A question for Mother's of Boys

[TnKrBeLlA012]

I don't have any sons. Three girls. My sister's have girls and I come from a family of all girls. We have know boys. My question is, if you take your son out and there is no bathroom and he has to go potty,do you let them pee outside? I have a friend who everytime we go for a walk he has to pee. She lets him go on the side of people's houses. My three year old girl is always wondering what he is doing. I won't let her look. I tell her he is looking for something. I personally think this is so wrong. I tell her to ask him before the walk if he has to go potty. She says she does. I think she thinks there is nothing wrong with this. I guess it all goes along with her horrible parenting. She also tells me he poops his underwear everywhere they go. She laughs about it. The boy is three. I think he knows he can get away with doing this. I just wonder if other parent's let their boys do this? It is really bothering me.

 

[Poohgirl]

Ok, I will be the first to admit it here...I have allowed my sons 8, & 9 to do this on occasion. Not against a house or in any sort of public place. But if we are camping, up at the lake, or on a hike, and they have to go with no bathroom readily available, yup into the woods they will run. I do hope they understand the difference of necessity and availibility though.

 

[Cool-Beans]

One time on a road trip, when one of the boys (4 years) had been saying he had to go for quite a while and now couldn't hold it anymore, DH pulled over and they went off behind a tree.

I claim no knowledge of what happened there, but when DS got back in the car he no longer complained about having to go.

The boys never peed on anyone's house. (knock on wood) Not on my watch, anyway.

 

[disykat]

In the woods on a hike, of course. In a neighborhood or anywhere where someone could come upon us - no way! Only dogs and cats can get away with that.

 

[christinadei]

I have a 6 yo boy and I'll let him go outside, but NEVER in public or on someone's house. What is she thinking? The times DS goes outside is at home (we live in the woods) when he has to go reallly bad on the way home, i'll let him get out and go on a tree if he can't make it inside and wait for us to lock the door, etc. Other times have been camping, etc.

 

[Chilehead Too]

My 4 y/o pees outside all the time. G-D forbid he would take a break and come inside. Actually I prefer to let him pee outside when we are out and about too. So much easier. But I don't advocate peeing on anything or anyone.

 

[LukenDC]

Peeing in the woods, on the side of the road, or in a rural countryside is one thing. I find that perfectly acceptable. Peeing up against someone's house or urinating in public is very wrong. The mother who allows this is doing her son a terrible disservice.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

EWWWWW! On neighbors houses?

When we are outside hiking, at baseball games without a restroom, etc I don't think it's a big deal, but he's not a dog. And now that I think about it, I don't even let my dogs pee in someone elses yard. They have to wait until we get to a common area.

He should go before they leave the house and then wait. Sounds like he's conditioned to think that going for a walk means peeing en route. At the very least, she should put a leash on him when walking...

 

[ckay87]

Only in a real "I can't hold it anymore" emergency. Have used Snapple bottles (how handy they are) in traffic jams, for example. It's a real lame bonus of having boys, that you're able to do this. But, no, I don't let them wizz willy-nilly all over the neighborhood. Of course, they are 10 and 13 now, so who knows? I hope not!

 

[Becky2005]

I haven't done this nor would I when houses are around, etc... I could understand camping, etc... HOWEVER, my kids *wouldn't* do it even if they could. I'm trying to remember way back when for my one boy we were driving somewhere (I'm not sure if this was our drive to Disney because he was always saying he had to go then too)...it was to the point of we had been LOOKING for a restroom for a while and there wasn't one to be found and I was afraid he was going to wet his pants -- I suggested doing a pull off the side of the road and use some woods -- you would have thought I asked him to cut off his arm or something. He totally freaked out on me for that suggestion and was having no part of it. I honestly think he would have rather had an accident than do that -- I know we eventually found a restroom and no accident.

