH and I just spending time together and enjoying each other. I took him bowling after lunch and then we stopped in at Cold Stone for a treat. Afterwards we walked through a local gallery, then it's off to the movies!

4:45pm

--a few sm jolly rancher rocks

A little snacking before my movie started, mostly due to boredom.

7:00pm

--1/2 salad w/ranch
--1/2 single loaf brown bread w/butter
--a little less than 1/2 order cheese fries w/ranch
--few bites pasta entree

For someone who got released from the hospital less than 72 hours ago, this was a very, very dumb choice.

All I can say in my defense was that I was very, very hungry and this was the first appealing food I'd seen in days. Luckily I realized the appetizer got me very full, so I packaged up all of my entree, save about 1/4 cup. I stopped eating my salad early as well. I'll take it as progress.

We spend the rest of the evening puttering around with the new cable modem and estimating our taxes. Super fun...

 

[Lesli54]

Good morning, Pearlieq!

Well, you seem like you are getting back to your old self again. At least you're feisty again.

Obviously our society has really painted a picture that we are to reject larger people. Especially when a child can only see the difference in size and can no longer see the individual for who they are. Sure I had my youngest make a comment when she was 4 or 5, but then we talked about how rude that was and that if a person was a good person, it didn't matter what they looked like. But not everyone does that any more. Things are so superficial. I guess, I don't really get the commercial because someone telling me that I need to lose weight was never a motivator for me. That was something that I had to decide. I had to decide that I wanted more out of life and I think that is basically true about most people on this journey.

You should thank your mother for raising such a self confident and strong woman despite the weight obstacles that both of you faced while growing up. I do know some that have struggled with weight since childhood and they are not near as confident as you are, although they are not self-loathing either. You have a lot of strength and I think that you can do anything that you put your mind to, which is why you are going to win this fight.

Have a great day and keep up the fighting spirit.

PS. Happy Birthday to your DH!

 

[pearlieq]

1/10/06

2:00pm

--2 chick'n sandwiches
--1/2 cup applesauce
--1 jello cup

This is first I've felt like facing food today. As predicted, last night's cheese fries were a terrible choice and I felt so awful this morning! Luckily I was able to take it kind of easy and work through it.

I also made some of my progress on my work project this morning. My goal is to have the first big piece done before our staus meeting on Thursday morning. It feels good to move foreward. I just got asked today to stay on for projects through December, which is both good and bad. The money's nice, the work sucks. I suppose we can use it, though.

I'm going to be doing more tax estimating and budget tweaking this afternoon. Hopefully it will be good news from Uncle Sam!

 

[pearlieq]

1/12/06

The last couple of days have been a stretch of chores, work, and new technology. I think I'm pretty much back 100% and I'm now in party planning mode. We should have a good crowd on Saturday and I want to hit the right balance between structure and casual fun.

9:00am

--4 pieces Wonder bread toast w/butter & jam
--3/4 cup applesauce
--1 bottle gatorade

I did not mean to eat that much. I was making a couple of pieces of toast and there were two pieces of bread left in the bag. Somehow instead of putting them away they jumped in the toaster. Ugh. Most of the "sick" food is getting used up. I'll be glad to see it go. It's mostly sugary, which is fine when you're depending on it because it's the only nutrition you can get down, but not so great just hanging around your house afterwards.

I actually got some work done this morning, which is a load off my mind, but now I'm waiting for some information from one of my contacts so I'm sort of stuck again. I finally set a deadline for myself just so I couldn't sit and stew over this for weeks.

The lady who cleans the house is here now, so I'm just hanging out and staying out of the way. I think I'll run out and do some shopping later. I need to get a few groceries for the party, and some supplies for the kids. I think we're going to try to do a quick game round-robin early in the party just to introduce folks around and break the ice. I need to pick up a few things for that as well.

 

[Lesli54]

Good morning, Pearlieq!

I am glad to see that you are feeling much better. You sound busy getting ready for the party. What fun. I just know that everyone will have a good time.

Have a good weekend.

 

[Blueeyes101817]

glad that yo uare feeling better--

have a great sunday!

 

[Mykelogan]

Hi Pearlieq!!

Just wanted to come by and see how you are doing, glad to hear you are feeling better!!! Hope things went well this weekend!

Have a great week!
Mike

 

[eeyore25]

Hi there,

Glad to hear that you are feeling better. Hope you had a great weekend!!!!

Keep up the great work! Happy Monday!

 

[Lesli54]

Good morning, Pearlieq!

