A little miffed with daycare/preschool

[Schmeck]

For those who think age 3 is too young to start learning letter sounds, here's a little info:

http://www.growupreading.org/toddlers/index.php?section=210

 

[nessz79]

For those who think age 3 is too young to start learning letter sounds, here's a little info:

http://www.growupreading.org/toddlers/index.php?section=210

I wasn't one who said that 3 was too young, but I didn't see anything about connecting written letters to letter sounds, etc in this article. To me, the article was more about a toddler's oral vocabulary and grammatical rules that they are putting together...but to me, it was all oral speech.

Not saying that kids can't learn at age 3, just saying that not all kids are going to learn this so early.

My son's Kindergarten teacher says that the best age to teach children to read is between the ages of 4-7. That, to me, means that children can learn at age 4 and they can also learn at age 6, maybe not even until 7.

Not picking on you, Schmeck, just putting my 2 cents in about the general issue.

 

[agnes!]

I wasn't one who said that 3 was too young, but I didn't see anything about connecting written letters to letter sounds, etc in this article. To me, the article was more about a toddler's oral vocabulary and grammatical rules that they are putting together...but to me, it was all oral speech.

Not saying that kids can't learn at age 3, just saying that not all kids are going to learn this so early.

My son's Kindergarten teacher says that the best age to teach children to read is between the ages of 4-7. That, to me, means that children can learn at age 4 and they can also learn at age 6, maybe not even until 7.

Not picking on you, Schmeck, just putting my 2 cents in about the general issue.

Well said.
agnes!

 

[las3888]

From my experience with DS who is 3.5 and attends both a "school readiness" class at gymboree and preschool (a church play-based preschool) 2x a week, at this age there is a very wide variance. Some of the kids his age can write their name without even tracing it, although not many at all. DS can only do so if he traces and he is not too terribly interested in it either. At our preschool, which I love, they are not doing this kind of work just yet. They will focus on some of these skills later in the year and then more so in the 4 y/o class to a greater degree. I am pleased with that. DS is very very bright--asks questions that are surprising. At this age, I am really happy to focus on his social skills (sharing, being considerate, using manners, listening to teacher, standing in line nicely) and this is what his teacher is really focusing on. As our local kindergarten teacher put it...I can teach your son or daughter how to read or write or do letters, but when they get here and don't have good social skills, then we're in trouble!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Is it possible that the teacher was referring to your child's motor skills and not really the actual writing of the name? Meaning maybe he has trouble holding a pencil/crayon etc. and it got lost in translation?

Each child is different. Some do write at a younger age. Some don't. I would speak to the teacher privately and see what exactly she means. Good luck.

 

[daisy2]

I work with 3 and 4 years I have a 3 year old who just turned 3 in June and he can barely hold a pencil we work on writing his name.I use a high lighter and he traces it. I don't push it because he is just learning how to hold the pencil and his small motor skills are just developing. I agree with you he will get it when it's time. The teacher stepped out of line. You know what rights for your child. If anything Just having him trace straight lines with a marker or circles are good for him at this point. Good luck.

 

[pigget74]

Is it possible that the teacher was referring to your child's motor skills and not really the actual writing of the name? Meaning maybe he has trouble holding a pencil/crayon etc. and it got lost in translation?

Each child is different. Some do write at a younger age. Some don't. I would speak to the teacher privately and see what exactly she means. Good luck.

No, there was nothing lost in the translation. She said the same thing to me that she said to DH. She specifically said that he has a hard time spelling his name and writing. Well duh, if he can't spell it how is he to write it. When we write his name he traces it great. I am not worried about it at all. I am ging to talk with the Lead Teacher on Monday. Would have already, but the baby has had a virus since Wed. so I have not been to the school.

 

[cinderwannabe]

Depending on where you live this may or may not be a concern for your child at this age. I know in NY the kids are expected to know all letter (sounds and who to write them) beofre they enter K. So in this case I would appreciate the teacher communicating the childs level. What would concern me as a parent is the fact that the teacher/husband/and possibly yourself are discussing this in front of your child. This is one sure way to set him back! No need for him to hear everyone saying he is "behind" all the others. Next time request a meeting OUT OF EAR SHOT OF THE KID AND DONT DISCUSS IT AT HOME IN FRONT OF HIM!!!!

 

[pigget74]

Depending on where you live this may or may not be a concern for your child at this age. I know in NY the kids are expected to know all letter (sounds and who to write them) beofre they enter K. So in this case I would appreciate the teacher communicating the childs level. What would concern me as a parent is the fact that the teacher/husband/and possibly yourself are discussing this in front of your child. This is one sure way to set him back! No need for him to hear everyone saying he is "behind" all the others. Next time request a meeting OUT OF EAR SHOT OF THE KID AND DONT DISCUSS IT AT HOME IN FRONT OF HIM!!!!