As for the pooping -- I guess that just depends on if he's a just 3 and potty trained or an older 3. I had that problem with my 6 year old for a while...he took forever to get to the point of pooping in the toilet...we worked a lot on it, so during that time we were forever having messy underwear (although usually that was only at home, he rarely pooped in other places -- but I *always* carried a spare set of clothes for him at least in the car because we had so many oops can't make it potty accidents with him).

 

[Keli]

I think it's disgusting to let little boys use the whole of outdoors as their toilet. When you're out in the woods or in an emergency situation, well sure, I understand that. But honestly, I would let my dd go to the bathroom in those same circumstances if it were that much of an emergency. But when it's for convience sake, forget it!

 

[noodleknitter]

In the country, by the road, and in private, I say have at it. It is one of the boy bonuses. Never in town. If he is still haveing that kind of issue with urine control, maybe he should still be in dipes. It isn't unusual for a boy that age. As far as "other issues" many boys still have difficulty with this at age 3. It is good that your friend is not letting it get to her, IMO. Some people are totally anal (if you'll excuse the term) about toilet training, and judgemental about others.

 

[diznygirl]

My 6 yr old son has never peed outside. It's not something I want him to learn. Cuz, being a boy, he would think it's so "cool" and want to do it all the time!

If we are on a walk, we go home and use the bathroom. Easy as that.

And since we don't camp, the hardest thing would be finding a restroom in a mall or at Disney.

 

[YourMajesty]

My neighbor has a girl that does this. She is almost 5 and still goes in the backyard. I have caught my boys before...I really do not approve and they know it.

 

[Dina]

No, I never encourage my son to pee outdoors. However we've been on long trips from the shore and have had to pull over late at night because my 3yo couldn't make it and he has pee'd on the side of the highway (our car was blocking him from view). And once-- this is bad and I will be flamed as a bad guest, but I really didn't know what to do. He was 3.5yo and he jumped out of the pool at WL screaming that he had to go (hey at least I trained him not to pee in the pool right, although I obviously still had to work on that waiting till the last minute thing), and we ran for the bathrooms-- but he didn't make it and had an accident on the run to the building (actually I guess that could have happened to a boy or girl). At least it wasn't on the walkway and landed mostly in the bushes next to the hotel. I cleaned up as much as I could from the ground with his Nemo Beach Towel, and then threw it out. Then I took him in to get showered (again-- at least I didn't let him back in the pool). I now realized I guess I should have put a swim diaper on him, but that was the one and only accident he ever had. He's never even wet the bed-- he has a great bladder. Guess he was having too much fun in the pool That's my confessional-- whew-- I feel better to have gotten that off my chest-- that has been bothering me for the past few years-- I've never told anyone that. But, no I never ever encourage that. I always make sure he goes right before we leave the house.

 

[americanmale]

Lighten up folks, it was one of my joys as a young boy to write my name in the snow if I had to pee during a snow storm!!

 

[ReggieB]

My DH has let my DS5 in the past, all emergency situations allegedly. Personally I am always slightly horrified, I always nag that they should have gone before they left the house. It's not like they have ever been in the back and beyond, or hours away from home!

 

[noodleknitter]

Lighten up folks, it was one of my joys as a young boy to write my name in the snow if I had to pee during a snow storm!!

My husband's song is "Being a boy is great...Being a boy is wonderful..." He belts it out, as I am suffering, waiting for a RR, and he and the boys are feeling quite relieved.

We have always been hikers/campers/boaters, and my kids boys and girls have all been proficient in dealing with the "matters at hand." They are much more coordinated than i am!

 

[hlbtimes2]

I have been known to let me son (and sometimes my dd) take care of it outside when needed. Its not all the time, and not when there is a bathroom close by. And I would NEVER let them go in a neighbors yard while out for a walk!

 

[Aidensmom]

I have let my son do this one time. We were at an Arthritis Walk, and the starting/finishing point was at a country club who had told the arthritis foundation sponsoring the walk that their bathrooms would be available for the participants. However, on the morning of the walk, the country club manager would not let them be used. My son was 3 at the time, and really had to go. So he went out behind the country club.

I would let him do it in a camping type situation, as I would if I had a daughter.