Looks like you are being missed around here. How was the birthday party? Good and fun, I hope.

Here's hoping you have a good week ahead.

 

[pearlieq]

1/17/06

I'm back! I've missed this and everyone here very much over the last few days!

I spent Friday doing mostly party prep work. I was hoping to get ahead of the game for Saturday. In retrospect I'm thankful for all I did, otherwise Saturday wouldn't have worked.

Saturday morning started out quietly enough. I had a bunch of errands scheduled, but it looked like it was going to work out. The kitties were due for their annual checkups and vaccines, and we actually had a pretty easy time of catching them in the morning. We lucked into a cancellation at the vet and got an earlier appointment, even. So, we packed them up and they sang us their sad, sad car song about how awful it is to be packed up in a little crate and taken out in the cold and shoved in the vomit comet.

The vet visit was pretty routine. Magellan is officially overweight at 14.5 lbs. That, plus some evidence of an allergy, caused the vet to recommend we switch their food to a special one made of Duck and Peas. Yum... The exams over, she gave them their shots and we went on our way.

Once we got home, I left to go pick up DH's cake, and DH decided to run to his office to pick up an easel in case anyone wanted to play Pictionary at the party. I got back first about an hour and 15 minutes later, to find the house had been destroyed! Someone had gotten sick in each and every room of the downstairs! The culprit was quickly identified as Diana when she got sick again 3 times in the first 15 minutes I'd been home! We called the vet and they wanted us to bring them back. Diana is usually very difficult to catch, and I wound up having to grab her by her tail to get her, which really upset me. We got them back to the office and found out Diana was having an allergic reaction to her vaccine. They gave her Benadryl and cleaned her up, and we wound up sitting at the vet's for a while unti things calmed down. They finally had to give her a steriod shot to get her to stop getting sick. She made almost no noise on the way home. We wound up confining them to the upstairs bathroom to keep them quiet and help them get some rest.

With that done, DH ran out to buy a steam cleaner for the floor. Our carpet was wrecked! I got busy doing last minute things for the party. The party itself was OK. DH had a good time, and that's what counts. We weren't able to do the round robin since a couple people didn't show up at the last minute and we needed a certain number of folks to do it. I felt kind of bad because we had put a lot of work into getting it ready, but oh well...

Some people wanted to play games, but a lot of them didn't and refused offers to get a game going. Then a few others were antsy to get a game going. For the most part, though, the ones that played seemed to have fun, and the ones who wanted to sit and visit did fine too. Again, it just seemed like DH and I wasted a lot of time/energy/money to get games ready and no one was that enthusiastic. I think maybe the party was too big for a game night. I think that type of thing works best with 8-10 people, not the 20 or so we had floating around.

Like my last few parties, I was struck by how rude, inconsiderate, and self-centered people can be. I had to chase down RSVPs from a few people. How hard is it to call and say yes or no--especially for a "real" party like a birthday where I'm offering to go to considerable expense and effort to entertain you?

My mom has recently developed this awful habit of showing up 20 minutes early (she says she misjudged the time to get to our house--we've lived here for 18 months, she should have it by now!!!). It wouldn't be a big deal, but she demands attention right during those critical last 15 minutes while I'm trying to get things done. She offers to "help" but my mom isn't very mobile and it winds up that she "helps" about has much as your toddler "helps".

We had a few people just not show up. I understand one gentleman's wife was sick, but DH's boss' wife just plain didn't show up and kept one of her sons home too (a $10 kids gift bag gone to waste...) No reason or apology given. We also had folks roll in as much as 45 minutes late! Again, no reason, apology, or even acknowledgment given. Parental supervision of the kids dropped off pretty quickly so I had 7 kids running through my house jumping, screaming, and banging. One of them spilled a drink upstairs and didn't tell anyone, another broke DH's keyboard. They kept fussing with the TV even after I asked them not to. I wasn't exactly sad to see them go home.

I just didn't really enjoy myself, to be honest. I'm starting to find these big "invite everyone" parties really aren't worth the effort, even though they are a very good way to tell the well-mannered people from all the rest. I spent the whole party working. I was either answering the door or refilling the drink tub, or fussing with the buffet, or herding people in for presents, or cutting cake, or herding kids, or chatting up the person that seemed on the fringes, or managing my mom, or trying to get games started. I am very grateful that DH was able to relax and have fun, after all that WAS the point of the evening, but I never really did get to enjoy myself.

Oh well, I suppose it was just one evening of my life. I just would have been happier in my jammies ordering pizza.