Well I would have never wanted thisbrought up in front of him, she is the one that did. All of our home discussions are away froom him. I am with you on this--I am not happy they she mentioned this in front of him. Sorry if my post earlier indicated that we were discussing this in front of him.

 

[Debbie7452]

I've so been there with this issue. When my DS was in pre-school there were kids in there who could write their names perfectly. I felt like I wasn't doing my "job" since he was not even interested in learning that skill! The more I tried to encourage him to write and read, the more he resisted...and I was trying to make it fun, honest!

Fast forward to beginning of first grade...he was still barely writing or reading and his teacher tried to sign him up for special ed and that he would most likely end up repeating first grade! The counselor tested him and told me that he was just not ready and would do it on his own schedule. Well, sure enough he suddenly "got it" and passed with flying colors. He is now an A student in Middle School in the gifted class. I'm not trying to brag about him...just pointing out the incredible variation in development of each child. Don't stress out...I would be mad at that school, too.

He still remembers feeling "dumb" because his teacher made him feel that way.

 

[ToddyLu]

Yipee, the OP is from Mississippi like me. I am excited to see a thread on education started by a fellow Mississipian--since we seem to come in last here. I must say I had a great public education here in this state. Kudos to you mom for teaching and for being involved in your child's education when ever and wherever that may be in life. Wasn't t Einstein that didn't talk until he was five?

 

[pigget74]

Yipee, the OP is from Mississippi like me. I am excited to see a thread on education started by a fellow Mississipian--since we seem to come in last here. I must say I had a great public education here in this state. Kudos to you mom for teaching and for being involved in your child's education when ever and wherever that may be in life. Wasn't t Einstein that didn't talk until he was five?

Our schools here are great. The Middle School where I teach just earned National Blue Ribbon School. Only four in the state got it and I think around 300 around the country. It is a very high honor.

 

[mommyof2princesses]

I haven't read all the posts, but to help out the OP. My dd started reading at 3 1/2. I decided to homeschool her and she started kindergarten at age 4. We chose a wonderful reading program, but it had a lot of writing. I was lucky she had the small motor skills to write her name, I wasn't going to push it. By the end of kindy, she was able to write some words. Now that we are in 1st and she is 5, I expect her to write the words for each lesson. I know she is now ready and I don't penalize her for mixing up capital and lowercase. It will come.

She was NOT ready at 3 or even 4 to really be "writing". Kids need time. They need to color and play. I hope you get this all sorted out. And in no way, should a teacher ever tell a child, especially a small one, that they are behind. What is that about?

 

[mommyof2princesses]

Depending on where you live this may or may not be a concern for your child at this age. I know in NY the kids are expected to know all letter (sounds and who to write them) beofre they enter K. So in this case I would appreciate the teacher communicating the childs level. What would concern me as a parent is the fact that the teacher/husband/and possibly yourself are discussing this in front of your child. This is one sure way to set him back! No need for him to hear everyone saying he is "behind" all the others. Next time request a meeting OUT OF EAR SHOT OF THE KID AND DONT DISCUSS IT AT HOME IN FRONT OF HIM!!!!

Expected, yes, required, no. When I lived in NY, a school told my neighbors that their child couldn't start kindergarten if he couldn't write his name. I told them that according to the law their child only need to be 5 by a certain date and couldn't deny their child the right to his education. Personally, I think it ridiculous to expect any child to be able to write before they enter kindergarten. That is what they are there to learn!

 

[agnes!]

Expected, yes, required, no. When I lived in NY, a school told my neighbors that their child couldn't start kindergarten if he couldn't write his name. I told them that according to the law their child only need to be 5 by a certain date and couldn't deny their child the right to his education. Personally, I think it ridiculous to expect any child to be able to write before they enter kindergarten. That is what they are there to learn!

And isn't it sad that someone had to point out to a school that they are supposed to teach?!?

pigget74 -
I have been following this thread with interest. I am so sorry the 'counselor' said something in front of your DSon. What's sad is maybe there could be an issue(which I doubt), probably there isn't....but your precious child will now be convinced that there *is*. And expectations can often be a self-fulfilling prophecy.

When he gets good grades, when he aces his SATs, maybe you should take the results to this person and wave them in her face .

Something similar happened with my DD when she was little, a school secretary said something inappropriate in front of her. Ohhhhhhh, man....I know I got a rep from that, but I didn't care. It was a hill I chose to die on. She overstepped her bounds and was making school policy where she had no business doing so. I called my DH at work and said "Whatever time the principal has free, you will be there."
It got handled.

agnes!