I had hoped Sunday would be quiet, but between DH getting all worked up over football and the kitties not bouncing back as fast as I'd hoped, it was another busy day.

Yesterday DH was off from work, which is good and bad. It was nice to have him home, but he was a bit underfoot. Diana seemed recovered, but Magellan couldn't keep any food down. The vet suggested we given him Benadryl and keep back food for 12 hours. The Benadryl did not go over well. He spit it back at me and got a lot of it on his fur. Bubblegum is not his favorite flavor! The fasting did seem to help, and by the late evening he was able to tolerate small amounts of food. So, hopefully he's on the mend.

And that gets me back to today. It's been a quiet day. I went to lunch with a girlfriend of mine who had the day off. Now I'm just resting and surfing until DH gets home.

 

[Lesli54]

Wow, and I thought I was busy.

I am glad that you survived the weekend. There is always the pros and cons of big parties. I can definitely relate to working right through them and as of yet, I still haven't figured out how to get around that short of hiring a caterer. But at least your DH enjoyed his birthday celebration and like you said that was the main thing.

Sorry to hear about the kitties. Hopefully, your week will be much better.

Sending for a great week ahead.

 

[goldcupmom]

Wow, Pearlie, you've been BUSY!!!

The party sounds great, just rude, uncaring people. Seems to be quite an epidemic. At least it sounds like your DH enjoyed and hopefully now you can get a bit of down time/fun time for you.

Have a great weekend.

Glad the kitties are also on the mend.

 

[pearlieq]

1/23/06

Long time, no WISH. It's not even that I've been super busy or anything, I've just been in a downswing. I haven't had that much motivation. I'm still hanging on to about 5lbs of holiday weight, and I really should consider myself lucky it's not more.

I'm working to bring myself back up. Today was actually a kind of decent day. I finally sat myself down to get some work done, just so it wouldn't be hanging over my head and depressing me. I also actually cooked dinner tonight and as of 10:15 this evening we haven't ordered pizza. I'll take my victories where I can...

I want to stick with the plan tomorrow and get work done in the morning, then spend the afternoon on chores or personal pursuits. It feels a lot better.

Back tomorrow, I hope...

 

[pearlieq]

1/24/06

8:40am

--2 pieces whole grain white toast w/1T butter and 1T low sugar jam
--1 cup lemon yogurt

Well, I'm up and around and ready to get on with the day. I'm going to work from 9am to noon, then maybe get to the gym or exercise somehow. DH won't be home until quite late so we're both on our own for dinner. I might head out to the library this evening. It's been a while since I've had a quiet night of reading.

10:20am

--1 cup spaghetti oh's
--1 cup Sierra Mist
--2 more pieces of toast w/butter & jam

I've gotten a little off track this morning. I let myself get frustrated and distracted away from work, then I got into munching. This isn't great, but so much better than it could have been. The devil in me wanted to run to McD's for 2 egg & cheese biscuits, hashbrowns, and maybe a cinnamon roll. At least I was able to stop that. I'm going to try to focus on work for another hour or so, then go find something fun to do.

2:30pm

--1 cheese enchilada entree
--waaaay too many tortilla chips
--3 T white chocolate chips

Stellar meal...

8:00pm

--1 Jimmy John's provolone sub
--1 pkt barbecue chips
--1 king size Kit Kat

Ugh. Again, bad choices. The only thing I can say for myself is that I didn't stop for Great Biggie fries and a frosty to go with it.

10:00pm

--2 jello cups
--1 bowl panda puffs
--1 PB&J sandwich

I didn't really need this. I was crabby and pouting, if we're going to be honest about it.

This was not a stellar day!

 

[goldcupmom]

Just remember that Little victories are still victories!

Hope you have a relaxing evening. Books are wonderful friends.

Are you staying warm? I miss snow!

 

[pearlieq]

1/25/06 - Where has January gone?

10:00am

--2 PB&J

I really like the low sugar jam. It tastes just as good as regular with 1/2 the calories!

1:00pm

--1 cheese enchilada entree
--1 orange

Off to run errands. I've got to return some DVDs, then I'm going to visit a friend. Somewhere in there I may need to pick up and fill a perscription and go to the store. Busy is good, I suppose.

 

[Lesli54]

Good morning, Pearlieq!

Sorry, I haven't been around lately. If nothing else, at least I will have internet at the new store so that I can check in more often than I have been.

Looks like you are busy, which is good. AND although not all of the choices are great, you have to admit that they are still better than they could be. Not ordering the late night pizza is a HUGE win.

I hope that your day goes well today.